# Why did our Siamese cat attack our 20 month old daughter?



## Grae (Jan 2, 2015)

Hi, my name is Grae, and I could do with some advice.

We have a 6 and a half year old Siamese Silver Point Tabby neutered male, that we took in as a stray. He was hanging around near my mum's house; she tried in vain to befriend him, so I had a go and after 20 minutes of lying down at his level with some food, he eventually came to me. My mum took him in, fed him and took him to the vets to see if he was micro-chipped, which he wasn't. The vet reckoned he was about 18 months old; he'd been living rough for about 6 months; and he was mal-nourished, covered in ticks and very timid.
We tried to find his owners, using the internet, asking local vets, and a local radio announcement, but to no avail.

As my mum already had too many cats, we decided to give him a home. He's a real character and very loveable. However, he has an aggressive streak in him. He has viciously attacked my wife on several occasions, sinking his teeth deep into her arm and drawing blood. This is not playful behaviour; his pupils dilate and he launches himself at her. These are unprovoked attacks, and often when my wife is sitting in bed, therefore perhaps more vulnerable. She has learned to either put him out of the room or hide under the duvet when she sees his eyes get that feisty look. He has never attacked me.

The day after boxing day, we were in our living room chatting with a friend, when the cat attacked our daughter in front of us for no real reason. It was a vicious attack, biting and rabbit-kicking her leg. I shouted at him and chased him out of the house. Fortunately our daughter had socks, tights and denim dungarees on, so she wasn't actually hurt. I can only imagine how bad it would have been if she wasn't so well covered up.

I'm now very angry with him, and although I love him, I no longer trust him. As adults, we can deal with his aggression, but we always said that if he attacked our little girl, we would have to find him a new home. This is where we are at now.

Until this incident he has been incredibly tolerant with her. Usually when he plays with her he keeps his claws retracted, and when she handles him roughly he doesn't retaliate at all.

What makes this even harder, tonight when I was putting my little girl to bed, she said to me, "Mum-mum love Jo-jo, Bean-bean (this is what she calls herself) love Jo-jo, Dad-dad stroke Jo-jo, on cushion." She has obviously picked up on my anger towards him, and wants me to make up with him. Unfortunately I feel the bond between myself and Jo-jo is broken now, though this is not something I choose, it's just how I feel.

By the way, he damaged one of my hi-fi speakers last night - could this just be coincidence, or a sort of revenge? He is a very intelligent cat.

So, has anybody got any suggestions or good advice to offer?

Thanks in advance, Grae


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## Guest (Jan 2, 2015)

Grae said:


> Hi, my name is Grae, and I could do with some advice.
> 
> We have a 6 and a half year old Siamese Silver Point Tabby neutered male, that we took in as a stray. He was hanging around near my mum's house; she tried in vain to befriend him, so I had a go and after 20 minutes of lying down at his level with some food, he eventually came to me. My mum took him in, fed him and took him to the vets to see if he was micro-chipped, which he wasn't. The vet reckoned he was about 18 months old; he'd been living rough for about 6 months; and he was mal-nourished, covered in ticks and very timid.
> We tried to find his owners, using the internet, asking local vets, and a local radio announcement, but to no avail.
> ...


When was the last time he saw a vet? Whenever there is uncharacteristic aggression, I think vet check to make sure the cat isnt feeling unwell or hurt.

Secondly, the bolded jumps out at me. I would not let my child handle the cat roughly, and if your daughter cant contain herself, simply dont let her handle the cat at all.
Also make sure he has plenty of ways to escape and get away from your daughter if he doesnt wish to interact with her.

Outside of that, sorry, Im not much use.


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## jaycee05 (Sep 24, 2012)

I can only reiterate what the last poster suggested, having him checked out at the vets,6 isnt old for a cat ,but maybe hes getting a few twinges or not feeling too well, and also agree that your daughter shouldnt be allowed to rough handle him at all, unfortunately when cats attack children its often simply because of this, and the poor cat gets blamed for being nasty, or even got rid of, but checking his health is a start i think, and tell the vet how he behaves


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Hi Grae, welcome to Pet Forums

I do understand it must have been very upsetting to witness your cat suddenly attacking your daughter's leg, and as you say thank goodness she was well covered at the time so no harm was done.

I know this may be hard to accept but I do think when your cat behaved that way to your daughter it was a kind of rough play fighting. It did not come of the blue as it may have appeared to do. Your daughter has, as you say, been rough with him on more than one occasion, and perhaps hurt him unintentionally.

Cats are very logical creatures and great at making associations between one event and another. Your cat is intelligent and the message he has got from you and your wife is that it is acceptable for your daughter sometimes to play roughly with him. Logically your cat will thus feel it's OK for him to play roughly sometimes with your daughter.

It is essential to break this association of ideas by not allowing your daughter to play with the cat at all, except at a distance e.g. using a feather wand, or throwing balls for him to chase. Under no circumstances should a child of her age be allowed to pick the cat up, pull his tail, smack him or do anything similar, as children often will if allowed to.

In the case of this particular cat, whom you know has a bit of a volatile streak it is even more important that your daughter is taught not to invade the cat's personal space.

I think it would be a shame if you were to rehome your cat on the basis of this one episode, when your daughter was very fortunately not hurt. But I do understand you being angry thinking about what might have happened.

Your cat probably understood you were angry at the time, and possibly made the connection between you chasing him out of the house and his behaviour to your daughter. But cats live in the moment, by now he will have forgotten the incident and if you were to continue to be angry or distant with him he wouldn't be able to make any sense of, and would be anxious because you were behaving differently to him.

I must admit I cannot say why your cat should suddenly attack your wife when she is in bed. But because I really do believe cats always do things for a reason I find it hard to see it as purely random, and feel there must be a rational explanation. But without knowing all that had happened in the few hours leading up to the attack I could not give an explanation.


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## lymorelynn (Oct 4, 2008)

Grae, welcome to of first of all. 
Chilliminx has offered great advice as she usually does. Siamese are generally very intelligent and do pick up on all kinds of moods. The fact that JoJo had a difficult start in life will probably have left some impact on his behaviour. Attacking your wife while she is in bed may seem unreasonable but, in my own experience of Siamese, I would say that he is attention seeking or more accurately, demanding.
With your daughter, children should never be allowed to play roughly with any animal and especially not one that is known to have an aggressive streak. He will not understand that he shouldn't retaliate in kind even if nine times out of ten he will play gently.
Chasing JoJo out of the house will not have helped with any issues but he will not remember why you did so. He will only have learnt that you too can behave unpredictably. I doubt that damaginging your speakers was an ct of revenge.
Please think carefully before considering rehoming him. Your little girl has obviously forgiven him and he only wants your love and attention. Siamese can be a very jealous and demanding breed and I really do think that is the root cause of JoJo's current behaviour.
By the way, I am intrigued when you say he is a silver tabby point - silver in Siamese is not easily visible and not very common. It is found when there is silver oriental in a cat's ancestry and Siamese which possibly have silver in their genes are not on the full Siames registy. As yet there is no test for the silver gene. I am interested because two of my own breeding girls have silver in their pedigree but with no outward signs.


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## Grae (Jan 2, 2015)

Hi all, and thank you for your replies.

First of all, we have decided not to rehome Jo-jo, certainly for now anyway.

Regarding us letting our daughter rough handle Jo-jo, that isn't something that we condone. We try to prevent it by keeping them apart when either one of them are being other than gentle. The problem being that Jo-Jo will not keep away - it almost seems like he enjoys it. He has plenty of places to escape to and sometimes, if my daughter wants to play with him and he's not in the mood, he jumps the stairgate and goes upstairs, out of the way.
Our daughter isn't nasty to him and doesn't mean to be a bit rough, it is just her co-ordination skills aren't fully developed yet and what is meant to be a stroke, can sometimes end up as a bit of a slap. She doesn't try and pick him up or pull his tail, she is just a bit heavy handed. I really don't think she has ever hurt him.
I think my choice of words in my post may have painted a darker picture of the way my daughter handles him than it is in reality.

Without a doubt, Jo-jo sees me as 'pack leader' and I think that is why he has never attacked me. Regarding the attacks on my wife, could it be that he is trying to be dominant, as the attacks only seem to happen when she is in a vunerable situation. Whether it is jealousy, attention seeking or trying to be number two in the 'pack', I just don't know. One thing for sure is that Jo-jo is very needy and always has been.

The attack on my daughter may have possibly been that he felt left out, that nobody was giving him any attention, as he has never been anything other than very gentle with her. I must make it clear that Jo-jo's attack on my daughter was totally unprevoked. She was not being rough with him or anything like that, she was amusing herself with one of her Christmas presents. I really don't think that it was rough play fighting either as the attack was very similar to the way he attacks my wife. Those attacks are also unprevoked with no rough play involved. As I said in my first post, he keeps his claws retracted when they play together, even when she is playing with him with a feather on a string - his favourite game. He has been incredibly good with her apart from that one instance.

We don't think Jo-jo has any health issues. He goes for a full health check every year and when we spoke to the vet about his attacks on my wife, the vet said that Siamese cats can be a little unpredictable at times and that if my wife showed any fear of him, that would fuel the behaviour.
As I stated in my first post, my wife can deal with his feisty behaviour towards her by either covering herself up in the duvet or putting him out of the room when he gets 'that look' in his eyes.

I guess I shouldn't have got angry with Jo-jo, but as a father, you are very protective of your child, and when you see this sort of attack on your child, emotion takes over. I'm pretty sure Jo-jo understood why I was angry with him. He is very intelligent after all.

The atmosphere in the house is back to normal again and Jo-jo seems relaxed with all three of us.

I only mentioned about the damage he caused to one of speakers because my hifi is probably my most treasured possession. He has never done anything like that before, so to suddenly do it, made me wonder if it was some sort of revenge? Why else would he do that?

Anyway, we've decided to give things another go. We really don't want to rehome him, but if he does this again, then I think we have to seriouly look at finding him another loving home. As much as we love him, our daughter comes first.

Lymorelynn, I said Jo-jo was a silver tabby point as that is what the vet said he was. I have know idea, he came to us as a stray. I have attached a picture of him so maybe you could enlighten us? He is so lovable and such a character that it is a shame that he has this feisty streak in him. He is the first exotic cat I have ever owned as all my previous cats have been stray moggies! What I find very endearing is that when I call him, he comes running to me, just like a dog. I really hope everything works out for us all as it would be heart breaking to let him go.

Grae.


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

Oh gosh, what lovely photos!


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## Grae (Jan 2, 2015)

Hi Ang2,

These are just a few of the many photo's we have of him.
He is sooo lovable, and a daddy's boy too!

Glad you enjoyed them!

Grae


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Aww lovely pics! Can tell you have a good bond with him  I hope all works out ok.


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Grae, wow he really is an exceptionally handsome fellow isn't he? Gorgeous:001_wub::001_wub::001_wub: I love tabby Siamese cats.

Very pleased to hear you are not thinking of rehoming him.  (I think he would grieve badly if he lost his relationship with you). 

Siamese are very loyal cats and tend to bond closely with one person in the family. They can be possessive of their special person, and can seem very needy, as Jo-Jo is with you. It could be, as you say, when Jo-Jo was suddenly rough with your daughter, he had felt left out, or that his buddy (you), was not paying him enough attention. 

When he goes for your wife it could be attention-seeking as Lynn mentioned, or it could perhaps be jealousy if he feels your wife has had more of your attention than he has. 

I understand it is quite a responsibility for you to be the repository of such strong feelings of affection from your cat. 

When I was a child we had a family cat who was devoted to my mother and possessive of her. My mother could never show physical affection to anyone in the presence of the cat without the cat becoming jealous and cross. We kids learnt quickly not to go near the cat when she was in one of her moods or we would get swiped with a pawful of claws.

It sounds as though your wife has become adept at recognising the warning signs of Jo-Jo becoming annoyed and has learnt to take evasive action to prevent an attack. I think this is the best way to deal with the behaviour.


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## Grae (Jan 2, 2015)

Hi Chillminx, thanks for that reply. I hadn't realised that Siamese cats had a 'special person' as Jo-jo seems to have a very strong bond with both myself and my wife. However on reflection on your comment, Jo-jo will let me do anything to him - give him medication, clean his wounds after a fight etc.. but won't let anyone else do these things. He will come running to me if I call him, but not so often when my wife calls him. When I am ill, he doesn't want to leave my side, and if I cough, he shows concern and says something to me, but he's not like that with my wife. So, yes, I think you are right, I'm Jo-jo's 'special person'.

Jo-jo could be jealous of my wife as he always tries to get between us if we have a cuddle but I still don't understand why he launches himself at her for no apparent reason. This nearly always happens when they are alone together, with me elsewhere in the house. As my wife can diffuse the situation, it is not a problem. It could also be attention seeking as he is very needy with both my wife and myself.

We are now being extra vigilant with Jo-jo and also my little girl. Hopefully if this situation arises again, we will be able to act quickly and diffuse it before he attacks. The only problem here being we can't watch them 24/7...

He is quite a complex character but as Lynn said, his homelessness at such a young age must have had a huge impact on him and very probably left him with some issues.

All we can do now is see how things pan out from here. Hopefully it is a one off occurrence!

Grae


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## QOTN (Jan 3, 2014)

Grae, I think your beautiful boy is a seal tabby point siamese. It sounds as though you are Top Cat as far as Jo-jo is concerned. If so, it should be possible for you show him his boundaries. I have never owned anything other than siamese and orientals and I always let them know when they have done something wrong. You may have been a little over the top when your daughter was attacked but if Jo-jo is now treating you normally again, it may have had the desired effect. From the pictures you have posted I think it would be disastrous for him to be rehomed. Please don't abandon him. These cats have so much love to give their owners.


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## lymorelynn (Oct 4, 2008)

Such a beautiful boy and he clearly adores you :001_tt1: Seal tabby I would say. 
I am so pleased that you have decided to give him another chance :thumbsup: Sadly jealousy is not uncommon in Siamese and nor is attention seeking but if you can accept that you have a very demanding young man I am sure you will be able to work through his problems. 
As to having a 'special person' I had two Siamese girls many years ago and one was devoted to me, the other to my then husband. 'His' cat would not even come downstairs if I was alone in the house but would be at the door as soon as he was home from work. They can be very silly about some things 
Good luck with Jo-Jo and I hope that as your daughter gets older their relationship will get better.


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## OrientalSlave (Jan 26, 2012)

Grae said:


> <snip>
> 
> clean his wounds after a fight etc..
> 
> <snip>


Good grief what does he get up to?


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## Psygon (Apr 24, 2013)

Just been reading this thread and just had to say.. Jo-jo is gorgeous! I love tabby siamese


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

I may get shot down with this comment and OP it is totally up to you how you live your life but, If this was a dog launching themselves at someone and that person having to hide from them, that dog would of been in a dogs home as quick as you can say it! 
I don't think I would be happy at all to have an animal in my house that is constantantly a risk that it was going to attack me or my child! I would have to put a stop to this behaviour straight away!

I may be a dog person, but I had cats for many years and I would not of put up with this from any of them. Cats can be trained, in fact someone in this thread has already said how she has!


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## Grae (Jan 2, 2015)

A seal point tabby eh? Great to know - thanks for that.

OrientalSlave - to answer your question, Jo-jo likes to go out and 'look after his territory'. We live on a modern housing estate and there are a lot of cats around here. As such, all the cats vie for territory which results in fights.
Jo-jo is top cat of this estate as has quite a large area to look after so gets in quite a few fights. Most cats only fight him once as he is very fast and with a longer reach than most cats, has a huge advantage. He normally comes out on top but occasionally comes home with an injury. I don't like him fighting but what can I do? He hates staying in all the time.

Thank you to everyone who has contributed to this thread. I value ALL your opinions!

Grae


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## MollyMilo (Feb 16, 2012)

Jo-Jo is so handsome! I've only just read a few words about him, and I love him! How amazing that he is top cat on the estate! Haha 

He's a gorgeous seal tabby point for sure, I was cuddling one all day yesterday! She's my 3 meezers mum,grandma and great grandma  beautiful colouring. 

I hope the vet didn't advertise him as silver tabby when you were looking for his old owners, never mind they should have chipped him! Enjoy! Can't wait to hear more about him

Check out our Meezer thread


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## JoTerry (Jan 15, 2015)

This happened to my friends daughter when he brought her over for a movie. She is three years old and brought her female kitten. She invited my 4 year old male Tabby for hugs and he jumped on her head, scratches in hairline occurred as dad pulled him off and threw him, but he came back for another try. 

I grabbed my cat an got attacked for a brief second, then he snapped out of his fight or flight mode and calmed down. You cannot proceed if you do not know what is going on with cat. Cat whisperer works, found out a black Jaguar hated his name Diablo. Seems my cat is sexually frustrated and bringing a female kitten was not helpful. I would like to proceed on this information but it involves using other people as Guiney pigs should they come over. Meantime Im locking my cat up in bedroom when guest come over. 

These strange behaviors in our pets are very troublesome, she may be traumatized for life, opting for dogs as pets in her future, and yes, my cat never damages a thing, so messing with my speaker cabinet would definitely be retaliation.


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## OrientalSlave (Jan 26, 2012)

> Seems my cat is sexually frustrated and bringing a female kitten was not helpful.


Sounds like he should have been neutered (castrated) some time ago.


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## sarahecp (Aug 22, 2011)

Wow! What a beautiful boy :001_tt1: :001_tt1: :001_tt1:

I'm so pleased you've decided not to re-home Jo-Jo


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## Jonny and Slush (Jan 13, 2015)

I can't offer any personal advice, but there is something you might find interesting to watch and that is a T.V. show called 'My cat from Hell.' It isn't as negative as it may sound, though the episodes obviously start with a cat that has various behavioral issues.

Each episode Jason goes to the homes and works with the family and pets in the homes to try and find the root cause of the problems and the progress he makes each time is phenomenal.

The reason I mention it is that it is full of great advice that you might find useful to your situation, maybe you will see things in the show that make something click for you with regards to potential reasons for this behavior and you can try some of the solutions he uses to bring peace back into the households.

Hope things go well for you, it is a beautiful thing you did from the start to rescue him, hopefully you and your whole family can find a peaceful happy solution


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

JoTerry said:


> This happened to my friends daughter when he brought her over for a movie. She is three years old and brought her female kitten. She invited my 4 year old male Tabby for hugs and he jumped on her head, scratches in hairline occurred as dad pulled him off and threw him, but he came back for another try.
> 
> I grabbed my cat an got attacked for a brief second, then he snapped out of his fight or flight mode and calmed down. You cannot proceed if you do not know what is going on with cat. Cat whisperer works, found out a black Jaguar hated his name Diablo. Seems my cat is sexually frustrated and bringing a female kitten was not helpful. I would like to proceed on this information but it involves using other people as Guiney pigs should they come over. Meantime I'm locking my cat up in bedroom when guest come over.
> 
> These strange behaviors in our pets are very troublesome, she may be traumatized for life, opting for dogs as pets in her future, and yes, my cat never damages a thing, so messing with my speaker cabinet would definitely be retaliation.


I find this post alarming. This incident need not have happened at all.

I agree with OS, why is your 4 yr old male cat not castrated?

A female kitten should NOT be brought in to the home where there is an un-neutered male cat. Your cat was wound up because of the female's presence.

No kitten or cat should be brought into the resident cat's territory without proper slow/gradual introductions, taking weeks. Cats can't just be put together in one cat's territory without there being repercussions.

The male cat should have been shut away in another room during the visit.

A 3 yr old child should not allowed to carry a kitten around with her when she goes visiting, as though the kitten is a toy.

The child should not have been allowed to call the male cat to her when she was holding the kitten, (and she smelled of the kitten's scent).

There was no need for the male cat to be _thrown_ when the child's father took him off the child. If someone did that to my cat I would be angry with the person.  Just lifting the cat off the child's head quickly and taking him outside the room would have sufficed.

I completely agree you will be doing the right thing in future in shutting your male cat away from your guests, for his own safety.


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## moggie14 (Sep 11, 2013)

Completely agree with OS and CM 
I saw this post this morning and thought it was a joke tbh.
If that child has issues in the future you only have yourself to blame. As the adult I cannot believe you would allow this situation to have occurred at all, very stupid and irresponsible :cursing:


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## jasminex (Oct 16, 2012)

To OP - I have found that my cat Humphrey will sometimes "attack" me or my partner, seemingly unprovoked, but it is usually just that he wants attention/playtime. So perhaps a lot of vigorous play with something like Flying Frenzy would help diffuse Jo-jo's energy, as he would get tired and have used up his desire for hunting/catching (feed him after play). Maybe you already do this, but I couldn't see it mentioned. Anyway good luck, hope things work out, he is a beautiful cat!


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