# Should I sell my puppy



## KathyS (Apr 13, 2015)

No harsh comments please. Well, to sum it up I turned 18 on April 1 and have felt depressed since I was 16. I've wanted a dog since I was old enough to know what one was. Now I'm not at school and older, my parents decided to get a puppy for my birthday. My parents and brother said they will help, but they work during the day, so its mostly me. I really thought a puppy would help me feel better and I would be able to look after it. We bought a white German Shepherd and she is 11 weeks old now. I have been walking, taking her out and trying to train her every day but I don't feel as motivated as I thought I would be. My family says I have been doing well so far but I don't think so. It hasn't happened so far, but I'm really scared Ill lose the motivation and start neglecting her. I don't want to end up leaving her. I know if I diddnt feel this way I could spend more time with her and get much more training done. My mom has suggested we could sell her. I do and don't want to at the same time. My brother will be really disappointed If we sell her as he loves dogs and has always wanted one. Also If we do sell her Ill feel like a failure and probably never get a dog again. Has anyone else felt like this, any advise?


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## Alice Childress (Nov 14, 2010)

I don't think you should be _selling_ her. Did you not sign a contract with the breeder for the puppy to go back to them if you can no longer keep her? I'd contact the breeder anyway even if you didn't. If they don't care (which would be awful of them, but sadly it does happen). I would be finding a decent rescue and asking them to help find her a home where she will not be moved on again. For free. I know you will have lost money buying her, but what is important is her finding the best home, not the money. A rescue will fully vet homes and make sure that that happens.

I'm sorry you are struggling. Puppies are very hard work, and if you are having such serious doubts, rehoming her while she is still young sounds like the right move - but in the right way.


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## Canine K9 (Feb 22, 2013)

Yep, when my current dog was 11 weeks old, I wrote an advert out for him. I never published it, but I was so frustrated with him! 
I had a pretty idealist view. Cuddles, long walks in the sunshine and a great friend. Instead I ended up with a little gremlin who loved to bite me, chew my stuff up, bark, whine, zoom and steal things.
If she's driving you mad, have you considered an exercise pen? Crate? House line? 
Otherwise, I would invest in smart toys like kongs. You can stuff them with food and it occupies them for ages 
Puzzle Toys: A Beginner's Guide to The Most Useful Dog Toys Ever | 3 Lost Dogs
KONG Stuffing

Short 5 minute training sessions throughout the day- you can try Nosework stuff with her, training basics etc

Good luck


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## Fleur (Jul 19, 2008)

Most people go through a 'what have I done' phase after getting a puppy - in some ways I have found puppies harder than my human babies.
If I was you I would ask is this 'puppy blues'? Once the puppy phase is over where do I see myself in 5/10/15 years? A dog is very much like having a permanent toddler in your life - everything you do you first have to consider the impact on the dog.

If you feel that the long term owning of a dog is not for you at this time then that is not being a failure it's being brave enough to realise you made a mistake, And you need to take full responsibility for that - Do not sell your puppy, speak to the breeder (if reputable they will take the puppy back or help rehome) or go to a German Shepherd Rescue to make sure a good home is found.


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

If you do feel you can't cope then get in contact with the breeder who should hopefully take the pup back. Do it sooner rather than later for the puppies sake.

Such a shame it hasn't had the desired effect, but it's good that you are putting puppies welfare first


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## Rahoulb (Dec 17, 2013)

Are you getting help for your depression?

My pup really helped me when I had depression but it was pretty mild. 

It's a bit presumptuous I know but feeling a lack of motivation and thinking you will never get a dog again are probably symptoms of the illness and not related to how you are actually doing. 

From the pup's point of view she will need your help; if you don't feel up to that there's no shame in saying so. But finding a suitable home Is something you should take care over. 

Sorry there are no easy answers. She could be the best thing to ever happen to you but puppies are always hard work. 

Good luck.


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## lozzibear (Feb 5, 2010)

I had 'puppy blues' with both my two. Jake was a little bit older than Arrow, but I got them with Arrow just a few days after he came home... he was an exhausting puppy though. Now though, I wouldn't be without either of my boys


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

Puppies are awful demonic creatures, they lure you in with their cute looks but they are blinking hard work, and whilst I never considered getting rid of my two, I went through stages of really not liking them and that they had turned my life upside down and I think if you have been depressed it can really knock your self esteem and confidence and leave you questioning your choices, I love my dogs and I love what they have done for me in the respect that they given me a reason to get up and they give me the confidence to go out and about walking with them and they now give me a huge amount of joy and have been so good for my mental health, but if you really really feel that you can't cope with having her then I would contact her breeder and get their help, but it is completely normal to have an 'oh my god, what have I done' moment and to suddenly feel anxious and overwhelmed by the task of raising a pup, it can come and go for quite awhile so don't make a quick panicked induced decision. There was a very good thread on here about the puppy blues that might help as it will show that you aren't alone.


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## LinznMilly (Jun 24, 2011)

KathyS said:


> No harsh comments please. Well, to sum it up I turned 18 on April 1 and have felt depressed since I was 16. I've wanted a dog since I was old enough to know what one was. Now I'm not at school and older, my parents decided to get a puppy for my birthday. My parents and brother said they will help, but they work during the day, so its mostly me. I really thought a puppy would help me feel better and I would be able to look after it. We bought a white German Shepherd and she is 11 weeks old now. I have been walking, taking her out and trying to train her every day but I don't feel as motivated as I thought I would be. My family says I have been doing well so far but I don't think so. It hasn't happened so far, but I'm really scared Ill lose the motivation and start neglecting her. I don't want to end up leaving her. I know if I diddnt feel this way I could spend more time with her and get much more training done. My mom has suggested we could sell her. I do and don't want to at the same time. My brother will be really disappointed If we sell her as he loves dogs and has always wanted one. Also If we do sell her Ill feel like a failure and probably never get a dog again. Has anyone else felt like this, any advise?


You sound like you're doing a fantastic job and have the potential to be a great owner.

When you're either solely responsible for a dog (especially a puppy), or you have the lion's share of the work, it's difficult to see the wood for the trees, so don't dismiss your family's comments out of hand. You're so busy with today's problems that you don't see yesterday's achievements, so what I would advise you do is sit down and write out exactly what you've taught her - you might surprise yourself. I find To Do lists (or in reference to the dogs, "In Progress" lists), daunting and draining. It feels like a mountain that I have to climb, whereas an "Achieved" list makes you feel accomplished.

The overall feeling I get from reading your OP is that you're tired. Raising a dog or a puppy is damned hard work, and while I appreciate your family are at work, sometimes if they could just take her for a 20min walk in the evenings, or in the morning - just to give you a break - you might feel that little bit better. Time-out for the dog with a kong (possibly in a crate) while you have a cuppa might help too.

How long have you felt like this? Is it a day? A week? How have you felt in yourself?

I can't speak for anyone else and I don't have depression, but I do have other health issues, and I know that when I'm going through a bad spell, or when my health issues are keeping me awake at night and I become sleep deprived, I start thinking maybe I'm not good enough for the dogs, and maybe I should rehome them. If someone asked me that on a good day, when my health is under control and I've just had a couple of good nights sleep, a snowball would have more chance in Hell than me giving the dogs up.


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## picaresque (Jun 25, 2009)

You obviously have a supportive family behind you which must be a great help so I would give yourself more time before making a decision you might regret. A lot of people have a bit of a panic in the weeks after getting a new puppy, what with the sudden change in your lifestyle and the enormous weight of responsibility. 
Having said that, I think it's an all too common misconception that getting a puppy/dog will help or even 'fix' depression. It is a complex condition which affects people differently but if someone is really struggling, taking on such a huge responsibility is not a good idea. It could well be that your dog will end up being of huge benefit to you and vice versa, especially with your family's backup. I know I had big doubts and fears when my dog was a pup - he's five now near enough and I wouldn't be without him. If you do decide you really can't cope then as previous posters have said, don't sell her, return her to the breeder (if that's an option) or go through a good rescue.
I wish you all the best.


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## Yorkiemorkiemum (Jun 14, 2012)

LinznMilly said:


> You sound like you're doing a fantastic job and have the potential to be a great owner.
> 
> When you're either solely responsible for a dog (especially a puppy), or you have the lion's share of the work, it's difficult to see the wood for the trees, so don't dismiss your family's comments out of hand. You're so busy with today's problems that you don't see yesterday's achievements, so what I would advise you do is sit down and write out exactly what you've taught her - you might surprise yourself. I find To Do lists (or in reference to the dogs, "In Progress" lists), daunting and draining. It feels like a mountain that I have to climb, whereas an "Achieved" list makes you feel accomplished.
> 
> ...


As someone who has suffered with depression most of my life in various levels and now other health issues, I can understand where your coming from a little. Every pup I've had, in the first few months, I've thought OMG I can't do this! The problem I find with my depression is I can be a little self absorbed and its all about me, how I feel, and that due to a strict upbringing I never feel I'm good enough! When it comes to it and I look at my little pups face I think that I'm being selfish. What I'm really thinking is, this little munching, chewing, barking, pooping machine has disrupted my cushy life and I have to put a lot of work in here! When my oldest boy was born I was very young and my Mum helped me a lot but I could put him in a cot and he slept, he didn't chew everything within spitting distance! Dogs, like children, are a massive responsibility but I think you are the BEST because you are considering rehoming your dog because you think your no good enough not selfish like I was. Incidentally, I have two small dogs one is 12years old and the other is 3 years old and I'm recovering from a big surgical operation and due you know who listens to all my moaning and gives me cuddles and really don't care if we don't do training as long as we can cuddle and I feed them, they get walks and show them I love them? My dogs


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