# Devastated my little angel has gone....



## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

Tonight I am devastated that we had to make that.sad decision to put my little angel to rest...I am just so upset and in such shock, I am completely distraught.

Harvey was 14, he had been having seizures now multiple daily for nearly 2 years, our vet felt then that we wouldn’t have him long....but he coped well.

He had a few other tummy issues and was such a cling on to me it upset him terribly if I was away working and he had to stay with my husband who he did love....but he wasn’t me....

We have noticed his fits getting worse and he was falling down a lot...but tonight his front and back right legs just gave way and he couldn’t get up, he was distressed not knowing what was wrong, I sat and held him and comforted him because I thought he would recover after a short time.

He didn’t, so we called emergency vet and had to take him in, they examined him and confirmed as well as the seizures affecting his right side, his right back leg was out of socket, she put it back in twice and it kept popping out.

We couldn’t put him through medication and tests, and the vet said she thought it was the right thing for him, especially as he had other issues going on, but I feel so guilty, have I given up on him too quickly?
I know in my heart that it was the right thing to do for him.......but for me I am suffering so much hurt at losing him....I am just in shock, my head is pounding and I feel sick.

How am I ever going to get over this and him not being by my side.

I am having him cremated and will bring him home again.....this is so so hard.


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## lorilu (Sep 6, 2009)

Oh no I'm so sorry for your loss of your beloved Harvey. You are in shock of course, but know you did right by him all the way to the very end. Be gentle with yourself. I'm so sorry. xx


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

Thank you, I do know in my heart it was the right thing, but there is just that little niggle of doubt.....I think because it’s such a huge decision to have to make.

I just can’t stop crying and thinking I’m never going to see his little face again....I’m just devastated.

Thank you again for your kind words x


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## Guest (Jun 14, 2020)

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself.


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## DanWalkersmum (Mar 21, 2019)

So sorry for your loss, you gave him a good life and had the courage to make the right decision for him in the end when you needed to. Please take care of yourself x


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Very sad - so sorry for your loss


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## ttaylor45 (Jan 3, 2011)

Kittynanna said:


> Thank you, I do know in my heart it was the right thing, but there is just that little niggle of doubt.....I think because it's such a huge decision to have to make.
> 
> I just can't stop crying and thinking I'm never going to see his little face again....I'm just devastated.
> 
> Thank you again for your kind words x


I am so sorry for your loss I know it is so very hard but he was a very lucky dog to have such a caring owner. I lost Rusty and Pepe in the photo in 2018 within 6 months of each other Rusty was 13 and a half but Pepe was only 12 and 4 months and although I have another toy poodle puppy now who is 18 weeks old today called Teddy I still miss them so much. Don't get me wrong I love little Teddy a lot but I still wish they were here as well. Teddy is distantly related to them both as I went to the same breeder so that gives me a bit of comfort. Take care and in time I am sure you will remember the good times as I do.


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

ttaylor45 said:


> I am so sorry for your loss I know it is so very hard but he was a very lucky dog to have such a caring owner. I lost Rusty and Pepe in the photo in 2018 within 6 months of each other Rusty was 13 and a half but Pepe was only 12 and 4 months and although I have another toy poodle puppy now who is 18 weeks old today called Teddy I still miss them so much. Don't get me wrong I love little Teddy a lot but I still wish they were here as well. Teddy is distantly related to them both as I went to the same breeder so that gives me a bit of comfort. Take care and in time I am sure you will remember the good times as I do.


I am sorry too for your loss, I have read your posts and knew about your two, and your new addition, I am glad you've got him and from same breeder.

I have been up most of the night, just can't stop replaying it in my head......I have cried more for him than even some close family!! He was my baby and I was his world, all he wanted was me......

Thank you everyone for your kind words it means a lot.


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## ttaylor45 (Jan 3, 2011)

Kittynanna said:


> I am sorry too for your loss, I have read your posts and knew about your two, and your new addition, I am glad you've got him and from same breeder.
> 
> I have been up most of the night, just can't stop replaying it in my head......I have cried more for him than even some close family!! He was my baby and I was his world, all he wanted was me......
> 
> Thank you everyone for your kind words it means a lot.


I have cried more for Rusty and Pepe like you more than some people I have lost. Rusty particularly was very attached to me so much so that when we went for a walk he would only walk if I held his lead whereas Pepe didn't mind although after we lost Rusty he started to cry if I just went to the local shops even though my husband was still there. I don't think it helped as he was nearly blind by then through cataracts and glaucoma.


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## lorilu (Sep 6, 2009)

Kittynanna said:


> He was my baby and I was his world, all he wanted was me......


You still have each other. And I don't mean that to sound trite, I mean it truly, he is safe and well and still loved by you. Not everyone is open to it, but if you are, he may visit, to let you know he is well and happy and still by your side. xxx

I find great comfort in these visits, but I know not everyone does.


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

I am so sorry to hear of your loss @Kittynanna

Take care xx


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## Cherished Pets (Apr 9, 2020)

So sorry for your sad loss.
R.I.P Harvey you gorgeous boy x


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

Thank you all so much your kind words mean so very much x


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## Guest (Jun 16, 2020)

I’m so sorry for your loss, it takes so long for the pain to dull but it will, in the meantime please take comfort in something a wonderful vet I worked with once told me and I’ve never forgotten......

It’s better a day too early than a day too late

Sleep tight Harvey, I’m thinking of your Mum, I know how you feel


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

It was so very very hard.


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## Guest (Jun 16, 2020)

You can’t change what’s done lovely and Harvey won’t want you beating yourself up because you missed one TWO SECOND moment out of a lifetime of wonderful moments you were there for


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## jill3 (Feb 18, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. The pain of loosing our much loved pets is Heart breaking. There is always a nigggle about putting to sleep. I still have them and it was years ago. 
You know you did the right thing as we did with ours. Its just something we are not use to doing and thankfully not very often.

I am sure you will meet up with him again one Day xx


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

I really do hope so......


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

I'm so very sorry for your loss, It's so hard when we have to say good-bye to them but we know we are doing the right thing for them.

We had Dillon back and we have put his ashes near him favorite place in the garden with the potted Thyme plant on top, it's was the herb he use to have so much fun trying to dig out and pull a part. 

Be kind to yourself, remember the happy times.XX


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## Kittynanna (Feb 15, 2015)

Thank you I am trying to get through each day, when I get his ashes back I am having a ring made with some of them, so that will be special.

It’s just awful to get over, take care everyone and thank you.


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