# Regret getting a puppy.



## Simbpup (Jul 23, 2014)

I got a puppy when he was 9 weeks old and he is now 14 weeks, and i am going insane, I dont eat or sleep, i've got a bad stomach felling about my puppy.

He is a great puppy, he house trained, and learned some of the basic command, but there is something wrong, i don't know what it is. It's like I can't handle the responsibility. I am afraid that if i return him that i would regret it for the rest of my life.

I have read that i will get easier... but when??. I am so stressed and depressed all the time, I don't feel its fair for the puppy to be with me. He should be with a family that will love him all the time.


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## Muze (Nov 30, 2011)

It's actually not uncommon to feel this way, you're whole life has changed for the next 15 years potentially, that's a big deal. 
On top of that, tired and stressed... it's understandable that you may feel overwhelmed. 

Sounds like things are actually going pretty well so far 

Could you try to just spend some time enjoying the pup? Maybe go on some group walks or classes where you can vent to other pup owners? 

Take care x


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## Dogless (Feb 26, 2010)

It sounds as if you are doing really well with your puppy - it can be a really stressful time though and lots of members on here have said that they almost gave a pup back so your feelings aren't uncommon.

Have you discussed any concerns with your pups breeder? What breed is he?


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## vickieb (Nov 22, 2010)

AWWWWWWW its ok.... I was exactly the same! EXACTLY the same...... actually hated the little fella for quite some time! 

I didnt realise how hard it would be! but i Promise you it will get better! so so much better. 

What breed is your pup some can be more high energy than others sometimes 

Stick it out... go on lovely walks..... teach him things.... try (even tho its hard) to be Positive.....

I had this a few weeks ago when we got the second pup, our Dog hasnt taken as well as i thought to it, and i was regretting it, but Im being positive and trying my best for them to get on together (after help on here the other day  ) 

all the best... and your not alone


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## Dimwit (Nov 10, 2011)

What is it specifically that he is doing that means you can't eat or sleep - or what specifically are you worrying about? (if you post more details then people may be able to offer some help or advice)

I know a lot of people post here about the "puppy blues" and although I never regretted getting my dog he was quite hard work as a puppy. It does get better, but it is quite difficult to put any timeline on it.


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## lostbear (May 29, 2013)

Sorry, but I have yo disagree with most posters. If you are still having problems in this "honeymoon" phase of dog ownership, I think you should take him back to the breeder while he is still young enough to adjust to a new home, and before he has picked up any really bad habits that a new owner would have to get rid of.

I know this will not be a popular post, but I think you should put your dog's happiness first. Perhaps in a couple of years you will be ready for a dog (maybe not a puppy), but I don't think you are now.


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## rottiepointerhouse (Feb 9, 2014)

As others have said its perfectly natural to think "what the heck have I done" pups/dogs in general are a huge responsibility but they are also life enriching and great fun. Thats why most of us keep on having them even when we try telling ourselves this will be the last one  Every time I take on a new dog I have a period of wishing I hadn't particularly pups who are pretty time consuming. However you sound like you have made a really good start. Try to focus on what you have achieved and think of all the great times you are going to have together in the future but also try to keep up with friends/family/other interests as your pup will be fine spending some time alone too.


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## Dogloverlou (Dec 8, 2013)

Totally normal feelings. I'm still in that frame of mind myself a little and I've had my puppy a good couple of months now. But it has become slightly easier. At first I was literally in tears, and felt guilty and selfish that I put my other two dogs through the stress of a new pup. I like the pup much better these days, although I still don't love him. So don't think you're abnormal or wrong for feeling these feelings towards your pup.

As others have said it sounds like you're doing really well. Have you got a good routine in place? I found that helps a lot initially. Have you joined a training class? 

What are the things you're struggling with the most?


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## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

lostbear said:


> Sorry, but I have yo disagree with most posters. If you are still having problems in this "honeymoon" phase of dog ownership, I think you should take him back to the breeder while he is still young enough to adjust to a new home, and before he has picked up any really bad habits that a new owner would have to get rid of.
> 
> I know this will not be a popular post, but I think you should put your dog's happiness first. Perhaps in a couple of years you will be ready for a dog (maybe not a puppy), but I don't think you are now.


I'm partly agreeing with this, and partly all the others. Puppy blues are a thing, but I have to question why the OP brought a puppy in the first place, what research they did and what kind of commitment they thought they were getting into. I was down and lacking sleep etc but due to my own research and the fact I knew I was getting into I was as prepared as I could be and didn't even think to ever give Kes away at any point in time.


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## JenKyzer (Jun 25, 2013)

Not much 'advice' from me other to add that it does get better, eventually

I really kicked myself at first for giving in to the OH and getting a pup, it was horrendous at first, i'd never been so drained and going to work felt great to have me time  As he got bigger and learnt new things we bonded and now he's a real, as they say, 'mummys boy'  I had to remember he was adjusting to us like we was to him.. he had no human interaction hardly in his first 6weeks, he had seen us but coming home 2 weeks before we planned wasn't ideal either. I can't remember how long it took for me to click with him as i barely remember the bad feelings and why it was 'so bad'.. as how he is now has kinda canceled it out  (Like when people say child birth is so painful and they'd never do it again, ever... then they're pregnant again within a year or 2 ) 

Hopefully, as other's have said, if you shed a bit more light onto whats worrying you then people can help you out and it won't be so bad  but don't feel bad for feeling this way, alot of us have been there  If he come from a breeder, they might be able to help too  

It sounds like your pup is doing really well, you should be proud  House trained in 4 weeks!! Jealous....  x


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## Britt (May 18, 2014)

Simbpup said:


> I got a puppy when he was 9 weeks old and he is now 14 weeks, and i am going insane, I dont eat or sleep, i've got a bad stomach felling about my puppy.
> 
> He is a great puppy, he house trained, and learned some of the basic command, but there is something wrong, i don't know what it is. It's like I can't handle the responsibility. I am afraid that if i return him that i would regret it for the rest of my life.
> 
> I have read that i will get easier... but when??. I am so stressed and depressed all the time, I don't feel its fair for the puppy to be with me. He should be with a family that will love him all the time.


Relax. I felt exactly the same after adopting my cat Pooh in April. I feel much better now that I got used to having him with me. I used to be depressed but this cat is the best thing that happened to me in years.

Don't return him. You will feel much more relaxed in a couple of months I promise.


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## Helbo (Sep 15, 2010)

Puppy Blues is natural - lack of sleep, your routine all out of whack, the worry and reality of raising a puppy, cleaning up mess, trying to communicate with your puppy, fitting in relaxing and fun times...I was in tears on and off for the first two weeks of owning my puppy! It is a big adjustment.

I doubted whether I would be able to eventually 'read' him and get to a routine we were both happy. And although I bonded with my puppy straight away, it wasn't until he was 6-9 months and toilet trained that I felt I could relax a bit.

*Puppy Blues is natural - but I never doubted that I wanted him. 
*

I think you need to sit down and really think whether this feeling is just because you're tired, or if you really don't want to be a dog owner now you know the realities. If it's the latter, the sooner the better, so that the puppy has a chance to be rehomed before any major problems develop (getting in touch with the breeder is the first step in this process).


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## ClaireandDaisy (Jul 4, 2010)

Well you can either man up and work through it and finally admit that life is not a Disney film...
or take the dog back. 
Up to you, really. 
But shouldn`t you at some point spare a thought for how the puppy feels?


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## Simbpup (Jul 23, 2014)

vickieb said:


> What breed is your pup some can be more high energy than others sometimes


He is a labrador, he is an low energy dog, really low energy


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## Hanwombat (Sep 5, 2013)

Everyone gets puppy blues! I was probably one of the worse - couldn't eat, sleep, was depressed, crying a lot etc. 

As others have said its quite common, but what is it you're getting so stressed about? If you research enough you will see that puppies are not all fun and games as some people think they may be. They're hard work and you need to be able to put the work into raising them.


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## Dogloverlou (Dec 8, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> He is a labrador, he is an low energy dog, really low energy


You're very lucky then! God knows how much more difficult it would be with a high energy, bouncing off the walls, kind of puppy.

You should list all the good qualities your pup possesses. It helps you appreciate your pup more


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## Hanwombat (Sep 5, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> He is a labrador, he is an low energy dog, really low energy


Bit strange for a labrador to be such low energy... My two labradors were mental and my parents one didn't really grow up until she was at least 3!


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> He is a labrador, he is an low energy dog, really low energy


I'm just after posting this on another thread:

"Also I'd tell people that your first few weeks and for some even months will be overwhelming if it's your first puppy, or you haven't had a puppy in a long time, you will shed tears, you will go from wondering why you ever wanted a dog, to wondering how you ever lived without one, you will feel guilty when your frayed round the edges and you are harder on pup than you normally would be, you might even go through a stage of hating this little peeing, pooing, biting, none sleeping little bundle of fluff. Just remember it's natural, nearly everyone goes through puppy blues and it does pass, and the more work you put in to the puppy the better the adult dog you get, and then you will wonder how you ever lived without your boy.. It WILL change your life ..."

People do regret getting puppies, people do sometimes dislike that puppy. Even with all the research in the world if you haven't had a puppy before it can be a BIG shock. It is natural, but you need to work out a routine for you and puppy.

What are you struggling with atm? Lots of people on here who have puppies, are going through it now, have been through it and they can give you advice.

You aren't the first and you won't be the last to feel this way, but you have a choice you can feel sorry for yourself, or you can get advice and help on how to make things better for you and puppy..if you don't want help then it might be best to contact the breeder...

Just ask for help and you will get it


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## agrumpycow (Dec 14, 2010)

If you're feeling so bad you can't eat or sleep then I recommend you think about going to the doctor as it seems it's about more than just the puppy. You don't 'have' to fall head over heels in love with your pup, life just isn't like that so just because you don't feel like you think you should, don't beat yourself up. 
At that age the puppy is likely to be teething so will be a bit stressed out itself but is sounds like you are doing everything right.


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## Sarah1983 (Nov 2, 2011)

I think the new puppy/dog blues are pretty normal to be honest. I remember thinking I'd made a huge, huge mistake when I first got Rupert. Things worked out just fine  Same with Spencer, that "oh god, what have I done? I can't cope!" feeling came with him too. Now I don't think I could find a more perfect dog.

Labrador puppy and low energy in the same sentence, don't think I've ever heard that before :yikes:


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## vickieb (Nov 22, 2010)

Simbpup said:


> He is a labrador, he is an low energy dog, really low energy


lab? low energy? is he broken hahahhaha

Mine is a lab too..... and he was just a living nightmare....... well, actually im probably being harsh, he was just a puppy and I was new to it all...... so it seemed like a nightmare..... like i said it gets better but you need to want to do it. I could TOTALLY see why people give up on their puppies as its really hard..... and i really didnt expect it to be!

eye opener for me. So I suppose you need to decide whats best..... for you and the pup.


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## vickieb (Nov 22, 2010)

Hanwombat said:


> my parents one didn't really grow up until she was at least 3!


mine is pushing 4 and STILL a loon


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

ClaireandDaisy said:


> Well you can either man up and work through it and finally admit that life is not a Disney film...
> or take the dog back.
> Up to you, really.
> But shouldn`t you at some point spare a thought for how the puppy feels?


Bit harsh I think they are thinking about the puppy....

"I don't feel its fair for the puppy to be with me. He should be with a family that will love him all the time."


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## Hopeattheendofthetunnel (Jun 26, 2013)

Hi simbpup & welcome 

Sometimes falling in love is an instant "where have you been all my life" and sometimes it takes some time.

NEITHER make you a better or worse owner...or parent. I recall one of my clostests friends crying buckets saying EXACTLY the same thing as you just said. Just in her case it pertained to her baby. "I just don't feel that overwhelming love for him, I just feel resentful and knackered". She diligently cared for him, met his needs, soothed, cuddled, but to her it felt fake and wrong. Because any emotion behind it was absent.

Fast forward to the present....she is one of the most brilliant parents I know. Who is besotted with her son.

You'll "click", have faith. Permit yourself to feel how you feel. Of course, if you come to a point where you start to actively dislike your pup and act upon it, then you HAVE to give him back. He had no say in the choice of owner and deserves a kind home.


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## Dimwit (Nov 10, 2011)

lostbear said:


> Sorry, but I have yo disagree with most posters. If you are still having problems in this "honeymoon" phase of dog ownership, I think you should take him back to the breeder while he is still young enough to adjust to a new home, and before he has picked up any really bad habits that a new owner would have to get rid of.
> 
> I know this will not be a popular post, but I think you should put your dog's happiness first. Perhaps in a couple of years you will be ready for a dog (maybe not a puppy), but I don't think you are now.


Normally I would agree with this, but OP hadn't given any specific information about what the actual problem is so it is quite difficult to judge.
Lots of posters on here have posted about how stressed/depressed they got with a young puppy which worked out in the longrun - which may also be the case here.

I had grown up with dogs but I still didn't realise quite what it would be like getting a puppy when I live on my own. That said, I never regretted getting him at all - we have had (and still do have) our fair share of issues but we muddle through and I wouldn't be without him.


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

Lostbear I would never described having a 14 week old puppy as being in the honeymoon phase of puppy ownership as they are blinking handwork at that age or at least mine was with the constant chewing biting snapping couldn't be trusted for 5 secs phase.

Simbpup it is hard work with a puppy but they do get better honest, I really struggled with Hector but he is just over 9 months old now and has come on leaps and bounds, I really didn't enjoy the puppy stage at all but it is all becoming a blurry haze now and I look back at teeny tiny pictures of him and think how cute he is but I really didn't feel that at the time.


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## Simbpup (Jul 23, 2014)

I want to thank everyone for helping me, and i know now that i am not the only one who has been trough this. It's nice to know that people are supportive.

I am only 15 years old, and 90% of the time its me taking care of the puppy. I have trained him, housebroken him, and so on .

I have decided that i will give all that i have, and try to do my best. I know there is some hard times now, but like you guys said, it will get easier, I must just hang in there 

And he is a labrador (black), and low energy, maybe some of the energy was drained by the hot weather outside.


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## ellenlouisepascoe (Jul 12, 2013)

I absolutely regretted getting my Puppy , over a year ago now. 

I didn't eat, didn't sleep, felt like I was constantly cleaning up after him. He destroyed stuff in the house, cried all night, was constantly cleaning up after his accidents in the house. He bit , he growled, he had food aggression... god the list is endless. 

I felt very alone and isolated and was scary that this little puppy depended on me for EVERYTHING. 

I didn't really "enjoy" having him till he was about 5/6 months old which is when I completely fell in love with him. I cannot imagine my life without him now he has changed my life so much for the better.


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## vickieb (Nov 22, 2010)

well you sound like your doing great to say your 15! I wouldnt have been very good at that age so well done 

can the family help out a little bit? Or was the deal you get a dog, you do it all? 

either way you will be fine in time..... and he will be your best pal


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## Hanwombat (Sep 5, 2013)

It does get easier - you may not think it will ever but it does and then you'll have a friend for life.


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## Hopeattheendofthetunnel (Jun 26, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> I want to thank everyone for helping me, and i know now that i am not the only one who has been trough this. It's nice to know that people are supportive.
> 
> I am only 15 years old, and 90% of the time its me taking care of the puppy. I have trained him, housebroken him, and so on .
> 
> ...


You seem like a very intelligent, articulate, considerate and decent young man/woman.

Who, by all accounts, has done an EXCELLENT job with the young creature entrusted into her care. Be proud of yourself, don't be too hard on yourself, and know that no one is ever going to adore you as unabashedly as your furry boy. For him, you are THE one, the best. Flaws and all.

Hard NOT to fall in love eventually with being so loved....


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> I want to thank everyone for helping me, and i know now that i am not the only one who has been trough this. It's nice to know that people are supportive.
> 
> I am only 15 years old, and 90% of the time its me taking care of the puppy. I have trained him, housebroken him, and so on .
> 
> ...


Lots of people on here struggle and they are not as young as you, so hang in there, come on here to have have a rant if you want, and also get advice and, there are great people who will take time out to help you.

Hey and well done  at 15 I so wouldn't have been up to looking after a dog or being so concerned for it's welfare, I'd of just expected my parents to sort it all  You are doing a great job and as I said people are always willing to help


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## rocco33 (Dec 27, 2009)

Simbpup said:


> I want to thank everyone for helping me, and i know now that i am not the only one who has been trough this. It's nice to know that people are supportive.
> 
> I am only 15 years old, and 90% of the time its me taking care of the puppy. I have trained him, housebroken him, and so on .
> 
> ...


Funny cos I was just about to ask how old you were when I read this post.

Is he a family dog or just yours? Were you the one that wanted a dog and your parents agreed provided you look after him as they weren't interested?


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## Simbpup (Jul 23, 2014)

rocco33 said:


> Is he a family dog or just yours? Were you the one that wanted a dog and your parents agreed provided you look after him as they weren't interested?


He is my dog, i was the one who wanted the dog, i bought him myself


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## Hopeattheendofthetunnel (Jun 26, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> He is my dog, i was the one who wanted the dog, i bought him myself


Were your parents in favour?

Or is having him a source of constant strife and tension?


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## shirleystarr (Mar 22, 2009)

Its hard at 15 to look after a puppy and I think so far you are doing great
Can you tell us what is stressing you so much that you cant eat or sleep Puppies sleep at night although they do need waking up to go for a pee
Are your parents not helping you at all?


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## Simbpup (Jul 23, 2014)

Hopeattheendofthetunnel said:


> Were your parents in favour?
> 
> Or is having him a source of constant strife and tension?


I only have my mother and big brother lost my father when i was younger, but my mom and brother, are happy on my behalf that i got a puppy, because i have always wanted a dog, my childhood was tough, so my mom said yes to a dog so that i could have a friend for life


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## Helbo (Sep 15, 2010)

I find it funny that earlier people were saying we don't have enough information regarding the situation as to whether the OP should rehome the dog or not. But now, knowing the OP is 15, even with the same lack of information, people are saying how fantastic they've done  sorry to be devils advocate, but we don't know enough to judge. If we should even be judging such a thing. 



My advice is the same. Work out whether it's just stress, or real regret as to the reality of owning a puppy/dog, and soon. For the puppy's sake.


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## rocco33 (Dec 27, 2009)

Simbpup said:


> I only have my mother and big brother lost my father when i was younger, but my mom and brother, are happy on my behalf that i got a puppy, because i have always wanted a dog, my childhood was tough, so my mom said yes to a dog so that i could have a friend for life


Well, I can understand that, but it is a big commitment and responsibility for someone you age, especially as you will are still at school and will have commitments there too - are you doing your GCSE's? Also, life can change so much for you over the next 5 to 10 years, opportunities can come that could be very difficult and you will have to miss if you are the sole carer for this pup.

It's one reason I would never buy a dog for my children unless it was for the whole family and myself. Will your mum and brother help? Can you get some support from them? What about long term? What if you want to go to university in a few years - what will happen to the dog then? If your mum will help share his care for the foreseeable future, then fine, otherwise, I would be tempted to say I think, as much as you want this, you may be too young and at a stage in your life when you aren't settled enough, so maybe taking him back to the breeder while he is still young would be best.
You have your whole life to have a dog - there will come a time in the future when you are more settled and more prepared for the responsibility that entails.
Good luck


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Helbo said:


> I find it funny that earlier people were saying we don't have enough information regarding the situation as to whether the OP should rehome the dog or not. But now, knowing the OP is 15, even with the same lack of information, people are saying how fantastic they've done  sorry to be devils advocate, but we don't know enough to judge. If we should even be judging such a thing.
> 
> My advice is the same. Work out whether it's just stress, or real regret as to the reality of owning a puppy/dog, and soon. For the puppy's sake.


Why are you confused? Where have people who have said rehome now said don't?

I do think it's fantastic that a 15 year old has the wit about them to seek out help, most adults don't, I do think it's fantastic that a 15 year old IS considering the welfare of their dog again most adults don't. So yes I think they are doing a great job considering, and I think it's great that can get support when they seemingly have so little.. I stand by my first post it's overwhelming having a puppy for anyone and OP needs to work out if they can put the work in or if not contact the breeder.

OP is a child in the eyes of the law so if you feel the need to kick them when down go ahead............

Only person I see making judgement is your good self


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## ellenlouisepascoe (Jul 12, 2013)

Helbo said:


> I find it funny that earlier people were saying we don't have enough information regarding the situation as to whether the OP should rehome the dog or not. But now, knowing the OP is 15, even with the same lack of information, people are saying how fantastic they've done  sorry to be devils advocate, but we don't know enough to judge. If we should even be judging such a thing.
> 
> My advice is the same. Work out whether it's just stress, or real regret as to the reality of owning a puppy/dog, and soon. For the puppy's sake.


Pet forums is where everyone comes to get judged , didn't you know that? 
I never judge anyone I just like to share my experiences as honestly as I can.


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## Helbo (Sep 15, 2010)

ellenlouisepascoe said:


> Pet forums is where everyone comes to get judged , didn't you know that?
> I never judge anyone I just like to share my experiences as honestly as I can.


LOL  Great reply!

I try to be honest with everyone. Which is why I had to share my observation. If we were talking to a 50 year old instead of a 15 year old, I wonder how different the replies would be :ihih: anyway, back to the thread!

Maybe if the OP gives more details, they'll get better advice?

Either way, Good Luck OP.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Helbo said:


> LOL  Great reply!
> 
> I try to be honest with everyone. Which is why I had to share my observation. If we were talking to a 50 year old instead of a 15 year old, I wonder how different the replies would be :ihih: anyway, back to the thread!
> 
> ...


Well of course they would be different because one is an adult the other isn't.... :sosp:


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## Helbo (Sep 15, 2010)

Meezey said:


> Well of course they would be different because one is an adult the other isn't.... :sosp:


IMO age shouldn't make a difference to the advice given to an owner deciding whether or not they made a mistake getting a puppy. It doesn't matter to the puppy how old the owner is, so it doesn't matter to me either

right logging off now - off on my holidays!


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## Hopeattheendofthetunnel (Jun 26, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> I only have my mother and big brother lost my father when i was younger, but my mom and brother, are happy on my behalf that i got a puppy, because i have always wanted a dog, my childhood was tough, so my mom said yes to a dog so that i could have a friend for life


Simbpup.....talk to your mum.

Tell her that you feel trapped and overwhelmed.

And I realise that starting this conversation is REALLY hard. You wanted the dog and now it is a case of "this played so much better in my head". But however guilty and foolish you feel, you owe it to your pup to be honest and find the best solution. Plus, she will have been in a situation like it.

As a teenager you have a right to consider your needs and wishes first. But having a pup or a baby means that you have to consider THEIR needs first. Hence, there is a conflict and no wonder you feel down.

Talk to her, email her, or put a note under her bedroom door, but let her know how you feel. It isn't fair on you NOR the pup if you just meander on hoping for the best. She is the adult and she will help you to find the right solution for all of you.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Helbo said:


> IMO age shouldn't make a difference to the advice given to an owner deciding whether or not they made a mistake getting a puppy. It doesn't matter to the puppy how old the owner is, so it doesn't matter to me either
> 
> right logging off now - off on my holidays!


Didn't say it did, but talking to a responsible adult in the eyes of the law is different that talking to a child in the eyes of the law.... Or maybe to some it isn't...


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## El Cid (Apr 19, 2014)

Helbo said:


> If we were talking to a 50 year old instead of a 15 year old, I wonder how different the replies would be :ihih: anyway, back to the thread!
> 
> Maybe if the OP gives more details, they'll get better advice?


I am a new dog owner at the age of 50+, and its really hard.

It is like having the responsibility of a baby, with great rewards. I cannot see myself being on the negative side, and giving up, but its a real life change. People can get really lazy, it is good to get out more, keep posative and good luck.


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## Little P (Jun 10, 2014)

Being a teenager is tough at the best of times, having a puppy is tough too, so I'm not surprised you're feeling a bit overwhelmed! 

I got my dog as a 7 week old puppy when I was 14 - he was my 14th birthday present after losing both of our family dogs quite close together. (I think he was supposed to be a family dog that we would have had anyway, but it saved my mum buying me an actual present  ). It seems that I had similar circumstances to yourself - I too lost my father when I was young, and I had a tough home life due to the whole situation.

Anyway, I've been the one responsible for my dog for his whole life - I've trained him, I've paid for his food and vets bills, I gave my mum money for his pet insurance every month from my allowance until I was 18 and it was put into my name, he's very much my dog, but at the same time, my family were still involved which has proved to be very handy!

It'd be great if you could get your family involved - I think training classes would be a fantastic opportunity for you and your family (definitely mum, siblings too depending on how old they are) to really build a strong bond with your pup. As you get older, life will change and you may need their support - I've been very lucky that my mum was able to look after my dog for 5 years while I was at uni - he lived with her, but I still travelled the 50 mile round trip every day to take him for his daily walks etc. Equally, when I go on holiday, when I have to work double shifts etc. my dog goes off to stay with my mum, so there will be times in the future that they may need to get involved and help out. Training him as a family will help everybody build a good relationship with him. 

Your family can also enjoy nice walks and things with the two of you when puppy is vaccinated and allowed out too. 

(And if you have any photos, we'd love to see them   )


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

When I was 15 I got my first pup I was so happy but I really did'nt understand what hard work it would be and at times wished I did'nt have her,that dog turned out to be my best mate and my protector.She died when she was 18 years old and it broke my heart.Try thinking you are all that dog has in the world,dogs ask for nothing but love and to feel safe.Best of luck you will get there and wonder why you felt like this.


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## yamazumi (Sep 22, 2009)

Hanwombat said:


> Bit strange for a labrador to be such low energy... My two labradors were mental and my parents one didn't really grow up until she was at least 3!


I wouldn't say Rory was "low energy" but she was an incredibly calm puppy from the start and still is, I've always had people commenting on it. Every other lab puppy I've ran into that was a similar age to her was pretty insane. I don't know what her siblings are like though.


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## Blaise in Surrey (Jun 10, 2014)

Little P said:


> Being a teenager is tough at the best of times, having a puppy is tough too, so I'm not surprised you're feeling a bit overwhelmed!
> 
> I got my dog as a 7 week old puppy when I was 14 - he was my 14th birthday present after losing both of our family dogs quite close together. (I think he was supposed to be a family dog that we would have had anyway, but it saved my mum buying me an actual present  ). It seems that I had similar circumstances to yourself - I too lost my father when I was young, and I had a tough home life due to the whole situation.
> 
> ...


Just want to say that I think that's amazing  Well done you!


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## Blaise in Surrey (Jun 10, 2014)

To the OP, I want to repeat something said a number of posts back, in case it was missed: what would you say (not necessarily to us!) are the main issues that are causing you to lose sleep and to feel depressed? Analysing those might be useful, as you will be able to work out (maybe with help) which of the issues will improve with time, and which are a permanent part of dog-ownership. It should also flag up which issues (if any) are actually to do with things other than your pooch .


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## Little P (Jun 10, 2014)

BlaiseinHampshire said:


> Just want to say that I think that's amazing  Well done you!


Someone had to walk him! My mum doesn't like walking him - she says he's unpredictable (actually, he's very predictable - he's very dog reactive!). He couldn't go without a walk for 5 years, so I didn't have much choice! She will drive him to the disused air field where it's easy to avoid other dogs for walkies when I'm away on holiday, but as she saw it, he is my dog, he's my responsibility.

Based on this (and some other reasons but to be honest, largely because of my dog!) I chose a university closer to home, and turned down a place on a veterinary medicine degree in London - goodbye life long dream! :sosp: As a result of choosing the wrong degree, I did 5 years and dropped out without actually getting a degree, and currently work 50+ hours a week to make ends meet (70 hours last week!) on little more than minimum wage.

But at least I have my dog


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## springerpete (Jun 24, 2010)

Simbpup said:


> I got a puppy when he was 9 weeks old and he is now 14 weeks, and i am going insane, I dont eat or sleep, i've got a bad stomach felling about my puppy.
> 
> He is a great puppy, he house trained, and learned some of the basic command, but there is something wrong, i don't know what it is. It's like I can't handle the responsibility. I am afraid that if i return him that i would regret it for the rest of my life.
> 
> I have read that i will get easier... but when??. I am so stressed and depressed all the time, I don't feel its fair for the puppy to be with me. He should be with a family that will love him all the time.


Hi Simbpup,
I've read through your post a couple of times, I've also looked through the replies you've received, in the main the advice you've been given has been well informed and well meaning.
In my experience, and I don't pretend to be an expert, the best way to form a bond with a young pup is by the simple act of playing with them, sit on the floor and simply interact, training is, of course vital, but play, in my opinion is the thing that forms the bond, builds up trust in the pup and, frankly is such good fun for both of you. Spend an hour or so being silly with your pup, I'm sure you'll soon be smiling and feel more relaxed, and your pup will have enjoyed some fun as well as getting some exercise. Just watch out for those puppy teeth though, they are sharp. Good luck with him, I'm sure that in a week or so you'll be wondering what you were worrying about. 
Take care. Pete.


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## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

Meezey said:


> Didn't say it did, but* talking to a responsible adult in the eyes of the law is different that talking to a child in the eyes of the law.... * Or maybe to some it isn't...


Sorry, what?  What is this law I'm either having a brain fart about or doesn't exist? Sorry Meezey, but when advising someone about a dog it doesn't matter how bleemin old they are.


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## Finnboy (Aug 1, 2013)

I just wanted to add to others saying it gets better.....my OH and I were looking at pics of Finn this time last year just tonight and talking about this...he was a nightmare! He too is a black lab and we got him at 7.5weeks at the start of the hottest summer for years!

Many on here may remember me desperate to stop him waking us up at 4.30am....I'm in my 40s, a full time working mum with two kids....he was killing me! I had never know sleep deprivation like it even after two babies....he ate every shrub in the garden, dug holes to china all over the lawn and spent most of the summer verging on heatstroke because he is a black lab! He was a bouncy pup but not high energy in terms of needing to walk for hours every days. 

I'll admit.....I really really didn't like him for a while and wondered what the h*ll we'd done replacing our placid old dog so soon afterwards with this nutter!! He was just being a pup and we'd just forgotten what that was like!!!

Things will get better....you sound like you're doing great!

Ps I love Finn now (despite the little bugger still causing us issues with his health that he can't help!)..... He sleeps until at least 6am now! Yippee!! (sarcasm!)....but we can feed him and go back to bed now so we cope much better! Lol!


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Phoolf said:


> Sorry, what?  What is this law I'm either having a brain fart about or doesn't exist? Sorry Meezey, but when advising someone about a dog it doesn't matter how bleemin old they are.


Huh? You don't know when someone is legally considered an adult? How very odd?

How you advise them matters, children don't and shouldn't have the same responsiblities as adults, so yes I wouldn't speak to a 15 year old child the same way I would a 50 year old adult, and I'd find it odd if anyone would think it would be the same convo?


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

All normal. I got my Dexy (also a black Lab) at the age of 15. Yep, he was a pain in the arse like all puppies, but they are worth persevering with. I still have him of course and he's now an old git of 11 - it gets much easier, trust me!

I had the mega puppy blues with Bo and genuinely considered taking her back to the breeders. I never would have, but thinking that I could made me feel better about it. 

Getting a pup is a BIG upheaval and not always the happy-fantasy-Disney experience that it's often portrayed to be. It's just one of those things. Buuut, most people get over it and wonder what all the fuss was about months down the line.


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

Meezey said:


> Huh? You don't know when someone is legally considered an adult? How very odd?
> 
> How you advise them matters, children don't and shouldn't have the same responsiblities as adults, so yes I wouldn't speak to a 15 year old child the same way I would a 50 year old adult, and I'd find it odd if anyone would think it would be the same convo?


Really...? I speak to my 15 year old sister like an adult (she's more mature than me). We are not talking about a toddler here.


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## lostbear (May 29, 2013)

Simbpup said:


> I want to thank everyone for helping me, and i know now that i am not the only one who has been trough this. It's nice to know that people are supportive.
> 
> I am only 15 years old, and 90% of the time its me taking care of the puppy. I have trained him, housebroken him, and so on .
> 
> ...


You are young - it's a big responsibility, especially if thus is your first family dog and you had no idea what to expect.

But always - make your puppy's needs your priority. I know it's hard, but if you take an animal on, that is what you must do. You have chosen to have him - he is dependent on you for EVERYTHING.

I will say that if you decide you keep him you will get a lot of support from some very experienced dog owners here, so you won't be on your own.

And best of luck.


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## Nicky10 (Jan 11, 2010)

Puppies are a big shock to the system and I imagine this is the first time you've had another living creature totally dependant on you. I was 17 when I got Buster and he was enough work. 

Stick with it and ask for help if you need it. I'm sure you're doing a great job but puppies are a lot of work. At least you have the summer off school so you don't have to worry about that as well as the puppy.


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## JordanWalker (Aug 13, 2013)

Puppies are very active and they want all your attention. Maybe you need an adjustment and try to take time to spend with your puppy. You can try to walk with him everyday for 15-20 minutes. In this way, you will get an exercise and at the same time a bonding with your puppy. You will regret if you will return him.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

labradrk said:


> Really...? I speak to my 15 year old sister like an adult (she's more mature than me). We are not talking about a toddler here.


I know we are not talking to a toddler, but OP is not your sister, and given we don't know the true situation here I'm concerned about the OP's welfare as well as the puppys.


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## Jobeth (May 23, 2010)

Have you talked to your parents about the way you feel? Maybe they would help out more if they knew you weren't eating and sleeping properly. As others have said look at one issue at a time and deal with it that way.


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

Dillon was nightmare puppy, as much as we loved him he nearly went back to his breeder more than once. Now he is all grown up and we have the most loving dog you could wish for, he still has his moments but he is my best friend and I would not be without him.


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## Sarahliz100 (Jan 5, 2014)

As others have said, puppies do get easier as they get older. If you're having specific problems then perhaps those on here can help if you give more info.

Not eating and sleeping sounds like there's potentially more going on than just a troublesome pup though. It might be worth having a chat with your GP about it. And talk to your family if you can.

Have a think about what specifically is troubling you, and have a chat with those around you and see if you can rope in some help. I think there's a good chance that if you can get everything in perspective you can get past this and have a lovely relationship with your puppy. But if you decide that having a puppy is more than you can cope with at the moment then don't feel ashamed in admitting it.


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