# What to do if your cat has just lost his sister?



## lancashirelass (Oct 29, 2009)

Dear Forum,

Today we lost our beautiful cat Artemis. She was run over, a long, long way from home (we don't live near any main roads). She died instantly and a local woman took her straight to the vets. She was always the most adventurous. Her brother, Mackintosh, is much more of a home bird.

I'm massively concerned for Mackintosh and whether I should be doing anything to make things ok for him. The vet said that cats don't grieve like we do. But he will notice tonight that she isn't here. I'm giving him as much love and attention as I possible can. Do any of you have any experience of this. Is there anything I can do to make things better?

Any help much appreicated.

Michelle


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## Paddypaws (May 4, 2010)

Oh Michelle, I am so sorry, what sad news.
I am afraid I cant offer any experience based advice, it sounds as if you are doing all you can.


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## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. It sounds like you're doing the right thing giving your boy lots of fuss and attention.


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## lancashirelass (Oct 29, 2009)

Thank you for your kind words. I just thought that I'd make a memorial book with pictures of Artemis and stories from family and friends. We're devastated. True to her name, she loved to hunt and was strong and brave. But loved a cuddle too. She'll be very much missed.


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## lymorelynn (Oct 4, 2008)

So sorry for the loss of your cat  Just keep giving your boy lots of fuss and attention as you are doing already. A book of Artemis' life sounds a lovely thing to do for your family. I have pictures of previous cats around the house. I'm sure Mackintosh will miss his sister even cats don't grieve the way we do. When we lost a Siamese a few years ago our black cat (in my sig) spent a lot of time sleeping on her grave. I don't believe that it was a coincidence.


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## Merenwenrago (Sep 5, 2010)

Cats definitely grieve. 

When my Ginger cat lost his cat friend Claire he slept on her favourite chair outside for weeks only coming in for food until we got a new kitten to fill his gap . 

Now Ginger is running around happy and sleeps inside (also climbing trees). So maybe try get a kitten if he needs one.


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## Shimacat (Feb 14, 2010)

Yes, cats can and do grieve for a lost companion, although it depends how close they were. Ours, Ash, lost his brother Desh to a car. They were close and Ash yowled piteously for weeks. I'm so sorry for how you must be feeling - it's devastating.

The dilemma is whether to replace the missing cat immediately; the advice is usually not to, but to let the grieving cat settle down. Sometimes the remaining cat can come into their own as an only; others need companions. We found the Messybeast site enormously helpful; this piece on cat grief is excellent: When Cats Grieve

I hope it helps you as well.


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## mand82 (Sep 18, 2010)

sorry to hear you lost your cat,
cats grieve differently depends how close they were,
my two cats where close, but when my cat got run down, and i had to agree to put him to sleep my other cat didnt show any signs of grieving or noticing that the other wasnt there, some cats will notice theres something different and grieve soe will just carry on as normal, best thing to do is give the cat as much attention and fuss as you can and tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you, as i know they understand


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## jilly80 (Nov 28, 2009)

sorry to hear of your loss, i believe cats grieve if theres 2 or 3 in the household. when i had just two cats one of them went missing for about 2 weeks, although she was nuetered she had ventured and become lost and i finally got her back due to all the advertising i did. while she was away her sister who didnt normally use her voice, kept sitting at the window and miowing loud. having said that i now have 8 cats after my little 'daikiri' was run over 5 months ago and the others didnt seem to notice she had gone x


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## jill3 (Feb 18, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. The same thing happened to me 2 weeks ago.
I was on holiday and my neighbour accidentally ran Boris over. That left is soul mate on her own for 5 days.They were both 16 years old. They did everything together. My friend who was feeding them at the time came in more to see her.
We also have a young 2yrs 6 mths cat who went to a cattery while we were away 'cause he went missing for 6 weeks earlier in the year and thought it would be better for him.

Last week we decided to get a kitten to bring a little happiness into the home and company for the other two cats.
I am so glad we have she has made us smile again.

Our old cat Yazmin is fine with the kitten and Harley our young boy Loves her. He plays with her and watches her all the time.

So maybe a kitten companion for Mackingtosh.
I think Kittens are easier to introduce then adult cats.
I have done this a 3 times without any problems.


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## lancashirelass (Oct 29, 2009)

Shimacat said:


> Yes, cats can and do grieve for a lost companion, although it depends how close they were. Ours, Ash, lost his brother Desh to a car. They were close and Ash yowled piteously for weeks. I'm so sorry for how you must be feeling - it's devastating.
> 
> The dilemma is whether to replace the missing cat immediately; the advice is usually not to, but to let the grieving cat settle down. Sometimes the remaining cat can come into their own as an only; others need companions. We found the Messybeast site enormously helpful; this piece on cat grief is excellent: When Cats Grieve
> 
> I hope it helps you as well.


Thank you all for your lovely messages and support. The link to this article (above) from Shimacat has been great! Thank you. We've plugged in a Feliway diffuser and are showering Mackintosh with love and attention. He's still crying and wandering around the house looking for her. But as some of you have said, we hope he'll settle down very soon. And my partner and I are slowly coming to terms with Artemis' loss.

I love this Forum. Whether its been 'what to do with the christmas tree?' or ' how to introduce your kittens to the outside world?', it has always had wonderful, supportive information. Thank goodness for you guys!


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