# Advice on rehoming my dog



## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

I'm in a realy tough position at the moment having to consider rehoming one of my dogs. We have 3 dogs and I am now almost 7 months pregnant. Our youngest pup in only 10 months old, we got him before finding out about the pregnancy which was a happy surprise. 

The main problem is that our young dog Oscar is currently going through his adolecent period and is pushing all of the boundaries he can. The moment i turn my back he is starting fights with the other 2 dogs, chewing or destroying anything he can lay his paws on and causing general mischeif. Having been through all this before with our others, who are now excellent dogs, I know it is likely a phase due to his age however, I'm finding that it is causing me a lot of stress and I am losing my patience a lot more quickly due to the pregnancy. My main concern is that in 2 months I will have a baby to look after as well and I will have even less energy, time and patience to dedicate to him. I know he will be a brilliant dog eventually but I am concerned that the lack of attention he will get when the baby comes along will mean he won't get the training and discipline he needs and could learn to further behavioural problems. 

He's such a friendly lad and he loves people, and being so young I know he would find a new home in a second and he would soon settle with new owners, but the thought of giving him up has me in tears every time i think about it. Deep down I am pretty sure this is the right decision all round. My partner is behind me 100% whatever I decide as he works full time and as he says I'm the one who has to deal with him all day. 

I just feel like I need some advice on what to do. I know ultimately it is my decision, but finding it so difficult. 

Also could anyone give some advice on the best way to go about rehoming a dog. Have read some dresdful things about the RSPCA so am reluctant to take him there. 

Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.


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## SiobhanG (Apr 24, 2012)

I totally sympathise with you. I'm 30 weeks pregnant and we recently took on a new dog, Milo. He's 2 yrs old and his previous owners didn't seem to teach him very much. His recall is non-existent and he pulls on the lead quite a lot. Luckily, he's not been starting fights and causing any trouble to other people but I've been finding it fairly tough and my pregnancy hasn't been entirely smooth.

My partner has been really helpful, he gets up early with me to take him on his morning walk and we walk him together in the evenings just in case Milo gets too strong on the lead for me. I do walk him on my own in the middle of day but I always have to stop and sit down for a rest. We're just persevering with training and it is slowly working. I do a few sessions in the house with him during the day and then out on the evening walk too.

Do you have any family that could help you if your partner is busy at work?


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> I'm in a realy tough position at the moment having to consider rehoming one of my dogs. We have 3 dogs and I am now almost 7 months pregnant. Our youngest pup in only 10 months old, we got him before finding out about the pregnancy which was a happy surprise.
> 
> The main problem is that our young dog Oscar is currently going through his adolecent period and is pushing all of the boundaries he can. The moment i turn my back he is starting fights with the other 2 dogs, chewing or destroying anything he can lay his paws on and causing general mischeif. Having been through all this before with our others, who are now excellent dogs, I know it is likely a phase due to his age however, I'm finding that it is causing me a lot of stress and I am losing my patience a lot more quickly due to the pregnancy. My main concern is that in 2 months I will have a baby to look after as well and I will have even less energy, time and patience to dedicate to him. I know he will be a brilliant dog eventually but I am concerned that the lack of attention he will get when the baby comes along will mean he won't get the training and discipline he needs and could learn to further behavioural problems.
> 
> ...


He won't. He could be the best dog ever, but he won't find a home in a second. Rescues are bursting to the seams. To be honest, if they assess him and he shows signs of aggression, he might never get the chance to be rehomed. There are just too many dogs in rescues, even adorable 8 week old pedigree puppies and fully trained adult dogs. If you are going to rehome him, you need to be realistic about his chances. He could be in a rescue for years - and most probably will be for months, at least.

If you really can't keep him, and I do appreciate that pregnancy is hard enough without an unruly pup, I'd take him back to where you got him from. Most breeders would want their puppies back rather than them going to kennels, and if he is a rescue it is almost certain that the contract will require you to give him back should you not be able to keep him.

Would getting a trainer to help you get those first commands learnt and him more under control be possible? Could your OH help when he isn't working, by taking him to training classes and giving you a break?

As for choosing a rescue to take him too....start with giving him back. That's best for you and him. I don't know when giving him back wouldn't work, but if it doesn't, you'll need to start contacting places. It's highly likely that at least some of the places will be full and can't take him. Hopefully, somewhere good will. The Dog's Trust tends to be good, and have a no PTS policy, but last time we spoke to them the policy only stood for dogs who were completely sound. Your dog could react to other dogs during the assessment - so he could be PTS anyway. Bare that in mind when you are choosing.

What breed is he? You could also look for breed rescues etc, who are likely to be more able to help, if they aren't already packed.

I apologize if this sounds blunt, but so many people seem to be ignoring the crisis, or pretending that it can't be so bad. We had three dogs given to us by rescues who are bursting at the seams last night, and one just dumped outside the door. It was sweltering here last night - and the puppy is crying his heart out and as scared as anything.

We aren't even a rescue. We just pick up the pieces when it comes to the stage that rescues just can't do anything more.


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Thanks for your response. Glad your training is going well. 

I think one of the most upsetting things for me is that I know with time he will be a great dog. He has good recall, walks great on the lead and knows all his basic commands. And our oldest dog, a collie cross, was a million times worse than him when she was his age. But then we had the time to dedicate to her training. 

As i said the main issue is that he can't be left alone for even 5 seconds without trying to engage the others in play fights. They will all be fast asleep and I go upstairs and the moment i turn the corner at the top of the stairs and I am out of sight he starts. He know's its naughty because as soon as I come back down stairs he runs to his bed and lays down. 

A couple of weeks ago we had him done as we thought it might help calm him down (wishful thinking) and when he was at the vets all day it made me realise how easy it is with just the other 2. 

If i wasn't expecting it wouldnt even be an issue, as i said i've been through a lot worse with our collie but I'm just concerned that when the baby comes I wont have to time to dedicate to his training.

The advice i've read is that you should start paying less attention to your dogs leading up to the birth so they get used to having less attention for once the baby comes. But this is impossible with him, he literally cannot be left unsupervised without causing some sort of mayhem!


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> Thanks for your response. Glad your training is going well.
> 
> I think one of the most upsetting things for me is that I know with time he will be a great dog. He has good recall, walks great on the lead and knows all his basic commands. And our oldest dog, a collie cross, was a million times worse than him when she was his age. But then we had the time to dedicate to her training.
> 
> ...


Does he have a crate? Is he crate-trained?

Crates tend to be life savers when you've got a troublesome dogs, and they are great for kids too.

Edit: Obviously for the dog to go in, not the child. I'm not that mean  It just gives your dog somewhere that is "his", that he doesn't need to fight the other dogs for, and that the child can't bother him.


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Hi Elles Belles, Thanks for your response. When i say he starts fights, i mean play fights. He has never shown even the slightest signs of aggression. He is a really friendly little dog. He does know his basic commands and does generally seem to learn quite well. 

He is a whippet cross, we got him from a private ad when he was almost 3 months old, they weren't a breader, i dont know where they got him from. So returning him wouldnt be an option. 

I understand the crisis facing dogs homes and rehoming centres and have volunteered at them before. I would never before have even considered rehoming a dog, I have had dogs all of my life and have dedicated a lot of time and effort into training our others. I just feel that at the moment I am not doing him justice as I am unable to provide the training and attention he needs. Plus i just dont know if i can cope with the stress of it all. I have been in tears every day this week thinking, if i can't even go upstairs to the toilet with him causing mayhem how am i supposed to change a nappy or feed the baby without being constantly interupted by him causing mayhem. I love him to bits and even considering this is causing me a lot of heart ache but I just dont know how else i will be able to cope.


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Yeah he is crate trained. We first got one for our collie and agree it is a life saver. He really likes his crate but whines constantly when he is in his but the others are out of theirs.


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## Jugsmalone (Apr 11, 2011)

gsmith86 said:


> Yeah he is crate trained. We first got one for our collie and agree it is a life saver. He really likes his crate *but whines constantly when he is in his *but the others are out of theirs.


Do you give him anything in the crate like a chewy bone or kong?


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Yeah give him a chew toy but he's not interested in it when the other are out, he just wants to come out and play with them. As i say he so friendly and sociable he just wants to be with the other dogs or me but as he is still so young and playful he just starts play fights with them constantly and results in all 3 of them running around the house chasing each other. Its like a mad house! And its just not the atmosphere really i need when i am heavily pregnant and then when having to look after a newborn baby.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

Reading your posts I get the impression you don't really want to let him go but think is the easy option. He's very young and this stage won't last that long, its clearly upsetting you just the thought of it and after maybe some initial relief I suspect you will regret it big time.

Wouldn't you be better working on the crate being seen as enjoyable so that you can pop him in when you need to be doing other things. Perhaps also consider a dog walker or day care for a while


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

Could you give him a fortnight to try and prepare him for the baby?

Crate training should help. Is there anything he really loves, that you could giveh him to settle him? Something like a cold kong, or a pigs ear?

Put him in regularly through the day and ignore his whining. Give him his treat when he goes in, and he should get used to it. The whining will drive you up the wall, so loud music helps, or something good on the TV, or going into the garden. He should get used to it, even if he plays up for a while. It's like toilet training - it feels like they'll never get it, and then all of a sudden they do.

If he could get used to being crated, I think it would make it much easier to cope with him and the baby. If you still didn't think you could cope, at least he'd be more settled for being kennelled.

I did understand that it was just play fights, but it doesn't come across that way in behavioural testing. There are no options for the dog being scared, or excited, or playful. It's very scientific - do the ears go up, is there growling, are the teeth being bared.

I've conducted the tests, and it's heartbreaking, especially if its a dog that you know is absolutely fine at home but is just scared/not used to kennels. 

That's not to say that you can't rehome him. If you can't cope, you have no choice. It's just so that you don't have unrealistic expectations about what the choices are. You are extremely unlikely to be called and told your dog has been rehomed within the next 6 months, and we get quite a lot of calls from people asking why we hadn't bothered to tell them that their dog had been rehomed. It's because they haven't been. Some have been here for over a year now.

Middle-aged dogs have it worst, in my opinion. People love puppies, so the 10 week olds go quickly - anyone who doesn't want a puppy typically doesn't want to have to train it, so they go for an adult whose been fully trained.

How are your other two dogs at being crate trained? You could put them all in for a while, to give yourself some time, and get them ready for the changes when baby comes. 

You could also try covering his crate with a blanket so he can't see out -that works to settle some of our unruly ones.

I hope this makes sense - I'm on my phone while being clambered on by menace puppies.


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

He has been crate trained for as long as we've had him and he does generally like his crate, but doesn't really like being in it when the others are out of theirs. I do ignore him when he whines, and I am able to get things done etc when he is in his cage, and think it would help when the baby comes. However I feel really guilty having him shut in his cage for a lot of the day, and was one of the main reasons for me considering rehoming. When he is in his cage I just think someone else could be giving him more attention and time and he wouldn't have to be in his cage all the time.


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> He has been crate trained for as long as we've had him and he does generally like his crate, but doesn't really like being in it when the others are out of theirs. I do ignore him when he whines, and I am able to get things done etc when he is in his cage, and think it would help when the baby comes. However I feel really guilty having him shut in his cage for a lot of the day, and was one of the main reasons for me considering rehoming. When he is in his cage I just think someone else could be giving him more attention and time and he wouldn't have to be in his cage all the time.


That's just not true, though.

You are looking at this from the wrong point of view. If he stays with you, he is with a family and a home that he loves. He needs some work, and he'll have a shock when the baby comes, but so will your other dogs. And if he is crated for a while, that's okay. If you start now, and give him something to distract him, he should stop whining (you won't want that when baby is sleeping) and start not minding being in there).

If you rehome him, he'll be in a kennel for 23.5 hours a day, with lots of other dogs, and he'll be very confused. He'll get to run outside, and eventually he'll get a new family, but rehoming him won't give him a better life.

(I'm typing one handed and on the phone at the same time. Apologies for spelling etc.)


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Thanks for this reassurance. I think i'm just feeling really guilty at the thought of him being shut in his cage for much of the day and feel like i'm being a bad owner. I would hate to get rid of him, i love him to bits and know how much potential he has to be a really great dog. I just feel like i would be letting him down by not having the time to devote to him and his training like we did with our other 2. But i suppose like you said being crate trained for a while until he grows up a bit can't hurt i suppose.


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> Thanks for this reassurance. I think i'm just feeling really guilty at the thought of him being shut in his cage for much of the day and feel like i'm being a bad owner. I would hate to get rid of him, i love him to bits and know how much potential he has to be a really great dog. I just feel like i would be letting him down by not having the time to devote to him and his training like we did with our other 2. But i suppose like you said being crate trained for a while until he grows up a bit can't hurt i suppose.


No worries. It's easy to wonder if your pets would be better with someone else, but it's very rarely true. Especially at 7 months pregnant - this heat can't help! I'm bad enough not pregnant 

I work with assistance dogs and they spend a lot of time in crates, purely because we have so many. We have 4 toys for each kennel, and use 2 a day - so they don't get too used to them. They've also got rawhide and balls and chewy teddies. They get used to it, and they seem as happy as anything most of the time, and put themselves away when they do have free run. They love having somewhere that is theres. And some of them like to steal each others blankets and hide them, which is quite entertaining.

I'm sat in one kennel at the moment, with some 11 month old flatcoat retrievers. They are still adjusting to the crate and learning not to cry (we can't let them cry, they'd set the whole unit off and it'd be crazy) but they will get there. So will yours 

Have you got any pictures of him?


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## newfiesmum (Apr 21, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> I'm in a realy tough position at the moment having to consider rehoming one of my dogs. We have 3 dogs and I am now almost 7 months pregnant. Our youngest pup in only 10 months old, we got him before finding out about the pregnancy which was a happy surprise.
> 
> The main problem is that our young dog Oscar is currently going through his adolecent period and is pushing all of the boundaries he can. The moment i turn my back he is starting fights with the other 2 dogs, chewing or destroying anything he can lay his paws on and causing general mischeif. Having been through all this before with our others, who are now excellent dogs, I know it is likely a phase due to his age however, I'm finding that it is causing me a lot of stress and I am losing my patience a lot more quickly due to the pregnancy. My main concern is that in 2 months I will have a baby to look after as well and I will have even less energy, time and patience to dedicate to him. I know he will be a brilliant dog eventually but I am concerned that the lack of attention he will get when the baby comes along will mean he won't get the training and discipline he needs and could learn to further behavioural problems.
> 
> ...


It is unlikely that the RSPCA would take him anyway. Last I heard they only take dogs who are being ill treated, they no longer take dogs for rehoming otherwise.

Is there a whippet Rescue? Or does Greyhound Rescue deal with those as well? Either way, they are also bursting at the seams. To be perfectly honest, you also have to consider that your hormones are all over the place and if you were not pregnant you would feel completely different, even without the baby to consider.

What about putting him in another room, say the kitchen, with a babygate across the doorway when you are not able to be there with him? It seems like a better option than a crate.



gsmith86 said:


> Thanks for your response. Glad your training is going well.
> 
> I think one of the most upsetting things for me is that I know with time he will be a great dog. He has good recall, walks great on the lead and knows all his basic commands. And our oldest dog, a collie cross, was a million times worse than him when she was his age. But then we had the time to dedicate to her training.
> 
> ...


He doesn't know he's naughty because he runs to his bed when he sees you. He knows that you are going to nag him when he sees you. Dogs do not think that way and do not know what they have done after the event.

It can take a lot longer than two weeks for the testosterone to dissipate completely and for a neutering to start having an effect. I have heard people say it was a month or more before there was any change, so you might consider that as well.


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Yeah it is getting difficult now. And getting nervous about having a new baby to look after. I think I feel like the other 2 will cope better as they are a bit more independent now they are a bit older whereas he is still quite needy and needs a lot of attention. Like I said I just hate putting him in his cage for a lot of the day and hate feeling like i'm neglecting him but it won't have to be forever and he does generally seem quite happy in there. I think investing in some new toys and rotating them is a good idea. Thanks so much for this, I feel a lot better about it all now. 

I'm new to this site, i think i attached a picture but we'll see if it works!


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## hazel pritchard (Jun 28, 2009)

Hi great looking pup, you could try contacting Lurcher Link,(website) they are a great group of owners/fosters/homers on there, its the place i got my whippet x from
Good luck.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

Am really glad you are rethinking :thumbup:

Try to establish a routine that suits you all with time in & out of the crate. If the bouncy play rattles your nerves do you have a garden - just thinking get them used to the idea they can play & dash about in the garden but expect them to be calm in the house. As Newfiesmum said maybe position pups crate in a different room, or would your other dogs be crated but with their doors open perhaps.

When Dougie was a pup, admittedly I did not have a baby to deal with, but if there was something I needed to do and couldn't be watching him would pop him in his crate even if it was just for 10 or 15 minutes. Have you taught him a go to bed command?


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## Kylia (May 21, 2012)

Hello, 
I don't have babies but I have friends/relatives who call around with their children, from a young age I taught my dogs to sit when the children/babies were about now their behavior is exemplary.

I think you need to teach him to be calm around young babies, so if you have any friends with babies/children see if they will help you out and get practicing, he sounds smart so it shouldn't take long to train him.

I remember reading that the most important part of dog training is teaching a dog to have self control, I have made it a priority with my two and it has paid off.

BTW mine play fight every day, the rugs end up in a ball


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## Kylia (May 21, 2012)

There is some good advice via this link x

Dogs And Children


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## EllesBelles (May 14, 2010)

gsmith86 said:


> Yeah it is getting difficult now. And getting nervous about having a new baby to look after. I think I feel like the other 2 will cope better as they are a bit more independent now they are a bit older whereas he is still quite needy and needs a lot of attention. Like I said I just hate putting him in his cage for a lot of the day and hate feeling like i'm neglecting him but it won't have to be forever and he does generally seem quite happy in there. I think investing in some new toys and rotating them is a good idea. Thanks so much for this, I feel a lot better about it all now.
> 
> I'm new to this site, i think i attached a picture but we'll see if it works!


What an adorable face he has...he's got looking innocent down to a tee 

No worries. We are a pretty friendly bunch here  You should hang around if you've got time, I picked up some great training tips here. Also, there's always someone who has a dog that's done something slightly naughtier than mine, so it makes me feel better :001_tt2:


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## gsmith86 (May 24, 2012)

Thanks for all of your advice on this. Its been such a help. We are currently trying to properly secure the garden. He is also an escape artist so can't really be in the garden unsupervised either, but we're working on sorting this, which i think will make things easier.

He knows his "in your bed" command and goes in happily and always give him a treat when he goes in. So he knows its a happy place. And as i've said, he doesn't mind being in it, I think it's more my guilt about him being in there. But while he's still young I think it is probably the only option.

He is very smart and know's his wait command. I'm not really concerned how he will be with the baby, my main concern is the lack of time I will have. But as you have all pointed out, he can be in his crate while I have stuff to be getting on with. I think my main issue to deal with is myself and not feeling too guilty about it. After all my collie was a million times worse and now can be trusted on her own without getting upto mischeif so hopefully as he grows up we will be able to trust him too and he won't need to be in his crate as often. 

You have all been so helpful and have made me feel so much better. My partner has just got in from work and said I seem much happier today. So thank you all so much. 

Yeah he has such an innocent face! 

Will definately stick around for more tips and advice, you've all been so helpful.


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## su1001 (Feb 16, 2012)

sorry if I've missed it somewhere but whereabouts are you please ?


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## Grace_Lily (Nov 28, 2010)

:thumbup: I'm SO pleased that you are reconsidering. Someone else mentioned that from your posts it appears that you don't really want to rehome him, and would regret it in the long run, I totally agree.

You've had loads of great tips on here so no point in me repeating them, but one thing that I don't think has been mentioned is that slowly but surely over the next couple of months you should see the hormonal effects of his neuter kick in, and it should make him a little calmer. Good luck!


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## bluegirl (May 7, 2012)

I know someone who was in the same position as you. Had one child, and 2 older dogs, both who'd been rips as pups. They bought a pup off me and all seemed well, she then found out she was pregnant. They found pup hard work and I was working with them, they didn't give me any reason to think things were going from bad to worse as they also reported back that pup was doing well at puppy classes, he was neutered around 10 mths max and hubby was taking him out on his own at dinnertime because pup was wanting to get the other 2 dogs to play all the time and they were snapping at him. They still had him when new baby was born, but shortly afterwards all went quiet. I tried to continue contact but got no feedback, eventually she replied to me saying they no longer had him and they had given him to a retired couple who already had a cocker and lived near them so still saw him. As a breeder I'm devastated that she didn't say, I would have taken him back, now I have a pup out there who I don't know who he is with, which may or may not have worked out and she will not give me any further info on.

I hope you can work this out but do keep the breeder informed as its breaking my heart losing contact with my pup.


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