# Help with getting my cat to come back inside the house



## Becky2013 (Jan 21, 2013)

Hi all, I'm hoping people might have some good suggestions for me. Sorry this is going to be a long story, but I think the detail helps.

My husband and I have two Tonkinese cats - Quintus and Minerva. Quintus is 10 and Minerva is 4. My husband has had them both since before we were married. The cats used to get on reasonably, ie they just ignored each other, but they were never friends.

When my husband and I got married we moved into a new house, which is actually next door to the house my husband lived before. The cats came too, of course. But in the new house, the cat situation changed: Minerva, the younger girl cat, became very territorial and used to shoo Quintus away. Minerva is about 1/3 the size of Quintus, so I'm not sure why he didn't just give her a few good swipes, but he didn't. Instead, he just decided that he would spend most of his time at my husband's old house, with the new tenants who lived there. He popped home to us twice a day for food, but spent basically all day and all night with the new tenants.

My husband and I were a bit sad about that, but he had a good life so we didn't try to change things. But now the tenants have moved out, and the new people don't want to have Quintus around. So poor Quintus is very upset and has no real home - he still won't come inside our house (he gets fed in a kind of lean-to outside our laundry). He seems to spend a lot of time outside, just sort of hanging around.

I want to get him to come and be our cat again, but it seems so difficult. If I pick him up and carry him inside he struggles and runs away as soon as I put him down. I guess I need advice on (1) how to convince him that he "belongs" with us and should come inside, and (2) how to get Minerva to accept him as having a legitimate claim to being in the house.

I would really appreciate any suggestions.

Many thanks,

Becky.


----------



## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Hi Becky -- what a sad story 


It seems what has happened is that as Minerva became very territorial when you moved house, Quintus went back to what he remembered as being his old home, (when he lived next door originally) It was a relief for him no doubt to get away from Minerva. 

As Quintus was more or less living completely next door with your neighbour it probably would have been much kinder if they had taken him with them when they moved (with your agreement I mean).

If you want Quintus to come home I think you are going to have to start all over again as though he is a new cat. This would mean keeping him shut in your house for a month, and going through slow and gradual 
(re-) introductions with Minerva. 

It will mean keeping the cats in different parts of the house,e.g. Quintus upstairs and Minerva downstairs so she has access to the outdoors. It also will mean scent swapping between the two cats, letting them glimpse each other through a crack in the door and eventually bringing them together under supervision, then feeding them together (under supervision). It will need patience and dedication if it is to have a chance of working. 

You could also get some plug in Feliway Diffusers for the areas where the cats will each spend most time in the house. And give a course of Zylkene to Quintus, to help build his self confidence. It is a supplement, available on line or from the vet, and has had good results helping anxious, insecure cats.

Quintus will need to feel there is a part of your house that he can call his own, and where he is safe from Minerva's bullying. It may be that for quite a long time to come you will need to keep the cats physically separate in your house, and certainly when you are not there to supervise. I have to do this with 2 of my cats.


----------



## jill3 (Feb 18, 2009)

I think what chillminx has wrote is very good and so cannot add much more.
Just that you will have to be very patient because it will take time.
It will be worth it though.
It is a good thing it is Winter and the weather is not nice so you can keep him in. (when you can catch him)
One thing I have thought of is that while he is separated it would be good if you both could take it in turns keeping him company. Also interacting with him as well. I.E Playing with a wand toy with him.
Also a Bag of Dreamies. My cats love them and will do anything for you.
So a few treats at playtime might just win him round.


----------



## Becky2013 (Jan 21, 2013)

Thank you so much both of you. I think you are right - the only solution is patience and hard work. It seems too cruel to keep Quintus shut in the house now though - I am in New Zealand so it's actually summer, and he loves prowling around. I might try more intermediate tactics before that.

But thank you both so much for taking the time to write such thoughtful responses.


----------



## koekemakranka (Aug 2, 2010)

Chillminx advice is spot-on. :thumbup1:


----------



## Becky2013 (Jan 21, 2013)

Hi everyone,

Just an update: I talked over all your great advice with my husband, and we've decided that we'll make one of the rooms in our house Quintus' room. We will shut him up in there overnight, which he won't like but he'll get over, and in the daytime he can roam as he likes. We'll give him a litter tray and food in his room. That way at least he'll have a corner of the house for himself. Once he is comfortable there we will re-introduce him to Minerva, always giving him the option of going back to his room.

I've really appreciated everyone's kind thoughts.

Becky.


----------



## jill3 (Feb 18, 2009)

I hope he will like his new room. You could put some activity toys in there. Even make some out of card board boxes.
Zooplus on the internet have a wide range and also they have some that light up in the dark so he can play at night. Sound thoughts that might keep you awake

Let us know how he gets on x


----------

