# Wife wants to get rid of the dog!



## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

Hi

Looking for a bit of advice, we have a chocolate lab and my wife wants to get rid of him. We've had him about 9 months now but she's regretted getting him pretty soon after we got him. I think he's fairly well behaved for a lab pup but he likes to dig in the back garden and is generally very excitable. I don't work close to home so only get to take him out at nights, I think he'd benefit from more walks but with 2 young kids in tow she isn't that keen to do it.

Really just looking for some advice as to how to convince her he should stay. I think it would irresponsible of us to get rid of him but I don't want to get rid of him. I can understand my wife's annoyance at some of his behaviour though but the most frustrating part is she begged me to get us to buy a puppy, I guess the novelty wore off very quickly for her. Thanks.


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## Nicky09 (Feb 26, 2009)

You could tell her to try training him not to dig if thats a huge problem. Build a sandpit and hide toys and treats in there he'll dig in there and explain that labs are excitable and need a lot of exercise.


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

Personally I'd get rid of the wife!
You sound lovely though, welcome to the forum
regards
DT


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

Does sound like he is bored,not getting enough exercise, dont know how old your kids are sounds like under school age if she has to take them for walks with her, are you close to open fields, or a large park where he can be let off for a good run if time is a factor. If your kids are old enough to be taken out on a bike ride she could incorperate their bike ride with the dogs walk i know how reluctant young kids are to walk when there isnt much in it for them.If the children are old enough maybe let them throw a ball for him on the field/park, this would give him plenty of exercise and maybe entertain the kids as well.


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## Lily's Mum (Jan 22, 2009)

Aww hope you can convince your wife to keep the dog..I bet the children love the dog....

COuld you perhaps find a dog walker to come and walk the dog for an hour during the day. This would help expel the dogs energy plus give your wife some breathing space.


BTW if it was me wanting to get rid of my dog, I think the kids and OH would be booting me out lol (not that I am mentioning you should do that with your wife, definitely not.)


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

Not sure if this would be viable but have you considered hiring a dog walker.

Could take him out in the morning which might make him calmer during the day for the missus ????


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## vizzy24 (Aug 31, 2008)

HI, its a tricky one! Is she really against the dog? I would try and get her a little involved in his training, this may bring them closer if she can see he is trying to do his best for her. Also try and get him as many toys as you can to try and stop some of the behaviours that she does not like. I must admit the 9 months age is a hard age as they are starting puberty and they can be very trying!!! If you try and reassure your wife that things will get better and make it obvious that you are not getting rid of your dog without actually saying that though lol. Good luck


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

I agree i think this is the most difficult age but wont really get any better if you dont or cant meet his needs now. I agree to some degree about a dog walker, but if there are other behaviours that are a problem the discipline has to come from yourselves, allowing him to learn to obey what you or your wife says when you are out.


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## candysmum (Jan 18, 2009)

jimber said:


> Hi
> 
> Looking for a bit of advice, we have a chocolate lab and my wife wants to get rid of him. We've had him about 9 months now but she's regretted getting him pretty soon after we got him. I think he's fairly well behaved for a lab pup but he likes to dig in the back garden and is generally very excitable. I don't work close to home so only get to take him out at nights, I think he'd benefit from more walks but with 2 young kids in tow she isn't that keen to do it.
> 
> Really just looking for some advice as to how to convince her he should stay. I think it would irresponsible of us to get rid of him but I don't want to get rid of him. I can understand my wife's annoyance at some of his behaviour though but the most frustrating part is she begged me to get us to buy a puppy, I guess the novelty wore off very quickly for her. Thanks.


Ha you should see my garden I have a MASSIVE whole under the slide one by the washing line, one in the middle of the lawn, one by the fence and guess what I have 4 kids!

Dogs Dig its in their nature if they have laods of exercise and mental situlation some wont dig at all. My dogs come out with the horses but still dig. RUn with me as well but still dig. I just fill the holes back in and let them dig it again. they think its fun who and i to argue.

I think you need to get some books on the breed and hadn them to the wife.

Had this been my hubby he knows where my front door is 

Welcome to the forum. Oh i have a Dally or 10 and a greyhound. x


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## malcie5 (Oct 7, 2008)

How far away do you work? What time is walks at night? Can you really expect her to readily do something for something that she obviously has a dislike of. Okay she isnt giving him the benefit of being a puppy. Being as you work away from locality even if you entered your dog into training classes who would take the dog to these classes. l am just putting the other side of the arguement, and l am not saying l agree with you or her and can see both sides of the predicament. Do you do things together as a family (dog included) at weekends?


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## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

Thanks for all the replies, getting rid of the wife isn't an option! 

Hiring a dog walker maybe isn't a bad idea, he's lying at my feet after his early evening walk and is as placid as can be. I'm sure it's all down to too much energy and not enough to do. We have a couple of kongs we keep out with him that usually keep him busy, but we do have a big garden so there is plenty of room to dig!

She has said she is starting to resent having him around now so I'd like to get her as involved as possible. I might try the sandpit thing too, he clearly loves to dig so if we can restrict it to there it wouldn't be so bad.


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## Lily's Mum (Jan 22, 2009)

BTW My dog loves to dig too, the kids help her,,,they get their spades and they are all as happy as larry...what the heck life is too short.


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

Hi Jimber,
And welcome to the forum, you'll not my post earlier and think maybe it was a little unfriendly,, I can assure you it was not intended to be that way, it was just my feeble attempt to be jovial.

This is my serious reply, You have been given some good advise above, BUT,, I have been involved with a lot or rescues, I cannot tell you how many times I have heard the same words.
My partner doesn't want, doesn'e get on with the dog!!! And in my experience nine times out of ten the partner wins!!. I am not going to pussyfoot around on this - I do not think that there is anything your dog or yourself can do to put this right! Its a matter of convincing the O/H that a dog can and does fit well into the family given time. I have an awful feeling that whatever you do your O/H has decided that the dog is not going to play a part in your lives, and I think that tmaybe the kindest thing that you could maybe do is to look around for what should be 'a forever home' for you dog, you owe him that at least!
Sorry if I sound mean - but I don't view life through rose coloured specs!!
All the best, please stay around
DT


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## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

I work about 50 miles away so I'm up at 6 to get the train. His evening walk is some time between 7 and 7:30. Weekends aren't an issue, we have a great forest and beach nearby and we go there at least once a weekend. I take him out in the mornings too, to a nice muddy field which I think annoys the wife even more as he comes home covered in mud. It's the best place to let him run off his energy though and he gets a hose down and brush before he gets back in the house.

She's agreed to try a few things but wants me to say that if they don't work he's gone and I just can't agree to that. Ah the joys of marriage!

Oh and thanks for the warm welcome!


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

Where are you located?


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## candysmum (Jan 18, 2009)

jimber said:


> I work about 50 miles away so I'm up at 6 to get the train. His evening walk is some time between 7 and 7:30. Weekends aren't an issue, we have a great forest and beach nearby and we go there at least once a weekend. I take him out in the mornings too, to a nice muddy field which I think annoys the wife even more as he comes home covered in mud. It's the best place to let him run off his energy though and he gets a hose down and brush before he gets back in the house.
> 
> She's agreed to try a few things but wants me to say that if they don't work he's gone and I just can't agree to that. Ah the joys of marriage!
> 
> Oh and thanks for the warm welcome!


well i have to say i think you have been well adn truly MOBBED!!!!


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## Lily's Mum (Jan 22, 2009)

How old are the kids? Surely they don't want the dog to go?

Get them to persuade the wife lol


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## Shazach (Dec 18, 2008)

DoubleTrouble said:


> Hi Jimber,
> And welcome to the forum, you'll not my post earlier and think maybe it was a little unfriendly,, I can assure you it was not intended to be that way, it was just my feeble attempt to be jovial.
> 
> This is my serious reply, You have been given some good advise above, BUT,, I have been involved with a lot or rescues, I cannot tell you how many times I have heard the same words.
> ...


I'm afraid i agree with DT. If your wife has made up her mind, then it may well be kinder for him to find him a new home whilst he's young enough to cope with the change.
Puppy's are hard work, but they are hard work for the first couple of years, so there's some time to go yet. And if the rewards don't make up for that for your family, then perhaps you need to think about rehoming.
I sincerely hope things work out for the best for you all.

Sh x


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## LittleMissSunshine (Aug 31, 2008)

I'd reccomend getting the wife (as divorce isn't an option) as involved with the dog as possible, at weekends go to training clases as a family, ket the ids involved in the feeding/playing etc... I see lots of families oiut on bikes near me tiring out the dogs AND having quality family time together, it really needent be a chore however reluctant an owner your wife may be.....

Are there any responsible teenagers who might like the extra pocket money to walk the pup?????

I hope you find a solution xxxx

Welcome to the mob...I mean forum! xxxx


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

I think DT has made some good points. If your wife has got to that point you really are going to struggle to turn it around and she has got to WANT things to work.


I really think that a dog walker to start with is a good move.

What about a kennel and run in the garden. If introduced properly it could mean the dog has a nice long walk with dog walker in the morning and then into the kennel for a sleep then a frozen kong or two, that would cover most of the day and get the dog out from under her feet.


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## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

DoubleTrouble said:


> Where are you located?


Fife but work in Edinburgh, hence the commute.

The kids are 3 and 4, the eldest especially loves playing with the pup and would be heart broken if he was to go.

I do feel like I'm fighting a losing battle but I honestly think she'd regret getting rid of him.


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## malcie5 (Oct 7, 2008)

Tend to agree with DT on this one, and DT why not put it how it is. l admire people for that, and at least you do it in a way that is not nasty and nobody could try to say it was. Good for you


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

Opps - was going to offer to help walk if you were local!!!!


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## LittleMissSunshine (Aug 31, 2008)

jimber said:


> Fife but work in Edinburgh, hence the commute.
> 
> The kids are 3 and 4, the eldest especially loves playing with the pup and would be heart broken if he was to go.
> 
> I do feel like I'm fighting a losing battle but I honestly think she'd regret getting rid of him.


I think she probably would too..... get the gwen baily perfect puppy book, while he is 9 months it does give great advice about general discipline etc.....xxxxx


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

LittleMissSunshine said:


> I think she probably would too..... get the gwen baily perfect puppy book, while he is 9 months it does give great advice about general discipline etc.....xxxxx


I bought that !!
Too busy on here controlling the MOB and dealing with my delinquent Cocker Spaniel Pup to read it


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## LittleMissSunshine (Aug 31, 2008)

rainy said:


> I bought that !!
> Too busy on here controlling the MOB and dealing with my delinquent Cocker Spaniel Pup to read it


whaddya mean delinquent cocker??? mine's an angel!!!!! She look like the one in my avatar though:ciappa:

Ok, hijack over!!!


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## Shazach (Dec 18, 2008)

jimber said:


> Fife but work in Edinburgh, hence the commute.
> 
> The kids are 3 and 4, the eldest especially loves playing with the pup and would be heart broken if he was to go.
> 
> I do feel like I'm fighting a losing battle but I honestly think she'd regret getting rid of him.


I'm sorry this is a horrible situation for you. But if your wife sees how much the kids love him, does this not make her want to keep him for them?


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## Guest (Mar 24, 2009)

LittleMissSunshine said:


> whaddya mean delinquent cocker??? mine's an angel!!!!! She look like the one in my avatar though:ciappa:
> 
> Ok, hijack over!!!


read my thread to tug or not to tug


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## haeveymolly (Mar 7, 2009)

jimber said:


> Fife but work in Edinburgh, hence the commute.
> 
> The kids are 3 and 4, the eldest especially loves playing with the pup and would be heart broken if he was to go.
> 
> I do feel like I'm fighting a losing battle but I honestly think she'd regret getting rid of him.


Why cant our wife, walk the dog and the kids if they are that age, if you live near a beach what agreat place to take 2 kids and a dog, shes very lucky.


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## rubyandlola (Jan 20, 2009)

It does sound like he needs a walk in the day...I have young kids and also a chilminder so I know how hard it is to walk a dog and control the kids at the same time but it is poss, I put mine in the double buggy and put the lead on the handle although I have a king charles spainel so half the size of your dog. When the weather is bad it's a nightmare to take the kids out so my friend pops over to sit with the kids for half an hour so I can take the dog out without having to drag the kids out in bad weather! It sounds like you need to hfind a way to help your wife bond with the dog...have you suggested puppy training classes, it would help her if she felt she had control over the dog other than the other way round. It does seem a shame to re-home the dog when it's only your wife that has an issue with her, if the kids love her then they will find it hard, its so good for kids to have a pet around and I think your right she will regret getting rid of the dog. How about reminding your wife the reasons why she wanted to get a dog in the first place? I'm sure with a mid day walk and some training your wife would bond and feel better. I don't really know what else to suggest as our dog is small and that makes things alot easier for me with the kids around. I hope it all works out for you xx


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## LostGirl (Jan 16, 2009)

I would maybe get up little earlier and take him out, at 3yrs and 4yrs old the kids are old enough to walk around with the dog our they at pre-school/school? we walk our pup up to school when OH is home but if hes not me and the kids walk him at 8 so hes had a wee and poop before school. 

My children are also 3yrs and 4yrs old and we dont have a enclosed garden, It is hard but i knew that before we got him. Get her in to training him its lovely to see a pup doing things you've asked it makes you proud lol


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## foxxy cleopatra (Nov 18, 2008)

make her watch this:
YouTube - How could you - will actually make you cry


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## Acacia86 (Dec 30, 2008)

Hi, and welcome first!!

I had a similar problem when my ex partner decided to go out and 'see' a litter of Lab puppies. He came home with one. I loved him dearly (the dog i mean !) But my ex had to work 8 hours a day minimum and did overtime most. I had a huge row with him about irresponsible dog ownership! I am not saying that you are i am just telling my story! You do not sound like that, in fact the way i take it you are responsible, after a days work you still walk yours x

Anyway it was obviously down to me, because i work from home. I found at this age of your pup it was difficult, you seem to be rid of the ''naughty'' behaviour as he grows then it comes back in adolesence!!
I found doing more things with our Lab helped. I looked after a 2 year old at this time and i found they really enjoyed going to the beach, park, common land etc with ours!

I also took him to evening classes which even you could do. I even bought agilty items and put them up in our back garden and taught him myself!

I would also recommend throwing bits of his food (if its dry) of treats on the lawn and tell him to find them, it works the mind. As dogs need physical and mental stimulation. 

Sorry for the long post, i hope you sort it soon for all your benefits.

Aca
x


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## candysmum (Jan 18, 2009)

foxxy cleopatra said:


> make her watch this:
> YouTube - How could you - will actually make you cry


oh that made me cry!


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## foxxy cleopatra (Nov 18, 2008)

candysmum said:


> oh that made me cry!


yep! me too, it was posted on there AGES ago.....it is so so so sad


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## Acacia86 (Dec 30, 2008)

foxxy cleopatra said:


> make her watch this:
> YouTube - How could you - will actually make you cry


I have just cried my eyes out. And am still doing so..............


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## foxxy cleopatra (Nov 18, 2008)

it makes me want to adopt dogs.....


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## Acacia86 (Dec 30, 2008)

foxxy cleopatra said:


> it makes me want to adopt dogs.....


Me too. But i found it hard working with rescue's! I would try and take them all home! 
x


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## casey (Mar 20, 2009)

I have only read the 1st 2 pages, and skipped to the last page of replies, so forgive me if I repeat what others have said.. or have missed something.. 

Everyone has stated that more exercise is the answer, unfortunately with Labradors this is not the best way..The pups is only 9 months old and and this stage.. over excersising hips, could lead to envorinmental hip dysplacia.. probably wont happen, but not worth the risk.. 

something I completely missed in any posts was training.. have you taken pup to classes, Brain draining, tires a Labrador way better than walking excersises etc.. a couple of 15mins sessions during the day, can have a Lab pleasantly tired and dozing for a few hours.. 

Children can also be the cause of excitement, and a Lab will want to play.. especially a 9month old puppy, who by the way.. will be in complete delinquent Kevin mode at this age.. and can stay in juvenille deliquency until around 18months.. 

I often wonder why people choose Labradors as the family pet.. they are not for the fainthearted.. they need working.. they have a brain.. and if we dont use it.. they will.. and runs rings round us.. rescues are full of young Labradors, most of them under a year old.. 

Another thing I havent noticed, is any mention of the breeder, if you really do think of re-homing.. Please contact your breeder (assuming pup was purchased from a decent breeder) who should be more than willing to take pup back.. 

I am afraid that if your wife really does have her mind made up,, then she will begin to resent you, if you force her to keep the pup, or resent the pup.. neither is a good situation to be in.. 

If you do decide to keep going for a while with pup.. I wish you luck, but also advise training classes, including the children.. It doesnt have to be your wife who does all the work.. Children can be very involved in all the training aspects of the pup.. and Fun 

I wish you luck.. but please.. speak to the breeder, she should be there to guide and help you.. she is responsible from bring pup into being in the 1st place..


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## Badger's Mum (Mar 23, 2009)

3yr's ago i had a lovely garden. then came along a jr springer and a lab. hence no more flower.s or veg, have got a tuff of grass tho.I look at it like when my kid's were young it does get better:yesnod:. Give ur lab load's of toy's to play with, maybe if you havn't got time it would be kinder to give the dog to someone who has the time! :yesnod:i'd help the wife pack her bag's if it was me tho:yesnod:


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## Guest (Mar 25, 2009)

I still think a run in the garden and time spent with a dog walker (doesn't have to be walking, could be playing) would be a good start because it gets dog out from under your wifes feet.

A run also restricts the damage in the garden, you could put a sandpit in the run.


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## Guest (Mar 25, 2009)

Hi

Well i have just sat and read this through.

I echo what DT has said - if your wife has really definatly decided that he has to go, the best thing for him would be to find him a forever home. 

IF you think there is a chance of winning her round, then seriously consider some of the other posters suggestions. 

I would also like to point out that casey is right, he shouldnt be over exercised at the moment, but instead of a dog walker, he could go to puppy creche. A few of the local dog walkers here also run puppy daytime creches - perhaps having a run and play with other puppies might help him use up some of that energy. One of our local creches, is also very good at teaching obedience too, and there are older steady dogs from them to learn from aswell. Its a fab service and one that could suit you well!

I would also be tempted to split his one evening walk into two. Get up an hour earlier and take him out with you. If this becomes routine he'll adapt to whatever the time is and be ready for his walk. It should also mean he's run off alot of that early morning bouncy puppy mode, and have a nice long snooze while the mrs is getting the kids up dressed and fed. If he has a crate, it would be great for you to walk him in the morning and then crate him for an hour while sheis getting sorted. 

You mentioned that you have a large garden, so why not use a little fence and make an area just for him. He can do his business there, and also dig it over to his hearts content. It may save your wifes anguish over the pretty lawn, or prized roses. 

The crate may also help with some of the other yet unspoken issues you might be having. Kids are great at feeding the dogs their food! Then the dogs see it as ok, and get caught pinching the food from kids hands. The children need to be taught thats this isnt acceptable, and so does the dog. If he was in his crate at your mealtimes it would alleviate that situation.

I have young children and am on my own. Mine are 2 and 4. If your wife could see that he was calming down, and if you took him to training classes on an evening, perhaps his lead walking owuld be better, and he could accompany them to the park. 

i really feel for you, 

xx


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## Sleeping_Lion (Mar 19, 2009)

Did your wife want the pup in the first place? Labs love attention, any attention, and can be quite demanding. 

If it's really getting too much to have him loose round the house and garden, then I'd consider setting him up a run outside where he can settle for part of the day. Possibly have a look at his diet, if he's on a food that's got a lot of additives in it could be sending him a bit loopy, a bit like kids drinking too much cola, and eating too many sweets.

Dogs don't need the legs walking off them to make them tired and compliant, they just need structured training and exercise, it works much better if you wear their brain out, so I'd consider some sort of training classes for him. I've done working trials and gundog training with both my chocolate girls, and they love 'doing' anything! Its actually the dog owner/handler who usually needs to learn more about reading their dog(s), and you usually find (if you're anything like me) you've been doing it all wrong and have to unlearn and retrain a lot of things :blush:

If you do get to the point where you decide to rehome him, then please get in touch with a labrador rescue organisation, they'll help find the perfect home for him.


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## Dylan & Daisy (Feb 4, 2009)

No advice really but Welcome to the forum


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## Guest (Mar 25, 2009)

Ill have to agree with some of the previous posts advising you to consider re-homing the dog...
Did your wife really want the dog at the first place?
A dog needs to be in a dog-loving home, if your wife is not too keen on having a dog at the first place its probably better not to have one really...people are either dog-lovers or are not... if the puppy face hasnt changed her mind after 7 months I dont really see what can...
And since she is the one who will have to spend most of the time with him during the day (if i understood right) then she really should be committed if you want to keep him and make him happy!
The other posts give you very good advice but a dog is for 10 years or so..if she is "bored" after 7 months or so it doesnt bode well in my view!

Good luck whatever you choose to do!

xx


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## Dundee (Oct 20, 2008)

> I can understand my wife's annoyance at some of his behaviour though but the most frustrating part is she begged me to get us to buy a puppy, I guess the novelty wore off very quickly for her.


I think the answer is that she wanted the puppy, but the reality of it is not what she expected. Sadly, I agree with those who say it would be better to find this puppy a forever home. I do feel for you, you obviously care and are responsible and only you know exactly how committed (or not) your wife is to making this work, but she should be under no illusion that puppies are hard work. If she cannot accept this and is prepared to put the work in, then rehome him to people who can.


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## jenniferx (Jan 23, 2009)

I think the best way forward is communication. Talking to one another at a neutral time when everyone is calm, no blame or dramatic ultimatums and see if there is a way that you both might be able to compromise. She wanted the dog once upon a time ... See if there are any circumstances that she would be happy with the dog, what precisely needs 'fixed' about the situation etc... Might it be other factors in her lifestyle at the minute that are inflaming her feelings that could well change down the line? (ie: is she really stressed at the minute in other areas/ways). 

Whilst she may resent you for wanting to keep him, it cuts both ways. You're also likely to resent her to some extent for giving you no options either. I reckon the best way forward is for the both of you to understand where each other are coming from and then making a fully informed decision thereafter with the dog's best interests at heart.


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## mistique57 (Feb 22, 2009)

I also have to agree with dt maybe finding the dog a forever home would be the best option.


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## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

Sorry I've neglected this thread but been busy. Anyhoo, I've started getting up half an hour early and taking Marv out for a quick run about. This seems to calm him down for when the wife and kids come down for brekkie and he's happy to chill in the back garden for a while. She's agreed to take him out once a day and with the early morning run around and the usual evening walk it'll be 3 walks a day which should be good. They're not long walk as we were told for the first year to restrict his exercise. 

We went to the pet store last night and bought him some activity toys and chews to keep him occupied, unfortunately he's wrecked one already. He chewed it to pieces in no time, despite the fact this was marketed as a tough toy for chewers! So if anyone has recommendations for toys that are actually tough, please let me know!

She's admitted the problem is really her and not the dog, so to make life easier we bought a cable thing that still lets him have the run of half the garden. It's mainly bark down there, and a bit of grass but he actually seemed quite chilled when he's on it. He still likes to dig so we'll head to b&q at the weekend and buy a sandpit for him and bury treats in it, praise him when he digs there and if we catch him digging elsewhere we'll just bring him over to the sandpit to play in.

We had a good chat last night and we agreed the things above to try and keep him more occupied/tire him out more. I'm hoping it works, and I made sure if was the mrs who gave him his big chew bone last night. I'm hoping by taking him out more she'll build a strong bond with him as he is an ace dog. My parents always had dogs so I knew how hard work it would be, this is her first dog and she has admitted she was in love with the idea of owning a dog but naive about the actual realities of owning the dog. Lastly, and I think this may be the clincher, our two sons actually made up a song about Marvin and how cute he was, how much they loved him and wanted him to stay. She blamed me for it, but it was all their own doing! I'm feeling more confident than I was when I originally posted. Thanks for all the advice, I'll definitely hang around and let you know his progress!

Sorry for the long post, I'm done now.


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## Guest (Mar 26, 2009)

jimber said:


> Sorry I've neglected this thread but been busy. Anyhoo, I've started getting up half an hour early and taking Marv out for a quick run about. This seems to calm him down for when the wife and kids come down for brekkie and he's happy to chill in the back garden for a while. She's agreed to take him out once a day and with the early morning run around and the usual evening walk it'll be 3 walks a day which should be good. They're not long walk as we were told for the first year to restrict his exercise.
> 
> We went to the pet store last night and bought him some activity toys and chews to keep him occupied, unfortunately he's wrecked one already. He chewed it to pieces in no time, despite the fact this was marketed as a tough toy for chewers! So if anyone has recommendations for toys that are actually tough, please let me know!
> 
> ...


Sounds like a GREAT plan. Glad we helped :thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:

Gotta love kids haven't you


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## JSR (Jan 2, 2009)

Fab news, well done for all you've done!!! Your kids rule...way to go making mum feel guilty!!!:thumbup:


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## Guest (Mar 26, 2009)

toys

* Kongs - you can get extra strong ones - theyre black Stuff them with all manner of treats and then freeze - should keep him occupied for ages

* boomer ball for the garden for him to kick about and chase

* raw meaty bones. Hooves/pigs ears etc

* buster cubes (or similr) make him work for his treats

* BIG ice-cubes for the garden. Make in tupperwear with diluted stock. Dogs love em, they taste good, great for chewey teethy pups and good fun to kick around and slide about after.

I've only got a small pup lol, so thats only a starter list. I'm sure someone with bigger dogs will be along to reccomend some good toys to occupy his mind and his time


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## Shazach (Dec 18, 2008)

jimber said:


> Sorry I've neglected this thread but been busy. Anyhoo, I've started getting up half an hour early and taking Marv out for a quick run about. This seems to calm him down for when the wife and kids come down for brekkie and he's happy to chill in the back garden for a while. She's agreed to take him out once a day and with the early morning run around and the usual evening walk it'll be 3 walks a day which should be good. They're not long walk as we were told for the first year to restrict his exercise.
> 
> We went to the pet store last night and bought him some activity toys and chews to keep him occupied, unfortunately he's wrecked one already. He chewed it to pieces in no time, despite the fact this was marketed as a tough toy for chewers! So if anyone has recommendations for toys that are actually tough, please let me know!
> 
> ...


Really, really pleased to hear this. Well done you and the Mrs, sounds like you're both going to try and make this work and obviously communicate well with each other!
Would love to hear how you get along. Thank you for updating us, you've put a big smile on my face! 
Sh x


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## Guest (Mar 26, 2009)

billyboysmammy said:


> toys
> 
> * Kongs - you can get extra strong ones - theyre black Stuff them with all manner of treats and then freeze - should keep him occupied for ages
> 
> ...


I love your tips they always give me a new idea


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## vizzy24 (Aug 31, 2008)

Thats great news, hope it all works out for you all


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## Nina (Nov 2, 2007)

Looking at this from the dogs perspective, I would suggest that you take him to a reputable re homing centre.

Your wife obviously has no time for the poor little chap, and in my opinion he would be far better off living with a family that can offer him the walks, care, love and attention that he deserves.

Sorry if that sounds a bit harsh, but from what you say, it would be the best thing for him.


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## reddogs (Feb 6, 2009)

Well done for talking to your wife, hopefully if she is spending more 'constructive' rather than destructive time with Marv by taking him out then she will find life a bit easier. You haven't said anything about external dog training, do you go to classes? it is probably worth involving the whole family in doing something like that, imagine how proud they will all be if he passes his good citizens tests or companion dog ones and as he gets older then there are more things you can all do together - agility, caniX etc etc


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## jimber (Mar 24, 2009)

Nina said:


> Looking at this from the dogs perspective, I would suggest that you take him to a reputable re homing centre.
> 
> Your wife obviously has no time for the poor little chap, and in my opinion he would be far better off living with a family that can offer him the walks, care, love and attention that he deserves.
> 
> Sorry if that sounds a bit harsh, but from what you say, it would be the best thing for him.


It is harsh as it's only my wife who has issues with the dog. The other 3 of us love him and give him plenty of attention. He's now getting 3 walks a day and we've always gone somewhere different with him at the weekends, be it a forest walk, beach walk etc. We're still learning as a family how to cope with having a dog in the house, and I'm hoping that although it's taking longer for my wife to cope that he'll be around for many years to come.

I particularly object to you saying we don't care for him, we've probably been guilty of taking him to the vet too often to get little things checked out that are normal for pups but we wanted to err on the side of caution.


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## gilly145 (Oct 19, 2008)

Jimber, you are doing everything you can for your pup and I think you are doing really well.

Hopefully your wife will fall more in love with him, it is really hard work with a puppy but apparently it gets easier as they get older!! I think its great that you are working out what is best for the dog and you as a family - well done!! Don't let one harsh comment get you down, just carry on as you are concentrating on your family (including your the new member!!)

Wish you all best of luck!

G
x


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## LabWorld (Mar 5, 2009)

Hi Jimber

I have a 2 year old chocolate Lab (male) myself. They are hard work when they are young and we too had problems at first. The way around it is LOTS of exercise. Mental and physical. I realise that time can be a major issue here but a well exercised Lab is a happy Lab and a lot more fun to live with. We have to remember that these are intelligent working dogs and they need to be challenged mentally and physically. Some good training will satisfy the need for mental stimulation. Keep it short and have fun.

I often struggle to find the time during a busy working week. If I feel that he hasn't had enough exercise during the week, I always make a point of taking Monty on a very long walk (2 hours or so) on the weekends. 

Stick with it! They do calm down eventually I promise :biggrin5:

Best of luck!


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## Guest (Mar 26, 2009)

LabWorld said:


> Hi Jimber
> 
> I have a 2 year old chocolate Lab (male) myself. They are hard work when they are young and we too had problems at first. The way around it is LOTS of exercise. Mental and physical. I realise that time can be a major issue here but a well exercised Lab is a happy Lab and a lot more fun to live with. We have to remember that these are intelligent working dogs and they need to be challenged mentally and physically. Some good training will satisfy the need for mental stimulation. Keep it short and have fun.
> 
> ...


A two hour walk IMO is two long for a 9 month old lab! Stimulation is other ways - yes - but do not be tempted to walk a 9month old for that length of time
DT


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## LabWorld (Mar 5, 2009)

Yes sorry, my fault! I should have pointed that out. I was simply mentioning what I do personally but it could have been taken the wrong way. Give it three months or so before attempting the first canine assault on the north face of Everest


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## thumbs (Mar 4, 2009)

how old does a dog have to be to get neutered? would that calm him down a bit?


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

2 hours walks sounds reasonable for a week-end walk for a 9months old lab! it just depends what you do on the walk..if its a nice walk in the forest that can only be great for the dog.
Personnally I take my 10months old SBT out for about 1hr and a half everyday and take a real long walk during the week-end (in the forest ), and if I didnt do that he would be running wild in the house anyway 

A dog can be neutered as early as 6 months I think...although neutering doesnt always give the expected results..but I think it does tend to calm the dog down!

Jimber - Im glad to hear you've worked things out with your wife for the time being but I must admit I am a bit sceptical...dog owners have to be really committed in my opinion...dogs will affect family time, holiday time, the vet bills can be very costly, there could be behaviour issues to be taken care of, they demands time, patience, long walks even during the winter, in the snow and the rain  if you are not all 100% committed to the dog (the good times AND the bad times) you may run into serious trouble eventually and it would be sad to have to rehome the dog when hes a couple of years old!
Sorry for the pessimism but its my opinion that not everybody is " dog owner material" and its a huge commitment that cannot be taken lightly and shouldnt be "forced" in any way on someone.
Having said that I do hope that your wife becomes a true dog lover and that you will all enjoy many years with him! 

xx


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## Trevs_mum (Jan 5, 2009)

Hi there,

I've had a read throught the posts, and just wanted to say well done, for sitting down and talking about it! You obviously love your wife and dog very much!!

I just wanted to add, that after a couple of months of havving a little terror of an English bull terrier my OH wanted to get rid of him (sometimes I wonder if he got a little jealous too, as all my attention was going to the dog) Well we've worked hard with him and we adopted our second little girlie a couple of weeks ago. So don't worry, you can work through it!!

Best of luck

ju xx


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

I have asked on here about neutering before and the general opinion was it is best to let them mature (about 18 months 2 years) and there is little evidence except anecdotal to suggest it calms them down.


Good job there aren't re homing centres for children they would be fit to bursting if everyone threw in the towel when it got too tough 

Glad you are working on it :thumbup1:


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## Lily's Mum (Jan 22, 2009)

rainy said:


> I have asked on here about neutering before and the general opinion was it is best to let them mature (about 18 months 2 years) and there is little evidence except anecdotal to suggest it calms them down.
> 
> Good job there aren't re homing centres for children they would be fit to bursting if everyone threw in the towel when it got too tough
> 
> Glad you are working on it :thumbup1:


How about homes for OH's?


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## Izzie999 (Nov 27, 2008)

DoubleTrouble said:


> Hi Jimber,
> And welcome to the forum, you'll not my post earlier and think maybe it was a little unfriendly,, I can assure you it was not intended to be that way, it was just my feeble attempt to be jovial.
> 
> This is my serious reply, You have been given some good advise above, BUT,, I have been involved with a lot or rescues, I cannot tell you how many times I have heard the same words.
> ...


Hi,

I totally agree with DT on this one, I have had it with my hubby and the cats and in the past I have given in and parted with a much loved pet Im ashamed to say. Nowadays I basically turn a blind eye and he now knows I won't back down just for him.

I think the dog walker idea sounds brilliant, if he is just out for an extra hour or couple of hours a day then he will be out of her hair, did she originally want a dog or was she talked round lol? This could have a lot to do with her attitude. If it was a family decision to get the dog then Im sorry she has to try harder. Why should you give up your dog for your wife, there must be ways you can enjoy the dog as a family. I would love a dog but hubby absolutely hates them (more than cats) and it would be doomed to failure from day one and so unfair on the dog.

You sound very sensible I am sure with a bit of work,possibly puppy classes with your wife doing them as well then she will start to enjoy dog ownership.

Best of luck.

Izzie


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

Lily's Mum said:


> How about homes for OH's?


I have his name down for the old people home think he can go at 50, just 10 more years 

There again i might need help with my incontinence pants by then (may have to rethink )


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

Someone has mentioned castration - Please do not even consider getting your boy done until he has fully matured, With a lab I would add a bit more on even and say absolute min eighteen months, and there is not guarantee that this will calm him down even.
! know the OP did not ask this question - just covering it as it has been brought up
regards
DT


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## Lily's Mum (Jan 22, 2009)

DoubleTrouble said:


> Someone has mentioned castration - Please do not even consider getting your boy done until he has fully matured, With a lab I would add a bit more on even and say absolute min eighteen months, and there is not guarantee that this will calm him down even.
> ! know the OP did not ask this question - just covering it as it has been brought up
> regards
> DT


Have you shown a pic of your store cupboard?


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

Lily's Mum said:


> Have you shown a pic of your store cupboard?


:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

too busy repeating me


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

Lily's Mum said:


> Have you shown a pic of your store cupboard?


No - going to take a piccy of my collar and lead store as I am afraid some people are maybe a teeny weeny little bit fed up of looking at my foodstore! But got to pick the grandkids up from school so have not time now
DT


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2009)

Phew think i got away with that one


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