# My cats hate each other! Help?



## j333 (Jun 24, 2008)

I have two cats who are 2 years and 4 months old. They are brother and sister and we've had them since kittens.
They used to snuggle together as kittens and were very affectionate. Then they went through a long phase of just not having much to do with each other (they became more independant) but still showed the odd bit of affection.
Now they can hardly be in the same room with out chasing and hissing. The way it looks to me is that the male cat wants to play and starts to chase the female, the female just hisses, growls and scratches out at him. She seems to have a few scratches on her face though so I can't really put the blame on either of them. Sometimes themale will just be sat minding his own business and the female will come up and whack him on the top of the head! He doesn't retaliate, he just looks sad and sits still???
Once in a while they'll have a little nose rub or a quick sneaky lick of the others ear but then they run away from each other.
What is going on? I'm really worried because, one will come and get cuddles whilst the other jealously watches from a distance.
My first baby is due in August and I worry this will increase tension and I just want all my family to feel loved and happy!
They have both been spayed/neutered and have free run of most of the house (excluded from our bedroom most of the time for last 6 months since I found out I was pregnant). They have a cat flap which is open 8am-11pm (ish). The female is out all day and night and the male is wherever we are, when we're home and I assume he's in most of the time when we're not. Me and my husband both currently work full time, standard office hours. 
Sorry for all the detail, any advise would be greatly appreciated!
J x


----------



## Emstarz (May 20, 2008)

It seems strange for them to turn on one another after growing up together. I don't have much advise to give but did wonder if one could be ill because cats can sometimes sense weaknesses like that??
Hope it improves and someone has better advice.
You could maybe try a feliway plug.


----------



## Selk67U2 (May 5, 2008)

*I don't know what to say to be honest. I've not heard of 2 that are brought up together turning on each other like that unless they are entire and the hormones make them moody. I have behaviour like it off my Queens from time to time, but not everyday.
You could, as, Em says, try Feliway plug-ins. 
Maybe someone else on here has some more ideas, sorry, not much help really*


----------



## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

If they are both entire-i would say it was hormones,cats as kittens act as they do in that they snuggle etc but as they grow older hormones kick in and their behaviour changes,if she is out all day she may have been had by an outside male who was aggressive or just as rampant as her-i dunno,but if they are entire and is okay to do so i would get them both neutered and restore peace and harmony in their lives and yours-assuming you don't want kitts that is


----------



## j333 (Jun 24, 2008)

Thanks for the comments. They were both neutered as kittens and were fine for quite a while, it's just got worse as they've got older. Feels really sad


----------



## Selk67U2 (May 5, 2008)

*Yea, I can understand that, is so frustrating when you don't know what to do. I wish I had an answer, but it's got me stumped*


----------



## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

Try the feliway plug as Emz suggested,sorry you did say about them being neutered,been a hectic day so wasn't quite with itIt's expensive the Feliway plug but worth it as they really do work,also maybe get them checked at the vet or at least the moodiest one as something may be going on that you can't see


----------



## PoppyLily (Jan 8, 2008)

this happened with my nannas cats. She had a male and female from the same litter. They got on great until about a year ago. They are nearly 5 years old. Both are neatuered. 
The male all of a sudden just started attacking the female. My nanna keeps 2 beds in her shed so that if they're out they can go in there if it gets cold. Now the male wont even let the female in the shed. If she tries to go in there or even eat by the male he goes besserk and cracks her one round the chops. The other day she had a big bit of fur missing from her side and there is no doubt in out mind that he caused this. 

It is so strange cos when they are in the house they get on great - cuddled up etc. He only behaves like this outside the house.


----------



## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

Hey kelsie-glad to see you've popped inHow've ya been diddlin' love?


----------



## may (Nov 2, 2007)

You could try some homeopathic remedies to calm them
they do work


----------



## j333 (Jun 24, 2008)

Just a quick update. It's got to the point now where the female is growling and hissing whenever the other cat is nearby. She won't come in the house if she can see him. Last night when we tried to hold her she growled, hissed and meowed at us too?? Poor thing is unhappy, going to vets this evening for a check up. Will keep you posted.


----------



## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

Did you try any homeopathic remedies or the felliway plug J? Anyways good luck and do keep us updated


----------



## Guest (Jul 7, 2008)

Hi,

Its so odd isn't it? I just wonder if its something that is happening during the day outside? a certain scent on the other cat that is making the female feel threatened in some way. But its so odd after all this time. I really think the feliway could work well. Do they have their own bowls and litter trays, maybe if they have their own places it may settle in time.

Best of luck to you, it must be so upsetting, disharmony between two cats you love so much.

Jo


----------



## j333 (Jun 24, 2008)

Saw the vet, we're trying feliway. They think it could be due to us getting the house ready for my baby's arrival. This means that some territories have had to move. She said if it doesn't settle in a couple of weeks to go back and consider blood tests.


----------



## Guest (Jul 7, 2008)

I hope it all works out well for you. Seems a bit of a mystery.

I have a brother and sister from the same litter and they are 6 years old now. And still as friendly to one another.

Oh and they had to get used to two babies - they were fine. And infact are excellent with the kids - will let the kids stroke them with no scratching. 

Hope it gets sorted.


----------



## Selk67U2 (May 5, 2008)

*Ahhh, glad you saw the vet. Hope the feliway works for you. It does for me*


----------



## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

Hopefully things will settle,they just have to come round to the idea that they are gaining another playmate-and everything crossed they will


----------



## Meezers (Jun 13, 2008)

...................................................................


----------



## tigerlily421 (Jul 21, 2008)

HELPP ME!! Me and my boyfriend adopted a Calico kitten back in march, and decided to get her a companion three days ago. when we brought him home we introduced them through the door, and than face to face. It didn't go well so I researched online what we were supposed to do and it says to do the process slowly. We've been trying to keep them separate as possible, but its hard to do because of the litter boxes. 
I can understand the calico's hissing and growling when the new kitten is around, but she's now acting horrible towards us. she wont let us hold her, she growls and hisses menacingly at us, and she spends all her time under the couch, even when the new kitten is in our bedroom. I've heard that Calico cats can be difficult to get along with other cats because they are territorial, but I just cant understand why she is so angry with us! If someone has any ideas or advice, please please PLEASE let me know! Im starting to worry now. It would be greatly appreciated 

thank you!!!!!!


----------



## cats4eva (Mar 21, 2008)

Whenever I have brought a new cat into the home all of my cats react different....some freak out...some accept more or less straight away...some get a moody on.....

As with alot of issues we experience with cats alot of it is about time, patience and encouragement.

When I have brought a new cat home I have always slept downstairs with them until I am satisfied that they are all cool with each other.

I would give it 2 weeks and then look back on the situation as it is and as it was and reasses...I think you just need to give it more time right now..


----------



## dogzncatz (Jun 16, 2008)

Use a comnination of :

Feliway diffuser

Feliway spray over all bedding, corners of settees, doorframes etc

Bach Rescue Remedy, 4 drops in the drinking water every time you top it up plus 4 drops in food each time you feed them.


----------



## martaasaeda (Nov 29, 2008)

Hello! I have exactly the same problem. My cats are more or less from the same litter and they have different personalities and resulting communication problem. They occasionally show some affection. My solution is to bring in a "common enemy" sometimes. The occasion doesn't arise so conveniently so I'm trying to arrange something. Basically to have another cat for a day or so. If there is a serious fight, the visitor would need to be confined in one room, but even that is sufficient for development of solidarity. Please see my youtube video if you are interested in how they end up as a result. (visitor's name is Dietrich. My youtube name is martaasaeda)
Otherwise, feliway seems to do some job. It's getting a bit chilly even in southern california so I put two heatpads under sofa cover, about 3inches apart. Nadya normally sleeps on the couch, and Tatra never. I sprayed feliway over the couch, as well as other places in the living room. Now, Tatra is already sleeping on the same couch, less than a foot from Nadya. 
But still, the friendliest they have ever gotten so far to each other (about 3 years) is when Dietrich showed up and I kept him for a day. By the way, too scary thing wont work: I got the lab dog of my colleague over, they got too horrified to think straight. Another easy going cat would do. Note also that it works probably because somewhere in their mind, they care about each other. It seems like your cats also show some sign of affection, perhaps it may work.


----------



## nutcracker (Aug 19, 2008)

Sorry to hear this. Very unusual.
Try feeding them seperatly, to give them the knowledge they can eat without threat. Feliway is a great product, but doesn't work for all.
I would also get both checked by a vet, I have a girl who is loved by all my cats, except when she is unwell! Then they pick on her. 
The other sugestion is to put BOTH on a course of Zylkene. This is a natural product and is used for stress in cats. It works for more cats than not. 
Also worth ensuring you have seperate beds for them, and interact with some games from you. The baby you are having may even be the instigator of all of this as they can sense your changes! A pal of mine had terrible trouble with hers when she was pregnant.
Zylkene Natural Pet Destressing 100 Tablets - £26.43 :
Here is the link for where you can buy Zylkene (they sell Feliway too) and at a reduced price. One pack of 100 will do both cats long enough for you to see if it helps!
Good luck


----------

