# unusual trick to solve separation anxiety



## lucysnewmum (Feb 25, 2010)

hi there
have been flicking through the forums and noticed that most of the training advice is well documented, well practised stuff. just thought i would pop in and mention my unusual way i cured Lucy of her separation anxiety.

when i first rescued her she had been tied to a fence for up to 14 hrs a day, had to fight a 3 legged jack russel for food, never had any toys, didnt know what a bone was for, thought she was in trouble if you touched her in any way, and was terrified of her lead and collar. 

After i got her home with me she was very nervous and unsure of her new surroundings. she didnt like being touched but got extremely anxious if she was left. no amount of radio on, dap diffuser, lavender airspray, nor even meds from the vet would calm her down. within three weeks of being with me she had completely wrecked my home and a new bed was needed. i had to find a way to help her and the cure came completely by accident one day when my then husband and i had to go out. we lived in a caravan so there was no room to crate her. he just happened to say to her, very calmly, as we were about to leave her " back in 5 minutes" and raised his hand as if stopping traffic. when we returned, no chewing and one content dog fast asleep on the bed! he said straight away "only 5 minutes" and gave her a treat. EUREKA!

since then i have used this method on several dogs with anxiety and it works a treat. to teach "5 minutes" start by saying the words and doing the hand action. leave the room and come straight back in then reward the dog with a treat or a game. repeat several times until you return to a dog sitting waiting for you. once you have achieved this gradually increase the length of time you can leave the room, shut the door, and return. if at any time you hear the dog cry, whine, or wimper return and reward. this does not reward the wimpering. it reinforces that you are coming back and your dog will soon learn that he will get a reward for being quite and calm when you do.

p.s. and i still tell her i am only going to be 5 minutes when i go out - just in case!


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## dodigna (Feb 19, 2009)

You know what it does sound controversial, but I used a very similar way with Ray, in truth he is not left all that much, but we have been able to leave him for 4 hours several times and he seems quite ok with it now... The ignoring him and going out without making a fuss was really not working, he comes to work with me and we are alone in my office, I have to pop in other offices frequently and I was leaving a dog jumping, screaming and generally very distressed. So I started asking him to go back to his bed and to stay there using the hand gesture, if he was to start going mad I would go back in and without being annoyed repeat the whole thing, on 3rd attempt or so he would stay calm, I was never leaving for too long, few minutes at first so he learnt it wasn't the end of the world, once back in I always went to reward him.

When we left him home we were doing the same, well I was, my OH would just leave and without following a set routine the dog would bark his head off!!!
I would make sure he was walked first, even for 15 minutes only, then ask him to go to his bed (our sofa!), give him a kong, tell him back soon and leave, then wait outside as soon as he started barking I would go back in and repeat, now I still make sure he is walked, konged, but he seems pretty happy licking his peanut butter to worry about me leaving and generally find him asleep on return. Some times it was enough to go back to the door and ask him to go back to his bed and he would stop.

It meant you had to get started up to 40 minutes earlier then the time you wanted to go out, but it did seem to work.

I have also realized that although when we first brought him home there was for sure a degree of SA involved in most of cases of him getting distressed at being left was because of him missing out on going out, so not anxious of being alone, but being left behind as he was used to good things every time we left the house or the office, hence making sure he had had a bit of fun first, like a walk really helped.

Another little trick we used when we first got him was to pretend not to know he would go on the sofa if left alone in a room, Ray was really clingy the first month or so and wouldn't even let us go to bed or have a shower. We didn't allow him on the sofa, but by accident we realized that he started getting a little less clingy at night and we caught him on the sofa, the minute he was caught he would slide off and return to his bed; in truth we wanted to let him on the sofa with us, so we kept the pretense for a bit; he had too big an advantage being left as he could be naughty; it worked a dream, he soon couldn't wait for us to leave the room so he could jump on the sofa! He thought he was being clever, in truth we kind of manipulated him a little. When we leave him now he often goes on the bed, he thinks we don't know and we leave it at that and pretend not to notice a messy bed when we get back :lol:

In truth I had to think alternative, because we live in a flat and having to go through the process of rewarding calm after a barking session was really a bit unfair to the neighbours and wasn't working for us.


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## beccanockels (Apr 15, 2010)

I'm going to try this with my puppy, i carnt leave him for 5mins (even to go to the toilet) he cry's, yelps and barks loud untill i come back..So thank's for this idea, i'll get back to you soon to see if worked for my baby


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## cardaph (Aug 12, 2009)

Hmm that's interesting, nothing seems to be working for us with our dog's separation anxiety so will have to give this a try.


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## leashedForLife (Nov 1, 2009)

Yup! :thumbsup: 
thats why we have trouble falling-asleep in a strange bed - hotel, etc: 
our familiar routines are deranged  we do not have all the precursors for sleep...

see this post - 
Pet Forums Community - View Single Post - Calming Your Cerrrrrraaaaaazzzzzzzy Canine - new blog series 
and the one after it, also :thumbup: excellent tips on both prevention + reducing.

and CALMATIVES can be a huge, huge help - 
see post #22 of the Dog-Body-language sticky for a list of calming aids, all OTC, for humans + dogs. 

cheers, 
--- terry


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## Lisaandarchie (Apr 24, 2010)

Hi 

I have red you post with interest and am keen to know if lucy is still behaving this way when you go out. 

Archie, Jack Russell X, on quite a few occasions will chew my front door which is wrecked ! He doesn't do it in the morning when i go to work or when I go out at night when i am on my own, but if i go out with my son he thinks he is missing out and has a go at the door when we go which has now become unbearable, to a point it is taking over my life and I am now considering rehoming him as I get so uptight when I have to go out and dread coming back, and I leave in a ground floor flat so need to be mindful of my neighbours. 

I read a reply to your post and another doggy owner said it wasnt anxiety separation for her dog but what he is missing out on that made him react, which I feel is the same for Archie. I am going to try your method and try and replicate what I do when I leave in the morning etc when he doesn't go mental at the door. 

I am really encouraged by your post and just interested if Lucy has had any relapses? 

Many thanks


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## lucysnewmum (Feb 25, 2010)

Lucy hasnt relapsed since. and my foster puppy is picking up on the "i'll be 5 minutes" cue and settling straight away in her crate. i am greeting by four loving brown eyes and two waggy tails now! :thumbup:


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## Acacia86 (Dec 30, 2008)

I use that too :thumbup: but i say ''back in min'' or even ''won't be long boy'' and he settles right away!

I do also do the ''normal'' methods too, like leaving a well stuffed Kong, and hiding treats around the house for him to find etc

I rescued mine in 2008 and i have never ever had a problem leaving him. But i like to add my ''back in a min'' etc just for his peace of mind!!


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## beccanockels (Apr 15, 2010)

I have been using this trick now i say 'i'll be 5mins' and when i come back he hasnt messed and he is lying in his bed  so thank's a lot for sharing this as it has really helped us.


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## Melissa85 (Apr 28, 2010)

beccanockels said:


> i carnt leave him for 5mins (even to go to the toilet) he cry's, yelps and barks loud untill i come back..


Haha oh I sooo know that feeling! When my Golden was a pup he would even squirm his way to sit in the shower with me, even though he knew I was just behind the curtain! He would sit and try and catch droplets of water while I told him how silly he was and tried to push him out... but nope, he would just cry and yelp if I closed the bathroom door. It was a rental property and he was destroying the doors, so in the end he just had to take a shower with me every time!  Luckily he's a little better now but I still have to leave the bathroom door open for him.

And thanks for this idea, I'm definitely trying it with my boys as they get upset when I leave even though they have each other for company! Only problem is I use the hand up signal (like the stopping traffic one) when I want them to wait, so will have to come up with another signal to give!


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## lucysnewmum (Feb 25, 2010)

beccanockels said:


> I have been using this trick now i say 'i'll be 5mins' and when i come back he hasnt messed and he is lying in his bed  so thank's a lot for sharing this as it has really helped us.


:thumbup: way to go! glad it helped!


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## lucysnewmum (Feb 25, 2010)

Melissa85 said:


> Haha oh I sooo know that feeling! When my Golden was a pup he would even squirm his way to sit in the shower with me, even though he knew I was just behind the curtain! He would sit and try and catch droplets of water while I told him how silly he was and tried to push him out... but nope, he would just cry and yelp if I closed the bathroom door. It was a rental property and he was destroying the doors, so in the end he just had to take a shower with me every time!  Luckily he's a little better now but I still have to leave the bathroom door open for him.
> 
> And thanks for this idea, I'm definitely trying it with my boys as they get upset when I leave even though they have each other for company! Only problem is I use the hand up signal (like the stopping traffic one) when I want them to wait, so will have to come up with another signal to give!


the hand signal is different to the stop or wait one....
outstretch your hand so that all your fingers and your thumb are separated as if you are playing the piano or measuring your handspan! the wait signal should be done with the fingers firmly together. he will soon learn the difference!


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