# Honest answers needed please



## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Right this poll is anomous so I want people to be BRUTALLY honest in their responses.

The question is would you allow your child / children to spend time at their friends house if the friends parents were gay.

I'm not asking if you support gay rights, are against it etc. 
Simply would you allow your child to visit.

A conversation with a friend got me thinking today and she is of the view that a lot of people would not like it. 

Whilst a person may have no problem with gay people and be friends with them etc. they would not want their child at their home as it creates an awkward situation if the child then starts asking questions or in case the couple are affectionate etc. in front of the child.

Just wanting some other opinions really.

Thanks


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## RockRomantic (Apr 29, 2009)

i would


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## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

I wouldnt have a problem with it 
tbh I doubt a child would realise there was anything different about the people living in the house , and if they did notice and asked questions then id answer them 

children are a lot more tolerant than older people can be & they realise a lot more than we give them credit for 
they look to the adults around them as to how they should act


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## mitch4 (Oct 31, 2009)

If i had children, id not have a problem at all, i wouldnt have even thought about it being a problem


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## Starlite (Sep 9, 2009)

Of course! Gay people are happy and not hurting anyone, whats the problem?

Kids need to know there are different kinds of people who love each other, not always mummy and daddy.
Im not saying ram it down the kids throat or anything but i dont have an issue with it


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

That's an interesting phrase as the exact same thing that the friend today said, ram it sown their throats.

What would you see as ramming it down their throats?

Would it be a problem for a gay couple to kiss, hold hands, be affectionate etc. or would this be too much?

I'm not talking about anything that a straight couple wouldn't do in front of children, just regular couple stuff not a full blown orgy


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## Starlite (Sep 9, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> That's an interesting phrase as the exact same thing that the friend today said, ram it sown their throats.
> 
> What would you see as ramming it down their throats?
> 
> ...


kissing etc im fine with but beyond that i dont want my kids seeing anyone doing lol!
I felt embarissed the first time my stepdaughter stayed and saw me lying in the same bed as her dad 

Also some people can be weird. I remember going to a new friends house when I was about 14 who's parents were born again Christians and they kept harping on about it and interrogating me! _That_'s ramming soething down someones throat


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Right makes sense.

I would be really un-comfortable with anything more than kissing from anyone and i'm an adult lol.

I have one friend who is so over the top in public and used to sit and nibble her boyfriends ear when they visited, was very strange.


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## mitch4 (Oct 31, 2009)

i dont like over the top kissy cuddly stuff from anyone in public :scared: holding hands a quick kiss hello goodbye, thats enough, leave the rest to when your on your own together


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## sequeena (Apr 30, 2009)

Of course I would. I'd be more worried about the safety of my child in someone else's home than what sex the couple are.


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## Sandysmum (Sep 18, 2010)

I don't have young children, but if I did I wouldn't have a problem just because of someones sexuality. What would matter is if they were nice people.


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## 0nyxx (Aug 9, 2008)

my son spent a lot of time when he was younger at a gay couples home I know well & still keeps in touch with them now


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## ddb2 (Oct 17, 2010)

i have a male gay friend and i would be ok with my children seeing him with his partner, and my 16 yr old daughter also has a male gay friend and they all go out together with their boy or girlfriends as teenage couples do, so i know she has no problem with it, i think nowadays it is a lot more accepted than when i was growing up, and so it should be, why shouldn't a person be happy with their sexuality and why should they have to hide, and i think if parents are honest with their children it is something they grow up to accept and understand :thumbup:


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## dobermummy (Apr 4, 2009)

i have no problem with it at all. my best friend is gay and my kids love her. she is the one person i can always depend on so why loose that coz of her sexuality :confused1:

My little girls is even gonna be a bridesmaid at her wedding soon :thumbup:


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Ive voted no, but it would depend at what age my children would have been if i allowed it or not.


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## missyme (May 28, 2008)

i wouldnt have a problem with it my kids are pretty open minded anyway and if being there made them uncomfortable they wouldnt want to go x


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

missyme said:


> i wouldnt have a problem with it my kids are pretty open minded anyway and if being there made them uncomfortable they wouldnt want to go x


Yes i agree thats a fair comment thats why it depends on age, if they are old enough to feel uncomfortable and know why and be able to make the decision not to go then thats good a younger child, would/could know something was different or feel uncomfortable and not really know how to react.


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## LostGirl (Jan 16, 2009)

dont have a problem with it at all, mine know that people can love the same sex, im honest with mine I would rather be and them be open minded even at a young age


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## thedogsmother (Aug 28, 2008)

I think it really depends on the couple, I certainly wouldnt rule anyone out because of their sexuality, my cousin is in a gay relationship and I would trust both her and her partner with my children but I have to know the people very very well before I would leave my kids, regardless of the sexuality. As far as holding hands etc goes as long as its appropriate and not done in a sexual way I wouldnt have a problem but my kids have seen me and my oh holding hands etc.


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

This is a strange thread! What difference does it make if my childs friends are gay or straight?  What do people think is going to happen if they let their child go to a gay persons home?  

Have you considered that there may be parents of a gay child who may be horrified to think this is the way other people view them? 

My 16 year old son has had these issues, he's confused about his sexuality, so yeah, statements like this make could make someone like him even more confused/ashamed  And i'd be horrified if his friends didn't come over because of it, because if that's the case they aren't friends anyway. 

I don't choose my childs friends, he chooses his friends, and i'd never dream of telling him when and where he could go. He has several friends who are bisexual/gay/lesbian! He regularly sees! Michaels bi friend has even slept over! It's no different to any other friend, and why would it be? ALL Mikes friends are welcome in my house.


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## Freyja (Jun 28, 2008)

When Ben was 13 he had a job collecting glasses in a pub just down from us. It was run by 2 gay men. They were great the pub was always busy ever since they left it has been empty and done next to nothing. 

They were great with Ben and I trusted them with him mind you they both knew Ben did kick boxing and even though they were both a lot bigger than him they knew he could quite easily put them both on the floor without giving it a second thought. They encouraged him to take his girlfriends to meet them. They wre not a couple in fatct one of them got married and we went to his wedding too.


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## ebonymagic (Jun 18, 2010)

My Mum is Gay!

Her and her partner are not the sort of people to flaunt their sexuality in front of any of their grandchildren.

My son who is 13 only found out about them last year, because that is when he asked.


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## Mum2Alfie (Jan 4, 2010)

My son being my son I would have to say just as long as they agree not to kiss and that infront of him. More for their embarrasment then anything else....as the questions would come and knowing him he would say it was yucky and stuff! Im not being funny, I have gay friends and have no problem with it, but watching Hollyoaks atm I just dont like seeing that kinda thing myself. Let alone what his being saying about it! I agree that to learn about different people is a good thing, but that kinda thing....nope! Not at his age. When he gets older and can understand it better.


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## billyboysmammy (Sep 12, 2009)

I have absoloutly no problem with it.

My kids know families come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, could be granparents raising children, foster parents, adoptive families, extended families, single parents, shared parenting, conventional couple or gay couple.... its all OK and its a healthy attitude to have imo!


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## turkeylad (Mar 1, 2009)

No problem at all..............:thumbup:


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## lil muppet (Apr 4, 2008)

i would have no problem with this at all!! as long as you can trust them with your child then it does not matter if their gay, straight, green with blue spots!!  
i would never just flaunt it infrount of anyone unless i knew them and never in frount of children but i think that kissing (not dna swapping!!) and cuddling is fine infrount of the child. but if someone is leaving their child with you then they obviously trust you and belive that you will act accordinly around the child!


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## Mum2Heidi (Feb 17, 2010)

My views wouldnt change regardless of gender. If I thought my child would be safe and well cared for then yes - no problem.

As for difficult questions arising - it's 2010 and kids have asked quite a few over the years. When sex was taboo, those questions cuased problems. It's par for the course I'm afraid - perhaps the parents should address their issues first then they will be able to answer the questions without reservation.


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## harley bear (Feb 20, 2010)

Well i think this thread is a rather wierd one.
1, because why does it matter about someones sexual preferance
2, shouldnt bi sexual people be included in this thread because they like the same sex too.

My aunt is gay and i would happily leave my kids with her and her partner. I dont like any couple being to ott with eachother! It makes no difference if a couple is gay or straight the most important thing is that you can trust them 100% with your child.


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## fire-siamesekitty (Jun 8, 2010)

Yes..because everybodys different


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## Leah84 (Jun 22, 2009)

so long as they were trustworthy then i couldn`t care less, my brother is gay so i think he`d be a bit peed if i never let my daughter visit him


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## smudgiesmummy (Nov 21, 2009)

dont have a problem at all, ive got gay mates and i wouldnt stop my kids (if i had any) going there


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Haven't voted as not got kids but I cannot see why anyone wouldn't let it happen. It isn't as if being with a gay couple is going to rub off on a child; It is not a case of gay people being any different, just like disabled people/black people, foreigners etc. I think that children take people at face value and wouldn't question a gay couple kissing anymore than their parents kissing. There are too many bigots in the world and too many who are too protective and making assumptions about people. Sorry but to me the option that the couple would not kiss etc in the presence of any kids is insulting to the couple. Being gay does not make any situation different. Face value is how it should be.


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## bird (Apr 2, 2009)

Would I stop a child from visiting their friend, just because the parents were gay. No absolutley not. 

The only reason I'd stop any child visiting any house regardless of the sexuality of the occupants would be whether or not I thought the child would be looked after in it.


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

I haven't got kids, but my nieces used to spend a great deal of time at our house (most school holidays and weekends) and it would never have occurred to me not to take them with me when I visited gay friends. Similarly, it would never occur to me not to let them visit their own friends if their friends' parents were gay.

Why on earth should anyone's sexuality come into the equation? And yes, kids may ask questions if they see a gay couple holding hands or kissing, but that is a good situation to introduce the idea that affection between couples - whatever their sexual orientation - is normal. The more kids grow up accepting a person's sexuality as normal, the better place the world will be.


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## skyblue (Sep 15, 2010)

ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


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## billyboysmammy (Sep 12, 2009)

skyblue said:


> ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


gobsmacked!

___________________________________

Seriously i think this thread is likely to offend a large number of members whether they are gay straight bendy or wobbly .


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## ClaireLily (Jul 8, 2008)

skyblue said:


> ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


 think thats a bit prejudice and ignorant if I'm honest!

I'd love to think if I had kids that they would be brought up surrounded by people who can demonstrate a happy healthy loving relationship regardless of gender and the only thing they would ever feel the need to question would be if someone was mistreated in any way. What an outdated and insulting comment


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

skyblue said:


> ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


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## bird (Apr 2, 2009)

skyblue said:


> ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


:nonod: :nonod: :nono:



billyboysmammy said:


> gobsmacked!
> 
> ___________________________________
> 
> Seriously i think this thread is likely to offend a large number of members whether they are gay straight bendy or wobbly .


'Fraid that kind of comment comes from men at times.  And unfortunately its something that hubs would probably come out with, until I point out that he's spouting utter ****.


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## Cazza1974 (Sep 23, 2009)

I have done


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## billyboysmammy (Sep 12, 2009)

i wonder how some of you people would feel about a gay teacher or someone who works in schools!

Being gay/bi/straight is not contagious you know!


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## ClaireLily (Jul 8, 2008)

billyboysmammy said:


> i wonder how some of you people would feel about a gay teacher or someone who works in schools!
> 
> Being gay/bi/straight is not contagious you know!


I don't see that its anyones business, I'm guessing all hell would break loose if it came out a teacher was gay but I certainly wouldn't have any issues with them teaching my kids.

Doesn't this all harp back to the very outdated, untrue, ignorant belief that all gays are paedophiles? Utter nonsense!


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## MarKalAm (Sep 6, 2008)

Yes- No prob at all.


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

I would not have a problem.


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## bird (Apr 2, 2009)

billyboysmammy said:


> i wonder how some of you people would feel about a gay teacher or someone who works in schools!
> 
> Being gay/bi/straight is not contagious you know!


Don't give a fig what the sexual orientation is or anything else, all I'd care about is whether they were a good teacher.  However I pity the poor soul who lets it slip if they're working in a non too nice high school, nowt so cruel as teenagers at times.


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## billyboysmammy (Sep 12, 2009)

bird said:


> Don't give a fig what the sexual orientation is or anything else, all I'd care about is whether they were a good teacher.  However I pity the poor soul who lets it slip if they're working in a non too nice high school, nowt so cruel as teenagers at times.


True

My daughters first teaching assistant was gay (his hubby was flippin gorgeous too) and they have 3 kids. Excellent teaching assistant and excellent parent!


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## Squeeze (Nov 19, 2009)

Chances are your child would know that their friend has 2 daddies or 2 mummies who love them regardless and all that... 

And the people who have said about as long as they would be uncomfortable with anything more then holding hands or kissing etc... What is with that...? Do you honestly believe gay people sh*g constantly in front of people... Let alone in front of a child...?!


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## RAINYBOW (Aug 27, 2009)

Absolutely yes. and if they ask questions, bring it on i say, what a great way to introduce children to the idea of same sex relationships 

When i was a teenager my best friend lived with her dad, her step dad and her mum all in the same house, her real dad and mum were divorced and he had his own lounge, office, bedroom and bathroom, seemed wierd to other people but worked just fine for them, i never thought anything of it


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## Nicky10 (Jan 11, 2010)

If I trusted them to look after my child yes. That isn't dependant on sexuality and whether someone was gay or straight wouldn't even matter in that decision. I don't see why it should make a difference whether they're gay or not. I might ask them to tone down being all over each other if they are but I would ask the same of a straight couple it makes me uncomfortable to see any couple all over each other.

I wouldn't mind my kids having a gay teacher either. It's not catching the kids aren't going to turn out gay/lesbian just because they're around gay people. Not that it would bother me if they were.


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Agree with the above posts. It wouldn't faze me in the slightest whether a teacher/teaching assistant was gay or not - it's their teaching ability I would be interested in.


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

I wouldnt have a problem with it and if my kid/s stayed for tea and I got out of cooking? Bonus!
I might have a problem with kissing and cuddling depending on how much was going on. Nothing to do with gender its just Im not a big fan of PDAs and what is normal to one person can seem inappropriate to another.
I remember when growing up I had a friend whose family were very open and would happily talk to you whilst they were on the loo with the door open or wander out the bedroom half dressed to find a bra or pants! It took all my self control not to scream "whats wrong with you??" at them!!:lol:


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

I have to agree with all everyones said, but i would certainly have no problem with it if my children (adults themselves now) were old enough for the situation to be explained to them so they knew but not when younger, i dont know why only its problerbly because i feel a little uncomfortable with lesbians, 1 of my oldest friends has a gay daughter and another friends 2 sisters are gay so yes they come here we all meet up at family or friends birthdays or nights out and ime fine with them we are all really close and they know how i feel and have a good laugh at me, they even tease me sometimes all this is with no malice, its just how i feel i do think the younger generation are more open minded to it because there exposed to them more when i was quite young i can never remembered hearing of gays.


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

I wouldn't have a problem with it at all, as long as my children were looked after correctly. I think it would be a great learning experience 

When I was younger I was badly bullied and one of the things I was bullied about was people would ask me if I was gay, or if I made a nice comment on another girl people would freak out, if I held a girls hand, etc.

So I am uncomfortable when a women hugs me, or complements me, if I do the same to another women cause I'm afraid they will think I'm gay when I'm not. Its just this fear I have and I wish I didnt have it :frown: I srsly do. The other week my mom commented on a girl checking me out (my new the girl was gay) and Ill admit it did back me in a corner.

But I srsly would not have a problem hanging, working with etc gay people and if they felt I was a little off Id explain to them why and I would hope theyd understand.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Nope, I don't mind


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## Guest (Nov 4, 2010)

i wouldnt have a problem with it and if they asked questions id tell them the truth.


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## kaz_f (Mar 8, 2009)

yep no problem - wouldn't even enter my head tbh


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## mitch4 (Oct 31, 2009)

its interesting that someone being gay makes another person uncomfortable, we are all people, all have the same social needs within reason as some of us are more home birds some extraverts etc.. but who we fall in love with or the sex of a person we fall in love with, should never be a factor in life where people are judged so differently if their chooseing is away from what society sees as the norm, whats normal, as said in may posts even hetrosexula relationships if the couple are extrovert with thier passion for each other this would be in my book uncomfortable

Oh and the minceing post, i used to work with a lovely guy, who was youd say and extrovert and was gay, now his personality was extrovert and im sure what ever his sexuality had been hed have been like this, i know he had many neices and nephews who loved spending the day with him as he was great fun, quite childlike in a nice way, he had no barriers to having fun in life but was a very intelligent and careing person, so picking out a part of someones personality can be done whatever your sexual orientation is, we can all have quirks Im sure i have many  its what makes us all individual.

Gay or straight acceptance and respect is the ultimate thing we can give each other Im glad in todays society the stigma that once was over such a topic is nearlly diminished


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## Guest (Nov 4, 2010)

I would yes.


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## piggybaker (Feb 10, 2009)

I would,, children need to learn that people are different, and kids tend to digest things and talk about it later at bed time and not at the moment in time,, well mine do LOL


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## happysaz133 (Jun 5, 2008)

For me it would be if they only agreed not to be kissing or forward. However not because they are gay, it would be the same for a male/female couple. I just don't think children need to see adults being affectionate with one another other than own parents.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

mitch4 said:


> its interesting that someone being gay makes another person uncomfortable, we are all people, all have the same social needs within reason as some of us are more home birds some extraverts etc.. but who we fall in love with or the sex of a person we fall in love with, should never be a factor in life where people are judged so differently if their chooseing is away from what society sees as the norm, whats normal, as said in may posts even hetrosexula relationships if the couple are extrovert with thier passion for each other this would be in my book uncomfortable
> 
> Oh and the minceing post, i used to work with a lovely guy, who was youd say and extrovert and was gay, now his personality was extrovert and im sure what ever his sexuality had been hed have been like this, i know he had many neices and nephews who loved spending the day with him as he was great fun, quite childlike in a nice way, he had no barriers to having fun in life but was a very intelligent and careing person, so picking out a part of someones personality can be done whatever your sexual orientation is, we can all have quirks Im sure i have many  its what makes us all individual.
> 
> Gay or straight acceptance and respect is the ultimate thing we can give each other Im glad in todays society the stigma that once was over such a topic is nearlly diminished


I know i said i felt uncomfortable and i do not male gays but female, its not that i dont respect them the people i know ive known them since they were small and we socialise with them, i just find it uncomfortable ime being honest like the thread asked, i certainly wouldnt want to see them kissing each other around me.


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

Wouldn't bother me if they were gay bi or straight, as long as they are of good character. Now kissing holding hands if it was the same as I would do in public, eg soft kiss goodbye, hello etc no problem. If it was french kissing I'd have an issue regardless of sexuality same with fondling there is a time and place regardless of your preference.....Its good for kids to see healthy relationships and holding hands, kissing and being nerdy like me I always tell my o/h Luv you hun is good for all ages.


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## ClaireandDaisy (Jul 4, 2010)

That is such an offensive question. It implies that gay people are likely to molest children. 
In fact (and I am talking facts not bigotry) a child is most at danger... from members of the family. *Most* cases of child abuse and murder and neglect and torture are carried out by the child`s own family. 
So in fact children, statistically speaking, are most at risk in the home.


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

YES!! Most definatly. Our best friends are gay and they are the legal guardians of our children if anything should happen to us both. Our children have been on holiday with them and fully accept them kissing ect, its normal to our children they just understand they love each other and thats it.

I must say I do find the question abit offensive to be honest. I cant imagine how a gay person might feel reading it tbh


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## piggybaker (Feb 10, 2009)

happysaz133 said:


> For me it would be if they only agreed not to be kissing or forward. However not because they are gay, it would be the same for a male/female couple. I just don't think children need to see adults being affectionate with one another other than own parents.


I am sorry but your joking aren't you,, its no different ,, it is an adult couple who love each other and I am sorry but if your child was a friend of my child and you said that to me,, your child could not come over,, the first thing i do when i see my hubby is to give him a big smacker on the lips and a cuddle,,I love him,, I know I certainly would never tell another mother not to show affection to her partner because my daughter/son was there.

The world to a child is all adult fighting over things that don't make sense,, I still don't understnad why we are at war and why there are so many issues in this country,, for them to see adults show affection to each other in my eyes is good,, I not talking about a partner walking in and inapproprate touching happening but common sense if you have a child there would be in play..

sorry if I offend but thats life.


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

piggybaker said:


> *I am sorry but your joking aren't you,, its no different ,, it is an adult couple who love each other and I am sorry but if your child was a friend of my child and you said that to me,, your child could not come over,, the first thing i do when i see my hubby is to give him a big smacker on the lips and a cuddle,,I love him,, I know I certainly would never tell another mother not to show affection to her partner because my daughter/son was there.*The world to a child is all adult fighting over things that don't make sense,, I still don't understnad why we are at war and why there are so many issues in this country,, for them to see adults show affection to each other in my eyes is good,, I not talking parnter about a partner walking in and inapproprate touching happening but common sense if you have a child there would be in play..
> 
> sorry if I offend but thats life.


I toally agree with this, children should see adults being affectionate.


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## piggybaker (Feb 10, 2009)

Thankyou,, children need to know you can live in harmony in a mad world, whether your male or female you can love who and whatever sex you like. but a good union is the most important thing,


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

piggybaker said:


> Thankyou,, children need to know you can live in harmony in a mad world, whether your male or female you can love who and whatever sex you like. but a good union is the most important thing,


Its is difficult to explain to children (mine being 3 and 4 years old). They pick things up and ask questions. Megan once asked why our friends were both girls and were holding hands and kissing. We just said they love each other....... surely thats all that they need to know!


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## piggybaker (Feb 10, 2009)

ClaireLouise said:


> Its is difficult to explain to children (mine being 3 and 4 years old). They pick things up and ask questions. Megan once asked why our friends were both girls and were holding hands and kissing. We just said they love each other....... surely thats all that they need to know!


agree with you,, my children are quiet forward 7 and 9 and we have exlained not in intermate details, but mainly that there is nothing wrong they just love each other like Mum and Dad 
My second cousin is gay and his married tto another man, so when my son had to do his family tree for literacy, it brought it all up again LOL kids have funny but inicent views,, one from my daughter was well if they love each other could one not have his tinkle cut off and become a woman:lol:


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## NicoleW (Aug 28, 2010)

I did answer saying that only if they agreed not to kiss infront of my child. For the following reasons:

I don't believe a child, (4 years) should be watching people kiss

THIS is only regarding tongue kissing, snogging etc.

I don't do this with my partner infront of my children so I'd kindly ask other parents not to do this.

Holding hands, small kisses such as a peck on the lips I really don't see a problem with aslong as it's nothing too saucy.

Gay, straight, bisexual, it doesn't matter. I'd ask ANY parent not to act this way infront of my children.

I openly talk to my daughter about women loving women and men loving men whenever it arises, I tell her that the only thing that is ever important is that the person is happy.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

We have gay male and female friends and they are treated the same as our hetrosexual friends. Neither katie nor I treat our friends from Africa etc any differnetly to our friends who are disabled, lesbian or homosexual. We treat everyone with the same respect and at face value.


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## NicoleW (Aug 28, 2010)

That's the kind of values and respect children need to be brought up in nowadays, it's disgusting to see children of 7 being racist or sexist.

Just because you have your own views doesn't mean you should instill them on your children. 

My daughter developed 'ghost friends' when we stayed with my mum for a while who is Christian, my mum proceeded to tell her that ghosts aren't real, for which I asked her kindly not to tell my daughter that. Just because someone doesn't agree with something doesn't make it wrong. 
I'd never tell my daughter God doesn't exist, nor will I tell her that he definately does. I'd never tell her or let her believe being gay is wrong, but I wouldn't tell her it's the right thing to do and you have to do it.


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## Squeeze (Nov 19, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> i dont know why only its problerbly because i feel a little uncomfortable with lesbians.


Wow... 
I was surprised by the orginal question... But I am horrifed by some of the responses on here...! 
Its 2010 for f**ks sake... Does it really matter who you share your bed with...? At the end of the day that is the only difference here...! Very narrow minded...


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## Horse and Hound (May 12, 2010)

Kids are Kids!

They won't care what sexuality the person is, all they care about is if they are fun to be around!

I would have no problem with it whatsoever, I don't see why anyone would.


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## snoopydo (Jan 19, 2010)

My Answer ...Yes.... 

Would never even think it would be a problem.


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## Starlite (Sep 9, 2009)

I have a gay female and male cousin, my female cuz is a primary school teacher so i know she'd be good with kids 

Its sad how some people can be tho. My male cousin came out just before his uni graduation and my gran refused to attend his celebration party! Miserable old. . and my family wonder why she gets on my nerves


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Thank you very much everyone, nice to see all your views!


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Whoops pressed enter too early.

For those of you who think I am being offensive by asking this question let me give you some background.

First of all ...

I AM GAY!
I have 2 childen who are raised by me and my girlfriend of 5 years.

The reason why I asked the question was that my daughter is having a party this weekend (can't believe she is 9 already  )

Anyway she invited 6 friends along to the party, 4 of which refused.

Thinking oh well they must be busy she then invited a different 4 friends who all refused as well!!

At this point I phoned round friends and family with children and BEGGED them to turn up as my daughter will be really upset if no-one is at her party and I mentioned to one of my friends that I think a lot of people are refusinbg because of my son.

A whole other topic but he is severely autistic and a handfull to say the least, he is known as the naughty kids and most parents / kids avaoid him which is why he is being looked after elsewhere on the day of the party.

My friend replied ' perhaps they don't want to come because you gay' which I was GOBSMACKED to hear as I thought why would that make a difference.

HENCE the reason why I wanted people's views.

Phew now that's all explained i'm sure you can all see why the question popped up, really pleased with all your answers too 

Glad that society has become more accepting and would hate to think that's why people were not coming to my daughters party.


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## Devil-Dogz (Oct 4, 2009)

Course if I had kids they would be allowed to attended, I have no problem with same sex couples. They are still humans, with feelings and the like. I dont see the big issue? Its a shame that in this day and age people will still be so sensitive about such things.


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## SuperSimoholic (Sep 16, 2010)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Whoops pressed enter too early.
> 
> For those of you who think I am being offensive by asking this question let me give you some background.
> 
> ...


If your son is the reason why you think they might not want to let them stay, did you tell them that he was going elsewere for the night?


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

No I didn't specifically tell people he would not be there as I didn't realise it would be such a big issue.

Plus seeing as the party invite says it's a GIRL'S party I would have thought they would realise he would not be there.

Oh well, managed to rally round some friends to bring their children and her 2 best friends will be there as well so she should be fine, maybe even make some new friends as she does not know all the children attending.


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## Nicky10 (Jan 11, 2010)

I hope your daughter has a good party despite some of her friend's parents being idiots regardless of whether it's because you're gay or your son


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## Maiisiku (Feb 20, 2009)

I would have to seriously think about my daughter going to anyones house, it doesn't matter if they were gay or not. She has never spent a night away from me and will not until I feel ready. I don't care if it's because someone is gay or not, I'm protecting my child because you can't trust anyone it doesn't matter if they are hetrosexual, bisexual or homosexual.


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

I completely understand that but remember that I am not talking about overnight.

It is a 3 hour long party, they are 8 and 9 year old's so not very young children AND parents are more then welcome to stay.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

oops I voted wrong, I would let them but not if they were getting it on with each other, thats not right imo for younger kids, I am not a homophobe I just wouldnt allow that is all until they understood.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

skyblue said:


> ok.....if it were gays that acted and dressed normal i'd have no problems,by normal i mean that a gay male who acts all feminine and minces instead of walking is a bit strange


well I agree with you !! I know what you mean and I have gay friends BUT the gays who are over the top flamers who NEED to let everybody know they suck co*k, well they irritate me, they seem to have issues with there sexuality and cant just relax and be gay or in a gay relationship without pushing it on others who have a right to be uncomfortable with it, it is afterall not natural, and I dont give a toss what anyone thinks about that comment that is MY opinion.



ClaireLily said:


> think thats a bit *prejudice and ignorant* if I'm honest!


well this was a thread for HONEST opinions you dont like it ? tough !! thats his views deal with it.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

ClaireLouise said:


> I toally agree with this, children should see adults being affectionate.


not sucking face and groping ass they shouldnt.


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## FREE SPIRIT (Jul 8, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> not sucking face and groping ass they shouldnt.


*lol...love it....so funny :lol: :lol:*


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

FREE SPIRIT said:


> *lol...love it....so funny :lol: :lol:*


hey mate I missed ya :thumbup: where ya been noodle


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

I hope you didn't find my post offensive cat crazy or anyone else.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Miss.PuddyCat said:


> I hope you didn't find my post offensive cat crazy or anyone else.


tough, I think people should be allowed to be brutally honest without fear of offending, if people are that sensitive about there life, thats not your problem its theres.


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## FREE SPIRIT (Jul 8, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> hey mate I missed ya :thumbup: where ya been noodle


*Missed you too, that's why i try avoiding ya...lol :ciappa:
Im never far away my friend....I lurk...lol *


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

FREE SPIRIT said:


> *Missed you too, that's why i try avoiding ya...lol :ciappa:
> Im never far away my friend....I lurk...lol *


ahhh well ya seen my intelligent threads then aye  :lol: and hey wtf ya cant avoid me for long i'll just invade ya fb page  :lol:


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> tough, I think people should be allowed to be brutally honest without fear of offending, if people are that sensitive about there life, thats not your problem its theres.


It would be nice if you could be brutally honest with some people all the time and just tell them flat out but I just didnt want people to be offended because I srsly dont have an issue with gay people its just from being bullied has made me uncomfortable but I do try to get over it.


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## Maiisiku (Feb 20, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> I completely understand that but remember that I am not talking about overnight.
> 
> It is a 3 hour long party, they are 8 and 9 year old's so not very young children AND parents are more then welcome to stay.


When my daughter was invited to her second cousins birthday party (he's 1 1/2 years older than her) all parents had an option to stay if they wished. Not many did, but those with younger ones did. I stayed the whole time, I know it's family so it's diffirent but I still would have wanted to stay as my little girl isn't 3 yet. Maybe I would be ok with it when she is 9 or 10, but I don't know. If I knew the parents well it would be diffirent. If I didn't know them then I'd see what my daughter said and want to meet the parents first.

But I've never even left her with family. Only at nursery and been with me. I am very over protective, but it's because I've seen a lot of bad in the world and until my child is big enough to protect herself it's my job.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Miss.PuddyCat said:


> It would be nice if you could be brutally honest with some people all the time and just tell them flat out but I just didnt want people to be offended because I srsly dont have an issue with gay people its just from being bullied has made me uncomfortable but I do try to get over it.


well yeah I dont have a prob with gays just poofs (there is a diff) I also think its too bad if others dont agree with my opinion on it why the **** should I accept it and be made to look ignorant just because others like it.


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

I'm not offended at all.

I opened this thread to get honest opinions whatever that may be!

You could tell me that gay people make you sick and they should all be put to sleep and whilst I would STRONGLY disagree with you I would not be offended at all.

It;s your right to have an opinion as it is anyone else right to choose not to listen to or follow it.

Besides i'm very thick skinned


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## FREE SPIRIT (Jul 8, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Whoops pressed enter too early.
> 
> For those of you who think I am being offensive by asking this question let me give you some background.
> 
> ...


*I think the votes on this thread go to show that the majority of people have no problem with it. I know i would be fine with my son staying with a gay couple. I don't judge people on their sexuality, i judge them on whether they're decent people or not.*


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## Nicky10 (Jan 11, 2010)

I sort of agree. Overly camp people irritate me because they seem to think it's ok to be really bitchy and comment on other people. It just seems very fake to me a lot of the time. I've known people who've acted for want of a better word very straight, they've come out and suddenly they're very very camp. While that might be their normal personality and they've been hiding it which is sad it just seems very fake and I don't like that. But if they want to conform to a stereotype that's their choice.

Like I said I couldn't care less what consenting adults do to each other and I don't see why it should matter to anyone else or why it would impact on their ability to look after a child. But then again I'm bi so it would be hypocritical to say that someone else couldn't be with the same sex


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> well yeah I dont have a prob with gays just poofs (there is a diff) I also think its too bad if others dont agree with my opinion on it why the **** should i accept it just because others do.


True stuff theres things in this world I would love to do but Im afraid people would not approve.



Cat_Crazy said:


> I'm not offended at all.
> 
> I opened this thread to get honest opinions whatever that may be!
> 
> ...


Thanks Im always worried of upsetting people  I hope your daughter has an awesome Birthday and I have worked with special needs kids myself (I have a learning disability myself) and I know people can be judgmental which is a shame because I have met some awesome amazing kids


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Something that a few comments on this thread have made me realise is that lesbians are lot more accepted than a gay male couple.

I wonder why that is? :confused1:

After all they are both doing the same thing so to speak.

Kinda makes me pleased to be a lesbian, at least i'm accepted by the majority of people, well except my parents lol


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Miss.PuddyCat said:


> True stuff theres things in this world I would love to do but Im afraid people would not approve.


damn !! you need to realise that you live ONCE live the way you want if others like it tough if they dont like it then tough. You will resent yourself later in life if you spend the years you have pleasing others and not yourself.



Cat_Crazy said:


> Something that a few comments on this thread have made me realise is that lesbians are lot more accepted than a gay male couple.
> 
> I wonder why that is? :confused1:
> 
> ...


Nope I feel the same about rug munchers as I do about co*k suckers if they keep it to themselves and don t come onto me or flaunt it like they need to prove a point then I am ok with that, but no matter if they are male or female its still not on to expect others to accept it.


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> damn !! you need to realise that you live ONCE live the way you want if others like it tough if they dont like it then tough. You will resent yourself later in life if you spend the years you have pleasing others and not yourself.
> 
> Trust me Ill be making it up for it next year, going out to get two tattoos for the START of my collection, and in Jan Im dying my hair either bright blonde or bright red. Was told I shouldn't because the new people at my job (Even though there are not rules against hair dye) are very picky but I guess you get that with working with 30 odd women. I wasn't very confident when I was younger so now Im gonna do alll the things I wanted to.
> 
> Crazy Cat I have nothing against gay men infact I have this romance novel on a gay men relationship its one of my favs.


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## billyboysmammy (Sep 12, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Whoops pressed enter too early.
> 
> For those of you who think I am being offensive by asking this question let me give you some background.
> 
> ...


I doubt it has ANYTHING to do with the fact that your gay. For the majority of people I'm sure it didnt enter their head when considering the party!

It may have something to do with your son, my son is special needs and he sometimes gets overlooked for invites - although alot attended his party, so i think its actually me being over sensitive.

The TWO main reasons i think though that people couldnt attend is that its bonfire weekend. Everyone who has planned to take their kids out may not want to do a party aswell as the kids will be shattered (or still tired from the night before). Its also the first weekend after most kids have gone back to school - another reason for them to be shattered.

My daughters birthday is at the end of July, just as the school breaks up for the summer holidays. After the first year I realised so many people couldnt go because of other plans and holidays I moved her party to a week earlier.


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## snoopydo (Jan 19, 2010)

ClaireandDaisy said:


> That is such an offensive question. It implies that gay people are likely to molest children.
> In fact (and I am talking facts not bigotry) a child is most at danger... from members of the family. *Most* cases of child abuse and murder and neglect and torture are carried out by the child`s own family.
> So in fact children, statistically speaking, are most at risk in the home.


I WAS going to reply with something along the same lines..But did'nt ''as I've already been slated Big Time this week for airing my views ''

But as you've already said it and I know it's not just me that thought it..

I'll 100% Totally agree with you :thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:

It is wrong to ask in the 1st place.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Something that a few comments on this thread have made me realise is that lesbians are lot more accepted than a gay male couple.
> 
> I wonder why that is? :confused1:
> 
> ...


What a pity your parents cannot accept you for who you are as I don't think there is such a thing as "what" you are. We are all individuals and should be accepted as unique whatever our colour, race, sexuality, shape/size/fitness of our bodies etc. Neither me or Katie see anyone different to us and take everyone we meet at face value otherwise we would be getting towards th "Hitler Scenario" if we treat some people as more important or different. As far as I am concerned whether people are royalty/disabled/mixed race/homosexual/lesbian whatever we all are born naked, we all go toilet, and we all die.


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## snoopydo (Jan 19, 2010)

:thumbup::thumbup: Well said John.


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

snoopydo said:


> I WAS going to reply with something along the same lines..But did'nt ''as I've already been slated Big Time this week for airing my views ''
> 
> But as you've already said it and I know it's not just me that thought it..
> 
> ...


Snoopy - as i've already said a few pages back there is a reason for asking the question.

I am gay myself and it is not meant to be offensive I just wanted people's views on an issue I have had.


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## noogsy (Aug 20, 2009)

i wasnt going to do this
because i know lots of gay couples including my neighbours
my littley goes to their house because they adore him
and he fixes their computer and wireless.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Snoopy - as i've already said a few pages back there is a reason for asking the question.
> 
> I am gay myself and it is not meant to be offensive I just wanted people's views on an issue I have had.


I appreciate why you asked the question but think this human race of ours is "label mad". Why do we all give ourselves titles like "fat/thin/gay/ugly/etc? You are a person and do not have to justify your sexuality to anyone although obviously in some situations we have to, but I don't say "Hi I'm John and I'm a fat ugly balding git".

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and I think if I remember rightly that everyone agreed the same on this thread, but tbh I think anyone who had any objections obviously has issues which are theirs not the people gay/lesbian or whatever. If someone said to us that they wouldn't let their kids come to our house because of our dogs, I would just say "OK, your kids will miss out then!"


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## ebonymagic (Jun 18, 2010)

It is harder to accept a family member is Gay than someone who is a friend because it affects you directly. I was 17 when my Mum decided that she wanted a gay relationship. She is still with her partner now and they got *married* in 2006.

I was devastated because it broke up my family unit. Being a Christian kind of makes it slightly complicated, I have asked various church leaders and have been told recently that the only way to move forward is to forgive the sinner not the sin.

Over the years I have accepted that my Mum is Happy and that is ultimately what matters, I don't like what she has done but being with her partner has made her more human and easier to talk to.

In their relationship my Mum is the *man* because she does stuff that the man would usually do in a heterosexual relationship (you will note I didn't say normal). When there are things that she can't do they have a male friend who helps out.

The most confusing part for my kids was before they got married, they have cousins who weren't technically that until the marriage. All the kids in the family except it as the norm and as I said in a previous post my oldest son has only recently realised that his grandmas are gay, he quite often says* eeeuww their LESBIANS* to which I reply *And?*

I have had so much stuff go on in my life that someone's sexuality really doesn't bother me, if they were not good with kids I would be concerned but otherwise Gay people are within the realms of whatever normality is these days.


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## snoopydo (Jan 19, 2010)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Snoopy - as i've already said a few pages back there is a reason for asking the question.
> 
> I am gay myself and it is not meant to be offensive I just wanted people's views on an issue I have had.


Yes I know. It's hard to write in words and come across properly..I meant it to mean ''It should'nt have been asked'' on the basis that there is nothing wrong with being Gay..And if I was Gay and someone stopped their kids coming to my house..It would be their problem not mine Yes I'd be offended but I'd also have nothing to be ashamed of..Hope I've put it better this time...I seem to write as though I'm talking


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

I haven't got kids and never intend to have any but if I was put into that position, I wouldn't have an issue at all.

Even if they were really camp.... kids have to learn that there are people like this and that they are just ordinary and are just as nice as anyone else. I think that if you shelter a child from gay people then they will be less likely to accept them as 'normal' in the future.

I also can't believe some of the things that have been said and the names called in this thread, completely and utterly immature and disgusting in this day and age. I'm just glad that I know better than to call people "rug munchers" "mincers" "puffs" and whatever else 

I haven't got a problem with anyone of any sexuality - it's their choice and their lives and they are entitled to do what they want. If they want to shove their sexuality or whatever down my throat then that's fine by me, i've made my choices in life and if I want to be straight or gay then I will be. and TBH if anyone tried to shove their religion or sexuality down my throat then i'd just shove mine back at them, see how they like it :thumbup:


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## hutch6 (May 9, 2008)

I wouldn't have any issue with it at all.

You don't choose to be homosexual through a lifestyle choice it is hardwired into your genetic/hormonal makeup just the same as anyone else's sexual orientation. Just because my kid (if I had one) saw two people of the same sex kissing or holding hands it doesn;t mean they will grow up idolising a homosexual way of life. They are either born homosexual or hetrosexual, it's not a religion or road you choose to take in life it is how you naturally are from birth.

If your child grows up to be a condfident, well mannered, hard working, generous, loving human being that embraces society and thinks nothing of helping others then who gives a crap if they are hetro/homosexual? Sure there might be dissappointment but why? What is there to be disappointed about if your child has found love, can express love and is happy? Are homosexuals that portray a hetrosexual lifestyle truly happy or do they resent and feel ashamed, scared and confused?


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

hutch6 said:


> I wouldn't have any issue with it at all.
> 
> You don't choose to be homosexual through a lifestyle choice it is hardwired into your genetic/hormonal makeup just the same as anyone else's sexual orientation. Just because my kid (if I had one) saw two people of the same sex kissing or holding hands it doesn;t mean they will grow up idolising a homosexual way of life. They are either born homosexual or hetrosexual, it's not a religion or road you choose to take in life it is how you naturally are from birth.
> 
> If your child grows up to be a condfident, well mannered, hard working, generous, loving human being that embraces society and thinks nothing of helping others then who gives a crap if they are hetro/homosexual? Sure there might be dissappointment but why? What is there to be disappointed about if your child has found love, can express love and is happy? Are homosexuals that portray a hetrosexual lifestyle truly happy or do they resent and feel ashamed, scared and confused?


Good post and very true.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Squeeze said:


> Wow...
> I was surprised by the orginal question... But I am horrifed by some of the responses on here...!
> Its 2010 for f**ks sake... Does it really matter who you share your bed with...? At the end of the day that is the only difference here...! Very narrow minded...


Ime actually not narrow minded at all, with 2 sons ages 20 and 23 makes sure i keep up with the times and ime not in any way against leabians as i said ive friends wih gay daughter and a friens with 2 gay sisters and ive known them since they were children, but ime being honest as the thread stated it wanted us to be and yes i do feel strange but not in the way that anyone would notice thats just how i feel. If you really knew me you would realise "narrow minded" was a poor choice of words.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> damn !! you need to realise that you live ONCE live the way you want if others like it tough if they dont like it then tough. You will resent yourself later in life if you spend the years you have pleasing others and not yourself.
> 
> Nope I feel the same about rug munchers as I do about co*k suckers if they keep it to themselves and don t come onto me or flaunt it like they need to prove a point then I am ok with that, but no matter if they are male or female its still not on to expect others to accept it.


:lol: god you have a way with words, but i feel the same what they do behind closed doors is everyones affair and up to them, but apparently ime narrow minded for feeling this way and i can assure anyone ime anything but. I thought it was HONEST opinions wanted.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> Ime actually not narrow minded at all, with 2 sons ages 20 and 23 makes sure i keep up with the times and ime not in any way against leabians as i said ive friends wih gay daughter and a friens with 2 gay sisters and ive known them since they were children, but ime being honest as the thread stated it wanted us to be and yes i do feel strange but not in the way that anyone would notice thats just how i feel. If you really knew me you would realise "narrow minded" was a poor choice of words.





haeveymolly said:


> :lol: god you have a way with words, but i feel the same what they do behind closed doors is everyones affair and up to them, but apparently ime narrow minded for feeling this way and i can assure anyone ime anything but. I thought it was HONEST opinions wanted.


yep it seems the only opinions accepted are the ones that agree with the majority, and If I was a homophobe thats my choice and my right to feel that way, I'm NOT but just saying IF I was its tough for the pc club I have just as much right to be anti as they do to be for it. I will bet half the peeps on this thread deep down dont really feel so open minded as they reckon they are just to scared to say it, or they want to impress peeps. No wonder people dont speak up if when they do they are cut down for it.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> yep it seems the only opinions accepted are the ones that agree with the majority, and If I was a homophobe thats my choice and my right to feel that way, I'm NOT but just saying IF I was its tough for the pc club I have just as much right to be anti as they do to be for it. I will bet half the peeps on this thread deep down dont really feel so open minded as they reckon they are just to scared to say it, or they want to impress peeps. No wonder people dont speak up if when they do they are cut down for it.


Exactly, well ime not going to say what i think people wnt me to say just because thats not me.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> Exactly, well ime not going to say what i think people wnt me to say just because thats not me.


me either :thumbup: :lol:


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> not sucking face and groping ass they shouldnt.


I did say affectionate! Not nearly having sex infront of them    IMO kissing and cuddling is normal and shouldnt be hid from children


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Whoops pressed enter too early.
> 
> For those of you who think I am being offensive by asking this question let me give you some background.
> 
> ...


Can I just add, I said I found the question offensive but I didnt mean that *you* had asked it, I found it offensive that people ask the questions in the multiple options in the op.
The thread isnt offensive, I just dont like the thought people can be so narrow minded and wouldnt let children attend the party.


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## sequeena (Apr 30, 2009)

I love gays.


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## PoisonGirl (Oct 24, 2008)

It wouldnt bother me in the slightest!

I have many friends who are gay  They are just normal people!

How narrow minded that it would bother people and also kind of rude! How would the straight parents feel if you said your daughter could not go over because they are straight?! Being gay isnt contagious!


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

It really wouldnt bother me if if someone wouldnt let their child come because i was straight tbh, so if there is no difference in straight and gay then it shouldnt really bother them either.


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

PoisonGirl said:


> It wouldnt bother me in the slightest!
> 
> I have many friends who are gay  They are just normal people!
> 
> How narrow minded that it would bother people and also kind of rude! How would the straight parents feel if you said your daughter could not go over because they are straight?! Being gay isnt contagious!


Lol I might try that one ...

' sorry my daugher / son won't be coming to your party as i'm realy uncomfortable with the fact that she may witness a hetrosexual relationship'

Wonder what response I would get


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## Bexy (Apr 11, 2010)

Absolutely not but would have a problem with them staying over with bigots.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Bexy said:


> Absolutely not but would have a problem with them staying over with bigots.


Dont know who bigot is actually aimed at i would say us that have disagreed with the majority, that doesnt make someone bigoted and i for one am not intolerant of someone elses beliefs or narrow minded.


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## Bexy (Apr 11, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> Dont know who bigot is actually aimed at i would say us that have disagreed with the majority, that doesnt make someone bigoted and i for one am not intolerant of someone elses beliefs or narrow minded.


It wasn't aimed at anyone. Whilst some people wouldn't want it "rammed in their child face" that exact phrase would apply in respect of peoples predujices for me.


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Right well thanks once again for your opinions everyone, interesting to hear what people's thought are.

If a mod is about then is it perhaps time to close the thread as the original question has been answered and things appear to be getting a little heated?


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Right well thanks once again for your opinions everyone, interesting to hear what people's thought are.
> 
> If a mod is about then is it perhaps time to close the thread as the original question has been answered and things appear to be getting a little heated?


And thanks for allowing people to be honest about this as you asked them to be in your op ime not offensive to gays have nothing against them and certainly wouldnt offend any of them so thankyou for taking posts as they were intended, its a shame that others have to get offensive. Thanks.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Bexy said:


> Absolutely not but would have a problem with them staying over with bigots.


 Now so if someone is not open to there child witnessing an unatural relationship (yes it IS unnatural just because y'all now do it dont mean its how it was sposed to be  That makes THEM a bigot? get real ffs The word homophobe itself is a made up bullying tactic to try to FORCE people to accept that lifestyle in others OR be labelled "bigots" How dare you even call someone that because they wont accept your unnatural way of life. 
If I pisssed on my neighbours door step and then called her a pissaphobe cos she didnt like it would that have been a natural thing to do ? nope but its just as ludicrous as been labelled a homophobe for been anti something NOT moral or natural.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Cat_Crazy said:


> Right well thanks once again for your opinions everyone, interesting to hear what people's thought are.
> 
> If a mod is about then is it perhaps time to close the thread as the original question has been answered and things appear to be getting a little heated?


I just wanna say how I respect you for allowing honest opinions  And it go's to prove my theories YET again that the pc club has no idea on how the people they "defend" actually feel, Gay people dont get all up in arms because others dont necessarily agree Yet there are STRAIGHT people who are all gobsmacked and moaning and been all "offended" Lmao too funny.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Please don't bite my face off if this has already been asked because I admit I haven't trawled all the way through this thread to check, but for those who said they wouldn't be comfortable with the scenario and those who minded in any way, how do you feel about gay/lesbian couples or individuals being able to adopt children? Personally, I think everyone has the right to have children and as someone going through the adoption procedure we were suprised how many gay/lesbian people were on our course of applicants and hope they get the equal respect and right as us (better not get a child before us though:incazzato::cursing: only joking)


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

JohnMorris said:


> Please don't bite my face off if this has already been asked because I admit I haven't trawled all the way through this thread to check, but for those who said they wouldn't be comfortable with the scenario and those who minded in any way, how do you feel about gay/lesbian couples or individuals being able to adopt children? Personally, I think everyone has the right to have children and as someone going through the adoption procedure we were suprised how many gay/lesbian people were on our course of applicants and hope they get the equal respect and right as us (better not get a child before us though:incazzato::cursing: only joking)


well I prolly should back outta this thread cos I am getting umm a lil well honest  But I will clarify I meant I wasnt open with overly ***** types like in ya face gay not normal people who happen to prefer same sex relationships in private same as I dont like straight peeps shoving there sluttiness in my face if that makes sense. 
As for kids well I dont think they should have equal waiting times I think a man/woman relationship ought to get priority over same sex only because it well isnt natural.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

JohnMorris said:


> Please don't bite my face off if this has already been asked because I admit I haven't trawled all the way through this thread to check, but for those who said they wouldn't be comfortable with the scenario and those who minded in any way, how do you feel about gay/lesbian couples or individuals being able to adopt children? Personally, I think everyone has the right to have children and as someone going through the adoption procedure we were suprised how many gay/lesbian people were on our course of applicants and hope they get the equal respect and right as us (better not get a child before us though:incazzato::cursing: only joking)


Depending on age and understanding maybe, i dont know, this is a hard one for me my first instinct is no i wouldnt like to see them adopt, but ime sure as individuals they would make as good a parents and straight couples no reason why they shouldnt i suppose, but as gay couple arnt the norm to me so would like to think every child was going to a male/female, mum and dad situation/up bringing, you say you were joking about not before you but this actually crossing your mind makes me think that if a gay couple did get one before you, you would feel a little put out, i would.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

i don't think straight couples should get priority over gay couples.

That straight couple could end up being useless parents or could wind up being alcoholics or anything so I think it would be horrid that a gay couple who actually would make better parents for the child would be knocked back purely because of the gender of their partner.

sexuality should have nothing to do with the decision as to whether the couple can adopt or not, it should be all about their ability as parents.

If I wanted to adopt a child and it ended up going to a gay couple instead I wouldn't feel upset because some gay people got the child. I'd feel upset that I didn't get the child but wouldn't be annoyed specificaly because it went to someone who was gay.

some folk on here need to start finding their way out of the dark ages I think :thumbup:


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> some folk on here need to start finding their way out of the dark ages I think :thumbup:


That arrogant comment shows that if you dont agree with what others do your labeled, I will choose to agree or accept whatever the f*ck I want and peeps like you need to get over that and stop assuming that we arent up to date with things, theres a diff ya know between accepting something that is plain disgusting to someone else and been in the twentieth century


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> i don't think straight couples should get priority over gay couples.
> 
> That straight couple could end up being useless parents or could wind up being alcoholics or anything so I think it would be horrid that a gay couple who actually would make better parents for the child would be knocked back purely because of the gender of their partner.
> 
> ...


I agree! Who cares whether a couple wanting to adopt a child is gay or straight! What should matter is that they can provide a loving stable, safe home for that child

There was a lovely story on This Morning yesterday where a gay couple had fostered two little boys. They were going through the adoption process I think. It was clear that they had so much love to give, and if person has all that love to give then why not give it to a child who needs that stability....


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## piggybaker (Feb 10, 2009)

Bexy said:


> Absolutely not but would have a problem with them staying over with bigots.


Whats a bigot,,, because i thought that stood for someone who has strong opions and will not budge or accept other opions???:confused1: I didn't think it was a word used for gay people.. because they are really nice most of the time and excepting of all. well those i have met


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Waterlily said:


> well I prolly should back outta this thread cos I am getting umm a lil well honest  But I will clarify I meant I wasnt open with overly ***** types like in ya face gay not normal people who happen to prefer same sex relationships in private same as I dont like straight peeps shoving there sluttiness in my face if that makes sense.
> As for kids well I dont think they should have equal waiting times I think a man/woman relationship ought to get priority over same sex only because it well isnt natural.


I absolutely agree about hating people snogging each others faces off in public whether hetrosexual or gay/lesbian as it p**es me off seeing it.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> Depending on age and understanding maybe, i dont know, this is a hard one for me my first instinct is no i wouldnt like to see them adopt, but ime sure as individuals they would make as good a parents and straight couples no reason why they shouldnt i suppose, but as gay couple arnt the norm to me so would like to think every child was going to a male/female, mum and dad situation/up bringing, you say you were joking about not before you but this actually crossing your mind makes me think that if a gay couple did get one before you, you would feel a little put out, i would.[/QUOTE]
> 
> I would be immensley p___ed off if anyone got a kiddie before us regardless of their circumstance really.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> i don't think straight couples should get priority over gay couples.
> 
> That straight couple could end up being useless parents or could wind up being alcoholics or anything so I think it would be horrid that a gay couple who actually would make better parents for the child would be knocked back purely because of the gender of their partner.
> 
> ...


In any other situation I would feel like that but as we are so desperate and lets face it we all feel we are the best, I hope we would make great parents and true it is just a jealous instinct that made me put that comment. Unselfishly we would want every child to get the best parents they could - that is us.. that is a joke guys btw, just with serious undertones.

Do wish there was an option to add several quotes to one reply rather than having to do individual ones:frown:


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> Now so if someone is not open to there child witnessing an unatural relationship (yes it IS unnatural just because y'all now do it dont mean its how it was sposed to be  That makes THEM a bigot? get real ffs The word homophobe itself is a made up bullying tactic to try to FORCE people to accept that lifestyle in others OR be labelled "bigots" How dare you even call someone that because they wont accept your unnatural way of life.
> If I pisssed on my neighbours door step and then called her a pissaphobe cos she didnt like it would that have been a natural thing to do ? nope but its just as ludicrous as been labelled a homophobe for been anti something NOT moral or natural.


I don't understand how you can call same-sex relationships either unnatural or immoral. What is unnatural about it? Your sexual orientation is decreed by your hormones - are you saying they are not natural substances?  What is immoral about two people in love having a sexual relationship with each other? 

Leaving aside all "labels" such as "homophobe" and even "gay" - amongst all the dreadful things happening in the world, how can a couple who love each other and are in a steady relationship possibly be either immoral or unnatural, no matter what their sexual orientation?


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

JohnMorris said:


> In any other situation I would feel like that but as we are so desperate and lets face it we all feel we are the best, I hope we would make great parents and true it is just a jealous instinct that made me put that comment. Unselfishly we would want every child to get the best parents they could - that is us.. that is a joke guys btw, just with serious undertones.
> 
> *Do wish there was an option to add several quotes to one reply rather than having to do individual ones*:frown:


You can, press the little button with the speech marks on next to the 'quote button' - you click it for each post you want to quote and then press 'post reply' and it should work 

I can understand that you would feel that way because it must be totally different when you are actually going through the process and I may even feel the same if I was going through it but was just saying what I thought  I realise that everyone is different though and that when you're actually going through it for real, then many people will have very different views/feelings.


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## MissBethM (Aug 25, 2010)

I don't have children (if you exclude the feline variety ) but really do not think I would have any problem with this, surely the sex of the couple shouldn't matter? What would matter to me would be their nature and past conduct etc


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Hadn't noticed thosse so cheers might try that out later.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Spellweaver said:


> I don't understand how you can call same-sex relationships either unnatural or immoral. What is unnatural about it? Your sexual orientation is decreed by your hormones - are you saying they are not natural substances?  What is immoral about two people in love having a sexual relationship with each other?


Well if it was intended there we would all have the same sex organs  Just because someone wants to have sex with someone or something dont make it natural some people feel the need to screw animals that dont mean its right. 
As for two peeps having sex because they love each other then thats cool like I already stated my problem was not with gays but with poofters who are in your face there IS a diff. And the only reason I got my back up in this "honest" thread was because as soon as someone disagreed in here then about three posters straight after were all "shocked" well imo we all have a damn bloody right to be either for or against whether someone else likes it or not.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

I think if more people were honest the poll would look very different, there will be so many that have read this and not wanted to say what they really think so for us minority in this poll i for certain dont feel like ime in the minority.

I f people really think about it and wether you agree that its perfectly normal to be gay or not you have to think its not the norm to want same sex,sex and if people could just see through the p.c country we have now become many of you will have grown up with this and to a point have been brainwashed into thinking that anything that isnt p.c correct you have got to be wrong and instinctively jump the other way. Be honest and go with what you believe or feel isnt quite how you feel or see things thats what i believe.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> Well if it was intended there we would all have the same sex organs  Just because someone wants to have sex with someone or something dont make it natural some people feel the need to screw animals that dont mean its right.
> As for two peeps having sex because they love each other then thats cool like I already stated my problem was not with gays but with poofters who are in your face there IS a diff. And the only reason I got my back up in this "honest" thread was because as soon as someone disagreed in here then about three posters straight after were all "shocked" well imo we all have a damn bloody right to be either for or against whether someone else likes it or not.


I dont think anyone is shocked that you disagree with it, i'm not because that's up to you and you're entitled to disagree with it all you like but the only thing that I was 'shocked' by is the words you use to describe them, e.g. "rug munchers" "c*ck suckers" and "poofters" ...........not very nice really, is it? There's no need to start name calling. I'm sure you could have said "in your face gays" without needing to resort to namecalling, we all understand what you mean


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> I dont think anyone is shocked that you disagree with it, i'm not because that's up to you and you're entitled to disagree with it all you like but the only thing that I was 'shocked' by is the words you use to describe them, e.g. "rug munchers" "c*ck suckers" and "poofters" ...........not very nice really, is it? There's no need to start name calling. I'm sure you could have said "in your face gays" without needing to resort to namecalling, we all understand what you mean


well unfortunately for you I wasnt referring to me I was referring to a poster pages before I even posted  I personally couldnt give a toss if you were shocked at my response I just was appalled that people could gang up on someone here because he didnt agree with them.  As for my wording, well they are *words* get over it.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> I don't understand how you can call same-sex relationships either unnatural or immoral. What is unnatural about it? Your sexual orientation is decreed by your hormones - are you saying they are not natural substances?  What is immoral about two people in love having a sexual relationship with each other?
> 
> Leaving aside all "labels" such as "homophobe" and even "gay" - amongst all the dreadful things happening in the world, how can a couple who love each other and are in a steady relationship possibly be either immoral or unnatural, no matter what their sexual orientation?


Your sexual orientation is decreed by your hormones you say, absolutely correct, but there is something that causes the balance not to be right then we are gay (simple terms) althought that cant be helped doesnt make it narmal or natural, many things go wrong dont happen the way it should ok it doesnt nessessarily make it wrong, but it makes things un-natural and that isnt a sneer on anyone with a birth defect of any shape or form, but what it is, is that things havnt happened as it NORMALLY/ would should.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> well unfortunately for you I wasnt referring to me I was referring to a poster pages before I even posted  I personally couldnt give a toss if you were shocked at my response I just was appalled that people could gang up on someone here because he didnt agree with them.  As for my wording, well they are *words* get over it.





Waterlily said:


> well yeah I dont have a prob with gays just poofs.





Waterlily said:


> Nope I feel the same about rug munchers as I do about co*k suckers


doesn't look like you're 'referring' to anyone to me.

And yes they are words, well done  you might not be aware of this but there are some words that are just not needed, i'm sure if a member came on here using racist words then they would be banned, don't see the difference between racist and homophobic (sorry i know you dont believe in that but I and the majority of society do...... get over it!!) comments made by members, just as rude and nasty imo


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> doesn't look like you're 'referring' to anyone to me.
> 
> And yes they are words, well done  you might not be aware of this but there are some words that are just not needed, i'm sure if a member came on here using racist words then they would be banned, don't see the difference between racist and homophobic (sorry i know you dont believe in that but I and the majority of society do...... get over it!!) comments made by members, just as rude and nasty imo


okaaay just for the slow ones scroll back a few pages and ya will see I was referring to others been shocked mate 
Your post didnt even hit my radar for me to notice you been offended sorry.


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> Well if it was intended there we would all have the same sex organs  Just because someone wants to have sex with someone or something dont make it natural some people feel the need to screw animals that dont mean its right.
> As for two peeps having sex because they love each other then thats cool like I already stated my problem was not with gays but with poofters who are in your face there IS a diff. And the only reason I got my back up in this "honest" thread was because as soon as someone disagreed in here then about three posters straight after were all "shocked" well imo we all have a damn bloody right to be either for or against whether someone else likes it or not.


Well, as I was one of the posters you mention above who was shocked, let me tell you what I was shocked about. It wasn't because someone was expressing their opinion - I agree with you that everyone has a right to their own opinion and a right to express it on here. What shocked me about that particular post was the the poster was prepared to accept gay people only if they did not express their sexuality overtly. To me, that's a bit like saying you don't mind someone is ginger as long as they dye their hair.

In the same way, your choice of derogatory terms has shocked me - just as it would if someone called a coloured person a n----- It has nothing to do with the fact that I don't agree with your opinion - it's just that they are terms I find offensive and that I rarely come across in this day and age.

In fact none of this has anything to do with being shocked because someone has a different opinion. Haeveymolly, for example, has expressed an opinion that is different to most posters on here - but she has done it in a sensitive and caring way and comes across as entirely genuine. I can't speak for everyone but she certainly has not shocked me and I can understand and sympathise with her views. If anything, I am more inclined to listen and think about the views of someone who posts in this way, than listen to the views of someone who goes for the cheap shock factor.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Spellweaver said:


> What shocked me about that particular post was the the poster was prepared to accept gay people* only if they did not express their sexuality* *overtly*.
> 
> .


so he shocked you because he dont like them been over the top in his face ? well so what !!


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> okaaay just for the slow ones scroll back a few pages and ya will see I was referring to others been shocked mate
> Your post didnt even hit my radar for me to notice you been offended sorry.


probably because I wasn't offended love, never said I was.

I expect nothing less from some folk


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> Well, as I was one of the posters you mention above who was shocked, let me tell you what I was shocked about. It wasn't because someone was expressing their opinion - I agree with you that everyone has a right to their own opinion and a right to express it on here. What shocked me about that particular post was the the poster was prepared to accept gay people only if they did not express their sexuality overtly. To me, that's a bit like saying you don't mind someone is ginger as long as they dye their hair.
> 
> In the same way, your choice of derogatory terms has shocked me - just as it would if someone called a coloured person a n----- It has nothing to do with the fact that I don't agree with your opinion - it's just that they are terms I find offensive and that I rarely come across in this day and age.
> 
> In fact none of this has anything to do with being shocked because someone has a different opinion. Haeveymolly, for example, has expressed an opinion that is different to most posters on here - but she has done it in a sensitive and caring way and comes across as entirely genuine. I can't speak for everyone but she certainly has not shocked me and I can understand and sympathise with her views. If anything, I am more inclined to listen and think about the views of someone who posts in this way, than listen to the views of someone who goes for the cheap shock factor.


Rep coming your way - you worded it better than I ever could


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> Your sexual orientation is decreed by your hormones you say, absolutely correct, but there is something that causes the balance not to be right then we are gay (simple terms) althought that cant be helped doesnt make it narmal or natural, many things go wrong dont happen the way it should ok it doesnt nessessarily make it wrong, but it makes things un-natural and that isnt a sneer on anyone with a birth defect of any shape or form, but what it is, is that things havnt happened as it NORMALLY/ would should.


See, you always write things that make me think!  I understand what you are saying - but I think that when something happens to "make the balance not right" often enough then that in itself becomes a natural thing, if that makes sense!


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> so he shocked you because he dont like them been over the top in his face ? well so what !!


Hey, to me that is shocking and, to use your own argument back at you - I have the right to post to say that I find something shocking!


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> See, you always write things that make me think!  I understand what you are saying - but I think that when something happens to "make the balance not right" often enough then that in itself becomes a natural thing, if that makes sense!


Like to get people thinking i know what you are saying but it then makes it "natural/normal" for "them" does'ne make it normal, gays do not upset many,many people and i wouldnt say they upset me, but its normal for 2 people of opposite sex with the different sex organs, to have sex, a sexual relationship, thats why we were made that way.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Spellweaver said:


> Hey, to me that is shocking and, to use your own argument back at you - I have the right to post to say that I find something shocking!


well duh but on a thread that ASKS for honesty, you need to be expecting diff opinions not be dramatically shocked or else that is like saying you expected all the opinions posted to be like yours and not there honest answers.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> well duh but on a thread that ASKS for honesty, you need to be expecting diff opinions not be dramatically shocked or else that is like saying you expected all the opinions posted to be like yours and not there honest answers.


well then perhaps you need to be expecting people do be disagreeing with you too then? I'm sure you knew as you were expressing your opinion that you'd probably be in a minority.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

I honestly feel that if this subject had been brought up years ago before all this bloody political correctness that has brainwashed soooo many people not just this subject but many things we hear about nowadays, then your views would be very different, age is a factor here, the young people have been brought up in this nanny state of p.c rubbish, no one seems to have their own minds anymore, and for them that are sure they have their own minds in some subjects i bet to differ, they think they have because the world they have been brought up and grown up in has brainwashed them, they will want us like robots soon where they can programme in what we have to say, think and believe.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> well then perhaps you need to be expecting people do be disagreeing with you too then? I'm sure you knew as you were expressing your opinion that you'd probably be in a minority.


Oh disagree all you want I dont care, I am only saying that others here needed to accept that too if you re read from my first post. And I am not the minority mate I am just one of the few to not be scared to say the truth about how I feel in the open boards.


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> well duh but on a thread that ASKS for honesty, you need to be expecting diff opinions not be dramatically shocked or else that is like saying you expected all the opinions posted to be like yours and not there honest answers.


Well, to be honest, being gay is such a non-issue for me that I was indeed surprised to find attitudes like that of the poster who posted about gays mincing. I think we all tend to judge people on our own standards, and by my standards being gay is a natural state of affairs, so I was suprised to find other archaic attitudes were still around. But what *shocked* me was not the opinion expressed, but the fact that a poster could imagine the use of such derogatory terms would be acceptable. Although I have to say - by some of the terms that came later (and from you  ), it was pretty mild!


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> I honestly feel that if this subject had been brought up years ago before all this bloody political correctness that has brainwashed soooo many people not just this subject but many things we hear about nowadays, then your views would be very different, age is a factor here, the young people have been brought up in this nanny state of p.c rubbish, no one seems to have their own minds anymore, and for them that are sure they have their own minds in some subjects i bet to differ, they think they have because the world they have been brought up and grown up in has brainwashed them, they will want us like robots soon where they can programme in what we have to say, think and believe.


so just because i'm only 20 years old, I don't have a problem with gay people purely because i've been brainwashed? I know there is a lot of the PC brigade about these days and much of it is just silly (like the whole health and safety gone mad thing) but i'd much rather people such as gays were protected nowadays rather than being stuck in the past in a world where most of them were too frightened to tell people or had to worry about being stoned or beaten or drowned on a daily basis.

I do have my own mind and my own opinions and to know that someone thinks that I have these views because i've been 'brainwashed' is very sad. I think most young people these days are much more switched on to the world than our elders think we are........ yes there's stupid folk about and young people (like the jeremy kyle folk) who don't have a clue but I think to try and tar us all with the same brush is a bit demeaning for those of us like me who spend a lot of time thinking over things like that and making my own decisions and views....... had I been brainwashed i'd be saying that all these immigrants deserve a good job and a place in our country but do i heck, I think they should bog off back to where they came from unless they really do have something to offer and can make a fair living and pay their way


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> Well, to be honest, being gay is such a non-issue for me that I was indeed surprised to find attitudes like that of the poster who posted about gays mincing. I think we all tend to judge people on our own standards, and by my standards being gay is a natural state of affairs, so I was suprised to find other archaic attitudes were still around. But what *shocked* me was not the opinion expressed, but the fact that a poster could imagine the use of such derogatory terms would be acceptable. Although I have to say - by some of the terms that came later (and from you  ), it was pretty mild!


But it isnt a natural state, its something homonal that went wrong which makes a person gay, no fault of anyones but it isnt natural.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Verbatim said:


> so just because i'm only 20 years old, I don't have a problem with gay people purely because i've been brainwashed? I know there is a lot of the PC brigade about these days and much of it is just silly (like the whole health and safety gone mad thing) but i'd much rather people such as gays were protected nowadays rather than being stuck in the past in a world where most of them were too frightened to tell people or had to worry about being stoned or beaten or drowned on a daily basis.
> 
> I do have my own mind and my own opinions and to know that someone thinks that I have these views because i've been 'brainwashed' is very sad. I think most young people these days are much more switched on to the world than our elders think we are........ yes there's stupid folk about and young people (like the jeremy kyle folk) who don't have a clue but I think to try and tar us all with the same brush is a bit demeaning for those of us like me who spend a lot of time thinking over things like that and making my own decisions and views....... had I been brainwashed i'd be saying that all these immigrants deserve a good job and a place in our country but do i heck, I think they should bog off back to where they came from unless they really do have something to offer and can make a fair living and pay their way


I had no idea how old you were or any members on here as a matter of fact but i can guess the ones that are saying to be gay is normal and natural would be young/younger people because they have been brought up in a world of p,c correctness not all and if thats not you then good for you but many have been. I have a son your age and ime not ancient or in the dark ages as some think and he like you say you have has is own mind so does my eldest of 23 because i have brought them up to have their own minds, some dont have that parenting.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> Oh disagree all you want I dont care, I am only saying that others here needed to accept that too if you re read from my first post. And I am not the minority mate I am just one of the few to not be scared to say the truth about how I feel in the open boards.


okay then since you obviously seem to know that the poll is wrong then please can you tell me how many people have voted with dishonesty and which option they clearly wanted to pick or what their real views are?

Don't you try and tell me that people don't really agree with what they've voted or what they've said because you simply can't. I think the vast majority of people on this forum have the balls to say what they think and I think the vast majority of us are grown up enough to accept that. (until members start using horrid terms that is)

sure there probably will be a few who haven't voiced their opinions to the full extent but i think if people didn't agree, they'd say they didn't agree.


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## Pug_D (Feb 21, 2010)

It wouldn't bother me AT ALL.

Just because they are gay doesn't mean they would be kissing or anyting more in front of a child!!

if a straight couple did that I would be just as shocked and angry!


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> I honestly feel that if this subject had been brought up years ago before all this bloody political correctness that has brainwashed soooo many people not just this subject but many things we hear about nowadays, then your views would be very different, age is a factor here, the young people have been brought up in this nanny state of p.c rubbish, no one seems to have their own minds anymore, and for them that are sure they have their own minds in some subjects i bet to differ, they think they have because the world they have been brought up and grown up in has brainwashed them, they will want us like robots soon where they can programme in what we have to say, think and believe.


Heh heh - it's a long while since I've been called young (please please don't tell me if you didn't mean me!  ) But I'm 55 and I certainly know my own mind!

I think you are right to a certain degree - if this message board could be whisked back in time to 30 years ago, I'm sure I would find myself in a minority rather than a majority. However, as the years have passed we have gained knowledge and insight into all sorts of areas, including sexual orientation and same-sex relationships. Young people have been certainly been brought up to have more tolerance and acceptance - but I think that is a good thing rather than a bad thing. I don't think it's a case of not knowing their own minds - I think it's more a case of being given more knowledge and being able to come to a more all-encompassing decision about what they feel is right and wrong.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Verbatim said:


> okay then since you obviously seem to know that the poll is wrong then please can you tell me how many people have voted with dishonesty and which option they clearly wanted to pick or what their real views are?
> 
> Don't you try and tell me that people don't really agree with what they've voted or what they've said because you simply can't. I think the vast majority of people on this forum have the balls to say what they think and I think the vast majority of us are grown up enough to accept that. (until members start using horrid terms that is)
> 
> sure there probably will be a few who haven't voiced their opinions to the full extent but i think if people didn't agree, they'd say they didn't agree.


Mmmmm ime not so sure on that one.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Spellweaver said:


> Well, to be honest, being gay is such a non-issue for me that I was indeed surprised to find attitudes like that of the poster who posted about gays mincing. I think we all tend to judge people on our own standards, and by my standards being gay is a natural state of affairs, so I was suprised to find other archaic attitudes were still around. But what *shocked* me was not the opinion expressed, but the fact that a poster could imagine the use of such derogatory terms would be acceptable. Although I have to say - by some of the terms that came later (and from you  ), it was pretty mild!


well we all have had diff up bringings and life experiences so therefore diff sayings and diff things that offend, to me those words I used werent said in hatred its how I speak and those around me know this including my cross dressing and gay friends. In hindsight I would have used a diff term had I thought about it BUT I didnt and its tough really because its me and my way. I wont be apologising for that at all because it wasnt said with nasty motives. I know we all disagree and thats great because I would hate to be a clone of someone else I have my own mind as you have yours, I dont get shocked at others lifestyles I just choose to accept or not which is my right and also my right to not be labelled a bigot or homophobe because of it. I will add too that just because I have my own views does not mean I treat people different, I keep my feelings to myself around them unless like in this case I am asked for the truth.


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

Verbatim said:


> so just because i'm only 20 years old, I don't have a problem with gay people purely because i've been brainwashed? I know there is a lot of the PC brigade about these days and much of it is just silly (like the whole health and safety gone mad thing) but i'd much rather people such as gays were protected nowadays rather than being stuck in the past in a world where most of them were too frightened to tell people or had to worry about being stoned or beaten or drowned on a daily basis.
> 
> I do have my own mind and my own opinions and to know that someone thinks that I have these views because i've been 'brainwashed' is very sad. I think most young people these days are much more switched on to the world than our elders think we are........ yes there's stupid folk about and young people (like the jeremy kyle folk) who don't have a clue but I think to try and tar us all with the same brush is a bit demeaning for those of us like me who spend a lot of time thinking over things like that and making my own decisions and views....... had I been brainwashed i'd be saying that all these immigrants deserve a good job and a place in our country but do i heck, I think they should bog off back to where they came from unless they really do have something to offer and can make a fair living and pay their way


I agree with this, Ive not been brainwashed tho do you think they could brain wash my brother into being my servant :001_cool:


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> But it isnt a natural state, its something homonal that went wrong which makes a person gay, no fault of anyones but it isnt natural.


We'll have to agree to disagree on this one hun - my take on it is that if mother nature has given someone the hormones that makes them find the same sex attractive, then it's come from nature and it is therefore natural. It is not usual, but it is perfectly natural.


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> Heh heh - it's a long while since I've been called young (please please don't tell me if you didn't mean me!  ) But I'm 55 and I certainly know my own mind!
> 
> I think you are right to a certain degree - if this message board could be whisked back in time to 30 years ago, I'm sure I would find myself in a minority rather than a majority. However, as the years have passed we have gained knowledge and insight into all sorts of areas, including sexual orientation and same-sex relationships. Young people have been certainly been brought up to have more tolerance and acceptance - but I think that is a good thing rather than a bad thing. I don't think it's a case of not knowing their own minds - I think it's more a case of being given more knowledge and being able to come to a more all-encompassing decision about what they feel is right and wrong.


I actually had no idea on anyones age thb, and yes people are more accepting nowadays and if i had been much older i might not be as accepting and its not really the accepting i disagree with its how people are trying to say its "normal" thats surely the brainwashing it can never be said its normal why were we made like we are it simple something went wrong which makes whatever went wrong "abnormal" whatever we would be discussing.It can never, ever be said that having "sex" with your own "sex" is normal, now come on.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> Mmmmm ime not so sure on that one.


well I for one have already had one pm in agreement


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

haeveymolly said:


> I honestly feel that if this subject had been brought up years ago before all this bloody political correctness that has brainwashed soooo many people not just this subject but many things we hear about nowadays, then your views would be very different, age is a factor here, the young people have been brought up in this nanny state of p.c rubbish, no one seems to have their own minds anymore, and for them that are sure they have their own minds in some subjects i bet to differ, they think they have because the world they have been brought up and grown up in has brainwashed them, they will want us like robots soon where they can programme in what we have to say, think and believe.


Exactly what my rambling was trying to express, you said it with all the right words :thumbup:


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> well we all have had diff up bringings and life experiences so therefore diff sayings and diff things that offend, to me those words I used werent said in hatred its how I speak and those around me know this including my cross dressing and gay friends. In hindsight I would have used a diff term had I thought about it BUT I didnt and its tough really because its me and my way. I wont be apologising for that at all because it wasnt said with nasty motives. I know we all disagree and thats great because I would hate to be a clone of someone else I have my own mind as you have yours, I dont get shocked at others lifestyles I just choose to accept or not which is my right and also my right to not be labelled a bigot or homophobe because of it. I will add too that just because I have my own views does not mean I treat people different, I keep my feelings to myself around them unless like in this case I am asked for the truth.


Come now everyone who could disagree or say there is anything wrong with this quoted post.
QUITE RIGHT:thumbup::thumbup:


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Spellweaver said:


> We'll have to agree to disagree on this one hun - my take on it is that if mother nature has given someone the hormones that makes them find the same sex attractive, then it's come from nature and it is therefore natural. It is not usual, but it is perfectly natural.


Sorry dont get it, cant see that view at all. Lets look it up shall we and see


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## Miss.PuddyCat (Jul 13, 2009)

I always thought of someone being gay as normal, I dont understand how its not :confused1: To me its just your chemicals are acting different and you find the same sex attractive. It sounds natural to me.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Each to their own. Honest replies were requested and I wouldn't have given anything less. I respect that others have different views although think I may not have worded it very well in a previous post on this thread. We are all different and therefore unique - views and opinions too. Whilst I may not agree with what some people have written, WaterLily for one, I respect their views and hope they respect mine in return.


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## JohnMorris (Oct 15, 2010)

Miss.PuddyCat said:


> I always thought of someone being gay as normal, I dont understand how its not :confused1: To me its just your chemicals are acting different and you find the same sex attractive. It sounds natural to me.


Nailed it!


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

JohnMorris said:


> Each to their own. Honest replies were requested and I wouldn't have given anything less. I respect that others have different views although think I may not have worded it very well in a previous post on this thread. We are all different and therefore unique - views and opinions too. Whilst I may not agree with what some people have written, WaterLily for one, I respect their views and hope they respect mine in return.


And its that attitude I respect, been able to agree to disagree without feeling like an explanation or a label is needed.


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## Tigerneko (Jan 2, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> I actually had no idea on anyones age thb, and yes people are more accepting nowadays and if i had been much older i might not be as accepting and its not really the accepting i disagree with its how people are trying to say its "normal" thats surely the brainwashing it can never be said its normal why were we made like we are it simple something went wrong which makes whatever went wrong "abnormal" whatever we would be discussing.It can never, ever be said that having "sex" with your own "sex" is normal, now come on.


it depends what you define as 'normal'. i'm sure to a gay person, having sex with someone of their gender is normal to them.

People think i'm not 'normal' because i've got a lot of pets but i'm sure to many of us on here who have been brought up around animals all our lives, it is totally normal to have pets, to the point that some people can't imagine their lives without them. Everyone has a different version of what normal is and me personally growing up around a lot of gay people, I consider gay people normal for me. For others it might not be normal but imo you can't say that your version of normal is the correct one 



Waterlily said:


> well I for one have already had one pm in agreement


say things about me or my posts behind my back all you like.......would be nice if you voiced it to me though or are you not that brave? Come on I can take a bit of criticism now and then :thumbup: and that goes for anyone else who has anything to say about me, i'd be interested to know :thumbup:

now if you will excuse me I have places to go and people to see, I will be back later if the threads still going :thumbup:


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Verbatim said:


> it depends what you define as 'normal'. i'm sure to a gay person, having sex with someone of their gender is normal to them.
> 
> People think i'm not 'normal' because i've got a lot of pets but i'm sure to many of us on here who have been brought up around animals all our lives, it is totally normal to have pets, to the point that some people can't imagine their lives without them. Everyone has a different version of what normal is and me personally growing up around a lot of gay people, I consider gay people normal for me. For others it might not be normal but imo you can't say that your version of normal is the correct one
> 
> ...


WTF are you on about :scared: how the f*ck is my pm about you  the world dont revolve around you buddy sorry to burst ya bubble an all, my pm was in agreement with my views not about you OR anyone at all :lol:


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

haeveymolly said:


> I actually had no idea on anyones age thb, and yes people are more accepting nowadays and if i had been much older i might not be as accepting and its not really the accepting i disagree with its how people are trying to say its "normal" thats surely the brainwashing it can never be said its normal why were we made like we are it simple something went wrong which makes whatever went wrong "abnormal" whatever we would be discussing.It can never, ever be said that having "sex" with your own "sex" is normal, now come on.


Nope, we will deffo have to agree to disagree. I don't think (!) I've been brainwashed - I've held similar opinons since before "PC" was ever invented. For me, as I said before, if nature gave you the hormones that attract you to you own sex, then it is natural. As for "normal" - well, normal is a relative concept. If you go to a sleepy English village and ask "is having a same-sex relationship normal" your answer would be no. If you go to Canal Street in Manchester and ask the same question you'll get a resounding yes.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Miss.PuddyCat said:


> I always thought of someone being gay as normal, I dont understand how its not :confused1: To me its just your chemicals are acting different and you find the same sex attractive. It sounds natural to me.


nope sorry the whole biological function of sex is to procreate Since it is IMPOSSIBLE for same sex partners to do this, how could that EVER be misconstrued as NORMAL..were the whole of the species to be "normal" in
their sense, we'd die out.


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> nope sorry the whole biological function of sex is to procreate Since it is IMPOSSIBLE for same sex partners to do this, how could that EVER be misconstrued as NORMAL..were the whole of the species to be "normal" in
> their sense, we'd die out.


Really? read this:

Envisioning a World Without Men - ABC News


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## bullet (Jan 25, 2009)

I think this is where this thread is goingYouTube - Matt Munro The Windmills Of Your Mind:blink:


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## Cat_Crazy (Jul 15, 2009)

Right as I said earlier this thread has got WAY too heated and I am pm'ing a mod to close it as it was not the intention at all.

Like I said I am gay so STRONGLY disagree with some views but at the same time I respect your choice to have that view.

I don't need someone else's approval as to how I live my life and i'm thick skinned enough to not care what someone thinks of me.

I did specifically ask for honest opinions and so I respect the fact that people are being honest, I think some people are wrong in their views as you may think I am wrong in mine, that's life we don't always agree and think the same thing, so what!

I would like to point out that in response to the person saying if they pissed on someone's lawn and they didn't like it would it make them a pissaphobe.

The difference there is CHOICE.

You choose to do that, being gay is not a choice.

I think it's very wrong to dislike someone for something beyond their control, such as skin colour, sex, diasbility or sexuality but if you don't like it it's no skin of my nose and that's your own choice.

Also in terms of gay adoption, why should any child sit in the care system without a family because gay adoption is not allowed. If they are good loving people why should sexuality make a difference?

That's like saying black people can't adopt.

EVERYONE has the right to a family.

Anyway that's all I will say on the subject now.

Once again thank you everyone for your views, that was the whole point of the thread. To get DIFFERENT views on the subject.

I respect people for being honest and sharing their opinions and am truely not offended by any remarks at all. Like I said it's my life and I don't need your permission to live it.

I am sorry it's ended it such a heated debate and having to be closed however.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

Spellweaver said:


> Really? read this:
> 
> Envisioning a World Without Men - ABC News


science dont make something natural just easier


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## Spellweaver (Jul 17, 2009)

Waterlily said:


> science dont make something natural just easier


Taint about science hun - it's about the Y chromosome dying out naturally and how nature is coping, and how other life forms on earth procreate without opposite-sex union.


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

The OP has got her answers and its going in circles now so it will be closed....Jill


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