# My Dog cant understand other Dog's behaviour - HELP, I don't know what to do!!!



## Amelia_87 (Oct 15, 2008)

Hi there

I have had a good browse in this forum and can't find anything that is similar to what's happening with me and my boy.

I have 13 month old Labrador, Casper. He's been neutered and has been socialised with other dogs since he was allowed out. 
He has been a handful - which i was expecting - so I've taken him to training classes, he passed his KC Bronze award, thank god! I have taught him basics - sit, stay, lie down, paw, etc etc. I am getting there with lead training - still a puller, very much so, but slowly and surely getting better.

Now Casper is definitely a dogs dog. He is obsessed with other dogs and always wants to go over to them and play, say hello. However... He is a very dominant dog, which was a surprise to me, as he's a lab and I was naive in thinking they couldnt be like that, and are quite friendly, happy go lucky dogs that get on with everyone and everything. When he says hello to a dog - he wont just walk up and sniff, he'll charge at them and run around them - his hackles stand on end everytime he meets a new dog. 

Now, him being a dominant dog, he can be overpowering to other dogs, he sometimes stands over them, or even humps them if he gets the chance. He is also obsessed with playing with dogs and having attention from them - even if its negative. This is the point where Im tearing my hair out trying to find a way of stopping this behaviour.

Casper will pester and pester and pester and pester a dog - even if it doesnt want to play or interact with him, it will let him know by either walking off, or giving him a warning bark or grumble - BUT Casper WILL NOT GET IT INTO HIS HEAD that the dog wants to be left alone. He doesnt understand when to stop, he doesnt understand when to give up. He'll just keep going back.

If a dog has a go at him, it makes him worse, he gets more and more in their face and more and more bothersome - he'll jump all over them, try and nibble their mouth - he'll nudge them and bash into them. I have to drag him away eventually - he is becoming a bully. I cannot get him to come back to me (where normally he's pretty good at coming back) and he will not leave the dog. 
Ive had people threatening to kick him off their dogs and things like that - even though theres no aggression, no teeth baring or vicious biting etc.

Some dogs Casper will just charge at and barge into - still not being aggressive but being overpowering and dominant and bullish. He's a rough player and stomps all over dogs - and practically squashes little dogs. I am really losing the will now as I have no idea what to do - he's been socialised from a very young age and I cant seem to get this behaviour out of his system - I don't want to have to stop him interacting with other dogs. 

Please... any help would be greatly appreciated... Its upsetting and Im going mad trying to find out how to deal with it, as I thought I was doing well - socialising him early, taking him training classes, being a responsible dog owner, and taking care of him properly. 

Amelia xxxx


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## Bearpaw (Dec 10, 2009)

Hi Amelia.
Sorry to hear you are having problems.Can i ask a few more questions?
Did he come from a small litter?
Did you get him when he was very tiny?
Is it mainly male dogs,or both?
How often is he walked?
What is his general behaviour at home,is he very playful? and does he listen to commands especially if he pushes you,does he stop when you ask him to?


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## ClaireandDaisy (Jul 4, 2010)

he sounds as though he wants to play - why not play with him yourself when out? Play ball or scent games, do some fun training, make yourself more interesting than those other dogs? 
If you work at interacting more with him when out it will make him more responsive to you and ignore distractions.


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## nfp20 (Jun 29, 2010)

personally I would seek some behavioural training from a good trainer if you have any worries.

My friend attends a 'shy guys' group which helps to socialise dogs with a variety of issues and has done very well but it might not be in your area. If your interested I'll ask for the info she's based in Oxford.


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## Amelia_87 (Oct 15, 2008)

Bearpaw said:


> Hi Amelia.
> Sorry to hear you are having problems.Can i ask a few more questions?
> Did he come from a small litter?
> Did you get him when he was very tiny?
> ...


You can ask as many Q's as u like! Im grateful for any help )

He came from a normal size litter - i think there were 6 - 8 puppies - he was one of 4 boys. 
We got him at 8 weeks old
He doesnt really have a pattern with dogs - i thought he might, but they can be big or small, yappy or quiet, he doesnt seem to have a 'type'.
He is walked every day, in a variety of places, tend to be wooded areas and fields with streams and lakes for him to swim in, he also goes to a doggy day care 2 days a week to help with socialisation and to release any excess energy he has.

He is quite dominent at home - not with me or my dad, it tends to be my mum who is the 'weakest link' so to speak, which i know probably does contribute to him thinking he is boss! Were all clubbing together to really work on that and make sure he doesnt dominate us and basically take the mic really with his behaviour - as he has done in the past, e.g stealing food, jumping up etc.

He does respond to commands, he is very food driven, so if you have a treat to reward him, hes pretty much yours - he'll do anything!! He is very playful and can get carried away and a bit rough, so when he does i tend to stop and then resume when he's calmed down again. 
He does however, if hes in a bugger of a mood, have selective hearing and will choose to ignore commands and things. It tends to get worse when there are distractions and other dogs - a lot of the time I have no chance, it tends to be 50/50 whether one day he'll chose me to come back to or the dog. It does vary depending on the dog as well, how responsive he is to me... its so weird, I cant pinpoint a specific trait or pattern!

Thanks for ur response!

Amelia xxx


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## Amelia_87 (Oct 15, 2008)

Just a point as well...

This isnt just for when he is out walking with me, its for when he's at doggy day care and Im not there - I want to make sure he will behave and interact with dogs in a way that isnt going to end up with him pestering a dog so much that he ends up getting bitten - i dont want it to come to that.

I have no idea how to make him realise what the dog is communicating to him - he doesnt seem to understand that some dogs just dont want to play or be bothered.

xxx


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## tripod (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Amelia  First of all nothing in your description describes a 'dominant' dog - this doesn't exist. Dominance describes a relationship between two individuals established when one consistently defers in relation to possession of resources to the other.

Your dog is a Lab and a teenager and forgive me for saying is a bit obnoxious and bad mannered with other dogs 
Labs often play well with other labs but many other dogs often do not enjoy this sort of play. There are several breeds/types with pretty obnoxious play styles.

Did Casper get to play with lots and lots and lots of adults who told him off from the age of 6-9 months? It is important that puppies are really thoroughly socialised with other dogs during their first 5 months so that they learn about appeasment displays. After this it is equally important that they are 'harassed' by other adults so that they learn how to put that signalling into practice - this must go on during early teenage years. We often protect our puppies from this important harassement and they lose out.

Its still important for your dog to play with other dogs but its even more important for you to supervise him closely and control him so that he doesn't get himself into trouble.

Hackling and humping are sure signs of over-arousal, inability to calm down and a little stress at this. His frenetic movement, face licking etc. are signs of conflict - he doesn't know how to behave in this situation. He doesn't know how to do greetings and presumes that he must barge in and attempt to take over the greeting.
He is crying out for some help and guidance.

Work on teaching him some self-calming exercises. Check out the books Click to Calm and Controlled Unleashed for these. Simple ones like teaching your dog to focus on you and lie down before getting to go play will help enormously (some detail here: Cerrrraaaazzzzzy to Calm Quickly « pawsitive dogs )
The game Jazz up and Settle down is essential for teenagers - detail here: Calming Exercises for Cerrrraaaazzzzzy Canines: settle & mat work « pawsitive dogs

Only allow him go play if he is calm - take one step towards another dog at a time and in an arc - teach him to greet politley by preventing him from greeting head on and/or if he is showing any signs of being wound up (e.g. hackling, tension, dilated pupils, vocalising). Just wait for calm - his reward for calm is to play.

Keep play sessions short - less than 20 seconds. Then interrupt and allow each dog to settle down for at least twice the length of the play session e.g. 40 seconds. His reward for re-focusing on you is to go play again.

If he goes overboard and continues even though his playmate is asking him to calm you need to time him out so as to calm down. Get him re-focused and then allow him to play again.

It is prob not a good idea to just allow him to play with anyone right now until you have a little more control and he can control himself a little better. Set up lots of play dates with suitable, reliable stooges so that he doesn't de-socialise and so that you can continue to work on training exercises.

THe more he gets to play the way he does the more he becomes addicted to the high caused by stress hormones which are right brought on by excitment spilling over into a little distress. This very easily spills over into play sessions rapidly turning into spats. He is already showing early signs of play-skill deficits and this often goes down hill.

Its great that you have done so much work on manners and basic exercises so now its time to get working on generalising these exercises when around other dogs. Teaching him to be calm and be able to regain self control is essential and the first step.

Best of luck to you and Casper


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## dodigna (Feb 19, 2009)

I am no expert, but all you describe seems pretty much normal teen age labrador behaviour to me :lol: :lol:

Gotta love their exuberance and jois de vivre! No, they don't take no for an answer, ever! This rep labs have of being happy go lucky, chilled out dogs is true, but people tend to forget to mention they part of when the dog is a pup /adolescent, young labs are the most hyper dogs I have ever come across on walks! If I hear there is a lab under the age of 2 in the park I flee!!! My dog hates puppies and a young lab is his idea of hell, the more he tells them to bugger off the more fun they seem to have taunting him, not a dominance thing at all. But you are right in wanting to address this as they can easily end up with a bad experience and you need to teach them to focus on you and some self restrain.
I find click to calm like Tripod suggests a really good aid.

Labs owners may disagree and don't take this as a critique as it is not meant to be, I totally love watching a young lab doing his thing, but they take ages to mature in my opinion or so it seems in all the ones I have met. 
Takes time and patient and a lot of training and eventually they become the chilled dogs in the ad! I love labs :lol:

If you are in reach of Surrey there are some good socialization classes I go to, would not necessarily pick a "shy" class as no doubt your pup would worry a shy dog to the point of reaction, he needs more like a naughty class where dogs will teach him manners and teaching dogs will intervene when he over steps the mark...

My dogs used to charge at dogs which was seldom tolerated by more mature dogs, he was just excited to go say hi and liked to impose his presence, it took just a few sessions for him to learn that is not the ting to do in a civilized dogs' world!


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

tripod said:


> Labs often play well with other labs but many other dogs often do not enjoy this sort of play. There are several breeds/types with pretty obnoxious play styles.
> 
> ...
> 
> ...


I was very interested to read this post, I am currently grappling with the play balance of a 15 week Border Collie pup, who enjoys playing with a 1 yr old Lab. Recently however the Lab female, is backing away from the play fighting, and is getting herded effectively by the young pup. I noticed the Lab has recently put on weight and seems rather more sendentary, she still comes over to greet the pup when we arrive at that part of the park with enthusiasm, it just seems she tires of the game when a few weeks ago she appeared inexhaustible.

My slight concern, is that this Lab bitch, really ought to have disciplined the pup, if she'd had enough. The owner is very relaxed and laissez-faire, I just wonder what might happen though, should the Lab get fed up of being pushed around by a much smaller dog, that's not respecting her.

With Collie bitches the pup meets, he gets put in his place if their patience is exhausted, and behaves much more respectfully. I think I rather prefer this stich in time, and worry the Lab bitch might over-compensate or go directly to a much higher stage of conflict, if she doesn't have the normal way to "discipline" a young dog in her.

Have you any tips on handling the other dog owners? I am finding them frankly much more difficult to understand than the dogs, and I find polite request to simply ignore my scolded pup for a moment fall on deaf ears. Similarly other owners seem not to regard the signs of high adrenaline in the dogs as a concern, and I have been questioning the supervision/let dogs be dogs balance.

I am wondering if I need to actively seek out younger play partners, and cool off the play with this Lab who is doing nothing to reduce the pups natural boldness; whilst maintaining the contacts with the Collie bitches.


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## Colliepoodle (Oct 20, 2008)

tripod said:


> Hi Amelia  First of all nothing in your description describes a 'dominant' dog - this doesn't exist. Dominance describes a relationship between two individuals established when one consistently defers in relation to possession of resources to the other.
> 
> Your dog is a Lab and a teenager and forgive me for saying is a bit obnoxious and bad mannered with other dogs
> Labs often play well with other labs but many other dogs often do not enjoy this sort of play. There are several breeds/types with pretty obnoxious play styles.
> ...


Top post as ever.


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## Bearpaw (Dec 10, 2009)

It may be an idea to have a really good chat with the day care centre and find out if there are any dogs that he really gets on well with,and does he play with any that do tell him off,and that he listens to?
Also find out if they use any technics to get him to calm down,what do they do?
As has been said,this is typical lab behaviour,but they do come out of it eventually!! Just persevere,keep up with the training,try and make sure he always listens to your requests at home and get your mom to work with you on this.Maybe think about agility,or scent training to make him work abit and these things will get the focus on you as he will have to listen to commands etc.
You have done a great job with him,dont doubt yourself.


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## tripod (Feb 14, 2010)

RobD-BCactive said:


> I was very interested to read this post, I am currently grappling with the play balance of a 15 week Border Collie pup, who enjoys playing with a 1 yr old Lab. Recently however the Lab female, is backing away from the play fighting, and is getting herded effectively by the young pup. I noticed the Lab has recently put on weight and seems rather more sendentary, she still comes over to greet the pup when we arrive at that part of the park with enthusiasm, it just seems she tires of the game when a few weeks ago she appeared inexhaustible.
> 
> My slight concern, is that this Lab bitch, really ought to have disciplined the pup, if she'd had enough. The owner is very relaxed and laissez-faire, I just wonder what might happen though, should the Lab get fed up of being pushed around by a much smaller dog, that's not respecting her.
> 
> ...


Hi Rob, people training is too difficult so I stick to the dogs :lol: I think its important that you do what you do with your dog and not get involved in 'experts' debates at the park.

The only way to make the supervision/let dogs be dogs decision is to understand dog behaviour and dog play. If you own an adolescent dog it is even more essential that you step in if the other dog/owners do not.

If your dog is told off, usually appropriatley, allow this until your dog offers appropriate signaling and then interrupt by separating.
This is so as to ensure that the other dogs' correction is not OTT and is actually a learning op for your pup.

Its ok for you pup to play with a mix of personalities. But if you notice the other dog throwing discomfort signaling and your dog not heeding/continuing the rough play interupt if the other dog doesn't correct.

You are so right about people not recognising 'high' dogs - this state becomes addictive and the dog becomes so difficult to control.

Your pup needs lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of play opportunities. Always interrupt play sessions after about 30 seconds, get pup to refocus on you and then reward with more play. Interrupt and time out if pup is being excessively rude with another dog, especially a laid back one.


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## Fyfer (Jan 23, 2010)

Tripod, thanks so much for your post.
I have this trouble with Nunuk, 10 months old and hackles up when he starts playing. I've never understood it and you've given the answer. Now that I understand it, we can work with it.

My boy does a nice initial greeting. Very polite, arc approach and gentle sniffing. And then he starts bullying until the other dog does something. He's been told off well by a few adult dogs but clearly needs more socialising under carefully controlled conditions.

I am grateful for your very specific explanations and instructions. I have a doggie play date tomorrow with a similar-aged dog (border terrier) and will do the 20-second play, 40-sec apart and gradually upping the time.

P.S. The other time Nunuk displays the hackles-up over-excitement is when someone comes to the door. Any ideas on how to best handle that?


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## tripod (Feb 14, 2010)

Your welcome Fyfer - best of luck to you and Nanuk at your playdate. Its great that you are organising these for him.
If he is goading the other dog to get a reaction thats a time-out offence! Keep the approaches calm so that he gets to approach all the while he is calm. Stop and wait for a bit more relaxation and reward with progress toward play. All dogs, especially teenagers need help with self calming which can be taught by rewarding calming with the op to go crazy again!
Have little obedience breaks between play sessions with lots of rewards from you. So for example you might ask for three obedience behaviours, particularly ones that are naturally calming such as downs or doggie zen. If the dog finds it difficult to refocus on you invite a game of tug for 10 seconds so that his attention comes back to you and then have a calming obedience break.
I love this video for straight forward info on dog-dog play especially rude play: YouTube - Zoom Room Guide to Dog Play Gestures

The doorbell is one that is a little more complicated. We actually want our dogs to alert us to someone at the door so a certain amount of alerting is permitted but we have to control it.
If he vocalises, we can use the 3 woof rule and then ask for shush.
If he is just wound up we can teach an alternative behaviour (and a calming one) for when the door bell rings.
There is more on these exercises here (with links to step by step too): …Training is for Life « pawsitive dogs


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

tripod said:


> Its ok for you pup to play with a mix of personalities. But if you notice the other dog throwing discomfort signaling and your dog not heeding/continuing the rough play interupt if the other dog doesn't correct.
> 
> You are so right about people not recognising 'high' dogs - this state becomes addictive and the dog becomes so difficult to control.
> 
> Your pup needs lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of play opportunities. Always interrupt play sessions after about 30 seconds, get pup to refocus on you and then reward with more play. Interrupt and time out if pup is being excessively rude with another dog, especially a laid back one.


Thanks tripod, it helps a lot to see the experience perspective. I was set off thinking about this, when my Puppy shocked me by an aggressive bite reaction over a Kong stuffed with paste, he'd won by contesting against a much older Boxer pup who weighed 3x as much at the vet's puppy party socialisation class.

I tested next day for food aggression and no sign of it, and then I twigged that it was the adrenaline high, that caused it. At one stage as a small pup settling in, he had a difficult phase and played very rough and aggressive, so I was fairly hot to know more about this.

I wonder how many dogs get put down, simply because people didn't act responsibly and warily when they become over excited. Nevermind the dogs that get addicted (accidentally) as you described.

Sounds like following my instincts, and not following the general dog owner practices, is right. I will actively seek out the younger dogs, and ones same age, so there's a good mix, redressing the balance which is heavily weighted to 1 yr old dogs at present.


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## tripod (Feb 14, 2010)

RobD-BCactive said:


> Thanks tripod, it helps a lot to see the experience perspective. I was set off thinking about this, when my Puppy shocked me by an aggressive bite reaction over a Kong stuffed with paste, he'd won by contesting against a much older Boxer pup who weighed 3x as much at the vet's puppy party socialisation class.
> 
> I tested next day for food aggression and no sign of it, and then I twigged that it was the adrenaline high, that caused it. At one stage as a small pup settling in, he had a difficult phase and played very rough and aggressive, so I was fairly hot to know more about this.
> .


Even if a 'temperment test' doesn't flag resource guarding do lots and lots of preventative work especially in relation to resource guarding with other dogs. Once installed rg against other dogs is the one issue I have never completley worked to eliminate in my dog - he was a 4 year old entire male when i go him with rg well established. Sorted all the people oriented stuff but dog-dog rg is the toughest one I have encountered with him and severeal clients.


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

Seems like another reason to have him hang out with smaller and younger dogs. He has learned to give up objects without resistance to me. Bigger dogs can play with his favourite toy, without provoking an aggressive response. He's very interested, but not crossing any line that I can see.

How do you recommend, that I see if there's an issue?

Simply let another dog play with one of his favoured toys, whilst engaging my pup in play with another, is my first thought.


I think I might have to write some feedback on the "Puppy Party", at the time I commented that the stuffed Kong was "too good", but your recommendations have me thinking I should take trouble to write a constructive letter.

One trouble at time was, in the smallish room, I had no effective way to punish the aggression. If I took the dog outside, he had nice grass and trees and stuff to sniff etc. I didn't want to have a scene with my own dog and attract more attention, so I did the natural (weak) human thing, and backed off, to rethink. I was unprepared for it, so risked teaching my pup that aggression can pay.


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## tripod (Feb 14, 2010)

NEVER punish aggression - thats the first thing. Aggression has its basis in a complex emotional response and to punish the behavioural layer of that response will probably not actually punish this response (as in reduce it) but more likely cause the dog to become more worried in the situation (because in this setting you become something nasty) therefore causing the dog to use more distance increasing signaling i.e. aggression. Gosh hope that makes sense .

If there is growling or other distance increasing stuff get the dog out of the situation FAST. Then take this as a sign to teach the dog to be more comfortable in the situation.

For dog-dog rg prevention:
You can give your dog a Kong stuffed with lower value food e.g. kibble on one side of a baby gate. Have another dog approach with a handler on the other side of the gate.
Closely observe your dog for any discomfort or guarding behaviour e.g. stiffening, averted gaze, speeding up eating etc.
As soon you spot any of this have the other dog/handler stop and take a step back. Immediatley toss higher value food to your dog.
Basically better things appear any time another dog turns up. THe same routine should also be followed to prevent rg toward people. As with all socialisation it needs to be done systematically and regularly, decreasing distance as the dog becomes more and more comfortable with proximity with the perceived threat.


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

Yes, I did not intend to be nasty, but I do not think I should have stopped removing the toy. I backed down and the aggressive snaps paid off. I ought to have persisted making sure he realised it was me, who wanted him to release the toy or moved him away, even if it meant I risked taking another mildly painful bite. What I meant was to avoid rewarding the aggression, but have it not pay off.

There was no where less interesting to move to effectively.. no quiet corner. Outside was as I explained rather nice.

Complicated emotions? Don't think so here, it would be simple the adrenaline high of a win over a much larger dog, and desire to control the delicous liver tasting toy.

In hindsight, this puppy party was in too small a space, the small dogs were stressed by the larger ones, and it meant play fighting was effectively the only practical game. Throwing in a small number of Kongs, filled with Liver paste, was just asking for bouts over the resource.

Incidentally, pup met a youngish Tibetan Terrier, which was rather exciteable and barked alot. I noticed the hackles rise as a result, as described by another owner in this thread. Shame as right after calming intervention, a herd of deer showed up (they weren't the largest aggressive type) but that meant leads had to go on, and respecting the semi-wild herd means keeping dogs quiet and moving them away.

They young dogs had no issues over the toys, I just had impression the other dog had not had so much dog contact, and was more exciteable and unbalanced than my Collie.


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## Fyfer (Jan 23, 2010)

> Have little obedience breaks between play sessions with lots of rewards from you. So for example you might ask for three obedience behaviours, particularly ones that are naturally calming such as downs or doggie zen. If the dog finds it difficult to refocus on you invite a game of tug for 10 seconds so that his attention comes back to you and then have a calming obedience break.
> I love this video for straight forward info on dog-dog play especially rude play: YouTube - Zoom Room Guide to Dog Play Gestures


Tripod, I cannot fully express how very helpful this has been, along with the understanding that hackles up means over-excitement. For months I've not understood why Nunuk's hackles went up when playing.

Playdate update: Things went, basically, perfectly. Every time I saw hackles up, we (2) owners got our dogs apart and focused on us. After a minute or so, back to the other dog. Hackles up, back to owners for distraction and obedience. Hackles down, back to dog. When they finally were free together, it was for the most part calm and polite. A HUGE improvement.

There was a bit of body-slamming (Nunuk into the neighbour boy!), which got a time out, and happened just that once.

On this morning's walk we met a huge neighbour dog who was alone, no owner in sight. His hackles went up, so I called Nunuk, who'd engaged in play. I just knew it would escalate. Nunuk actually came back to me. It took a few iterations of him running back to play and being called back, and I told the other dog to go home (he did after a few times).

In sum -- THANK YOU. !!!!!!! :thumbup:

That YouTube video should be required viewing for dog owners. It's a goldmine of information in under 10 minutes.


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## Amelia_87 (Oct 15, 2008)

Thank you everyone for your helpful replies!!

I am much happier now I have had this behaviour properly explained to me, and I now understand how to calm him and make me a better 'player'! It just needs to be put into practice now with lots of time, effort and patience!! It will definitely be worth it though, I really would like him to learn to be calmer and approach many situations in a more calm manner. 

I do realise as well, I am dealing with a teenager and a dog who is going to be puppy-like until he's about 2 ish so I think I am going to have to be persistent and keep reinforcing calmness and get more involved when he's playing - not in an overbearing sense, but in the sense that I know when to step in if this get too highly charged and if he's going overboard.

I like the idea of the small play sessions and then the calm 'reward' periods as he is very good with reward based activities and exercises - it'll just be getting him to focus on me now - which he has greatly improved over time with generally, he looks at me more on walks and takes note of where I am in his vicinity. I've really noticed an improvement.

I would like to ask - how do I explain this to people who have no idea about dogs?? That woman that threatened to kick him had absolutely no idea about dog behaviour and how to deal with them - she immediately panicked and picked her dog up - which of cause heightened Casper's adrenaline/excitement levels and made the situation worse. She thought he was being aggressive, when really, he was just be overbearing and too rough - he was wagging his tail, no teeth bearing and no sign of aggression.

I am correct in reading my dogs signals or am I kind of wearing rose tinted glasses - I thought I could read him, so am I doing OK? Or am I just completely clueless?

I'm really grateful for everyone's help, I don't feel so frantic and alone now )

Amelia xxxx


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## lemmsy (May 12, 2008)

tripod said:


> Hi Amelia  First of all nothing in your description describes a 'dominant' dog - this doesn't exist. Dominance describes a relationship between two individuals established when one consistently defers in relation to possession of resources to the other.
> 
> Your dog is a Lab and a teenager and forgive me for saying is a bit obnoxious and bad mannered with other dogs
> Labs often play well with other labs but many other dogs often do not enjoy this sort of play. There are several breeds/types with pretty obnoxious play styles.
> ...


Fantastic post! Rep'd you


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

Amelia_87 said:


> She thought he was being aggressive, when really, he was just be overbearing and too rough - he was wagging his tail, no teeth bearing and no sign of aggression.
> 
> I am correct in reading my dogs signals or am I kind of wearing rose tinted glasses - I thought I could read him, so am I doing OK? Or am I just completely clueless?


Locally I could take you past a nice looking dog that will wag it's tail and looks "friendly", but if you approach will suddenly (tail still wagging) bare it's teeth and snap. The clue I can see to show that this is "anxiety" wagging, it the dogs ears, apart from those she looks fairly laid back. Her ears show she's tense, and then if approached she goes still in prepration for aggressive snapping in air.

I don't think you can blame a lady for picking up her dog, if it's small enough, she won't be a dog psychologist really know or care much about your dog, and it is tough to leave your dog on the ground, if you don't feel confident about dealing with the larger dog. Quite often holding still and turning your back helps dogs that are over-exciteable regain interest in returning to their owners, but ignore recall if there's interaction. She was probably quite anxious and frightened being approached that way, and may have had previous unpleasant experience.


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## RobD-BCactive (Jul 1, 2010)

Putting into practice the insights of this thread, I humoured a Lurcher/Wolfhound plus plus mix today, that was desribed as non-aggressive but very excitedable around other dogs.

Rather than simply allowing greeting and then going on, once the couple explained the issue they had, I suggested trying the calming method described here. My pup was game, but the other dog was twice his height, so initially he was sensibly respectful. Walking along, soon required an intervention to calm things, as the pup sensed the other dogs high energy and started acting provocative. Persistence worked, soon both dogs were calm around each other, I avoided the pup playing rough housing games, and the couple were asking where they could get one of the toys I used, which got the Wolfielurcher going full tilt after it (won't chase ordinary balls). Neither dog showed any issues caused by desire for the toys.

As next week is the pup's first obedience class, it was great practice, for being restrained and interacting with me a lot, in prescence of other more exciteable dogs.


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