# Introducing resident 12 week femail to 8 week male



## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Hi,

We have had a female kitten for around 4-5 weeks now. She is about 12 weeks old.

We have just bought an apparently 8 week old male, but he does seem very small.

I have read lots of things about slow introductions etc, but we kind of flew in as initial meeting seemed ok. He is currently isolated in his own room.

The female hissed a few times on initial introductions when he was in a carrier. Later one we put them together, i was holding her initially.

It seemed ok, she was sniffing/licking his bottom. She did lick him elsewhere a few times, but also bit his bottom/back. She also lunged at him a few times, she was trying to bite his neck. I feel a bit like she was viewing him as prey, but not sure i am over paranoid. There were no vicous attacks or crying but I felt there might have been intent. I took a little video of part of the introductions, and would appreciate peoples views.

My Movie small - YouTube

Should be uploaded soon

We do intend to keep them apart for a week or so, swapping smells etc, but would like someone to ease my concerns please!

Thanks


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## nightkitten (Jun 15, 2012)

Congratulations to your new kitten!

But: IMO 8 weeks is too young to take a kitten away from its mother. It should be more like 12 weeks.

And I too think that this kitten looks too small for 8 weeks. To me it looks more like 6 weeks?

Having watched the video it does not look like aggressive behaviour. In a normal situation I would put them together supervised and would see no reason to keep them apart for 1 week. Kittens normally get on with each other very easily.

But: The kitten seems so tiny for 8 weeks and it may get too much for her?

I bet someone with more experience will be along soon and give better advice.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

Oh dear - that kitten is about 5-6 weeks old - it's eyes are still blue - poor wee thing. It really should be with it's mother still

Luckily your other cat is not being aggressive. 

I hope all goes well but you could end up with problems socially etc.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Oh dear indeed.
Most people seem to sell "moggies" when they are 8 weeks.
We were told it was 8 weeks, only small due to the owner having 2 litters of 5 each. This is why we were told it was small, competing for food etc.

Don't you think the older kitten is being agressive, even though it's biting it's neck?

What signs should I look out for? It's part of the reason I don't want to mix them, as it's so small.

He seems to be litter trained, using his tray for wee's but hasn't had a poo after 24 hours now. Going to keep an eye on it.

We have been feeding him Royal Canin kitten (as advised by the vet for our older kitten) and he seems to be enjoying it.

Anyway I can get a certain estimate on his age? If he is 5-6 weeks should we be feeding him anything different? Or should we get him to the vets?
Anything else we should think about doing?

Thanks again for the help.


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## nightkitten (Jun 15, 2012)

That biting is playful biting.

Here is a link to a thread that explains aggressive cat behaviour. Maybe read through it so you know when your kitten is showing aggressive behaviour or not.
http://www.petforums.co.uk/cat-training-behaviour/115412-types-cat-aggression-signs-how-combat.html

Can't you ask the breeder you got the kitten from to keep it with it's mother for at least another 3 weeks?

I can't advise on feeding as I have never had a kitten that young.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

What does he weigh? - that will help age him more, but the blue eyes are a give away - they start changing at 6 weeks - my 6 week olds are between 720 and 850g, from a litter of 5!

Feeding him should be fine - mine all eat well, and they all use the litter tray well - what he will miss out on is social skills that mum would now be teaching him.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again.

I suggest that conversation with the breeder would be a no.
She was selling 10, so I am sure she is fully aware of the situation, and she has bred before.

How can I be more certain about his age?
Is his eyes being blue a definitive sign?
Could he be so small as he was with 9 other kittens?

Thanks.

EDIT : Just noticed previous post, and blue eye thing


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

Yes his eyes being blue is a definite sign, weigh him. I bet he's around 600g.

He could be small if she wasn't feeding them or the mum enough - but he is just a young kitten


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

spid said:


> What does he weigh? - that will help age him more, but the blue eyes are a give away - they start changing at 6 weeks - my 6 week olds are between 720 and 850g, from a litter of 5!
> 
> Feeding him should be fine - mine all eat well, and they all use the litter tray well - what he will miss out on is social skills that mum would now be teaching him.


I haven't weighed him, will try tonight.
The older cat was 830g at eight weeks. She has piled the weight on since we got her.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

I was just reading some cats (even tabbies) the eyes could remain blue and if they are going to change, it may not be till 12 weeks?

Breeds of Cats With Blue Eyes


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

He isn't a breed of cat with blue eyes though - he will very probably have green eyes or golden, but not blue. It's the type of blue too - that murky blue means they will change. ANd look at his size etc. He is exactly like my 6 week olds. Honestly he's not 8 weeks old.

That link also says they will be settled at 12 weeks , not that they begin to change at 12 weeks - cats eyes begin to change at 6 weeks - my kittens at 6 weeks have already begun to change - the two that will have blue eyes (tabbies yes, but pointed) have a different type of blue from quite early on.


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

spid said:


> > ANd look at his size etc. He is exactly like my 6 week olds. Honestly he's not 8 weeks old.
> 
> 
> I agree. As soon as I watched the video I thought "that little kitty is never
> ...


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks guys.

I tried introducing them again tonight 

The older cat was agressive again. Been reading up on cat body language her ears forward, her tail swishing. She seems like she is toying with him, jabbing him, then lunging in. Like toying with her prey. the poor litte fella was trying to stand his ground, but he seemed submissive. 

He walked away a few times as they were facing off, and she was attacking him from behind. She never did pin him down or anything.

I ended up squirting her with water as she chased him into a hard to reach area.

She is not going to hurt him bad, or worse is she?
Are we being too much of a wuss? Should we really just stand back and let her beat him up?

Is it worth buying that Feliway stuff?
I think he is outgrowing the room already, charging round and going mental.


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Normuk said:


> > She is not going to hurt him bad, or worse is she?
> > Are we being too much of a wuss? Should we really just stand back and let her beat him up?
> 
> 
> ...


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

you don't need to beg!
It's twice we put a stop to it, I am kind of happy we are not being too soft.
I have read around on here, and people say if there is no screaming or blood, then let them get on with it. That's why I was questioning him being a wuss.

I do understand the size difference is too big. At what point do we (if ever) just let them get on with it?

The little fella doesn' actually seem that scared, but she is just too strong and agressive.

I feel like we are a bit stuck going forward 
the funny thing is he is asleep upstairs and she is sleeping on my wifes lap like nothing happened.
I think I am more stressed than both of them put together.


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## egyptianreggae (May 26, 2012)

Going by the video, she seems more interested and concerned with sussing him out than aggressive, but he is very tiny and probably best to supervise them till he gets bigger and develops a bit more attitude. He's so little and vulnerable, I'm not surprised you're worried, I was feeling all maternal and protective just watching him! I love watching cat communication, you can really get a sense of the two of them talking to each other. Has there been any growling or hissing? When I introduced an 8 week old kitten to my two adult male cats, the dominant male hissed and spat repeatedly, and the other one hissed a bit then ran away. There's nothing funnier than a big butch 5.7kg Tom cat running away from a tiny eight-week old kitten...


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

There was some initial hissing my the older female when we first introduced them (little fella in a carrier) at the weekend.

There hasn't been any , maybe the younger one a little.

It's Dexter's swishing tail and ears back (not fully) that makes me think she is being a bit too agressive. Maybe I shouldn't have named here after the american TV serial killer.

We ordered some Feliway last night, so I might leave off further introductions until the weekend (when it arrives). I know it might take a bit of time to get the effects.

My better half wants to keep trying to introduce them nightly until then? I am not so sure. Any advice on that?

Ideally the little fella would be a bit bigger then I wouldn't be so worried.

This is a bigger pain than I thought it was ever going to be!


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Dexter has started spending more time outside of his room.
She is meowing at the door.

Can anything be read into that, positive, or negative?

Thanks


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Normuk said:


> Dexter has started spending more time outside of his room.
> She is meowing at the door.
> 
> Can anything be read into that, positive, or negative?
> ...


Well, it could be interpreted as plain old curiosity. On the other hand it could be interpreted as Dexter is getting a bit wound up and wanting to get at the little fella to beat him up. Without seeing her body language it is hard to say -- could you post another of your helpful little videos perhaps?

I think your little guy is still of an age where he is very trusting and he does not expect to be attacked by another cat. He thinks Dexter is just playing with him, as he himself played and rough-housed with his litter mates. Or possibly that Dexter is like his mum, and is there to protect him.

It is very important the relationship between these two gets off to a good start, as it will set the tone for the rest of their lives together. If the little fella loses his trust and feels threatened by Dexter it could make him turn aggressive himself as he matures. And if Dexter is allowed to be a bully, she may remain a bully all her life. I have seen it happen

I would give it at least another month before allowing them to interact at all freely. By the time the little guy is about 10 to 12 weeks old he will be stronger and better able to stand up for himself with Dexter. I expect he will have grown quite a bit by then.

Eventually of course they will have to square up to each other and sort out their territories. But not yet.

As for whether to allow them contact every evening at the moment, I don't see a problem as long as they are supervised by you or your OH. But the moment you feel Dexter is getting agitated or aggressive to the little one, or flattening her ears and swishing her tail, I would take the little guy away to his safe room. There is nothing to be gained from allowing Dexter's mood to remain angry or upset, as Dexter will gradually come to associate her negative feelings with the little guy's presence, and her behaviour will become a reflex response..(e.g. Pavlov's dogs).

What would be good is if you can occupy or distract Dexter with games whilst the little fella is in the room, so that not all Dexter's attention is focused on him. Also, feed them treats only when they are together, not at any other times, and give them both catnip toys when they are together, or feed them a special treat such as some pot-roasted or boiled chicken, so they will come to associate nice things with being in the room together.

It can take quite a while to introduce a new kitten....patience is the byword here! Good luck!


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks for that it's really useful.

I did try some treats last night, but Dexter wasn't interested , she was more interested in getting in his face. She did go for the treat stick after a bit, but she wolfed it down so she could get back to him  It seems like she only has eyes for him when he is around.

I might actually go and pick up some Feliway tonight, to get that started. Even with the short supervised introductions, I feel like it gets out of hand a bit too quickly. But that could just me being over protective. 

If we do more introductions, I will take another video. It's useful to get better experienced peoples view of the body language either to agree or disagree with what I think.

He's a typical boy (we call him Blu) rushing around, not scared of anything, a very different character to Dexter. I am sure one day he will be the dominant one.

thanks again for all your help, it's appreciated.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Tried again with the introductions tonight.
We bought some Feliway tonight and plugged it in.
It was only on for an hour or so before we tried the introduction,so not putting anything down to that.

Followed the tips again for some treats, had them prepared this time before we brought Blu in. They ate about 1 foot away from each other, Dexter didn't notice him for a good a minute or so, but carried on eating anyway, which i guess it's a slight improvement.

But, 3 minutes in, before either of them had finished Blu decided to go towards Dexter. After a bit of seemingly harmless playing, Dexters tail started swishing so she got a squirt of water and then I took Dexter away to his room for some time to smell around.

I would be interested in other peoples views on the video. Especially if I jumped in too quick.

Kitten to Kitten 3rd Introduction - YouTube

Another video if anyone is interested of Sleepy Blu nearly falling off the bed

Sleepy Kitten - YouTube

Thanks in advance


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## nightkitten (Jun 15, 2012)

To me that did not look like proper aggression at all. More like maybe a little too rough playing for the little Blu.

I would not squirt her with water at all as otherwise Dexter could combine the awful water squirting with Blu's presence. If you think it is getting aggressive just pick Dexter up and take her away. Don't even tell her off but just remove her.

I think you are doing a good job with the introduction


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

I agree with nightkitten, it did not look at all like aggression to me! 
In fact I thought Dexter was being really sweet with Blu.  

Dexter's tail was up (friendly, enquiring, playful) and she was moving it slowly, in a good way. Her ears were forward. She was being quite gentle with Blu I thought, and I don't feel you needed to intervene at that point. But I understand you are concerned about Blu's safety, and that is paramount for sure.. It is a matter of reading the cats' body language and you will get more knowledgeable about this every day. 

I also agree with NK, you should not spray Dexter with water -- it was not necessary at that point in the interaction and should never be necessary 
unless the cats were ever to be in the middle of a really violent fight. Which is unlikely to happen as you are supervising them. 

It looks like you have made some good progress, getting them to eat some tasty food near each other - well done! Keep up the good work:thumbup:


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again guys.

It was her tail swishing towards the end that sent me over the edge .
Was that not agression?
I will ease up on the water, I think I am just being overprotective.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

Tail swishing in itself isn't aggression - it might be a sign that she is a bit tense but that is all - biting to draw blood is aggression. Even batting him on the head claws retracted isn't aggression - she is just marking out her rules, making sure he knows she is boss, warning him really - expect hissing and spitting and a bit of whacking and pouncing. Some squealing on him part to. The trouble is if you keep taking her away too early and making her associate him with nasty spraying water a) it's going to take forever to introduce them and b) they will never be friends. 

Yes, he is very young so you need to be extra vigilant. But let them work it out also.

Feliway can take up to a week to get working. Have you tried scent swapping?

Going to TRY to watch the video now - v slow internet here. and will update.

EDIT: I saw no aggression there at all - in fact you sprayed her just as she was playing! Cats swish their tails for all sorts of reasons and when aggressive they puff them up to be as big as possible. Not aggressive behaviour. 

By the way - have you weighed him yet - it's important for vaccinations - give them to early and they aren't affective! If he's 2 weeks younger than you think you will be giving him his 9 week jabs at 7 weeks and they may not work and then you will have a cat that is open to catching horrid diseases.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks Spid.

Just to go back to an earlier post of yours, I think is eyes are slowly turning green, so it verifies what you were saying.

I am just finding it hard to know when to draw the line. Obviously I don't want the reverse effect of her hurting him too much, and him being forever scared of her.

I tried scent swapping some toys the other day. I let her have a good sniff in his room , and I let him have some time in the living room last night. I could probably do more though.

I will definately hold back on the water, unless there are major issues.

We were just talking about weighing him last night, but we never got around to it. I did step on some scales with him, and without him. That said he was around 800g, but I am not reading too much into that. I need to put him on the food scales. Dexter was about 830g when we got her, she is so much heavier now.

Regarding vaccinations, lets assume he was 5 weeks when we got him. I guess we should wait 6 weeks to make sure?


Me being anal, and new to cats, with him being so small, I guess I need some "if she does this" then split them. I am not sure what that is? Maybe there are no hard and fast rules? I am just a big softie I think. Or is it puffy tails for a while?

Thanks again for everyones helps, it's very much appreciated. I am starting to feel more and more positive.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

First jabs are at 9 weeks - so assume 5 weeks when you got him and then add on 4 weeks. 

Basically once you've heard a real cat fight or a kitten really scream in pain you know the difference between that and when they squeal. SHe needs to tussle with him and he needs to squeal at her so she knows when she is being a bit rough. That's the way they communicate. If he is frightened he will run away and cower in a corner. If he comes back for more he is fine. He will kick her with his back legs (like a bunny hopping) that's playing - I would be a little wary of her doing this to him purely on the size difference - but in two weeks he will be lots bigger. They will grab each other and look like they are biting but there will be no blood and not serous caterwauling (there will be squealing and that's normal). If you want to intervene try doing it by getting out a wand type toy and distracting them. If you feel the need to take one away - lift them out and move them away for 5 mins - don't tell off, don't spray with water, just distract. At this age don't leave him alone with her just because he is too small.


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

spid said:


> s.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Just a quick update.
I think we are getting a bit tougher now.

We tried again last night, gave them both treats.
Silly Blu was determined to eat Dexters treats, which resulted in him getting a few hisses from her. Bless him, I think he has no idea of the "rules".

Dexter mainly finished her treats, Blu didn't get the chance to have much.
Dexter was wrestling him a bit, we got a laster pen and "Da Bird" out to distract. Dexter didn't like Blu playing with the Da Bird so he got some more hisses, equally when he went near her scratching pole.


All in all we left them together for 15 minutes (eating, distracted with play, a bit of play fighint) which is a record. So I guess that's progress. Also I feel it's actually progress that she hissed at him a few times. I still don't think he is necessarily taking these warnings on board, but I guess that's the point of what's going on?

We eventually took them into seperate rooms when Blu started looking a bit afraid. I was conscious to be relaxed with them both at this point, and not make a big deal of it. I think it's going to be a long road and I feel like the there needs to be a lot more posturing to happen before they may relax a bit more. But that's not going to happen until he's a big bigger and stronger.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

The thing is he doesn't know the signals because he is so young - this is what mum would have taught him in the next few weeks. So it is going to be a long road as he learns. You should her my mums tell their kittens off when they do something wrong! And they are quite rough with them when they want to clean them and they won't stop wriggling! First litter I had I was a bit worried and then I realised what was going on. 

Your girl is going to have to step up and assume the role of his mum and teach him manners - at this age he won't be able to play for long before he needs a long sleep and that's a good time for them to be together.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again Spid, all very useful information.
I will update as and when.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

I think it's the 5th time last night for introductions.
Not really sure what to think of it.
Armed with all the information you guys have given me we tried again.


Usual start with treats. An usually Blu going over to Dexter this time. There were no hisses from Dexter at this point. At one point Dexter took some of her food away, into a corbet from Blu, so he couldn't have it.

We tried distractions again too, at certain points during the introduction.
At one point Blu escaped under a sofa, where Dexter can't fit anymore.
It went one for about 5 minutes her trying to jab him from the edges, and him manoevuring underneat and jabbing her back. Everytime Dexter trotted off he immediately got out, which makes me think he wasn't that scared, at that point.

Blu was jabbing her back tonight, where normally he just cowers. I think at one point she was jabbing him (I think without any claws) and he gave her one back with a fist full of claws, and she didn't like that. He seems to nearly always have his claws out.

Towards the end Dexter was getting wound up, and they ended up wrestling on the floor with her Bunny kicking him, he squealed a couple of times at this point, so that was it for that night. I don't think it was the squealing itself that made me think it was too much, but an earlier thread saying that it might be too much for him at his size.

I think they were together for about a total of 20 minutes.

If Blu was bigger and tougher, and there wasn't any bad violence, how long could this wrestling/posturing go on for, hours? What's actually the point of it? Is it just one of them trying to be the dominant one?

It's pretty awful watching them in this way


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

It actually sounds all fairly normal - he can't retract his claws fully at the moment - he's too young - I would just leave them to it for a good hour or so. Squealing is fine - it's his way of communicating. The fact that he is under the sofa but still playing with her is great; and most of what you describe *is* play!

This wrestling can go on four hours and hours and it's fine - it's playing! In the wild it is how they would learn how to gain the skills for hunting.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again Spid.

Your man'ing me up, slowly 

So, just to confirm if he squeals let them go? and only split them maybe after an hour, or if he is really looking scared?
Is this wrestling normality, or is it just as he is new? Is this how it's going to be forever?

Thanks again.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

Not forever - but yes for a good while - but not all the time - my 5 year old still occasionally have a scatty half hour and wrestle. My 18 month old and the 8 months old wrestle on a daily basis - the kitten wrestle every 1/2 hour! ANd the squeals you hear from them would put a witch to shame! But that's how they learn. They will slow down as they age. But it is normal for them to play wrestle every day until they are about two - normally it will only br for 1/2 an hour or a bit more and then they get exhausted and sleep. 

If he is scared he won't go back for more and will run away with all his fur on end and desperately try to get into a corner or under somewhere where she can't get to him and spit at her - he isn't scared when he's batting her back.

If he squeals leave them to it - if he screams (really screams - intervene)


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

There was me thinking I was man'ing up 

Didn't last long at all face to face tonight, I think Dexter is just being to big and strong for him. She pretty much immediately pins him down and gets him squealing, and kicking him quite hard. Although he is starting to fight back, it just makes her come back twice as hard.

They were together for about 5 minutes, and took a short video of their last wrestle. Although it's dark , hopefully you guys can get a good idea why i feel for Blu. The only hiss was from dexter when i put my hand too near her treats. There may have been a bit of growling during their wrestles, and I am not sure who from.

Here is the video

Kitten and Kitten intro3 - YouTube

After we split them , we let them play under the door, there is a reasonable gap as we have a wooden floor. They were jabbing for about 10-15 minutes under the door. Initially though Blu had his heckles up when he saw her legs under the door.

I am really starting to think , that even though there might be anything untoward going on, I really think that it might be too much for Blu at his size. As much as it's a pain and hassle keeping Blu upstairs, I think it's going to be a good few weeks before I have much hope of integrating them 

Edit , sorry for the crap video


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Yes, I understand how you feel Norm! It does look and sound as though Blu is being a bit overwhelmed by Dexter at the present, though I don't think she is really hurting him, I mean not biting or drawing blood? 

But just the fact Dexter appears to be dominating him so much might be a tad frightening for Blu I would think..... alternatively it might make him feel he has to become aggressive too! He is a very good natured little chap isn't he though, what he puts up with? 

If you are more comfortable with the idea of waiting a couple of weeks until you try integrating them again, then I would do that if I were in your shoes.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

See what worries me is that you keep splitting them up when they are playing i.e. being good - that is a video of playing. You are setting them up to fail because when they are being normal and having fun you are telling Dexter off. So eventually she will associate Blu with being told off and will possibly attack him aggressively. 

I think you either need to let them get on with it - or keep them completely apart and start again in two weeks when Blu is older, but of course Dexter will be two weeks bigger too so you may end up with the same situation again.


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again guys.

After reading Spid's message , we decided to try again today.
They were together for nearly an hour, which is progress.
I think we are getting a better coping with it.

Blu spent some of the time under the sofa, pawing each other, and he seemed to be happy to come back out. i would have thought he would have cowered under there if he was scared?

Some points it was Dexter doing the chasing, and some points it was Blu coming looking for trouble. I still think Dexter is a bit rough for Blu, would be interested to see what you guys think.

All of the noise is coming from Blu. The growling and he also hissed on a number of occasions. It seems to me he is fighting? But maybe just in reaction to Dexters "no nonsense" approach.

Here is another video

Kitten to kitten introduction 4 - YouTube

Not sure why the sound keeps cutting out, but you should be able to hear Blus noise.He sometimes makes these noises when Dexter isn't doing anything.

It did seem a little less intense over the hour, previously it was pretty much full on "playing".

Sorry for being such a "cat beginner"


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

I just watched your video and one of my own cats, sleeping near me, woke up very alarmed by the sound of Blu squealing, and began looking all round the room for the *hidden* kitten!:lol::lol:

I agree with Spid -- it does look as though Dexter is just playing. As I have said previously I see no sign of aggression from Dexter. She just seems to be a lively and playful kittycat and thoroughly fascinated by Blu! 

My only concern is Dexter is a bit persistent when she chases after, and jumps on Blu, and that he *might* possibly experience it as bullying if it went on for too long. But as you are there to step in if necessary, and he could always run away and hide under the sofa if he wanted to, then I don't think it's a problem really. 

If it were me I would keep going as you are, rather than keeping them totally apart for a few weeks.  You might lose the benefit of the progress you have already made, if you keep them separate.


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

I agree with Chillminx - this is play. Yes, keep an eye on it, and distract if needed, but I wouldn't separate either. Those noises he makes are normal - you should hear my kittens squeal at tines - they are WAY noisier! Keep up the good work.

I loved the way he was interested in a knot in the wood! So sweet.


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## nightkitten (Jun 15, 2012)

That video is so sweet 

You are doing very well with the introductions between the two of them. They seem to be having a lot of fun playing together.

And if you think that is rough...you should see my two kittens play!


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## jaycee05 (Sep 24, 2012)

I have been reading this thread with interest, and watching the videos, i dont think Dexter is being aggresive, she may be testing the kitten,to see how he reacts to her playing with him, 
Also just a thought, be sure to make a fuss of Dexter, so she knows you are not just being on the kittens side as it were, so there is no jealousy going on
I am sure it will all be ok in the end,


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Thanks again all, it really is appreciated.
I am reassured by your opinions that Dex doesn't seem to be too rough

Had them together again last night, which was ok I think. Then 40 minutes again earlier today. 

We stopped early today as they were wrestling on the sofa on fell off. Poor little Blu got the brunt of the fall, and he scampered as quick as he could. Poor little thing gave out a really loud squeal.

It was a bit intense again today. Dexter was backing off now and again, waiting 10-20 seconds then going back in.

It does seem at times, Blu just wants a look around, that seems to be Dexters opportunity to pounce on him. I would feel better if they have a bit of a bigger break, instead of pretty much being at it all the time.

There were signs yesterday of dexter lying on her back, and a bit more soft fighting, but in the majority Dexter is the dominant one.

Blu doesn't help himself, by swiping at her backside when she walks off!

I do believe though, as touched on by you guys in earlier posts, that Blu doesn't know the boundaries. I feel like he is being quite agressive, and I think that confuses Dexter and she ups the force a bit. I do feel like she wants him to show a few signs of surrender, but he won't. I do feel like he thinks he is a big tiger, and he is the boss.

I did weigh him today, only 570g, oh dear.

We have an issue with a cattery. We wanted to go away for the weekend towards the end of October and put them both in the cattery. But, due to the estimations on Blu's age, it's not going to be enough time for his injections


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## Normuk (Sep 23, 2012)

Just a quick update.

I think we are making progress. In the 2nd week of introductions we upped the time together to 2 hours per day. I think they just need as much time as possible to get used to each other. In the middle of last week(the 2nd time) Blu chased Dexter across the room for the first time, it was hilarious. That happens regularly now, one chasing one across the room one way, then the other across the room the other way.

Blu still has his safe room, but they were together for most of the weekend if we were in the house. It still gets a little rough for Blu IMO, but we don't spli them at all. I think Blu brings it on himself in some ways, he is a tenacious little boy, who will just keep going back for more. He managed to get on top of the big scratching post yesterday and stay on. Normally Dexter likes to lounge on it. Blu frantically climbs up one of the posts and Dexter normally bites his fingers to stop him getting all the way up. He made it yesterday and stayed on despite Dexter trying to throw him off. 

It was also nice to one of them drinking from one side of Dexters bowl, and the other eating from the other side. I think they miss each other when they are apart, but they would never admit that.

We weighed Blu yesterday and he is 700g (that's 130g heavier in a week, not too bad I guess).

Hopefully another week or so, then we can leave them together when we go out, or maybe even over night. Not looking forward to them racing around during the night though!


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

Glad to hear of the progress


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Thanks for updating us Norm. Very pleased to hear things are going so well with the little poppets!:thumbup: Keep up the good work!


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## nightkitten (Jun 15, 2012)

Normuk said:


> Hopefully another week or so, then we can leave them together when we go out, or maybe even over night. Not looking forward to them racing around during the night though!


Haha, you will have fun at night! :001_tt2: One suggestion from me: Buy earplugs


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