# Can’t cope with my new puppy



## Gem1307 (Jan 13, 2018)

So here goes....I feel so guilty writing this but I’m really really struggling with my new puppy. He’s a 13 week old springer spaniel puppy called Bruce. I love him dearly but he is so hard work and I was prepared at all for what having a new puppy brings. I feel like I don’t get one minutes peace if he’s not biting me or the kids, he’s trying to eat something he shouldn’t, pooing all over the house, eating every single thing he can get his mouth round, biting my furniture, the lost goes on. I take him out and he just eats stuff off the floor, I took him out earlier, I had to prise his mouth open to get a bit of plastic out of his mouth, he ate about 3 clumps of mud and grass, lol proper clumps of mud, a couple of bits of card board, I couldn’t get his mouth open to get them out at all, And I end up getting that stressed that I bring him home. Unless he’s asleep cuddling into me I’m not finding him enjoyable at all. I can’t even sit and have a brew for 2 mins without him doing something he shouldn’t and I have to get up!! 

I feel terrible for feeling this way and it’s making me and my partner argue but he isn’t here all day coz he’s at work and dealing with that with the dog and 2 young children is bloody hard work. When he comes home from work I feel like walking out and leaving him to see what it’s like. 

Has anyone else ever felt like this? Does it get better?


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## Darkangelwitch (Mar 16, 2016)

Puppies are hard work but if you can get through the baby stage things will improve.

Have a look at the Puppy Support thread to get some ideas on what might help you.

https://www.petforums.co.uk/threads/puppy-support-thread.448113/

To be honest it sounds like puppy is bored, you need to find things to keep him occupied (you should get ideas from the above link).


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## MissSpitzMum (Dec 4, 2017)

I felt like that, and it does get better. Puppies are overwhelming, high energy puppies especially so.

I will just add though don't prize things out of his mouth, that can lead to him either guarding items or swallowing things as quickly as possible even if they aren't edible. To get him to drop something waft a tasty goody in front of his nose and say 'drop!' in a happy way. Toss the treat a little bit away from the item (so he can't run back to grab it!) and heap on the praise. If its something that isn't dangerous or valuable, I personally would just let him have it as dogs can also learn to steal things for attention.


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## Gem1307 (Jan 13, 2018)

Darkangelwitch said:


> Puppies are hard work but if you can get through the baby stage things will improve.
> 
> Have a look at the Puppy Support thread to get some ideas on what might help you.
> 
> ...


I feel like I do loads with him though, we do training a few times a day and we started puppy training last week and the trainer said we were doing a cab job with him and she can tell we spend the time with him. I get him out a couple of times a day, we play scent games, play with his toys. So if he's bored then I don't know how I can do much more with him, feel like I'm doing the best I can in that sense.


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## MissSpitzMum (Dec 4, 2017)

Does he have kongs, treat balls, wobblers? Some hands off (for you) activity toys might give you that much needed break.


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## Gem1307 (Jan 13, 2018)

MissSpitzMum said:


> Does he have kongs, treat balls, wobblers? Some hands off (for you) activity toys might give you that much needed break.


Yea I have a KONG for him, I've got the dog peanut butter to put in it and the paste from pets and home both of which he isn't fussed with, I put treats, chicken inside but he seems to get them out so fast. Is there any other suggestions for putting inside, more like a spread or paste that he can't get out as fast?


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

It’s not just about wearing them out but teaching them to settle too.

Have you a safe area he can go for quiet time - maybe a filled Kong to keep him occupied until he falls asleep for a nap?

Over tired pups are as bad as over tired toddlers 

Are you also getting him used to bring left alone? Build up gradually so there is no anxiety (set him up for success with a nice walk, radio on, kong, blinds down, safe restricted area, etc.

That gives you a break too


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## kimthecat (Aug 11, 2009)

If you haven't already you could put up some dog or baby gates to restrict his access to the rest of the house or pop him into a puppy pen or crate if you cant supervise. .


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## Picklelily (Jan 2, 2013)

I can tell you it definitely gets better, I'm one of those people who likes other peoples puppies but hasn't enjoyed my own. I'm not surprised you feel worn out with 2 young children and a puppy that's a full-time job and a half. Try getting a schedule set so that your partner can do some of the work with either the puppy or the children in the morning and evening. I did fnd clicker training was great for wearing a puppy out quickly also get a crate and/or a puppy playpen so that puppy can safely play whilst you sit for a minute x

Most of all though know it gets better and eventually, they enhance your life x


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

What are you giving him to chew on? When my dog was a puppy she was pretty high energy and didn't sleep much during the day. I tried to encourage her to chew on toys, plastic bones etc, but she quickly grew bored with them. Then I discovered calf hooves (not the filled kind) which I got from Zooplus in the dog chew part. These kept her amused for ages and as chewing is sophorific for dogs, she would have a good snooze afterwards which allowed me to have a cup of tea in peace.
If you can get through the next few weeks I promise you that things will improve. The puppy stage is a nightmare at times and it's the not having a moment just to sit down and zone out that is so hard. Once the puppy is able to amuse itself or sleep for a longer time during the day then it starts to get better.


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## Teddy-dog (Nov 2, 2017)

I was going to suggest brain games, something he has to do himself and work out himself. You still have to put the effort into making the 'game' but it can keep them occupied for a while. There's a FB group I've joined, Canine Enrichment and they have lots of ideas on there, might be worth a look? Snufflemats are good. Start easy and then build up to hard challenging things that might keep them occupied for longer. 

Also agree with the don't prize things out of his mouth. Work on a good 'leave it' or drop command at home. If your dog won't leave that try swapping for a high value treat as suggested above.


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## Guest (Jan 22, 2018)

Re the Kong: I put chopped carrot, banana, the liver paste or peanut butter, and a selection of broken dog biscuits. But I jam it down to the end with a blunt stick and sometimes freeze it. That way it takes much longer to finish. Also, the Kong bone is very long lasting. It is shaped like a hollow bone with holes in, and eventually your pup will learn to take it to the top of the stairs and throw it down, so the treats all bounce out (!) but that is advanced thinking, and it took my dog a several weeks to master.


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## MissSpitzMum (Dec 4, 2017)

Gem1307 said:


> Yea I have a KONG for him, I've got the dog peanut butter to put in it and the paste from pets and home both of which he isn't fussed with, I put treats, chicken inside but he seems to get them out so fast. Is there any other suggestions for putting inside, more like a spread or paste that he can't get out as fast?


Freezing the contents helps alot to slow them down. My own dog will do the 'pick it up and drop it' method for anything dry, so that ends fast. I assume since yours gets his out so quickly he's probably doing something similar.

There are plenty of recipe ideas for kongs on the interwebs. In my experience (I have a picky dog though) cottage cheese or some sort of meat paste worked best, with a chew stuck in the middle. I froze them and he had to work to get the frozen food, and also had a chew at the end of it.

My dog also absolutely LOVED lollipops. I got a plastic picnic cup, filled it with water, then popped lots of treats inside that both floated and didn't float, then I shoved a chewie in the centre as the 'stick.' I froze that and he went nuts for it, was there licking it for ages. You can make larger ones too, I made a whole layered version in a bowl with meat paste, gravy flavoured water (no onions), chickens feet. It kept him busy for a good few hours. Makes a hell of a mess though!

If he's fed dry food, you can put that into Kong Wobblers or activity treat balls, both of which will keep them busy for a while. If he's fed wet you can put that into a kong and freeze it. If he's fed raw, I've known people to put it into easily cleaned puzzles. I can also highly recommend the Buster Activity Mat, great if you can put their dinner in it, also great to just keep them busy for a bit while you have that much needed cup of coffee!


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## TennoAkita (Jul 28, 2012)

My brother recently went through the same with his French bulldog pup. I went through similar years ago. Is this your first dog/pup?

I’d suggest a crate with a play pen attached to it so the pup has his own area where you can “put him away” for him to relax and chew on something.


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## Jamesgoeswalkies (May 8, 2014)

Firstly make sure you have a baby gate or play pen so you can separate off an area from you and the children. Ensure this area is puppy proofed (nothing he can damage himself on) and whenever you need a break (and puppies are a full time job - and even more so if you have kids as well) pop puppy into his play area with some of the suggestions above (Kongs/chews/toys etc) and go and have a cup of tea. It also teaches puppy to cope on his own.

Yes, we give puppies a good routine of walkies and playtime and training time but it's just as important to teach them 'quiet time' (when they won't get any attention at all from you). And their quiet time means we get quiet time too.

It's normal behaviour though ...you just have to get through this stage 

J


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## Mirandashell (Jan 10, 2017)

Gem1307 said:


> I feel like I do loads with him though, we do training a few times a day and we started puppy training last week and the trainer said we were doing a cab job with him and she can tell we spend the time with him. I get him out a couple of times a day, we play scent games, play with his toys. So if he's bored then I don't know how I can do much more with him, feel like I'm doing the best I can in that sense.


And yes, you are doing the best you can. This is not about you, it's about him being a puppy. They are needle-toothed aggravating non-stop little monsters. And that's why they are cute cos otherwise no-one would have one.

But the effort you are putting in now will result a lovely dog for years to come. This stage doesn't last for ever, I promise. It just feels like at the time. So don't feel bad for not liking the puppy at the moment. That's perfectly natural.


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## Gem1307 (Jan 13, 2018)

TennoAkita said:


> My brother recently went through the same with his French bulldog pup. I went through similar years ago. Is this your first dog/pup?
> 
> I'd suggest a crate with a play pen attached to it so the pup has his own area where you can "put him away" for him to relax and chew on something.


Yes it's my first puppy. He has a crate in the kitchen and a baby gate at the door so that's his area, I do put him in there when he's really on one but I hate to leave him there to long when I'm in the house as I feel bad.


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## Mirandashell (Jan 10, 2017)

With two children and a puppy you need time to yourself. So don't worry too much about leaving him for long enough to have a sit-down and a cup of tea.


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## Jamesgoeswalkies (May 8, 2014)

Gem1307 said:


> He has a crate in the kitchen and a baby gate at the door so that's his area, I do put him in there when he's really on one but I hate to leave him there to long when I'm in the house as I feel bad.


Leaving him alone to play quietly on his own or take a nap *is part of his training. *If you don't you will create a very demanding little pup who won't learn to settle on his own when you are in the house.! So use his play pen ...not when he is 'on one' but after a nice walk or play session when he can be ready to settle and give him something nice to do. And leave him.

J


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## TennoAkita (Jul 28, 2012)

Gem1307 said:


> Yes it's my first puppy. He has a crate in the kitchen and a baby gate at the door so that's his area, I do put him in there when he's really on one but I hate to leave him there to long when I'm in the house as I feel bad.


Don't feel bad, as someone wrote above, it is part of his training.

You'll create problems later if he doesn't learn to chill out alone for a bit. I know of another dog that is very attached to his owners and they have problems leaving him alone.


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Mirandashell said:


> With two children and a puppy you need time to yourself. So don't worry too much about leaving him for long enough to have a sit-down and a cup of tea.


Which makes me wonder time and time again why mum's just don't say no to getting a puppy until at least the kids are older- why make life more complicated and hard work?

Plus they are such a tie with holidays, days out etc.

Getting Jack (albeit not a pup) was a piece of cake when DS was 15 and I was practically retired! 

Even now I couldn't cope with a puppy!


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

I didn't get a puppy again until my two were at school and out of the way most of the day giving me time to deal with a pup. As it happens circumstances dictated this, but nevertheless I know my limits and it didn't include having babies/young children and puppies at the same. Others can and do cope well, but I know I was unlikely to, so I'm sure had our circumstances been different I still wouldn't have got a pup until the kids were at school. Handily the school they went to was just across the road from the house so I was able to take the pup over for a bit of socialisation now and again.


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## Guest (Jan 22, 2018)

From what I've read on here, I'm glad Clo was 5 months when we got her, because although we had/have issues, puppyhood sounds absolutely awful!


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

To be fair, it's a bit like having a baby, really traumatic at the time and you swear you will never let another man near you ever again. A year later number twos on the way.
You do forget how awful puppies can be (not all are by the way) especially if you haven't had a puppy in the house for 15 years like with me


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## Sairy (Nov 22, 2016)

Puppies, quite frankly, are a pain in the backside! They really know how to press the right buttons to wind you up the wrong way! Don't fret though, it does pass and you'll be left with a wonderful companion. 

For now, teach the pup some independence and how to settle - have a walk and a little play, pop him in his safe area with a Kong, stay with him in the room but don't interact with him and when he settles down leave the room and put your feet up for a bit. If you're lucky he might fall asleep and then you can put Corrie on and have a cuppa


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## Lauren5159 (May 28, 2013)

Ahh, puppies... 

Seriously, I hate puppies! :Hilarious
Love dogs but puppies are bloody exhausting! 

I agree with everyone else, you need to teach puppy to settle more on his own. I regularly put my 13 week old Cocker Spaniel in her crate to chill whilst I do things around the house. She settled really well after a minute or so and earlier, she slept in there for two hours whilst I watched TV. Honestly, it’s a god send. 

It does get better. But Springer Spaniels aren’t the calmest of breeds so how your puppy is acting is perfectly normal for his breed. Is he a working bred Springer? 

Why don’t you try some foundation gundog stuff with him? Something that will help you build a stronger bond alongside teaching him to settle. 

A lot of people always believe that puppies should be rewarded for doing something physical but it’s just as important to reward your pup for doing nothing. Settling is good. And don’t always feel like you need to physically tire your puppy out -all you’re doing then is conditioning an athlete. 

Keep your chin up! My Working Cocker is 13 weeks, I have no kids and I’m finding it exhausting so honestly, you’re a saint for dealing with your children and a high energy puppy!


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## JRB123 (Jun 22, 2017)

Lots of good advice there! Not sure if I can add anything. But I will say I’m a year on from you and it really does get better. Honestly. 
There were times when I wanted to walk out too as everything was being left to me and it was too much. 
Just hang on in there. Keep up with the training. It will pay off and soon you will find a routine and have a very loving fun companion.
I’m in the midst of raising teenagers now with their moods, and not particularly wanting to do stuff with their parents, stressed out husband etc and honestly our little dog is the light of my day sometimes! 
When I was in your stage - I met another dog walker I the park who said to me ‘ your dog will bring you years of joy’ and I seriously thought WTH - doesn’t he know how hard it is! I just smiled and nodded though!! But a year later I really know what he means! 
I know being a Mum and a dog owner it’s so important to find that time to yourself to rest and recharge. Perhaps if the family can’t help the pup maybe itcould go to a dog day care. If you’re worried about a big day care there’s also plenty of people who do puppy sitting in their own home too or will take the pup for a walk for you one on one. There’s various apps where you can book people to help. 
Good luck and Hang on in there x


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