# will a kitten become a lap cat or be shy?



## martp (Apr 15, 2008)

Hi all,

I know this might not be an easy thing to determine but my other half is worried the Bengal cross kitten we are getting soon might not be very sociable with people. She's hoping to have a lapcat that'll sit on her lap in the evenings and can be picked up and cuddled etc. The kitten at the moment (8 weeks) seems a bit shy and might run away at first although will start happily playing after a little while. Is it the wild nature of a Bengal cross that it'll be less likely to be like a regular moggie type cat?
Can Bengals or Bengal crosses be the sort that'll be happy to curl up on your lap and be picked up? Can this type of behaviour be influenced at this stage or will the cats personality be quite independent of how it is handled now?
Any thoughts or advice much appreciated. It will be an only cat as the other kittens in the litter were all taken...
It'll also be a house cat and my other half is at home all day to be with it and play with it etc.


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## silverhorse (Nov 2, 2008)

martp said:


> Hi all,
> 
> I know this might not be an easy thing to determine but my other half is worried the Bengal cross kitten we are getting soon might not be very sociable with people. She's hoping to have a lapcat that'll sit on her lap in the evenings and can be picked up and cuddled etc. The kitten at the moment (8 weeks) seems a bit shy and might run away at first although will start happily playing after a little while. Is it the wild nature of a Bengal cross that it'll be less likely to be like a regular moggie type cat?
> Can Bengals or Bengal crosses be the sort that'll be happy to curl up on your lap and be picked up? Can this type of behaviour be influenced at this stage or will the cats personality be quite independent of how it is handled now?
> ...


It is difficult to predict. My daughter has two kittens from the same litter. One is a lapcat and the other does not want to sit on her lap for any length of time at all. It is a personality thing but in some breeds some cats are more likely to cuddle up than others.


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## The Twins (Oct 11, 2009)

martp said:


> Hi all,
> 
> I know this might not be an easy thing to determine but my other half is worried the Bengal cross kitten we are getting soon might not be very sociable with people. She's hoping to have a lapcat that'll sit on her lap in the evenings and can be picked up and cuddled etc. The kitten at the moment (8 weeks) seems a bit shy and might run away at first although will start happily playing after a little while. Is it the wild nature of a Bengal cross that it'll be less likely to be like a regular moggie type cat?
> Can Bengals or Bengal crosses be the sort that'll be happy to curl up on your lap and be picked up? Can this type of behaviour be influenced at this stage or will the cats personality be quite independent of how it is handled now?
> ...


Certain breeds are more likely to be lapcats than other breeds.

But my two BSH crosses, they both are lap cats - they both try to fit on my lap at once (they're now 8 months old) but i think this is because we handled them alot and they slept on my lap the first day they came to us and did thereon.

Let them come to you but when they do want some fuss make sure you give them plenty and pick them up and cuddle them alot. I pick my two up every morning for a once over check to make sure they're ok and give them kisses and hugs etc! And then again when i get home from work. Not only is it good for bonding it is also good cos you get to know how they feel - weight, muscle tone, any lumps and bumps etc...


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## martp (Apr 15, 2008)

Many thanks for the replies everyone.
We went to see the three kittens again on Monday and ours tended to run away and hide under the table, the other two seemed a bit more confident. Also when handled ours seemed very interested in everything happening around it and anxious to get away and did scratch as well. Its sister was quite relaxed about being held and had her claws retracted. Ours couldn't really be held for a minute without wanting to run off.
She is very playful though and will come running out if a toy is waved around but although could be stroked didn't seem to enjoy and would walk away. We're going to persevere though. It'll be an only cat and a housecat as mentioned and my fiancee is at home all day and is going to dedicate a lot of time and attention to the kitten.
Out of the 3 kittens ours loves climbing more and seems more active and chases toys more than the others.
We will see how things go...


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## lemonpie (Jan 16, 2010)

martp said:


> Many thanks for the replies everyone.
> We went to see the three kittens again on Monday and ours tended to run away and hide under the table, the other two seemed a bit more confident. Also when handled ours seemed very interested in everything happening around it and anxious to get away and did scratch as well. Its sister was quite relaxed about being held and had her claws retracted. Ours couldn't really be held for a minute without wanting to run off.
> She is very playful though and will come running out if a toy is waved around but although could be stroked didn't seem to enjoy and would walk away. We're going to persevere though. It'll be an only cat and a housecat as mentioned and my fiancee is at home all day and is going to dedicate a lot of time and attention to the kitten.
> Out of the 3 kittens ours loves climbing more and seems more active and chases toys more than the others.
> We will see how things go...


When I visited one of my kittens at 8 weeks she wasn't all that interested in me unless I had a toy.. Definitely did not want to be held and would tolerate stroking for a few seconds before wandering off.

I visited again 2 weeks later and it was the same. But then, the day I went to pick her up at 13 weeks she came over and sat on my lap 

I thought she would be the skittish one of my two kittens but she was super confident when brought into my home... Been here two weeks now, every so often she sits on my lap or near me and will usually stay there if I pick her up and put her next to me 

That's my success story, I would rather she wanted to be on my lap all the time but it's early days!


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## martp (Apr 15, 2008)

Thanks lemonpie, that's really reassuring to know. Ours is going to be ready to collect next Wednesday at 12 weeks old. We will certainly put a lot of effort in to make her feel happy and settled in her new home, already there are more things for a cat in the house than there is for humans!


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## Guest (Apr 28, 2010)

Neither of my cats like to be picked up although one will tolerate it, but they will both sit on my lap but only on their terms and conditions,but they love fusses and playing, but you can never tell how they will interact with you until they are in your home and used to you.


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## Kaitlyn (Apr 28, 2010)

Hope it all turns out well for you and your kitten 

Im looking to adopt a kitten soon (had the home check today) and would like one that will be a lap and cuddle kitty aswell. Reading this has given me a few ideas and some great advice :thumbup:


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## lemonpie (Jan 16, 2010)

martp said:


> Thanks lemonpie, that's really reassuring to know. Ours is going to be ready to collect next Wednesday at 12 weeks old. We will certainly put a lot of effort in to make her feel happy and settled in her new home, already there are more things for a cat in the house than there is for humans!


Good luck with your kitty  I'm sure being an only cat will help, our first arrival lost a significant amount of interest in the humans once kitty #2 was home.

We've all been downstairs watching tv quietly, Leela was sitting by my head so I sat her on my lap and she stayed there for at least half an hour snoozing.. until Indie came over and tried to suckle from her. Odd little dude


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## Loulabella1 (Nov 18, 2009)

I've got two 7 month old moggies (sisters) and they are totally different in personality. One is a total lap cat and the other one will sit as close to me as possible but never on my lap. Both treated the same, the lap cat seemed to be the dominant kitten so I think perhaps she "taught" the other one that she was the one who deserved my lap. Anyway both lovely and affectionate, the non-lap one goes mad for a fuss, is happily picked up, loves being brushed, it's just she wont sit on your lap. I love the fact they are both different and wouldn't change a single thing about them. Having said that I think I might be a little bit dissapointed if I only had the non-lap one as there is nothing nicer than the other kitten going to sleep on me for a evening in front of the tv!


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## lillylove (May 4, 2010)

Mine is super cuddly but also will be on her own and seems happy. 
Cats I have had in the past often will like to be touched but not always sit on you. My old cat used to happily lay next to you or by your feet. Which was good because he was huge and heavy!


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## martp (Apr 15, 2008)

I just thought I'd follow on to this thread now we have the kitten. She was very shy still the night we collected her but when we got her home after some exploring and coming out to play she fell asleep on my fiancee's lap.
Since the first day she has been a lot more comfortable with people walking around including visitors and loves to jump up on the settee and sit between us or on our laps.
I don't know whether it's just a kitten thing or if she will stay this friendly and affectionate as an adult cat. She's now 12 weeks old, we'll have to just hope she stays like this...


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## Tje (Jan 16, 2010)

put it this way, none of us can predict the future... but the signs are GREAT!!


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## lemonpie (Jan 16, 2010)

Hooray, I'm glad it's turning out well for you  If she was completely anti-lap you wouldn't have had such good progress I suspect.


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## lillylove (May 4, 2010)

Mine has started sleeping on my PILLOW and eating my hair while I am asleep. She then licks my face if I talk to her to get me to play with her. i move her down the bed quite a lot but she always creeps back up! 
She doesn't really sit on my lap much but I do not mind. She is still lovely to me. She has never even scratched me once, not even during play.


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