# Am I over reacting



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it

http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg

His words...... "That's epic"

I'm really hurt at that because for one he has never said me or anything of mine is epic, secondly I hate my body and I'm the opposite of her and lastly I have 0 chance of getting a physique like hers

Am I right to be upset?


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

We can all get hurt by off the cuff remarks, but he is with you not some lass who looks like the picture so that should tell you something


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

Oh hell, here we go again.


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


No, you shouldn't be upset. He's a guy, what did you expect when you showed him that?

The majority of women have zero chance of getting a physique like hers, which is heavily air brushed I may add.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Actually any able bodied person could get that if they put in the graft


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## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

right votes in now people 
how long will this thread run for? 

I will vote 8 pages 


I wouldn't be offended, you showed him it, he said epic hardly the same as oh wow she is amazing I wish you looked like her, if you don't want him to give an opinion why show him? you probably find other men attractive, doesn't mean you want to be with them though.


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

I wouldn't worry, I'm sure if he didn't want too be with you he wouldn't be.

You need too stop worrying about what others think and learn to love yourself.

You should be with someone because you want to be with them not because you need too be with them.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

redroses2106 said:


> right votes in now people
> how long will this thread run for?
> 
> I will vote 8 pages
> ...


I didn't show him to get his opinion

The pic was in a thread we were reading, it's not like I specifically showed him it and said what do you think of her

And there's a difference between finding someone attractive and thinking they look epic


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

My oh is always saying people are hot - actresses, models, we have a friend who is a model (and shes amazingly cool) and he'll describe her as hot

I dont recall him ever saying im "hot"

But you know what they ARE hot - I cant blame him for having eyes  And he is with me, I can only assume for a reason, so why worry about not being the hottest (or most epic) girl in the village.

Also, she (in your link) is pretty epic. So yes I think your over reacting.


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## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

Men look at women. End of. 

Don't you look at other men and think 'he's nice'. 

Tip/ don't show him pics of fit healthy young women and expect him to say 'ewww gross'.


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## CharleyRogan (Feb 20, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


I know how it feels! It hurts. But you can do it, I know you have medical problems, but there must be something. Could you do swimming? You can get something off the doctors and you get free or very cheap price gym memberships. My sister got it and paid a pound per visit.

But at the same time, men will be men and sometimes they don't think before they speak.

You sound like you are incredibly unhappy with yourself, come only you can change this! Why can't you be like one of them models? Okay it might take you longer due to your illness but you could do it!


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Actually any able bodied person could get that if they put in the graft


Totally disagree. She does not have the body of a typical woman. She started out with a better than average bod and probably puts several hours per day into making it look that way. You can tell she lifts weights. Not many people can devote that much time to their physique because they have a life.

If you take away the airbrushing and show her real skin, she might even have cellulite.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I didn't show him to get his opinion
> 
> The pic was in a thread we were reading, it's not like I specifically showed him it and said what do you think of her
> 
> And there's a difference between finding someone attractive and thinking they look epic


I disagree - if someone I was with said wow find her very attractive would be more upset than if they said simply epic - epic is just a comment about an unattainable woman whereas I find her attractive is more personal and real. Well I know what I mean anyway!


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## Catz1 (Sep 19, 2011)

Don't let comments like that upset you, he made a comment that I'm sure a lot of men would make but he didn't say it to hurt you. 

Have you ever said you thought a male celeb was good looking? Did it mean you though less of your bf or fancied him any less? I doubt it, so why would him saying "epic" mean he thought any less of you. 

I think you need to work on your self esteem, try to focus more on your positive qualities then on the things you don't like about yourself. We all have insecurities but we can't punish other people for them.


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## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

DoodlesRule said:


> I disagree - if someone I was with said wow find her very attractive would be more upset than if they said simply epic - epic is just a comment about an unattainable woman whereas I find her attractive is more personal and real. Well I know what I mean anyway!


yes this is what I was getting at, epic is like saying awesome or cool, it's hardly as bad as saying someone is gorgeous and beautiful, and even if he does find actresses, models, singers attractive that's ok because he's with you and he's very unlikely to meet the woman in the picture so nothing to be worrying about really.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

I think this says more about you than your OH Tink 

I joke about with the OH about stuff like this, it doesn't bother me if he thinks a girl is hot, epic, sexy, attractive, sex on legs, a "ride" ( that's a NI saying), I often will point good looking girls out, and comment on nice face, boobs, figures and bums and point them out to him too  I can do it because I know he's with me because he loves me, and everyone looks, as long as they don't touch don't care.. Shock faint horror don't even have an issue with men who watch porn while in relationships....  :ihih: :devil:

So yes your over reacting


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> My oh is always saying people are hot - actresses, models, we have a friend who is a model (and shes amazingly cool) and he'll describe her as hot
> 
> I dont recall him ever saying im "hot"
> 
> ...


Well you probably don't hate yourself or your body



Lavenderb said:


> Men look at women. End of.
> 
> Don't you look at other men and think 'he's nice'.
> 
> Tip/ don't show him pics of fit healthy young women and expect him to say 'ewww gross'.


You are right, next time I'll use my spidey senses and look forward in a topic before reading it 

Of course I think other men are nice, I don't however think they are epic


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## Goblin (Jun 21, 2011)

I'm probably not the only bloke who dislikes muscular women. They look "wrong" somehow.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

CharleyRogan said:


> ! Why can't you be like one of them models? !


Because that look requires weight lifting

As good as swimming will be (and I am thinking of going) I won't get me that look


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## Bloodraine5252 (Jan 13, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Well you probably don't hate yourself or your body


I have incredibly low self esteem. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror. I feel fat and ugly.

However, my bf is with me and loves me. Comments about some random, airbrushed photo wouldn't bother me. As long as he didn't say "I wish you had a body like that" it shouldn't get you down.

Even when we go out, I'll point out girls that I think are pretty. If he agrees I don't get huffy or angry. I accept that he looks regardless, I may as well join in. Its me he loves and is going home with at the end of the night!


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

Yes, you are overreacting.

It's not your OH's fault you are unhappy with the way you look.

Try to work on loving yourself regardless of how you might look physically. Self-hate has nothing to do with physical appearance, and changing the way you look won't change how you feel.


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## Catz1 (Sep 19, 2011)

Epic is just a descriptive word some people use, around here its "savage" and in other places she'd be fine, a ride, a stunner etc. it doesn't mean anything! 

I can guarantee he has not given her a second thought since you showed him the picture so don't waste your time dwelling on it and upsetting yourself.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

I despair of you really! Yes you are being daft, on the attractiveness scale is your boyfriend likely to be able to get a woman who looked like that picture? 

If he had said I wish you looked like that or made a personal derogatory remark by all means be hurt.

Personally given a choice I wouldn't want to look like that I think some one like say Marilyn Monroe is streets ahead - not now obviously lol but when she was alive. Or a living person I think Caro Emerald is beautiful and a proper womanly woman


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## Sleeping_Lion (Mar 19, 2009)

Sorry, but you either have to have a job that gives you that sort of musculo skeletal structure, or you have to go to a gym. I swing a hammer with a 1m fibreglass handle for several hours on end, so have good arm muscles, and have to walk on track and wander up and down embankments, so that gives good muscle definition for a lot of my body. But you only get out what you put in, if you want to steam pasta, then fine, you'd end up with something less than perfect. If you want a good body, you have to work for it.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

DoodlesRule said:


> is your boyfriend likely to be able to get a woman who looked like that picture?


That's not the point



Sleeping_Lion said:


> . If you want a good body, you have to work for it.


Totally agree


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## Aurelie (Apr 10, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


What did you want him to say? You can't show your boyfriend a picture of a buff woman in a bikini and then be upset when he says something nice about her. Your poor boyfriend didn't stand a chance in that little skit did he?

If I showed my husband that picture I would expect him to say she looks great. She does look great - she spent a lot of time earning that body.


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Well you probably don't hate yourself or your body
> 
> You are right, next time I'll use my spidey senses and look forward in a topic before reading it
> 
> Of course I think other men are nice, I don't however think they are epic


I have major self esteem issues and very little/no self confidence resulting from yrs of mental and physical abuse. Dont assume.

I can just appreciate that there are good looking women in the world and my BF isnt a blind Eunach. Also, I cant expect him to switch of being a man with eyes just because I dont like what i see in the mirror..


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Yes you are overreacting. Your OH gave his opinion albeit probably not tactfully. So what! He's with YOU and that's what counts.

Why get upset by some plastic fantastic bimbo in a pic? Life's too short.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> That's not the point
> 
> Totally agree


Off course its the point you silly girl - if your bloke lusts after Angelina jolie or Kate Moss it aint likely to happen is it!!

The young lady in the picture could be incredibly happy and loves working out to look muscley - or she could have serious self esteem issues herself which is why she has clearly done some serious working out to change her from a normal womanly shape to something different. Who knows.

Try counting your blessings - ie focus on what you do have good in your life


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Tinkerbell, are you having any counselling or treatment of any kind for your self esteem & negativity? 

It might be worth looking into, I have serious esteem issues, due to bullying in my past & a load of crappy people who I have thankfully cut out of my life. 

Your issues with your OH- the concern he's looking at 'epic' women & the fact that you feel a need to control him may push him away & will ultimately destroy your relationship. 

One thing I've learned is that in order to love others I had to learn to love myself, it's a long journey but well worth it.


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Why do you think Epic is so hurtful? I would have thought the words "Awesome" "sexy" "womanly", "fancyable", "she's such a babe" or words like that would be worse.... but Epic??? Seriously??? Ben Hur is an Epic!! or what about Sparticus that's Epic!!


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

I don't know what has happened to you too make you feel the way you do but I am truly sorry.

You said you cut your hair because it made you feel feminine but then you are upset that your oh looks at a girl that is rather feminine, you cannot have it both ways. Unfortunately men do look and they also speak without thinking. Please don't get a downer on yourself, maybe next time you see a rather hot looking male perhaps you should tell your other half that the guy looks fit. Give him a taste of his own medicine.


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Page 4 and counting.....


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Aurelie said:


> What did you want him to say? You can't show your boyfriend a picture of a buff woman in a bikini and then be upset when he says something nice about her. Your poor boyfriend didn't stand a chance in that little skit did he?
> 
> If I showed my husband that picture I would expect him to say she looks great. She does look great - she spent a lot of time earning that body.


He should have said nothing, it's not like I asked for his opinion!



DoodlesRule said:


> Off course its the point you silly girl - if your bloke lusts after Angelina jolie or Kate Moss it aint likely to happen is it!!
> 
> The young lady in the picture could be incredibly happy and loves working out to look muscley - or she could have serious self esteem issues herself which is why she has clearly done some serious working out to change her from a normal womanly shape to something different. Who knows.
> 
> Try counting your blessings - ie focus on what you do have good in your life


So it's ok he thinks someone's better than me as long as he has no chance with her


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Iheartcats said:


> Why do you think Epic is so hurtful? I would have thought the words "Awesome" "sexy" "womanly", "fancyable", "she's such a babe" or words like that would be worse.... but Epic??? Seriously??? Ben Hur is an Epic!! or what about Sparticus that's Epic!!


To me epic means brilliant/awesome/the best of the best/better than x etc


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

Gawd - my dad's advice to me on my poor taste in men who turn out to be pigs was actions speak louder than words.

He is with you, he is your carer, he puts up with you laying down the law about kindles or whatever it was


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> So it's ok he thinks someone's better than me as long as he has no chance with her


Its ok to appreciate another persons hard work and good body, so long as its only appreciating! Its not like hes running off into the sunset with her, he is just appreciating that she has an amazing body which is undeniable.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Oh just looked at the picture, and she does look great  That took hours and hours in the gym, she is ripped so I'd say she has been on a strict diet SERIOUSLY strict. I'm sure she has battled mentally and physically to get a body like that and and has some serious will power and determination, and very little life outside the gym or her fitness diet regime sod that I'd rather keep my lardy arse ( piled on 4 stone after surgery) , acknowledge I am no longer allowed to go to the gym or run, or cycle or lift weights I could go on and on, and bloody enjoy my life, life is to short and it's for living.....

I couldn't exercise but still lost 2.5 stone through changing my eating, of your not happy with yourself then change what you can... Your Bf loves you, he's been with you a long time, and he is your carer, I know this can put a strain on a relationship, but you will push him away if you carry on the path of self loathing. Stop yapping about stuff and DO something about it..............


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## Sleeping_Lion (Mar 19, 2009)

If you can't have an open, honest relationship with your partner, which includes expressing their opinions, is it worth being with them?


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## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

Well I think she looks "epic" "amazing" "attractive" and so on and I am sure my OH definitely would too but its an opinion...a comment...a passing remark. 

He is a man bless him. Its normal to appreciate a womans beauty and has no bearing on his thoughts or feelings for you.

Start to love yourself a little and these sorts of comments will be water off a ducks back


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

How do you KNOW that he thinks someone is "better" than you. Better at what exactly? It sounds like you are mind-reading what you believe he is thinking bu you don't know for sure and you are imagining all sorts of scenarios in your head which are probably not even true.


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> So it's ok he thinks someone's better than me as long as he has no chance with her


What do you mean he thinks someone is better than you? Because he makes a comment that someone who obviously works hard to get a certain physique is "epic"? He's with you aint he? If there were someone "better" that's where he'd be.


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## Aurelie (Apr 10, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> He should have said nothing, it's not like I asked for his opinion!
> :


Why can't he say anything? Are you going to be writing him some list on what he can and cannot say now? He made one comment about a model in a magazine and you have completely over reacted. A bit more time spent looking at the bigger picture and realising that this kind of thing is of no importance and you would most likely be a lot happier.

And before you put too much stock into the word epic, I would look ot up in the Urban Dictionary online.


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Aurelie said:


> Why can't he say anything? Are you going to be writing him some list on what he can and cannot say now? He made one comment about a model in a magazine and you have completely over reacted. A bit more time spent looking at the bigger picture and realising that this kind of thing is of no importance and you would most likely be a lot happier.
> 
> And before you put too much stock into the word epic, I would look ot up in the Urban Dictionary online.


I agree with this! I have been married for nearly 18 years to a man with serious foot-in-mouth disease! We went to the beach last weekend and he said "Rach, your cellulite looks really ugly!" I said "yeah, so does your beer belly!"  We just laughed about it in the end and I did agree that we BOTH need to get down that gym!

What is good for the goose is good for the gander! You need to raise your self-esteem!


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## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

Well I dont care if your muscles arent ripped Tink....you have a far better quality...

Your ability to keep threads going on page after page, causing many PFers to feel inadequate in your presence

Take his comment with a pinch of salt...he is just being a red blooded male:ihih:


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

I spent so long on your various threads Tink I missed the Royal baby coming out of the hospital!

I agree that you have an uncanny ability to keep threads alive and I have to admit some of the various replies give me a chuckle too!


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## Catz1 (Sep 19, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> To me epic means brilliant/awesome/the best of the best/better than x etc


That's your interpretation of the word but it doesn't mean you are right.

My OH uses epic when describing computer stuff and savage when talking about women, doesn't mean he loves me any less (well maybe a little less then his new monitor )


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## MCWillow (Aug 26, 2011)

Iheartcats said:


> I agree with this! I have been married for nearly 18 years to a man with serious foot-in-mouth disease! We went to the beach last weekend and he said* "Rach, your cellulite looks really ugly!*" I said "yeah, so does your beer belly!"  We just laughed about it in the end and I did agree that we BOTH need to get down that gym!
> 
> What is good for the goose is good for the gander! You need to raise your self-esteem!


Now _that_ I would have been upset about (good on you IHC for giving as good as you got!! :thumbup: )

D saying that model looked 'epic' wouldn't upset me - because she _does_ look awesome, and he isn't insulting _me_ by complimenting _her._


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

She does look 'epic'. Don't you think so? If you do why shouldn't anyone else including your boyfriend?


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## ginge2804 (Nov 5, 2011)

I think your over reacting.
Epic doesnt mean he thinks there good lucking, more that its cool.

My bf says other girls are hot, and it doesnt bother me, women look at other men!
And before you say it, I have incredably low self esteem and HATE my body.

Hes with you at the end of the day. If he wanted her, hed leave you.

ETA, I just showed my bf the pic and he didnt bat an eyelid :lol:


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Sleeping_Lion said:


> If you can't have an open, honest relationship with your partner, which includes expressing their opinions, is it worth being with them?


There was no need for him to give his opinion

It's not like I asked!


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There was no need for him to give his opinion


Opinions are like ar$eholes, everybody has one...


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There was no need for him to give his opinion
> 
> It's not like I asked!


Since when should someone be asked for an opinion? is he not allowed to speak his mind freely? she does look amazing, so what? you can appreciate the way someone looks without fancying them or wanting to jump into bed with them it's fine.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Aurelie said:


> Why can't he say anything? Are you going to be writing him some list on what he can and cannot say now? He made one comment about a model in a magazine and you have completely over reacted. A bit more time spent looking at the bigger picture and realising that this kind of thing is of no importance and you would most likely be a lot happier.
> 
> And before you put too much stock into the word epic, I would look ot up in the Urban Dictionary online.


I had no need or want to know that, he had no reason to tell me



Iheartcats said:


> I agree with this! I have been married for nearly 18 years to a man with serious foot-in-mouth disease! We went to the beach last weekend and he said "Rach, your cellulite looks really ugly!" I said "yeah, so does your beer belly!"  We just laughed about it in the end and I did agree that we BOTH need to get down that gym!
> 
> What is good for the goose is good for the gander! You need to raise your self-esteem!


See I can't do that because he has a good body!



havoc said:


> She does look 'epic'. Don't you think so? If you do why shouldn't anyone else including your boyfriend?


He didn't have to tell me! I didn't need to know!


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MissShelley said:


> Since when should someone be asked for an opinion? is he not allowed to speak his mind freely? she does look amazing, so what? you can appreciate the way someone looks without fancying them or wanting to jump into bed with them it's fine.


There was no reason for him to tell me, I did not want to know


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

Well in all honesty if my hubby looked at a pic like that and didn't say something positive I would be worried... after all he's is a healthy male just like if I saw a pic of a young good looking man he'd think I was full of BS if I didn't say something positive...doesn't take away from my love for him


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## sarelis (Aug 29, 2011)

Hun, people tell me s*** I don't want to know all the damn time! Smile and nod, ignore, tell them to shut up, stick your fingers in your ears and shout 'LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!' whatever it takes, just don't take it all to heart!


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## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

you are such a difficult, negative person sometimes, why not listen to what others are telling you? epic doesn't mean anything, it doesn't mean he wants her instead of you. maybe you should try just relaxing and being less controlling, if he didn't want to be with you he would of left, besides love is not about how someone looks physically it's about loving them for whats on the inside, anyone who says they haven't looked at someone else and though phwoar he/she is nice is lying, and there's nothing wrong with looking at a picture and thinking someone looks nice, it's a natural thing to do!


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

MissShelley said:


> Since when should someone be asked for an opinion? is he not allowed to speak his mind freely? she does look amazing, so what? you can appreciate the way someone looks without fancying them or wanting to jump into bed with them it's fine.


OP - This is what I can't get my head round. Why can't he speak his mind and say what he thinks and feels? If you don't like what he says then the problem lies with you.


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## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There was no need for him to give his opinion
> 
> *It's not like I asked*!


Maybe you didn't *ask*, but you *did *show him the picture.

I'd rather my O/H gave a reaction as it'd show me he's still 'alive' iyswim  No reaction at all would concern me more :lol: not that I'd be looking at pics like that in the first place. Christopher Meloni is more my cup of tea :ihih:


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There was no reason for him to tell me, I did not want to know


And how would he know that?

I seriously think you need to lighten up, how sad for him if he has to watch what he says all the time without fear of upsetting you.

If Jon or I got upset by the amount of times either of us has said "ooh he's nice" or "I like her" we'd of been long divorced by now.... I ain't perfect, certainly no oil painting, and certainly not stick thin lol but I am secure enough in our relationship to know that yep, he can look, comment an appreciate other women. How sad it would be if I didn't allow it, or he felt he couldn't express it.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

I am a firm believer that if you can't say anything nice say nothing. Have tried to be positive with you but to be blunt your negativity is getting me down' If its family or friends,or someone at work where I am paid to get the best from them then its worth battling on but I don't know you, its a forum and you seem determined to look on the dark side of everything.

Yes you are over reacting, if you as miserable with your bloke as you come across on here you are going to drive him away. We all have mega issues to deal with but that's life

In the words of Dragons Den - I'm out


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## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

Why did you show him that? What did you expect him to say? ew she's gross?

Don't show him pics if you don't want a reaction. 

My fella looks at other women, I know he does, as long as it's just pics he's looking at and not touching then it doesn't matter. 

I've gained alot of weight since being with my husband, he likes my old body better but as he says he loves me, body and everything and he wouldn't want to be with anyone else.

It's normal for men to see a nice looking girl and say "oft she's fit" or whatever but as long as they aren't acting on it, it really doesn't matter.


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

MissShelley said:


> And how would he know that?
> 
> I seriously think you need to lighten up, how sad for him if he has to watch what he says all the time without fear of upsetting you.
> 
> If Jon or I got upset by the amount of times either of us has said "ooh he's nice" or "I like her" we'd of been long divorced by now.... I ain't perfect, certainly no oil painting, and certainly not stick thin lol but I am secure enough in our relationship to know that yep, he can look, comment an appreciate other women. How sad it would be if I didn't allow it, or he felt he couldn't express it.


I agree with this too!! :thumbup1:

Why can't a man appreciate beauty be it an oil painting, photograph, water colour? I find other women sexy, alluring, beautiful but that doesn't make me a lesbian.


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## Aurelie (Apr 10, 2012)

Before I bow out of this farce too. You say you didn't want him to comment, yet looking at the link you posted, you were both looking at a website called 'girls with muscle'.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Iheartcats said:


> OP - This is what I can't get my head round. Why can't he speak his mind and say what he thinks and feels? If you don't like what he says then the problem lies with you.


Because it serves no purpose to tell me, I don't go around telling him if I think x y z guy is hot, if he asks I will say if he doesn't I won't



dougal22 said:


> Maybe you didn't *ask*, but you *did *show him the picture.
> 
> I'd rather my O/H gave a reaction as it'd show me he's still 'alive' iyswim  No reaction at all would concern me more :lol: not that I'd be looking at pics like that in the first place. Christopher Meloni is more my cup of tea :ihih:


We were looking at the thread, I didn't know the pic was in it

Even so, I didn't need to hear what he thought of her


----------



## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

I think the word epic sounds more like the word cool rather than hot or what not. 

Tink you need to believe in yourself more. All men and women look at others and may find them attractive, I know I look at some guys and think they're hot and I guess my OH does too with women. Honestly it's nothing, it's not like your OH is going to run off with her! I bet you that your OH has forgotten this woman and probs can't even remember calling her epic.


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## MoggyBaby (Mar 8, 2011)

Wow!!! 2 attention seeking threads in one day.

Someone is on a roll......


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

Actions speak louder than words.

He does your meals, he acts as your carer and he looks after you. What does that tell you???

Saying someone looks good means nothing.


----------



## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

Iheartcats said:


> I agree with this too!! :thumbup1:
> 
> Why can't a man appreciate beauty be it an oil painting, photograph, water colour? I find other women sexy, alluring, beautiful but that doesn't make me a lesbian.


Shelleys quite lucky in that my biggest crush of all is most likely Simon from Biffy Clyro...although i do have Nelly Furtado as the wallpaper on my phone...
:lol:


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Jesus I think you would be better with a blow up doll than a partner, he can't speak his mind, have an opinion, read a kindle...........................

Do you know what's worse Tink when they stop telling you things, when they stop having an opinion and stop wanting to be round you because they can't breath for fear of upsetting you.

I think you need to go and get yourself some professional help, because you are setting yourself along a path of self destruction and you need help to get off it, if your not going to help yourself...

You'll be A LOT more upset when your on your own..........


----------



## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Sounds like the OP is a control freak! As her OH cooks for her, he's not allowed to have an opinion on anything or speak his mind, they have no decent pots to cook healthy meals with, she can't eat certain fruit or vegetables but whines about being over-weight, she cut her OWN hair then moans about it having no style!

All these threads are just pointless and frustrating but like I said earlier they seem to run and run and I suspect the OP gets a certain amount of ego boost seeing how many replies she can get.


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

jon bda said:


> Shelleys quite lucky in that my biggest crush of all is most likely Simon from Biffy Clyro...although i do have Nelly Furtado as the wallpaper on my phone...
> :lol:


Oh your just a tart! don't forget whatshisgob from 30 seconds to Mars! 

Then there is Melanie Sykes and how could you forget Nigella! rrr:

That's ok, I have Mads Mikkelsen and the Winchester Brothers to occupy me


----------



## sarelis (Aug 29, 2011)

Meezey said:


> Jesus I think you would be better with a blow up doll than a partner, he can't speak his mind, have an opinion, read a kindle...........................
> 
> Do you know what's worse Tink when they stop telling you things, when they stop having an opinion and stop wanting to be round you because they can't breath for fear of upsetting you.
> 
> ...


Sounds harsh, but that's the truth of the matter. No-one wants to spend their whole life treading on eggshells.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MissShelley said:


> And how would he know that?
> 
> I seriously think you need to lighten up, how sad for him if he has to watch what he says all the time without fear of upsetting you.
> 
> If Jon or I got upset by the amount of times either of us has said "ooh he's nice" or "I like her" we'd of been long divorced by now.... I ain't perfect, certainly no oil painting, and certainly not stick thin lol but I am secure enough in our relationship to know that yep, he can look, comment an appreciate other women. How sad it would be if I didn't allow it, or he felt he couldn't express it.


He knows, we've been here before and I told him I know he's going to find others attractive but I dont want to know unless we are discussing it or I ask

As I said I don't do it with him so I would like the same back

I'm not his mate, I'm his gf, I don't need to hear who he finds hot, we aren't pals down the pub oogling girls

You might be comfortable with hearing who your husband finds attractive but I'm not comfortable with hearing who my OH finds attractive



Aurelie said:


> Before I bow out of this farce too. You say you didn't want him to comment, yet looking at the link you posted, you were both looking at a website called 'girls with muscle'.


No, it was a thread on a forum and someone posted the pic


----------



## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

Meezey said:


> Jesus I think you would be better with a blow up doll than a partner, he can't speak his mind, have an opinion, read a kindle...........................
> 
> Do you know what's worse Tink when they stop telling you things, when they stop having an opinion and stop wanting to be round you because they can't breath for fear of upsetting you.
> 
> ...


There's that saying though isn't there. Happy as a pig in s***
Some people could change their ways and mindset, but some choose not too.


----------



## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

Aurelie said:


> Before I bow out of this farce too. You say you didn't want him to comment, yet looking at the link you posted, you were both looking at a website called 'girls with muscle'.


Perhaps when she saw the muscle bit she thought they were talking about seafood.

Have too say Epic sounds just like what my other half would say when he isn't really listening because he is preoccupied and want too make me think he is listening.


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## MoggyBaby (Mar 8, 2011)

Meezey said:


> I think you need to go and get yourself some professional help, because you are setting yourself along a path of self destruction and you need help to get off it, if your not going to help yourself...
> 
> *You'll be A LOT more upset when your on your own........*..


Not half as upset as we will be when there is a 100 page thread on the subject! :sosp:


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> Actions speak louder than words.
> 
> He does your meals, he acts as your carer and he looks after you. What does that tell you???
> 
> Saying someone looks good means nothing.


Actually I need to be told he finds me attractive



Iheartcats said:


> Sounds like the OP is a control freak! As her OH cooks for her, he's not allowed to have an opinion on anything or speak his mind, they have no decent pots to cook healthy meals with, she can't eat certain fruit or vegetables but whines about being over-weight, she cut her OWN hair then moans about it having no style!
> 
> All these threads are just pointless and frustrating but like I said earlier they seem to run and run and I suspect the OP gets a certain amount of ego boost seeing how many replies she can get.


Wow, you are big on twisting things aren't you 

I never said he couldn't have an opinion I just don't need to hear ALL of his opinions! I'm his girlfriend not his ******* mate!

And cut my own hair? What?


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Why would you specifically *ask*? How immature!!! I seriously think Tinkerbell you need to grow up and move on.


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## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

I just showed my hubby and he said she has a nice body, she does! 

Anyway, 

I remember from other things you don't sleep with him, you consider looking at pics ect cheating blah blah, tie that in with you wont help yourself, your constant negative attitude, your controlling issues (no he cant share his opinion nor take his kindle out) and you will find yourself alone if you don't stop.

You're a partnership not a dictatorship. 

I feel for the poor guy, he can't do right no matter what. I've yet to see a thread where you aren't complaining about him.


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Actually I need to be told he finds me attractive
> 
> Wow, you are big on twisting things aren't you
> 
> ...


His hard work for your benefit doesn't tell you he wants to be with you?!?


----------



## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

The cutting hair thing. Well, yeah, maybe I did get my wires crossed. The pudding bowl thing. Hmmmm.

Why don't you need to hear his opinions. You live together don't you? Poor bloke I feel sorry for him.


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## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> He knows, we've been here before and I told him I know he's going to find others attractive but I dont want to know unless we are discussing it or I ask
> 
> As I said I don't do it with him so I would like the same back
> 
> ...


Being as you're clearly so upset about his 'adverse' reaction, you need to talk to him about this and explain clearly that, even if he does find someone attractive, he's not allowed to say that in front of you as you find it deeply distressing.

The fact of the matter is, you're actually talking to the wrong people about it. Most, if not all, of the people who've posted on here don't think there's anything wrong with what your B/F said, that his reaction was completely acceptable. But obviously it's not acceptable to you. So talk to him, let HIM know how YOU feel.

However, once you've 'gagged' him from making positive comments about other women, you can't then complain when he starts keeping things from you.


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## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

I shall be very upset if this thread dries up before it reaches 15 pages in true Tink fashion...
so more negativity and less sense would help the thread along nicely...thank you and that is allrrr:


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Iheartcats said:


> The cutting hair thing. Well, yeah, maybe I did get my wires crossed. The pudding bowl thing. Hmmmm.
> 
> Why don't you need to hear his opinions. You live together don't you? Poor bloke I feel sorry for him.


I don't need to hear who he finds attractive, what purpose does that serve?

And I did not cut my own hair lol


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> You might be comfortable with hearing who your husband finds attractive but I'm not comfortable with hearing who my OH finds attractive


Honestly my last words 

Be very careful what you wish for.

Moggybaby has met me maybe can verify whether I am mega ugly, a vile person whatever? Two major loves in my life both have talked the talk, both rather scrumptious looking blokes and super nice on the surface said all the right things. Both cheated big time - but they didn't find other women remotely attractive ..................... so they said and that's what matters isn't it


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

chichi said:


> I shall be very upset if this thread dries up before it reaches 15 pages in true Tink fashion...
> so more negativity and less sense would help the thread along nicely...thank you and that is allrrr:


I am already very upset that it has gone over my guess of 8 pages rrr:


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## Mulish (Feb 20, 2013)

MissShelley said:


> Oh your just a tart! don't forget whatshisgob from 30 seconds to Mars!
> 
> Then there is Melanie Sykes and how could you forget Nigella! rrr:
> 
> That's ok, I have Mads Mikkelsen and the Winchester Brothers to occupy me


You will have to content yourself with MM for now as the Winchester Brothers are currently occupying me :ihih:

OP, epic doesn't mean much. It's my son's favourite word right now and he uses it to express joy in everything from comfier socks to getting an extra fried egg one in a packet of Haribo. Not many of us could look like that even if we did have the time and motivation to try. I would love to know how she gets her hair to sit so smoothly, though.


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## sarelis (Aug 29, 2011)

Yeah, it's when they stop telling you things you need to worry....


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

DoodlesRule said:


> Honestly my last words
> 
> Be very careful what you wish for.
> 
> Moggybaby has met me maybe can verify whether I am mega ugly, a vile person whatever? Two major loves in my life both have talked the talk, both rather scrumptious looking blokes and super nice on the surface said all the right things. Both cheated big time - but they didn't find other women remotely attractive ..................... so they said and that's what matters isn't it


Sorry they both cheated


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

There is a different between moaning about your man and being disrespectful. I moan about my man constantly on here but I love him. He's a good man really despite his food in mouth disease. We have mutual respect and its ok if his opinions differ from mine. Such is life. Live and let live.


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

chichi said:


> I shall be very upset if this thread dries up before it reaches 15 pages in true Tink fashion...
> so more negativity and less sense would help the thread along nicely...thank you and that is allrrr:












I'm not a 'blonde' man but i do think it was the henna tattoos that did it...
:lol:


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## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

If you ask a man what he thinks about a pretty woman (or a pic of one) and expect him to say bleurgh then basically you are setting him up to fail , and thats totally unfair to your OH imo

Men like pretty women , Women like handsome men and we all like commenting on them , its just the way it goes

Edit : Id just be happy to have a bf to show the pic to , lol


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## delca1 (Oct 29, 2011)

MissShelley said:


> Oh your just a tart! don't forget whatshisgob from 30 seconds to Mars!
> 
> Then there is Melanie Sykes and how could you forget Nigella! rrr:
> 
> That's ok, I have Mads Mikkelsen and the Winchester Brothers to occupy me


This made me lol! (sorry Jon  )

To answer the original op question, yes I think you are over reacting. You don't like to look feminine (your words) yet you don't like it if your oh comments on someone who does, muscles or not.
Reading through this thread, and others from you, it seems to me as if you are 'testing' him all the time.
I don't care if my OH looks or comments about other people, the important thing is that we are together. You need to get a grip and stop giving him such a hard time or one day he might just decide that he's had enough.


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## poohdog (May 16, 2010)

She'd steam his pasta for him...


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

delca1 said:


> This made me lol! (sorry Jon  )


shush, i may be a bit of a tart but i'm hoping nobody notices...


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Sorry they both cheated


So was I lol. Crap judge of men, I went for lookers who said the right thing rather than doing the right thing


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

poohdog said:


> She'd steam his pasta for him...


See what them steroids do to you...look at her areola FFS!!!


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

poohdog said:


> She'd steam his pasta for him...


And crack walnuts between her thighs.


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

poohdog said:


> She'd steam his pasta for him...


That's too much muscle....


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## Goblin (Jun 21, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm not his mate, I'm his gf, I don't need to hear who he finds hot, we aren't pals down the pub oogling girls


My wife's my best mate as well


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm not his mate, I'm his gf.


I'm not saying any more on this thread after this comment because I find it all a bit sad, and disturbing really 

For me being with my OH is about being his girlfriend & being his best mate...

I want my OH to think of me as his mate because I am, and tell me EVERYTHING, even things I don't want to hear, you know the shitty stuff about his bunny boiler ex wife, things that make me cry they are that cruel... I'd rather he told me than bottle them all up or be afraid to tell me because I'll go off on one.

Grow up Tink, sort yourself out, stop feeling so bloody sorry for yourself, and if you want to stop feeling like this, go do something about it, if this upset you so much go and get some help to stop you feeling like this, to make you feel better about yourself and stuff that's going on.. Spitting it out on a forum, leaving yourself open to being ridiculed by people, why would you do that to yourself? Speak yo your partner about it, and how it makes you feel.. Again this is about you not him 

I know that sounds harsh but I find this thread really sad...


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## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

I think his comment was maybe getting OP back for naming her saucepan Carl.....perhaps he couldnt stand sharing the kitchen with another male ... resulting in Carls demise....call me Miss Marples:sneaky2:


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

Yes guys are turned off by fat, ugly or smelly women. 

But far more so by moaning and whining women who are never happy. They RUN a mile!

Take note OP!

You sound like you have far too much time on your hands to think and make yourself unhappy. Find a good cause/charity to help and turn those negative feelings into positive ones. Endorphines released from feeling you have done something worth while, will make the world look rosier and at the same time build yourself esteem (and help a good cause).


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## MoggyBaby (Mar 8, 2011)

DoodlesRule said:


> Honestly my last words
> 
> Be very careful what you wish for.
> 
> *Moggybaby has met me maybe can verify whether I am mega ugly, a vile person whatever? * Two major loves in my life both have talked the talk, both rather scrumptious looking blokes and super nice on the surface said all the right things. Both cheated big time - but they didn't find other women remotely attractive ..................... so they said and that's what matters isn't it


She's goigeous!!!!!!!! :yesnod: A right biatch (why else would I be chums wiv her???? :lol but totes goigeous!!!!!!

Ok, she's not REALLY a biatch....... 



jon bda said:


> shush, i may be a bit of a tart but i'm hoping nobody notices...


 Trust me Jon, we've noticed........... :w00t: :001_tt2: :lol:

.


----------



## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

MaryBella said:


> *Yes guys are turned off by fat, ugly or smelly women. *
> 
> But far more so by moaning and whining women who are never happy. They RUN a mile!
> 
> ...


Not true. Lots of men are very attracted to the kind of women you've described above. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Some people are even turned on by body odour too. Not me I hasten to add. I prefer to smell of Jo Malone after my daily shower


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

MoggyBaby said:


> She's goigeous!!!!!!!! :yesnod: A right biatch (why else would I be chums wiv her???? :lol but totes goigeous!!!!!!
> 
> Ok, she's not REALLY a biatch.......
> 
> ...


lOL You daft bat am nothing special but not 3 bad for edging onto an oldie - so like most of us NORMAL!!

Mrs Moggy on the other hand everybody is fun and chatty and rather lovely to look at too (and no my poor men choices have not turned me into a lady lover )


----------



## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

dougal22 said:


> Not true. Lots of men are very attracted to the kind of women you've described above. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
> 
> Some people are even turned on by body odour too. Not me I hasten to add. I prefer to smell of Jo Malone after my daily shower


I thought beauty was in the eye of the beerholder.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Mese said:


> If you ask a man what he thinks about a pretty woman (or a pic of one) and expect him to say bleurgh then basically you are setting him up to fail , and thats totally unfair to your OH imo
> 
> Men like pretty women , Women like handsome men and we all like commenting on them , its just the way it goes
> 
> Edit : Id just be happy to have a bf to show the pic to , lol


I didn't ask him


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## MoggyBaby (Mar 8, 2011)

DoodlesRule said:


> lOL You daft bat am nothing special but not 3 bad for edging onto an oldie - so like most of us NORMAL!!


Ya is goigeous!!! Just lap it up girl ok!



> Mrs Moggy on the other hand everybody is fun and chatty and rather lovely to look at too (and no my poor men choices have not turned me into a lady lover )


I would like to advise everyone that it was a very bright sunny day & Doodles had left her sunnies in the car. As such, she was blinded by the light and totally incapable of seeing 3cm's in front of her mush!!!! :lol: :lol:

I did talk a lot - poor girl was blind AND deaf by the time I got her back to her car!!!! :lol: :lol:


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## ginge2804 (Nov 5, 2011)

Meezey said:


> I'm not saying any more on this thread after this comment because I find it all a bit sad, and disturbing really
> 
> For me being with my OH is about being his girlfriend & being his best mate...
> 
> ...


This is what I think!!
My bf is my best friend, I tell him everything, and id hope he would with me too.
I would HATE to think he felt like he had to watch what he says around me!
We have banter with each other, take the mic out each other, but we both know we love each other!

I would be truly lost without my bf, and I find it sad that you would rather he keep quite, and that you don't consider each other friends! Especially after he does so much for you!


----------



## poohdog (May 16, 2010)

canuckjill said:


> That's too much muscle....


Can't beat these Canadian women eh?


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

MoggyBaby said:


> Ya is goigeous!!! Just lap it up girl ok!
> 
> I would like to advise everyone that it was a very bright sunny day & Doodles had left her sunnies in the car. As such, she was blinded by the light and totally incapable of seeing 3cm's in front of her mush!!!! :lol: :lol:
> 
> I did talk a lot - poor girl was blind AND deaf by the time I got her back to her car!!!! :lol: :lol:


She proper clever too knows about art and artists and stuff (proper pictures that are nice not unmade beds and weird things like that) whereas I have just photos of my dog and my son on my walls - I think she tolerates me cus I like the Proclaimers


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

Seriously Tink, if you spent just an inkling of the time that woman spends working on her bod, *which is her profession,* working on your own self esteem issues, we wouldn't be having this discussion.

I would suggest working on the inside before taking up lifting weights.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

ginge2804 said:


> This is what I think!!
> My bf is my best friend, I tell him everything, and id hope he would with me too.
> I would HATE to think he felt like he had to watch what he says around me!
> We have banter with each other, take the mic out each other, but we both know we love each other!
> ...


What I mean by mates is, I'm not one of the lads down the pub, you know the people you usually have that kind of banter with

I would never dream of picking up one of his insecurities an complimenting another man on it, such as, he's insecure about his thinned hair so I would never dream of mentioning someone's full head of hair, he doesn't need to hear that!



Toby Tyler said:


> Seriously Tink, if you spent just an inkling of the time that woman spends working on her bod, *which is her profession,* working on your own self esteem issues, we wouldn't be having this discussion.
> 
> I would suggest working on the inside before taking up lifting weights.


Well I have forever then since I will never lift weights again


----------



## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

God this thread is boring. So what if he finds her attractive!? Most guys would.


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

Am I allowed to write" Yes as usual"?


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

This thread is sad and funny all at the same time.

Tinks I don't know you other than the fact you don't cook with a saucepan (very strange) and you don't' let you OH take a kindle to his parents house etc. 

What it seems like is you have come onto this forum hoping to find like minded people and unfortunately you didn't. I don't know a single place where you would.

You may have issues with your body - so do many of us - but you have to learn to make the best of a bad job otherwise your life will only get sadder. And the more you try to control your OH the further you will push him away. 

If my hubby only expected me to talk when I was asked etc I would be out of there. That's not love, that's control. ANd it's wrong. 

If you don't want to hear what her thinks then you can't love him fully. Even if what he has to say is bad, if you love him fully, you will accept it.

I find it sad that you can't see what you are doing. How overly controlling you are being, and that ultimately you will lose him. Or he will stay with you, keep his mouth shut but shag others on the side. That's how life works. 

Treat others as you would want to be treated. With respect. If you don't want him to speak don't share threads with him. If all you have him for really is to be your carer then pay him and let him free from romantic obligations as you don;t seem to love him properly.


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

My BF who is also my best friend!!! would feel very comfortable telling me who he found attractive and we have some good banter about "would i if i was gay" its funny. I can not believe that by showing him a picture you didnt expect any reaction at all. Enjoy life with your partner and by the sounds of it lighten up a bit. Otherwise youll lose him. Its time to GET A GRIP!!


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## welshjet (Mar 31, 2011)

Well, I just showed the pic to my OH and said what do you think of her, so for me I did ask him so was aware that there would be a response, so here we go

1, too skinny 
2 too many veins especially the ones going down the front part of her hip
3 prefers natural wiggling puppies  and not silicone valley on display

Anyhow in case your wondering, but perhaps not, here is my partners fantasy



















And with no airbrushing


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

spid said:


> .
> 
> Treat others as you would want to be treated.


I do! Which is why I would never dream of pointing out how lovely x persons hair is knowing full well he's insecure about his own!


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> My BF who is also my best friend!!! would feel very comfortable telling me who he found attractive and we have some good banter about "would i if i was gay" its funny. I can not believe that by showing him a picture you didnt expect any reaction at all. Enjoy life with your partner and by the sounds of it lighten up a bit. Otherwise youll lose him. Its time to GET A GRIP!!


Do you honestly make a comment about every person you see in a picture?


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

welshjet said:


> Well, I just showed the pic to my OH and said what do you think of her, so for me I did ask him so was aware that there would be a response, so here we go
> 
> 1, too skinny
> 2 too many veins especially the ones going down the front part of her hip
> ...


Katy perry/zoey deschanel are my OHs real crushes


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Do you honestly make a comment about every person you see in a picture?


No not at all but if i was to show him a picture i wouldnt expect him to sit there and be mute. Honestly...............:Yawn:


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> No not at all but if i was to show him a picture i wouldnt expect him to sit there and be mute. Honestly...............:Yawn:


Again I didn't show him, the picture was in a tread, I didn't know it was in the thread!


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

No I don't mean like that - that's just picking at smallnesses. He didn't tell you you weren't like it and should be. All he said was epic. That could have meant (to him not your interpretation) that he was impressed with the effort she had put in to get those muscles. You are reading so much into one small word. And have spent the last hour or so away form spending time with your OH to moan about him. And despite having a 100% consensus that yes you were over reacting you still feel the need to justify yourself.

I mean allowing another person to be themselves. To allow them selves to express themselves in a way they are comfortable with. To stop nit picking at aspects of their personality - it's actually worse than talking about thinning hair. To stop making everything about yourself and not about him. That's respect. To understand what a man is like and allowing him to be like that without getting a monk on! 

For f***S sake - it was ONE word. ANd you made a 13 page thread out of it! How about TALKINg to your OH and explaining how you feel and then letting him say he feels about you censuring him all the time. Show him this thread and see what he says.


----------



## ginge2804 (Nov 5, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> What I mean by mates is, I'm not one of the lads down the pub, you know the people you usually have that kind of banter with


Well maybe thats why I have a different view to you then, as I regularly go to the pub with him and his mates. Im classed as one of the lads to them, so I DO have this kind of banter with them all.


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Katy perry/zoey deschanel are my OHs real crushes


Please dont show him this:

Godness know what will happen if he comments!!


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Again I didn't show him, the picture was in a tread, I didn't know it was in the thread!


So he cant comment unless he's asked lol!!


----------



## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

spid said:


> No I don't mean like that - that's just picking at smallnesses. He didn't tell you you weren't like it and should be. All he said was epic. That could have meant (to him not your interpretation) that he was impressed with the effort she had put in to get those muscles. You are reading so much into one small word. And have spent the last hour or so away form spending time with your OH to moan about him. And despite having a 100% consensus that yes you were over reacting you still feel the need to justify yourself.
> 
> I mean allowing another person to be themselves. To allow them selves to express themselves in a way they are comfortable with. To stop nit picking at aspects of their personality - it's actually worse than talking about thinning hair. To stop making everything about yourself and not about him. That's respect. To understand what a man is like and allowing him to be like that without getting a monk on!
> 
> For f***S sake - it was ONE word. ANd you made a 13 page thread out of it! How about TALKINg to your OH and explaining how you feel and then letting him say he feels about you censuring him all the time. Show him this thread and see what he says.


I am with spid, show him this thread if you want a TRUE opinion. 

Or just maybe this boyfriend is imaginary!


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

spid said:


> No I don't mean like that - that's just picking at smallnesses. He didn't tell you you weren't like it and should be. All he said was epic. That could have meant (to him not your interpretation) that he was impressed with the effort she had put in to get those muscles. You are reading so much into one small word. And have spent the last hour or so away form spending time with your OH to moan about him. And despite having a 100% consensus that yes you were over reacting you still feel the need to justify yourself.
> 
> I mean allowing another person to be themselves. To allow them selves to express themselves in a way they are comfortable with. To stop nit picking at aspects of their personality - it's actually worse than talking about thinning hair. To stop making everything about yourself and not about him. That's respect. To understand what a man is like and allowing him to be like that without getting a monk on!
> 
> For f***S sake - it was ONE word. ANd you made a 13 page thread out of it! How about TALKINg to your OH and explaining how you feel and then letting him say he feels about you censuring him all the time. Show him this thread and see what he says.


I'm sick of this he's a man he should be able to do what he wants and make you feel like **** crap! You may as well say he's a man, let him go cheat cause its what men do!



ginge2804 said:


> Well maybe thats why I have a different view to you then, as I regularly go to the pub with him and his mates. Im classed as one of the lads to them, so I DO have this kind of banter with them all.


Fair enough



button50 said:


> Please dont show him this:
> 
> Godness know what will happen if he comments!!


We've already seen that


----------



## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

I have to ask ...... sorry i don't mean to be offensive ...... just a question ...

Tinks are you happy with your sexuality ? You say you don't want to be femminine , and that your a tomboy , in the next breath you say say your not a tomboy , who doesn't mix with the boys down the pub  you have your hair cut as not to look femminine , you don't like your body that's fine most women don't but we deal with it ......... Everything is to much trouble for you , i know you have some disabilities , but you are making your problems 1000 fold by not helping yourself ..... 

I also have to ask do you want to help yourself ??????? 

Do you know what else i have noticed , you never have a good word for your man , the only time you mention him , is when he is not doing as he is told  or when he fails to give you the answers you want .... He's with with you for gods sake give him some credit , at least for his patience .... Why can't/don't you make some effort for him , make him feel worthwhile , and more importantly loved ....... Relationships are a two way thing , give and take , good , bad and ugly , even stevens .... I feel sad for you Tinks , but i feel so ,so sorry for your henpecked man ...... It's not all about you love


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> We've already seen that


Was it EPIC??


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

button50 said:


> Was it EPIC??


HaHahaaaaahaaaaaaaa


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

tincan said:


> I have to ask ...... sorry i don't mean to be offensive ...... just a question ...
> 
> Tinks are you happy with your sexuality ? You say you don't want to be femminine , and that your a tomboy , in the next breath you say say your not a tomboy , who doesn't mix with the boys down the pub  you have your hair cut as not to look femminine , you don't like your body that's fine most women don't but we deal with it ......... Everything is to much trouble for you , i know you have some disabilities , but you are making your problems 1000 fold by not helping yourself .....
> 
> ...


You think I'm the bad guy but you don't know what's happened in the years weve been together, HE has made me like this because of the things he's done (and no i won't go into it) I was never insecure before I got with him

I admit its become worse since my disability and the realisation I will never get the physique I want because will never life weights again



button50 said:


> Was it EPIC??


I don't know, he hasn't used that word till today


----------



## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

You are the one that allows your self to take his comment to mean that he wants you to feel like crap. You. Not him.

All he did was say one word.

And yes, if thinking and even saying that other women look good is that hard on you that you have to control him that much then you are better off without him, so he can't 'hurt' you all the time. Seem the poor boy can do nothing right. He isn;t allowed to be a man because you will be hurt.

I've been with my OH for 23 years. We are both allowed to look and even drool if necessary (often necessary in the case of a few actors). Shhhh - We even sometimes watch porn together - but don't tell Mr Cameron. I don't worry about the thin girls with massive plastic tits and he doesn't worry about the mens 12 inch schlongs! I'm not having a go at him nor he me. 

As long as he doesn't touch all is well with the world. He doesn't undermine me with this, he's just being human. By not allowing your OH to express himself and saying he can't be like a man you are not allowing him to be a proper human.

He will eventually leave you either completely by walking out the door, or by cheating on you - but don't worry he won't tell you unless you specifically ask him. And of course that's what important.  That fact that he will think these things because he is a human male doesn't matter as long as he hides it from you. What a healthy relationship you have! 

Good luck lassie - you bloody need it.


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

Awwww Tink I think you are EPIC.................... :sneaky2: EPICALLY controlling and in need of serious help!


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

spid said:


> You are the one that allows your self to take his comment to mean that he wants you to feel like crap. You. Not him.
> 
> All he did was say one word.
> 
> ...


Not allowed to be a man, get a ******* grip 

That's like saying you aren't a woman unless you go clothes/shoe shopping every week


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Maybe he meant 'epic' in the sense of a really long poem, like Beowulf.........


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## 3dogs2cats (Aug 15, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> You think I'm the bad guy but you don't know what's happened in the years weve been together, HE has made me like this because of the things he's done (and no i won't go into it) I was never insecure before I got with hi


Tink, if you believe he has made you insecure by his past behaviour, then is he really someone you wish to be with?


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Not allowed to be a man, get a ******* grip
> 
> That's like saying you aren't a woman unless you go clothes/shoe shopping every week


It's what you said - if you allowed him to be like a man that he would shag everything in sight (effectively - a little literary paraphrasing).

I own less shoes and clothes than my hubby, only 2 handbags (and that's because people give them to me faster than I can give them away again) I consider myself a tomboy but I have long hair and like to wear nice clothes - I just have very few of them. Am I less of a woman for all of that? No. Is a man less of a man if he keeps his wong in his trousers - of course not. Is he a man if his eyes stray? Yes he is. He's just a prick if he follows through.

The more you try to rein him in, the more he will disappoint you.

If you love them let them go, if they love you they come straight back.

You are the one that needs to get a grip lassie. You are chasing your man away and you don't see it. How many people have commented on this thread now? Has a single one said you were right? On this forum, that's actually highly unusual. SO that says a lot.

I'm going to have to go with everyone else and say that there is a deal of attention seeking in these weird threads. I look forward with anticipation to the next one.


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> You think I'm the bad guy but you don't know what's happened in the years weve been together, HE has made me like this because of the things he's done (and no i won't go into it) I was never insecure before I got with him


If he has made you this way and your not happy about it then why oh why are you still with him?????


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I admit its become worse since my disability and the realisation I will never get the physique I want because will never life weights again


I agree you having phyisical restrictions mean you will never be able to weight train. But sensible eating (healthy choices) and walking can give you a very trim and attractive body. And the endorphines' you get from a nice gentle walk in the sunshine will give you a more positive attitude to the world, rather than this negative one you have.

I know about these things. 

And look at this guy, take inspiration from Kurt Yaegar he lost a leg, but still got back on his bike:

Rudimental - Waiting All Night feat. Ella Eyre (Official Video) - OUT NOW - YouTube


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

spid said:


> It's what you said - if you allowed him to be like a man that he would shag everything in sight (effectively - a little literary paraphrasing).
> 
> I own less shoes and clothes than my hubby, only 2 handbags (and that's because people give them to me faster than I can give them away again) I consider myself a tomboy but I have long hair and like to wear nice clothes - I just have very few of them. Am I less of a woman for all of that? No. Is a man less of a man if he keeps his wong in his trousers - of course not. Is he a man if his eyes stray? Yes he is. He's just a prick if he follows through.
> 
> ...


We did break up a few weeks ago, he was the one that did all the chasing to get back together


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MaryBella said:


> I agree you having phyisical restrictions mean you will never be able to weight train. But sensible eating (healthy choices) and walking can give you a very trim and attractive body. And the endorphines' you get from a nice gentle walk in the sunshine will give you a more positive attitude to the world, rather than this negative one you have.
> 
> I know about these things.
> 
> ...


I can't even walk most days

I am trying to eat healthier though


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## fierceabby (May 16, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


Answer: 
No. That girl probably owns saucepans, doesn't live on take aways and ready meals that are known to be full of salt and sugar. If you are unhappy with the way you are, change the things you do. i.e- eat properly with good wholesome ingredients eould be a good start. 
You seem so unhappy with your OH all you ever do is slag him down on here, I would be surprised if he didn't look elsewhere to be honest.


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> We did break up a few weeks ago, he was the one that did all the chasing to get back together


What does that tell you then????

I honestly dont understand


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

fierceabby said:


> Answer:
> No. That girl probably owns saucepans, doesn't live on take aways and ready meals that are known to be full of salt and sugar. If you are unhappy with the way you are, change the things you do. i.e- eat properly with good wholesome ingredients eould be a good start.
> You seem so unhappy with your OH all you ever do is slag him down on here, I would be surprised if he didn't look elsewhere to be honest.




.........


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I can't even walk most days
> 
> I am trying to eat healthier though


One of my friands is a paralympian and can not walk but still manages to stay fit and healthy along with alot of people whos suffer from a disability. Its a state of mind if you want something to happen then your the only person that can do it!

Instead of "trying to eat healthy" if it bothers you so much then just "eat healthy"


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> What does that tell you then????
> 
> I honestly dont understand


That he wants to be with me

But then why does he make comments that he knows will upset me

Before you say anything surely no one should be continually doing things that upset their partner surely?

You (general) go on about respect but he's hardly respecting me by saying things he knows will upset me


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

if he is so awful to you then why did you get back together with him?

_Posted from Petforums.co.uk App for Android_


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> One of my friands is a paralympian and can not walk but still manages to stay fit and healthy along with alot of people whos suffer from a disability. Its a state of mind if you want something to happen then your the only person that can do it!
> 
> Instead of "trying to eat healthy" if it bothers you so much then just "eat healthy"


I am, I am making changes!


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> We did break up a few weeks ago, he was the one that did all the chasing to get back together


Do you actually do anything nice for him to make him feel loved and appreciated? You've said he's your carer? what is in it for him? never mind your needs, think about how he's feeling.


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I am, I am making changes!


You have to change your mindset before you can do anything else.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MissShelley said:


> Do you actually do anything nice for him to make him feel loved and appreciated? You've said he's your carer? what is in it for him? never mind your needs, think about how he's feeling.


I do plenty for him which i won't go into as they are private things


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MissShelley said:


> You have to change your mindset before you can do anything else.


I don't have to change my mind set to be healthy


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> That he wants to be with me
> 
> But then why does he make comments that he knows will upset me
> 
> ...


Yes it does seem that for some reason he does want to be with you. However you dont seem that you are happy in the relationship so why prolong it. No one can change this other than you!


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Yes it does seem that for some reason he does want to be with you. However you dont seem that you are happy in the relationship so why prolong it. No one can change this other than you!


I've changed a lot for him, I don't see why he can't change one thing for me


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## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

Wow, if that's the worst (best?  ) he sees of women on the Internet, you're pretty lucky!


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I do plenty for him which i won't go into as they are private things


Right, but do you make him feel appreciated?



tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I don't have to change my mind set to be healthy


With all the will in the world you will get nowhere when you come across with such a negative attitude.

All people have ever done is help and give advice when you have asked for it, and all you do is look for reasons as to why you can't take the advice.


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## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I've changed a lot for him, I don't see why he can't change one thing for me


Why did you change for him you go into a relationship ready to accept things that you may not like about the other person. I would never make my OH change the same way i would not change anything about me. To me im sorry to say seems like a doomed realationship.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Why did you change for him you go into a relationship ready to accept things that you may not like about the other person. I would never make my OH change the same way i would not change anything about me. To me im sorry to say seems like a doomed realationship.


A doomed one that's lasted 12 years so far

There may be things I don't like about the other person but there are also things I won't put up with

I made it clear early on that I wouldn't take kindly to comments made to be about other girls and he still got with me


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> A doomed one that's lasted 12 years so far
> 
> There may be things I don't like about the other person but there are also things I won't put up with
> 
> I made it clear early on that I wouldn't take kindly to comments made to be about other girls and he still got with me


Have you been this negative for 12 years?

Ive given you advice and i think you are either gonna have to stop being so bothered by his comments or get rid.

I have been with my OH for 7 years and i am so glad i dont feel the need to be so negative about him.

Lifes too short!


----------



## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> A doomed one that's lasted 12 years so far
> 
> There may be things I don't like about the other person but there are also things I won't put up with
> 
> I made it clear early on that I wouldn't take kindly to comments made to be about other girls and he still got with me


So what you going to do about it then? you can't keep going around in circles.

It's one thing coming here and having a bitch, but what constructive steps can YOU take to change what you don't like. It has to come from you and no one else.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Have you been this negative for 12 years?
> 
> Ive given you advice and i think you are either gonna have to stop being so bothered by his comments or get rid.
> 
> ...


Or try and make him see hoe much it's upsetting me

Tbh I think he was shocked at how upset I got


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Or try and make him see hoe much it's upsetting me
> 
> Tbh I think he was shocked at how upset I got


Well looks like youve answered your own question then.

Im shocked at how upset you got from an image!!


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## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

Did you even speak to him before you came on here? Your question was "am I overreacting?" Yes.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Well looks like youve answered your own question then.
> 
> Im shocked at how upset you got from an image!!


Yes well I did

To be honest I don't think I would ever be happy with him commenting on other females as I just don't think it's something you say to a partner unless both are comfortable with it


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

astro2011 said:


> Did you even speak to him before you came on here? Your question was "am I overreacting?" Yes.


Yes before and after


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

This thread is epic

Now I'm going to wash the colour out of my hair, just hope it hasn't gone orange


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Or try and make him see hoe much it's upsetting me
> 
> Tbh I think he was shocked at how upset I got


I am sorry, but if I was your boyfriend I would be running a mile! You SCARE me. 

I have seen alot of your posts on the Martin Lewis forums also, I have just put two and two together. Small world eh?


----------



## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

What did he say?


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

JeanGenie said:


> This thread is epic
> 
> Now I'm going to wash the colour out of my hair, just hope it hasn't gone orange


Shouldn't of left it in so long while you read this whole thread!!!
:lol:


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Yes before and after


And his response was...............

Did he say you were over reacting?


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## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

astro2011 said:


> What did he say?


Eh? ya reckon she actually listened to the poor man inbetween her histrionics.


----------



## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

MaryBella said:


> I am sorry, but if I was your boyfriend I would be running a mile! You SCARE me.
> 
> I have seen alot of your posts on the Martin Lewis forums also, I have just put two and two together. Small world eh?


Cosmo forums?
:lol:


----------



## xgemma86x (Feb 13, 2009)

Tbf if my bf said someone like that was epic,especially if he knew how insecure I felt about my own body then I wouldn't be too happy either.


----------



## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Or try and make him see hoe much it's upsetting me
> 
> Tbh I think he was shocked at how upset I got


well you got the result you wanted yet again Tinks ........ Now lady how insecure are you making your partner feel ...... control; over emotions / feelings , never ever a good thing  ..... why can't you stop laying your hang-ups on your partner ? He does'nt cause your misery you are the master of your own destiny ...... you choose to live in that misery bubble ....

you call him the OP ffs , he's a human being  he feels to you know , and despite what he has or has not done does he deserve to be in eternal hell ..... and why did he come back , i dread to think what was said to this poor guy ..... we are only getting your side of the relationship here not his , poor bloke does not stand a chance .... FGS come on woman


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

MissShelley said:


> Eh? ya reckon she actually listened to the poor man inbetween her histrionics.


That is if there really is a boyfriend 

If he does exist, the benefits agency may want to get a tip off (going by her posts on Martin Lewis forum).


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## Guest (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> tinktinktinkerbell wrote:
> 
> i class cheating as
> 
> ...


And thats what, five years old? Nice to see your moving on...


----------



## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

jon bda said:


> Cosmo forums?
> :lol:


Yeah, there to!

I have just googled her username and also in google images (loads of different pics of her different hair styles, seems to her fav thread topic besides moaning about the imaginary BF pmsl)...oooffft this woman is on every forum known to man. I am surprised she has the time to even talk to her boyfriend. She must have 20 threads going at any one time on the internet ha ha.

Personally I think she is just a really lonely gal, and the boyfriend she is always moaning about doesn't exist.


----------



## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

MaryBella said:


> Yeah, there to!
> 
> I have just googled her username and also in google images (loads of different pics of her different hair styles, seems to her fav thread topic besides moaning about the imaginary BF pmsl)...oooffft this woman is on every forum known to man. I am surprised she has the time to even talk to her boyfriend. She must have 20 threads going at any one time on the internet ha ha.
> 
> Personally I think she is just a really lonely gal, and the boyfriend she is always moaning about doesn't exist.


Whilst i agree with what your saying MB ( not you moggs) lets keep , stuff in here  and from here , we all know how to use the googlebox ..... and most of us know how Tinks posts


----------



## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tincan said:


> Whilst i agree with what your saying MB ( not you moggs) lets keep , stuff in here  and from here , we all know how to use the googlebox ..... and most of us know how Tinks posts


Sorry, I just joined tonight so this is all a bit of a novalty for me :bored:


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## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

MaryBella said:


> Yeah, there to!
> 
> I have just googled her username and also in google images (loads of different pics of her different hair styles, seems to her fav thread topic besides moaning about the imaginary BF pmsl)...oooffft this woman is on every forum known to man. I am surprised she has the time to even talk to her boyfriend. She must have 20 threads going at any one time on the internet ha ha.
> 
> Personally I think she is just a really lonely gal, and the boyfriend she is always moaning about doesn't exist.


As a newbie ..you do seem to be very interested in Tinks ..


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

MaryBella said:


> Yeah, there to!
> 
> I have just googled her username and also in google images (loads of different pics of her different hair styles, seems to her fav thread topic besides moaning about the imaginary BF pmsl)...oooffft this woman is on every forum known to man. I am surprised she has the time to even talk to her boyfriend. She must have 20 threads going at any one time on the internet ha ha.
> 
> Personally I think she is just a really lonely gal, and the boyfriend she is always moaning about doesn't exist.


Can you hear that noise ?????? Its the sound of no one giving a fcuk....new member suddenly reveals member secrets...oh come on, this was done to death months ago.....I'd rather read about Kate and wills :Yawn:


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

paddyjulie said:


> As a newbie ..you do seem to be very interested in Tinks ..


as a newbie the only threads I have seen her post in are tinks


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

paddyjulie said:


> As a newbie ..you do seem to be very interested in Tinks ..


Person from MLF I used to use


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## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

redroses2106 said:


> as a newbie the only threads I have seen her post in are tinks


Seagulls


----------



## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Person from MLF I used to use


What's MLF?


----------



## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

jon bda said:


> i class cheating as
> 
> sex
> oral
> ...


Wait, what about spooning? :w00t:

And is the question "Am I over reacting" or "Am I over reaching"?

I do agree he should not be complimenting other girls in pubs in your presence or exchanging phone numbers in order to hook up. But do you actually have a written list of things he can't do?


----------



## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

paddyjulie said:


> As a newbie ..you do seem to be very interested in Tinks ..


It is actually because her two threads have been top of the pile all night.

I joined to post a link to animal cruelty on FB and appealed for all your help. My thread has been ignored, so just joined in on the two threads that seem to be hogging all the animal lovers attention. ooopsss


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

paddyjulie said:


> What's MLF?


Martin Lewis forum


----------



## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Person from MLF I used to use


You admit to using people? Yikes!


----------



## MCWillow (Aug 26, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm sick of this he's a man he should be able to do what he wants and make you feel like **** crap! You may as well say he's a man, let him go cheat cause its what men do!


No-one is saying thats what men do (or women for that matter).

If he makes you feel like crap by doing something, you need to TELL him. If you dont tell him he wont know.

D has made me feel like crap before, and I've told him why - he doesn't do whatever it was anymore. He might do it secretly or with his mates - but to be honest if he's out with his mates and wants to act like a 'lad' and comment on some girl walking past - good luck to him, and lets hope she won't lamp him one (although he would deserve it!) - he just knows that I'm _not_ one of the lads and wouldnt do it when I am there.

He did that at my 40th birthday party - a young girl (in her 20's, young to me!) in tiny denim shorts, flowing long blonde hair - my son and his friend commented and D thought he would join in 

I just looked at him and asked him if he realised how stupid he looked. I then said 'if thats what you want, its isn't me, but go for it, just dont make _me_ look like an idiot by standing next to you while you try your luck' - he was more than embarrassed, apologised and said he got carried away because Jake and Josh were making comments (he had had a drink, in fairness to him) - 'Jake and Josh are 19 years old babe, you're over 50' - he hasn't done it since :lol:



tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Not allowed to be a man, get a ******* grip
> 
> That's like saying you aren't a woman unless you go clothes/shoe shopping every week


No - its saying men will look at a good body or pretty face and appreciate it. D loves Angelina Jolie (especially in the Lara Croft movies). Doesn't mean he loves me any less or thinks I am ugly!

Just like I think Johnny Depp is beyond gorgeous (I even have a Johnny Depp postcard on the fridge) - doesn't mean I would just saunter off with Johnny Depp if he offered (self control  ) - because I _love_ D - and thats the difference.



tinktinktinkerbell said:


> That he wants to be with me
> 
> But then why does he make comments that he knows will upset me
> 
> ...


 If he is continually making comment the he knows will upset you, then maybe you have to ask him why.

If I told D something upset me, and then he continued to do it, I would be questioning what he actually felt for me. No-one _wants _to hurt someone they love.


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

MaryBella said:


> It is actually because her two threads have been top of the pile all night.
> 
> I joined to post a link to animal cruelty on FB and appealed for all your help. My thread has been ignored, so just joined in on the two threads that seem to be hogging all the animal lovers attention. ooopsss


You overlooked... Dog chat...cat chat...bird chat...fish chat...rodents...rabbits and every thing with fur, wings , fins or four legs...on the site...pull the other one


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

Lavenderb said:


> You overlooked... Dog chat...cat chat...bird chat...fish chat...rodents...rabbits and every thing with fur, wings , fins or four legs...on the site...pull the other one


I actually posted in Bird Chat two hours ago, same time when I posted in General. Don't turn this manaic thread into a MaryBella witch hunt ha ha .


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MCWillow said:


> No-one is saying thats what men do (or women for that matter).
> 
> If he makes you feel like crap by doing something, you need to TELL him. If you dont tell him he wont know.
> 
> ...


It's not so much he finds others attractive its just that he comments

And yes I do question what he feels for me sometimes

He says he just didnt think it would upset me


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## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> It's not so much he finds others attractive its just that he comments
> 
> And yes I do question what he feels for me sometimes
> 
> He says he just didnt think it would upset me


Tink, do yourself a favour and stop worrying. Go and grab a copy of 'men are from mars, women are from Venus' and you might find you have a better understanding of the males side of things.


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## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

MaryBella said:


> It is actually because her two threads have been top of the pile all night.
> 
> I joined to post a link to animal cruelty on FB and appealed for all your help. My thread has been ignored, so just joined in on the two threads that seem to be hogging all the animal lovers attention. ooopsss


To be fair ..the majority of the posts on the fb page are asking for a cull...be it in a piss taking manner ..


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Tink, do yourself a favour and stop worrying. Go and grab a copy of 'men are from mars, women are from Venus' and you might find you have a better understanding of the males side of things.


I don't think I'll ever understand my OH doing something the upsets me


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

paddyjulie said:


> To be fair ..the majority of the posts on the fb page are asking for a cull...be it in a piss taking manner ..


The page I posted a link for is not a piss take. People are exchanging information on how to poison the gulls. Serious stuff disguised as "humour". Disappointed in this forum actually, you so called animal lovers would prefer to talk about imaginary friends, than help stamp out animal cruelty.


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I don't think I'll ever understand my OH doing something the upsets me


And you don't think he would be upset if he knew how often you slate him on here (if he exists)? Oh no but that is okay in your book, cos it is done behind his back!


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## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

MaryBella said:


> The page I posted a link for is not a piss take. People are exchanging information on how to poison the gulls. Serious stuff disguised as "humour". Disappointed in this forum actually, you so called animal lovers would prefer to talk about imaginary friends, than help stamp out animal cruelty.


I didn't say the cause was a piss take ....I said the people who were posting on that page were taking the piss *sigh*


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

MaryBella said:


> And you don't think he would be upset if he knew how often you slate him on here (if he exists)? Oh no but that is okay in your book, cos it is done behind his back!


He exists.......


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## MCWillow (Aug 26, 2011)

MaryBella said:


> The page I posted a link for is not a piss take. People are exchanging information on how to poison the gulls. Serious stuff disguised as "humour". Disappointed in this forum actually, you so called animal lovers would prefer to talk about imaginary friends, than help stamp out animal cruelty.


Actually a lot of people do stuff but don't feel the need to post 'seen and reported' or 'liked' or whatever the required action was.

I've reported it, and since you are slating people for inaction, thought I would let you know. Just because people haven't posted what they have done, doesnt mean they havent done it.

Not everyone has a huge ego and needs recognition for their actions.

But nice to know your thoughts on us all being 'so called animal lovers' that 'prefer to talk to imaginary friends'


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> He exists.......


Well LOVE him, rather than slate him. Life is short! Love not hate...


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## MaryBella (Jul 23, 2013)

MCWillow said:


> Actually a lot of people do stuff but don't feel the need to post 'seen and reported' or 'liked' or whatever the required action was.
> 
> I've reported it, and since you are slating people for inaction, thought I would let you know. Just because people haven't posted what they have done, doesnt mean they havent done it.
> 
> ...


Well it looked to me like you were all ignoring it. Sorry if I pressumed wrongly!


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

> tinktinktinkerbell;1063073015
> *
> It's not so much he finds others attractive its just that he comments
> 
> ...


Tink, I think you need to have a heart to heart with your man and let him know just what you posted above. You can't have a satisfying relationship keeping each other's feelings hidden. And yes you DO have to change your mindset in order to change for the better. Which you are perfectly capable of doing if you put your mind to it.

You are comparing yourself to some unattainable physical standard when it really does have to come from the inside. And Epic Schmecik, it's just a frigging expression, get over it.

Why are you staying in what seems like such a disappointing situation? Surely living alone and/or having a paid live in care taker would allow you to get to know yourself and deal with why you feel the way you do. It does sound like he is not helping your self esteem issues, but TBH the whole relationship seems a bit toxic.

Letting go of who you are is the first step to becoming who you want to be.


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## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

MaryBella said:


> I actually posted in Bird Chat two hours ago, same time when I posted in General. Don't turn this manaic thread into a MaryBella witch hunt ha ha .


Dont turn it into a Tink bitch hunt MaryBella....she is a long standing member and I dont think we want to see a newbie bitching at her...basically calling her a liar. Not right.

Welcome to the forum though...maybe hang around a bit before judging the members. We have a good laugh and a bit of banter but its all tongue in cheek.

Obviously the animal threads are more serious with us all being animal lovers but in general pretty much anything goes...except deliberately being nasty to cause offence.


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I don't think I'll ever understand my OH doing something the upsets me


Surely Tink you occasionally do things to piss him off or upset him. When you're with someone practically 24/7 it's bound to happen.

When you're in a relationship you talk about feelings. It's also about the both of you, not just one or the other That is if you both want it to work.


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

well, I cant be arsed reading all 21 pages of this thread b ut why on earth would you care what your boyfriend thought of some picture? Even if he said she was hot or shaggable it doesnt matter....its not likely he is ever going to meet her and fall madly in love is it?
Just please point out to him that an epic is a long narrative poem, not a slightly butch looking woman in sports wear!!


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

catz4m8z said:


> :
> Just please point out to him that an epic is a long narrative poem,* not a slightly butch looking woman in sports wear!!*


:lol: That's what I was thinking but didn't want to go there. 

For all you and he know, she/he/shim could be gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual, transgender or anything in between.


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

Toby Tyler said:


> :lol: That's what I was thinking but didn't want to go there.
> .


I cant decide if she is still pretty or has lifted one too many weights and entered russian gymnast territory!!:lol:


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

catz4m8z said:


> I cant decide if she is still pretty or has lifted one too many weights and entered russian gymnast territory!!:lol:


She wont age gracefully that's for dang sure. I definitely detect a bit of testosterone. She didn't attain that physique without some help without constantly dieting, exercising and lifting weights.

Let's just say if I was a guy, or even gay/lesbian, she sure as heck wouldn't be my cuppa.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Toby Tyler said:


> Tink, I think you need to have a heart to heart with your man and let him know just what you posted above. You can't have a satisfying relationship keeping each other's feelings hidden. And yes you DO have to change your mindset in order to change for the better. Which you are perfectly capable of doing if you put your mind to it.
> 
> You are comparing yourself to some unattainable physical standard when it really does have to come from the inside. And Epic Schmecik, it's just a frigging expression, get over it.
> 
> ...


I am the way I am because of him and what he's done


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

If you think she's butch you really don't want to see what I think is a great physique :laugh:



Toby Tyler said:


> Surely Tink you occasionally do things to piss him off or upset him. When you're with someone practically 24/7 it's bound to happen.
> 
> When you're in a relationship you talk about feelings. It's also about the both of you, not just one or the other That is if you both want it to work.


Of course I do but as soon as he tells me I make sure I don't do it again



catz4m8z said:


> well, I cant be arsed reading all 21 pages of this thread b ut why on earth would you care what your boyfriend thought of some picture? Even if he said she was hot or shaggable it doesnt matter....its not likely he is ever going to meet her and fall madly in love is it?
> Just please point out to him that an epic is a long narrative poem, not a slightly butch looking woman in sports wear!!


The fact he won't ever meet her really isn't the point


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I am the way I am because of him and what he's done


You are the only one who has control of that unless you relinquish that power over to him, which is your choice. Why would you stay if he is truly being mentally abusive? If that is the case you need to seriously consider speaking to a medical professional about your situation, difficult as that may be.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

I won't be speaking to a medical professional 

If I work this out its on my own


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> If you think she's butch you really don't want to see what I think is a great physique :laugh:


Have you ever considered that you would perhaps be better suited with a woman as your partner? I say this with the utmost sincerity and respect what ever sexuality someone happens to be.

It doesn't sound like you love him, let alone even like him.


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## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Toby Tyler said:


> Have you ever considered that you would perhaps be better suited with a woman as your partner? It doesn't sound like you love him, let alone even like him.


Lol, I'm not a lesbian!


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## Goblin (Jun 21, 2011)

Since meeting my wife she has problems with her back, has put on loads of weight and often has problems walking. In effect I often have to care for her. In a short while I will be going off on a weekend away on my own to a music festival. As part of this I have naturally been looking at websites involving this festival. Result, loads of young, pretty women some of whom could be described as wearing lingerie and not a lot else. My wife's only comment.. you're allowed to look, nothing else. Then she amended it.. no, second thoughts you can go as far as flirting just no touching. She trusts me to do the right thing.

If you can't trust a partner you are with the wrong person. I don't care if he is a "carer" or not. If you retain them simply as they are your "carer" both people will end up resenting it. It's always better to be alone than with the wrong person, carer or not. A carer does not necessarily have to be the other half of a relationship.


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## K9Steve (Oct 5, 2012)

That picture is heavily air brushed so it makes me wonder what else is "fake" too? Many of these models do things to their body to make it look good to them, so what is real and what is not? 

No one has a perfect body, so don't let cuff remarks depress you. Be proud of your body the best as you can.


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## LolaPup2013 (Jul 5, 2013)

This isnt reality, in the sense hes not going to meet this person and leave you for her. Im a jealous natured person yet i appreciate a good looking person with or without my OH there. Infact i draw attention to attractive females in my magazine etc - "shes looking good eh?".... IF this thread was because hed said this about someone he comes across in real life/friend/workmate i would be upset but to appreciate the finer beauty in the world and epic doesnt really sound like a compliment to me its more appreciative of the dedication shes put in to make her body like this.... i wouldnt worry


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## koekemakranka (Aug 2, 2010)

ginge2804 said:


> I think your over reacting.
> Epic doesnt mean he thinks there good lucking, more that its cool.
> 
> My bf says other girls are hot, and it doesnt bother me, women look at other men!
> ...


Well trained, like mine


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

koekemakranka said:


> Well trained, like mine


LOL I think mine would go into some sort of a seizure. He used to do alot of body building in his younger days (til he destroyed his back doing squats) and hed LOVE for me to get myself into that sort of shape 

A lad can but dream  :dita:


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## spid (Nov 4, 2008)

If you are saying that your OH has made you like this because of what HE has done to you, then you need rid - because this is a very toxic relationship.

You don't respect him, you don't seem to love him or like him. You are just waiting to pick the next hole in him. Or find the next thing to moan about. You are full of resentment about him and what he has _done_ etc. How is that a healthy relationship?

Have to agree with Goblin. I too have had problems with my back and now added to that have CFS which means I am in a lot of pain almost everyday and can't exercise as much as I like. I may be chubby and not elfin pretty anymore, but I know I have that little something else that is still attractive and sexy. It's my personality and something more, charisma on a good day! I dislike my body yes, but in general, I really quite like ME. And to hubby that is very attractive.

We have a 'don't touch' rule. But hugging and kisses on the cheek are fine, if he didn't do that with our friends etc they would think he was very, very weird. It's called being platonic. It's actually fine to look, and quite fun to flirt mildly, it enhances your sense of how attractive (not in a physical way) we are, that other people can still fancy us (whist at the same time they KNOW we are unavailable), it's a huge ego boost that lends spark to a relationship. It's you "saying look this hotty likes me, but I choose you. And I always will."

If your relationship is good, then all of this is fine. It's when there is a problem that you get paranoid, or over sensitive, etc. In a good relationship neither of you has to change. You both accept each other for what you are. You do not ask the other to change for you. If you have to, then you are in the wrong relationship. If you have changed lots for him, then maybe you are no longer the person he fell in love with. And why should you change? If you have then change back.

If whatever he did made you negative and controlling, I would be gone, otherwise the next 50 years of you life are just going to get worse!


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## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I am the way I am because of him and what he's done


Hmmmm, Tinks ........................ I don't want you to take this the wrong way girl, I like you, so I don't want to stick the boot in.

YOU are responsible for the way you are. Whatever your B/F has done, is doing etc etc, YOU are choosing to stay with him even though he may be damaging your self esteem and confidence to the point of no return.

We all have a choice. Once you recognise that damage is being done, you act on it. That way, your above quote can be turned into - I used to be the way I was, but I made a positive decision to change my life and to discard my excess baggage. I understand totally that making changes can take time and huge emotional effort, but it can be done.

Blaming someone else is a cop out. Life is for living. It's not supposed to be an endurance test. There are blips along the way, but the way you carry on, your life is one big blip. To move on, that's got to stop. You need a new mantra - I CAN DO IT


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## Etienne (Dec 8, 2010)

redroses2106 said:


> right votes in now people
> how long will this thread run for?
> 
> I will vote 8 pages


Wrong lol 23 pages so far :devil:


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

redroses2106 said:


> right votes in now people
> how long will this thread run for?
> 
> I will vote 8 pages
> ...


Way off


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

Etienne said:


> Wrong lol 23 pages so far :devil:





rona said:


> Way off


Snap ...........


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## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

Etienne said:


> Wrong lol 23 pages so far :devil:


23!!!?

It's only at page 6 for me. A mere novella


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## fierceabby (May 16, 2011)

Tinks you need to take some time to think about or write down all the good things about you and the things you are happy with about your life. 
Then think about or write down the things you want to change and set a small realistic goal to change it.... Not because you necessarily need to change and be someone else, but because you seem to want to change things but never quite get there.... 

The main reason is once you begin to love yourself, you will see that other people can love you and you won't feel so insecure and question yourself all the time. 
If you put as much energy into changing things as you do into making excuses on online forums as to why you can't do it, and running down your partner, you'd be there by now....


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

Jeez If someone makes you feel crap, negative and miserable you don't hang around for more - you dump them pronto and move on with your head held high


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

DoodlesRule said:


> Jeez If someone makes you feel crap, negative and miserable you don't hang around for more - you dump them pronto and move on with your head held high


#RocketScience


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


"thats epic" ... srs thats all he said?  ......yep overracting imo. Him being impressed with fitness has nothing to do with his feelings for you, if it did he'd not be with you.


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## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

* wonders how hurt _he_ would be knowing he was plastered in a negative way all over a site lol.


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## Aurelie (Apr 10, 2012)

Waterlily said:


> "thats epic" ... srs thats all he said?  ......yep overracting imo. Him being impressed with fitness has nothing to do with his feelings for you, if it did he'd not be with you.


What if what he had actually said was "that's Eric"? This could all be just a crazy misunderstanding about his old school friend Eric(a).


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## SammyJo (Oct 22, 2012)

She does look epic! :sosp:

(im a straight girl before anyone says otherwise :laugh

Massive over-reaction and drama over nothing (as usual) Poor bloke can't win!


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## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

ah of course it was Eric he's bessie mates with Carl from the other thread


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## myshkin (Mar 23, 2010)

DoodlesRule said:


> Jeez If someone makes you feel crap, negative and miserable you don't hang around for more - you dump them pronto and move on with your head held high


Very sound advice....but what do you do if the person making you feel crap, negative and miserable is yourself? You can't leave yourself 



Waterlily said:


> * wonders how hurt _he_ would be knowing he was plastered in a negative way all over a site lol.





SammyJo said:


> She does look epic! :sosp:
> 
> (im a straight girl before anyone says otherwise :laugh
> 
> Massive over-reaction and drama over nothing (as usual) Poor bloke can't win!


I feel sorry for the chap - walking round on eggshells, getting the blame for another person's reactions to life all the time.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

myshkin said:


> Very sound advice....but what do you do if the person making you feel crap, negative and miserable is yourself? You can't leave yourself
> 
> I feel sorry for the chap - walking round on eggshells, getting the blame for another person's reactions to life all the time.


Obviously you cannot read, if you look at the saucepan saga Tink clearly states they don't eat eggs so they are not going to have any eggshells are they now!!!


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## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

I showed my Hubby some of this last night and he told me if I ever end up like Tink, he's leaving. 

Most relationships are based on friendship, I like that my husband can tell me things, hell I look at girls with him and say "yeah she's pretty" ect. I know he wont go elsewhere because he loves me and I give him enough freedom to voice his opinions ect, infact we have a 3 person list of famous people we would if we could, his 3 famous women are stunning! My 3 men are fit! I let him watch programs with the famous girls he likes in them, he lets me watch films with my famous crushes in. 

It's freedom! Hell, he even lets me tell everyone how attractive our butcher is. Because he knows physical only goes so far.

He works in a building with close to 700 very attractive ladies, very girly, not like me, I'm a bit of a tom boy. BUT he doesn't like them, he says he couldn't cope with someone who was too worried about what shoes to wear or if they would break a nail to have fun. 

IF you want to control him, let him go. He can chase you but if you really can't change then you need to not let him back and let him move on. 

Although I am starting to doubt if this poor fella is real. Since no human can live day in and day out with being made to feel like crap without one day snapping.


----------



## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)




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## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

Jeezo 25 pages for "am I overreacting?"!! I wish I knew how to get a 25 page thread!


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## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)

so who's got "the never ending stoooooory oh oh oh ohhh wah ah ah ha" going round their head now?


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## SammyJo (Oct 22, 2012)

reallyshouldnotwearjods said:


> so who's got "the never ending stoooooory oh oh oh ohhh wah ah ah ha" going round their head now?


Yes me.... Thanks :laugh:


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## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)

Waterlily said:


> Want to see a liar go to the moon thread  lol


darn you lils, darn you indeedy!!


----------



## Waterlily (Apr 18, 2010)

reallyshouldnotwearjods said:


> darn you lils, darn you indeedy!!


aw bugger and I just deleted that post  :001_unsure:


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## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)

Waterlily said:


> aw bugger and I just deleted that post  :001_unsure:


but not quick enough pft x *pokes tongue out raspberry style*


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## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

Etienne said:


> Wrong lol 23 pages so far :devil:





rona said:


> Way off


I was shocked to wake up and still see this thread was going!


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## Tidgy (Jun 30, 2010)

Does mean men can go ape about women window shopping?


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tincan said:


> ah of course it was Eric he's bessie mates with Carl from the other thread


Wrong! Eric is what they named the new miniature pan. Carl got wrecked during the kindle debacle.


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## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

Toby Tyler said:


> Wrong! Eric is what they named the new miniature pan. Carl got wrecked during the kindle debacle.


ARE you sure it wasn't after he was used for the haircut.


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## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

Firedog said:


> ARE you sure it wasn't after he was used for the haircut.


Yup, positive! It was Priscilla the pudding bowl responsible for that debacle.


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## lisa0307 (Aug 25, 2009)

In a word....YES!


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Firedog said:


> ARE you sure it wasn't after he was used for the haircut.





Toby Tyler said:


> Yup, positive! It was Priscilla the pudding bowl responsible for that debacle.


I'm _totally_ confused now :crazy:


----------



## suzy93074 (Sep 3, 2008)

One word - YES 

I seriously think you need to lighten up a bit Tinks! honestly you seem so serious most of the time - it would do you the world of good to not take things so "literally" - 

Not many women are ever gonna look like that so I would not worry - your OH is with you cos he loves ya - there is no point worrying over a person in a magazine article ....

I must admit I feel kind of sorry for your OH ....you do seem to moan a fair bit and get on at him ....he is not allowed to take his kindle to his parents - not allowed to comment on someone in an article you have shown him .....jeeezzz poor guy - 

As I say lighten up a bit - have some fun - be happy!!!


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

K9Steve said:


> That picture is heavily air brushed so it makes me wonder what else is "fake" too? Many of these models do things to their body to make it look good to them, so what is real and what is not?
> 
> No one has a perfect body, so don't let cuff remarks depress you. Be proud of your body the best as you can.


There's nothing to be proud of

I have wonky boobs, wonky eyes, wonky calves, a birthmark on my forehead

Yeah, what's to be proud of

People on here know how bad I look


----------



## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There's nothing to be proud of
> 
> I have wonky boobs, wonky eyes, wonky calves, a birthmark on my forehead
> 
> ...


To be fair, you weren't _forced_ to post photos of yourself on here, it was your choice, if you're not happy with that choice, delete all your photos from your posts


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There's nothing to be proud of
> 
> I have wonky boobs, wonky eyes, wonky calves, a birthmark on my forehead
> 
> ...


This post stinks of self pity and attention seeking.

I'm sure you're not the only person on the forum with low self esteem, although I am starting to doubt how low your self esteem is, as if it was so low you'd be worried about your poor fella finding someone else instead of treating him like a slave.


----------



## Toby Tyler (Feb 17, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There's nothing to be proud of
> 
> I have wonky boobs, wonky eyes, wonky calves, a birthmark on my forehead
> 
> ...


Tink, I do like you and am sorry there are some laughs at your expense, but you did bring it on yourself.

All of the things you mention are *physical* attributes. As you get older you realize physical beauty doesn't last forever and it's not important. It's inner beauty that is timeless. And THAT is something you can cultivate all by yourself.


----------



## Gemmaa (Jul 19, 2009)

"Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart."


----------



## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

In all seriousness - and God knows it's difficult to be serious with you after seeing so many of your threads in the same vein - what it boils down to is that YOU need to take steps to improve YOUR life. No one else will do it for you. If the most you will do is hang around on forums moaning about poor me, I'm so ugly, my OH is so horrible to me, it's all his fault - nothing will change, apart from maybe him leaving you and you being even more sad, lonely and depressed than before.

How you live your life is up to you. If you aren't willing to do anything about it, and stop making excuses about how you couldn't possibly do this, that or the other, it won't get better.

Good luck to you.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

simplysardonic said:


> To be fair, you weren't _forced_ to post photos of yourself on here, it was your choice, if you're not happy with that choice, delete all your photos from your posts


I'm not complaining about my pics on here, I'm saying, people on here know what I look like


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

shetlandlover said:


> I'm sure you're not the only person on the forum with low self esteem,


I never once said I was


----------



## wind1 (Oct 24, 2010)

shetlandlover said:


> I'm sure you're not the only person on the forum with low self esteem


And you're definitely not the only person on the forum with wonky boobs!!


----------



## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

simplysardonic said:


> I'm _totally_ confused now :crazy:


Keep up SS.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

wind1 said:


> And you're definitely not the only person on the forum with wonky boobs!!


Are yours a massive difference? My nips are like in two different places


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Are yours a massive difference? My nips are like in two different places


I had a mate whose boobs were a cup size in difference. She just padded one out and got on with life.

Most women are wonky in some shape or form.


----------



## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Are yours a massive difference? My nips are like in two different places


Is one on your head and one on your chest?


----------



## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Firedog said:


> Keep up SS.


It's impossible, it's like a soap opera  wish my life was as exciting as these threads!


----------



## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)

thing is I could not give a flying fook how wonky your tits are, how you cant cook pasta or how enraged you were over kindlegate - I know more about your s0dding existence than I care for x think its just best to avoid you now x 

and FYI I have had the most horrendous 4 weeks of my pityfull existence ever, so if you want to send some words of comfort my way feel free (walks off in huff!!)


----------



## Firedog (Oct 19, 2011)

simplysardonic said:


> It's impossible, it's like a soap opera  wish my life was as exciting as these threads!


I think three threads have got intertwined and you need too read all 3 too understand.


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

I left the colour on my hair longer than I should have reading this thread, now I'm Ginger 

Afraid I'd have to get rid of the boyfriend, nothing in life is worth this amount of misery, not even a man.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> I had a mate whose boobs were a cup size in difference. She just padded one out and got on with life.
> 
> Most women are wonky in some shape or form.


Ah, wish mine were just a cup size difference


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Firedog said:


> Is one on your head and one on your chest?


No, ones down to my knees and the other isnt


----------



## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Firedog said:


> I think three threads have got intertwined and you need too read all 3 too understand.


It's like adders in mating season


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

simplysardonic said:


> wish my life was as exciting as these threads!


it's easy to have a life as exciting as these threads

1 - get rid of all your pots and pans, and most of your dishes too. 
2- only eat tuna and steamed pasta 
3- do not let your man do anything, you might want to lock him in the house or chain him up to make this as effective as possible he must not ever ever touch any of YOUR stuff
4- make sure you have wonky boobies preferable with one nipple on your toe and the other on your forehead. 
5- constantly test your man by showing him pictures if he says anything like "epic" immediately inform pf.
6- cut your hair into a style you hate. so you have something to moan about.

hope that helps - enjoy your new life :devil:


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No, ones down to my knees and the other isnt


Is that your disability?


----------



## kathryn773 (Sep 2, 2008)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No, ones down to my knees and the other isnt


SNAP!!!!

(i now have to write crap to get it over 10 characters)


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

redroses2106 said:


> it's easy to have a life as exciting as these threads
> 
> 1 - get rid of all your pots and pans, and most of your dishes too.
> 2- only eat tuna and steamed pasta
> ...




You people really like to twist things


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Is that your disability?


No



kathryn773 said:


> SNAP!!!!
> 
> (i now have to write crap to get it over 10 characters)


Ah

Annoying isn't it


----------



## kathryn773 (Sep 2, 2008)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No
> 
> Ah
> 
> Annoying isn't it


it is annoying - especially when the M & S fitter tells you every one is the same! then takes an hour to find a bra with cups that contains one and doesnt make the other look empty


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

Does your OH go out for hours on end? Is he home every night...all night?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

kathryn773 said:


> it is annoying - especially when the M & S fitter tells you every one is the same! then takes an hour to find a bra with cups that contains one and doesnt make the other look empty


God I would slap that M&S fitter! No not everyone is the same, yes most females have some difference but it's only slight for the most part not 2-3 cup sizes difference!

I wear genie bras if I need to but 99% of the time I'm bra less in a baggy tshirt, when I change my look though I may have to wear my genies more


----------



## vickie1985 (Feb 18, 2009)

im sure you look at men with nicer figures than your boyfriend. Doesnt mean you will ditch him as soon as a better muscle comes along does it?? 

Dont take it to heart, we are who we are.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Does your OH go out for hours on end? Is he home every night...all night?


No

Yes
........


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

vickie1985 said:


> im sure you look at men with nicer figures than your boyfriend. Doesnt mean you will ditch him as soon as a better muscle comes along does it??
> 
> Dont take it to heart, we are who we are.


I actually don't, to me my boyfriend has the best body, his body to me is epic and no ones is better, he's the most attractive man in the world to me

Of course there are other attractive men but none as much as him and all of the men I find attractive aren't too different to him, all of the females he finds attractive are the opposite of me


----------



## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm not complaining about my pics on here, I'm saying, people on here know what I look like


So bleeding what - look at Camilla she is hardly an oil painting but bagged her self a rich prince/future king over a much much younger and very attractive young lady, probably because she was fun and the other was high maintenance


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No
> 
> Yes
> ........


You've got nothing to worry about then.


----------



## vickie1985 (Feb 18, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I actually don't, to me my boyfriend has the best body, his body to me is epic and no ones is better, he's the most attractive man in the world to me
> 
> Of course there are other attractive men but none as much as him and all of the men I find attractive aren't too different to him, all of the females he finds attractive are the opposite of me


You are clearly one of a kind lol.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

vickie1985 said:


> You are clearly one of a kind lol.


How? .....


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> You've got nothing to worry about then.


You think the only worry in a relationship is cheating?


----------



## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I actually don't, to me my boyfriend has the best body, his body to me is epic and no ones is better, he's the most attractive man in the world to me
> 
> Of course there are other attractive men but none as much as him and all of the men I find attractive aren't too different to him, all of the females he finds attractive are the opposite of me


I really do not want to hurt your feelings but will be blunt - you are overweight because you eat the wrong stuff (ie crap) and too much of it and don't seem to do much. I believe you are taking steps to address that so that's a start. You lobbed your hair off because you didn't want to look feminine, it isn't that bad but its not quite right for you because it makes you look a bit butch. It will grow if you stop letting your bloke cut it, go to a decent hairdresser who can cut it in a style that will look softer and suit you. Take control of your life - good luck


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

DoodlesRule said:


> I really do not want to hurt your feelings but will be blunt - you are overweight because you eat the wrong stuff (ie crap) and too much of it and don't seem to do much. I believe you are taking steps to address that so that's a start. You lobbed your hair off because you didn't want to look feminine, it isn't that bad but its not quite right for you because it makes you look a bit butch. It will grow if you stop letting your bloke cut it, go to a decent hairdresser who can cut it in a style that will look softer and suit you. Take control of your life - good luck


I actually like my hair since my OH cut it

Btw I did go to a proper hair dresser to get it cut initially

And I did not just get it cut because it looked feminine, there were other reasons

I do not want a softer cut


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> You think the only worry in a relationship is cheating?


Thats what you have sort of implied by the context of your thread. Why else would you worry about how other women look to your partner?


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

Fits this thread quite well.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Thats what you have sort of implied by the context of your thread. Why else would you worry about how other women look to your partner?


No I haven't sort of implied anything of the sort


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I actually like my hair since my OH cut it
> 
> Btw I did go to a proper hair dresser to get it cut initially
> 
> ...





> My hair is short
> 
> And I think it looks crap


Really??!??


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> Really??!??


He cut it since I made that topic

Which I did actually say in the topic itself



tinktinktinkerbell said:


> My OH took the trimmers to it last night (back and sides)


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> He cut it since I made that topic
> 
> Which I did actually say in the topic itself


I gave up on it after a while, It got a bit long for me to keep up with


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> I gave up on it after a while, It got a bit long for me to keep up with


Yet this topic is longer lol


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Yet this topic is longer lol


You think Iv read all 31 pages? I have a FT job to contend with. I just look at the first 5 or 6 threads, dont track back to page 2 where your hair is.

Oddly enough I dont have time to hunt around for your threads  I just pick up on whats in front of me.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> You think Iv read all 31 pages? I have a FT job to contend with. I just look at the first 5 or 6 threads, dont track back to page 2 where your hair is.
> 
> Oddly enough I dont have time to hunt around for your threads  I just pick up on whats in front of me.


Ok........


----------



## Etienne (Dec 8, 2010)

Can we finish with this thread now :Yawn:


----------



## LynnM (Feb 21, 2012)

reallyshouldnotwearjods said:


> thing is I could not give a flying fook how wonky your tits are, how you cant cook pasta or how enraged you were over kindlegate - I know more about your s0dding existence than I care for x think its just best to avoid you now x
> 
> and FYI I have had the most horrendous 4 weeks of my pityfull existence ever, so if you want to send some words of comfort my way feel free (walks off in huff!!)


Oops, my two dogs just looked at me strangely because I suddenly laughed out loud at your post while drinking my tea and accidently splattered it out all over the table and my laptop. Some of the comments on this thread are hilarious. Cruel but hilarious.:lol::lol::lol: 
In fact if it keeps on going I won't even bother turning the tv on tonight as this is way more entertaining.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Etienne said:


> Can we finish with this thread now :Yawn:


Yeah just stop replying


----------



## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

reallyshouldnotwearjods said:


>


More like Dante's inferno, 7 circles of Hell  but I think we've gone way beyond 7 circles


----------



## chichi (Apr 22, 2012)

Etienne said:


> Can we finish with this thread now :Yawn:


Errrrm excuse me...we are going for an EPIC 50 pages....need lots more negativity before this closes


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

chichi said:


> Errrrm excuse me...we are going for an EPIC 50 pages....need lots more negativity before this closes


NO, NO, PLEASE GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

I have my pets they are a brilliant thing in my life

Don't know why Shelley deleted

Everyone has crap in life and plenty rant, some to friends and family, some in a diary/blog, some on a Internet forum

I don't see why it should be different for me


----------



## RockRomantic (Apr 29, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> There's nothing to be proud of
> 
> I have wonky boobs, wonky eyes, wonky calves, a birthmark on my forehead
> 
> ...


Oh for gods sake.

I was born with a facial disfigurement. My face ended just undee my bottom lip. I had to gave an operation using metal and bone from my hip tomake my chin. There are people worse of the world than wonky boobs.

Epic is a term thrown around so casually. If you dont want him looking at girls hun. Dont show him them. Be proud you have health and your boyfriend. If you dont want people to see 'how bad you look' dont put pictures then complain darlin.

Lighten up. Even if you dont feel confident act it. A smile helps. i think the majotity of women on here can say they dont love thete bodies yet in others eyes there beautiful. Its your inscurities.


----------



## Etienne (Dec 8, 2010)

chichi said:


> Errrrm excuse me...we are going for an EPIC 50 pages....need lots more negativity before this closes


Well you got the right person with Tink at the helm


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

RockRomantic said:


> Oh for gods sake.
> 
> I was born with a facial disfigurement. My face ended just undee my bottom lip. I had to gave an operation using metal and bone from my hip tomake my chin. There are people worse of the world than wonky boobs.
> 
> ...


Oh here we go, others are worse off so you have no right to :-/

I don't have my health

And again, I didn't show him, it was in a thread, I didn't know it was in there


----------



## Nonnie (Apr 15, 2009)




----------



## RockRomantic (Apr 29, 2009)

If you hate how you look so bad speak to a doctor. Even if they cant instantly fix everything they can listen and give reassurance your not different to a lot of people. They can attemot to guide you on the right track of gaining confidence.


----------



## RockRomantic (Apr 29, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Oh here we go, others are worse off so you have no right to :-/
> 
> I don't have my health
> 
> And again, I didn't show him, it was in a thread, I didn't know it was in there


Pfft. Its true. I never said you dont have a right to. I do think you just have a lot of self pitying and arent looking at anything positive. Its certainky how you come across.


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Oh here we go, others are worse off so you have no right to :-/
> 
> I don't have my health
> 
> And again, I didn't show him, it was in a thread, I didn't know it was in there


Hes with you for a reason. Just accept it and stop making issues where there are none.

General concensus is that you over reacted, maybe just take that and reflect on it abit and maybe a more positive outlook on life will make you feel better overall.

We all have issue, complex's and complaints but if we let it eat us up it would make life very miserable indeed.


----------



## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I have my pets they are a brilliant thing in my life
> 
> *Don't know why Shelley deleted*
> 
> ...


Eh??? :sosp:

Shelley, why did you delete yourself?  I know some of us are losing the will to live, but that's a bit drastic!


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Oh here we go, others are worse off so you have no right to :-/
> 
> I don't have my health
> 
> And again, I didn't show him, it was in a thread, I didn't know it was in there


Does he watch pornographic films, does he read porn mags ?


----------



## RockRomantic (Apr 29, 2009)

simplysardonic said:


> Eh??? :sosp:
> 
> Shelley, why did you delete yourself?  I know some of us are losing the will to live, but that's a bit drastic!


I think i could sit and watch your signature with the dog and duck forever


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

Unless there was spunk on your screen afterwards then yes you over reacted. But dont worry to much about it. Lots of things are epic. 1 girl and an entire rugby team.. Now that was an epic vid.


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

Doctors can't do anything for trolls unfortunately. 

Seriously though, no doctor will help someone who wont help themselves (i.e cut out eating take away's and ready meals) you're too disabled to do anything for yourself big deal, there are people out there who have worse disabilities who still manage to do normal things. 

I know one member of this forum was disabled and she was in a wheel chair, did she let it get her down? hell no! Now her life is much better, her health is much better, because sitting and stewing does nothing, getting out and about, building yourself up works wonders.


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

Robnsacha said:


> Unless there was spunk on your screen afterwards then yes you over reacted. But dont worry to much about it. Lots of things are epic. 1 girl and an entire rugby team.. Now that was an epic vid.


Hahahah that was a seriously epic post


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

RockRomantic said:


> If you hate how you look so bad speak to a doctor. Even if they cant instantly fix everything they can listen and give reassurance your not different to a lot of people. They can attemot to guide you on the right track of gaining confidence.


A doctor can't help me with my appearance



RockRomantic said:


> Pfft. Its true. I never said you dont have a right to. I do think you just have a lot of self pitying and arent looking at anything positive. Its certainky how you come across.


I'm just in a very down state at the mo, I will pull myself out of it


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Does he watch pornographic films, does he read porn mags ?


No

No

.........


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

You know I been thinking, seriously about this thread, it's a real wonder tink's boyfriend isn't in the loony bin

Can't look at other women, can't speak about other women, don't watch porn, don't read lads mags, cares for tinks, cooks for tinks, is there 24/7 can't go out, don't do much when he's in, can't play on a kindle..ffs talk about suppressed or what


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

JeanGenie said:


> You know I been thinking, seriously about this thread, it's a real wonder tink's boyfriend isn't in the loony bin
> 
> Can't look at other women, can't speak about other women, don't watch porn, don't read lads mags, cares for tinks, cooks for tinks, is there 24/7 can't go out, don't do much when he's in, can't play on a kindle..ffs talk about suppressed or what


Another twister of words


----------



## reallyshouldnotwearjods (Nov 19, 2012)

I just gave myself a f1st fook


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Another twister of words


How so..?

Only going on what you posted here, is he a monk?


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No
> 
> No
> 
> .........


Is he with you 24 hours a day ?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

JeanGenie said:


> How so..?
> 
> Only going on what you posted here, is he a monk?


No, you are twisting what I've put on here



Lavenderb said:


> Is he with you 24 hours a day ?


Yes


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No, you are twisting what I've put on here
> 
> Yes


You go everywhere with him?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> You go everywhere with him?


Yes.......


----------



## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Yes


There's your problem. You need to spend some time apart and stop living in each other's pockets. Find something interesting to do with yourself and you wouldn't spend as much time obsessing over what he thinks of a picture of some girl.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Megan345 said:


> There's your problem. You need to spend some time apart and stop living in each other's pockets. Find something interesting to do with yourself and you wouldn't spend as much time obsessing over what he thinks of a picture of some girl.


No we don't need to spend some time apart

And I can't be left alone because of my disability

And no before you say I have no one to come and sit with me


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Yes.......


haven't you said before that you are housebound due to disability, so he must have to leave without you sometimes?


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

Each to their own, but that would drive me (and OH i expect) insane!


----------



## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Isn't it unhealthy to be with someone 24/7 with no breaks, esp if that someone is the designated carer?

Does he ever get the chance to go out with friends, to the pub or cinema, or out to see family, without you?


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No we don't need to spend some time apart
> 
> And I can't be left alone because of my disability
> 
> And no before you say I have no one to come and sit with me


Now this is a really serious question.

What would happen to you, if he left?

If he's not there to care for you, then it must mean someone else would have to be.


----------



## polishrose (Oct 26, 2011)

I think I'd go insane if someone was around 24 hours a day. And serious question now. If you can't look after yourself how are you able to look after your animals ?


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm just in a very down state at the mo, I will pull myself out of it


Dont do it too quickly this thread kept me going at work last night till gone midnight and im on another one of those shifts now. Another 3hrs and 15mins please!!!


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

I can Not believe this is still going..

I firmly believe Tinks is a little bit jackanory and I can't believe people are falling for it..



tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Why assume we are miserable? We are both quite happy actually





tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Yes it is actually
> 
> I have everything I want in life bar a fully working body
> 
> But aside from the body thing I couldn't be happier


Not so very long ago...

But here we now have stories of a abusive relationships not a blissfully happy engagement as made out...

Never heard so much BS outta one mouth before :bored:


----------



## welshjet (Mar 31, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> No we don't need to spend some time apart
> 
> And I can't be left alone because of my disability
> 
> And no before you say I have no one to come and sit with me


Tinks, as much as I absolutely adore and love my OH, we still have time apart, even to the point of being away for a week on a hen party holiday

Have i missed what your disability is, or have you not said, if not, perhaps if we know what it is, there may be some help advice that could be offered.

Can you not get a carer in every so often to give you both some help .

Other option is perhaps look at respite care every so often.

As regards to wonky/different size boobs, most people have this. I know of someone who is a G cuo on one side and a AA on the other, - she never let it affect her life, in fact she married her childhood sweetheart.


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

I don't think you are as disabled as you try to make out, I think you enjoy the attention, you will loose your oh one day if this is how you really treat him, he can't possibly be happy with a life like that, I know I would be miserable, is he really anything more to you than a carer, I think maybe you don't want him but don't want anyone else to have him. 

I feel really sorry for you, you never try to be positive about anything in life, and seem to enjoy creating problems for yourself, maybe you should try harder to get out of the house and be a more positive person, maybe speak to a doctor because being sooo negative and controlling is just not a normal way for a fully grown adult to behave.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

redroses2106 said:


> haven't you said before that you are housebound due to disability, so he must have to leave without you sometimes?


Not completely housebound no


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

welshjet said:


> Have i missed what your disability is


Google is your friend...



> Out of interest tinktink, why say in the 'want to replace bicep curls with something thread' that you received a letter confirming you have hypermobility, which someone on tsr sugeested you might have, but then on moneysavingexpert post that the letter you received only stated that 'it tends to be physiotherapy or occupational therapy thats offered if you are having issues' and then 'i just want a proper diagnosis so i can start working towards some kind or normality'
> 
> If your letter stated you have it, why then say you just want a proper diagnosis?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

simplysardonic said:


> Isn't it unhealthy to be with someone 24/7 with no breaks, esp if that someone is the designated carer?
> 
> Does he ever get the chance to go out with friends, to the pub or cinema, or out to see family, without you?


It's what we decided and yes I do mean we

We spent all our time together before I became disabled


----------



## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> It's what we decided and yes I do mean we
> 
> We spent all our time together before I became disabled


Why would you want to spend all your time with someone who makes you feel so horrible and inadequate


----------



## polishrose (Oct 26, 2011)

You may have missed my question. If you are so disabled that you can't look after yourself without 24 hour care, how do you manage to look after your pets?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

welshjet said:


> .
> 
> As regards to wonky/different size boobs, most people have this. I know of someone who is a G cuo on one side and a AA on the other, - she never let it affect her life, in fact she married her childhood sweetheart.


Wow that is a massive difference, did she get anything done about it?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

grumpy goby said:


> Why would you want to spend all your time with someone who makes you feel so horrible and inadequate


Because he doesn't make me feel it all the time


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

polishrose said:


> You may have missed my question. If you are so disabled that you can't look after yourself without 24 hour care, how do you manage to look after your pets?


With the help of my OH


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Sorry people but you are being duped, there are 1000's upon 1000's of thread all along the same vein, on Cosmo, Mens Health?? Money Saver, The Student Room etc, all giving to woe is me all getting the same amount of response. Same person same story on everyone 

Tink is a troll and is doing it for attention seeking, she's paying for stuff with her wage, then not able to work because of disabilities ( all in a few weeks), she's happy with her OH then she's in an abusive relationship, also a really outstanding thread about her sex life, or lack it ever and I mean ever, every other forum is talking about other forums threads.. People are still giving her time...


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

And almost two years ago this question was asked..



> If a person is in a wheelchair or has a disability would that put you off?


Tinks answered..



> tbh yes it would put me off, too many complications


And asked again



> What if you saw someone absolutely stunning in a wheelchair? Would you still be wary or turned off?


Tinks replied..



> yes i would still be turned off, would create a lot of complications IMO


Someone then said..



> Fair enough thats your opinion, but don't you think the benefits could outweigh the complications? In some cases (depends on the disability of course) there aren't many complications at all and the person can be very independent


Tinks replied..



> but they would still probably need things done for them


----------



## loubyfrog (Feb 29, 2012)

I'm really sorry Tink but i think you wallow in your own self pity and quite enjoy it too.

A lot of people have health problems,disabilities and mental health disorders but they don't sit at home staring at their belly buttons day in and day out....they get on with life as we aint here for long so we all need to live it to the full.

I think you should do the same.


----------



## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

Try one of these might make a new woman of you.

:ihih:


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

loubyfrog said:


> I'm really sorry Tink but i think you wallow in your own self pity and quite enjoy it too.
> 
> A lot of people have health problems,disabilities and mental health disorders but they don't sit at home staring at their belly buttons day in and day out....they get on with life as we aint here for long so we all need to live it to the full.
> 
> I think you should do the same.


I am trying which is why im starting the 5 2 diet on Monday


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I am trying which is why im starting the 5 2 diet on Monday


Yea yea why do people always have to start things on a monday???. If you were that bothered you would start imediately!!


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Yea yea why do people always have to start things on a monday???. If you were that bothered you would start imediately!!


Because I want my week to start on a Monday so I can keep track of the fast days better


----------



## cinnamontoast (Oct 24, 2010)

Please read!!



Meezey said:


> Sorry people but you are being duped, there are 1000's upon 1000's of thread all along the same vein, on Cosmo, Mens Health?? Money Saver, The Student Room etc, all giving to woe is me all getting the same amount of response. Same person same story on everyone
> 
> Tink is a troll and is doing it for attention seeking, she's paying for stuff with her wage, then not able to work because of disabilities ( all in a few weeks), she's happy with her OH then she's in an abusive relationship, also a really outstanding thread about her sex life, or lack it ever and I mean ever, every other forum is talking about other forums threads.. People are still giving her time...


----------



## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

Is this still going 

Ok , heres my take on all this
Tink loves the attention she gets here , she loves the misery and woe is me and wallows in it , and wants us to wallow in it with her

Im all for a good pity party now and then , but to stay in it day after day after day ... and not even try to get help for yourself , thats not natural ... who _wants_ to be miserable , enjoy what you have , make the most of what you have and do what you can do ... theres zero sense in all these 'poor me' threads if theres no intention of bettering yourself or taking the advice you are given
Negativity breeds negativity


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

I'm not a troll as it happens but if you want to think that I really done care


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Because I want my week to start on a Monday so I can keep track of the fast days better


Sorry but what a load of B***ocks


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Mese said:


> not even try to get help for yourself ,


I am actually


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Sorry but what a load of B***ocks


Oh well I don't really care if you think it's ******


----------



## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

RockRomantic said:


> Oh for gods sake.
> 
> I was born with a facial disfigurement. My face ended just undee my bottom lip. I had to gave an operation using metal and bone from my hip tomake my chin. There are people worse of the world than wonky boobs.
> 
> ...


You my lovely are an inspiration, in all the years of being on this forum I don't think I have heard you complain once! and you know what, I look at your pictures and all I see is beauty, and you are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside x


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm not a troll as it happens but if you want to think that I really done care


Tink what would you do if you woke tomorrow and your partner wasn't there? How would you manage? 'Can't' isn't an option.


----------



## Royoyo (Feb 21, 2013)

If you put tinktinktinkerbell into Google loads and loads of threads come up, there's also some rather 'private' pictures on Google images, I don't really know why anyone would want those types of pictures on the internet anyways...But Tink why do you enjoy attention so much on the internet? are you lonely? bored? i'm just curious really, not having a go.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Lavenderb said:


> Tink what would you do if you woke tomorrow and your partner wasn't there? How would you manage? 'Can't' isn't an option.


I don't know


----------



## Lavenderb (Jan 27, 2009)

MissShelley said:


> You my lovely are an inspiration, in all the years of being on this forum I don't think I have heard you complain once! and you know what, I look at your pictures and all I see is beauty, and you are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside x


Am glad you said that Shelley, I've always thought the same. I don't think tink realises how lucky she is.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

You can't really say how lucky or not a person is unless you live a day in their lives

It's like me saying celebrities are lucky, all that money etc but I don't know what's its like for them in reality


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Oh well I don't really care if you think it's ******


Yep thats the problem you dont really care you just crave attention and want people to feel sorry for you. I have never heard of anyone that seem to wallow in self pity as much as you do!


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

Really low self-esteem but posts pics like this on a forum.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

button50 said:


> Yep thats the problem you dont really care you just crave attention and want people to feel sorry for you. I have never heard of anyone that seem to wallow in self pity as much as you do!


Oh well...


----------



## cinnamontoast (Oct 24, 2010)

See post 5

Some serious issues from Tink :: Men's Health

Hyper mobility does not suddenly appear as a disability.

See post 6, seems she does eat eggs after all:
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts14773187.aspx

And why is she on this site when has been with bf for 12 years allegedly?

Posted under 2 years ago, yet the bf can't say he thinks a picture of a girl is epic?

Is it normal to not be sexually attracted to other races? 
Posted: 11/9/2011 12:37:29 PM
im attracted to anyone regardless of race if they are gorgeous enough

i mean what woman wouldnt shag jason mamoa

See post 135 on this page:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=140495381&page=5.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

shetlandlover said:


> Really low self-esteem but posts pics like this on a forum.


From years ago


----------



## polishrose (Oct 26, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> From years ago


When was that pic taken then?


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> From years ago


Doesn't matter, your disability doesn't just appear one day, nor does lack of self confidence. You my dear, seem more than confident, BUT notice how it's an attention seeking image not just a normal picture, everything you do is for attention.


----------



## MissShelley (May 9, 2010)

shetlandlover said:


> Really low self-esteem but posts pics like this on a forum.


Goodness gracious me and glory to god! what the mutherfudge is going on there!!!!!!!!!!!! :sosp:










HALP! HALP!


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

shetlandlover said:


> Really low self-esteem but posts pics like this on a forum.


Sh*t footaball team!!

Wow your self esteem must be so low to have pic's like this on the internet i feel so sorry for you.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

polishrose said:


> When was that pic taken then?


About 5-6 years ago could have been longer ago


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

cinnamontoast said:


> .
> 
> See post 6, seems she does eat eggs after all:
> The Humble crumpet Free Dating, Singles and Personals
> ...


That's not actually me

You do realise not every tinktinktinkbell will be me right?



shetlandlover said:


> Doesn't matter, your disability doesn't just appear one day, nor does lack of self confidence. You my dear, seem more than confident, BUT notice how it's an attention seeking image not just a normal picture, everything you do is for attention.


I was confident then yes


----------



## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> About 5-6 years ago could have been longer ago


Well it was posted on moneysavingexpert in 2010.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

shetlandlover said:


> Well it was posted on moneysavingexpert in 2010.


So?

Doesn't mean it was taken then


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

shetlandlover said:


> Well it was posted on moneysavingexpert in 2010.


Christ what kind of money you saving having to post pics like that on moneysavingexpert!!

I want to now go give myself a full frontal lobotomy to erase that image from my mind


----------



## cinnamontoast (Oct 24, 2010)

cinnamontoast said:


> See post 5
> 
> Some serious issues from Tink :: Men's Health
> 
> ...


In case anyone missed it. Funny how the talk is of muscling up and ooh, the 'Am I overreacting' thread is all about a muscly girl. Let's not pretend that there are lots of different people posting about the same thing with the same user name by mere chance


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

cinnamontoast said:


> In case anyone missed it. Funny how the talk is of muscling up and ooh, the 'Am I overreacting' thread is all about a muscly girl. Let's not pretend that there are lots of different people posting about the same thing with the same user name by mere chance


I'm on about the POF site, that is not me


----------



## redroses2106 (Aug 21, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Not completely housebound no


well then stop spending your life trolling forums and go do something!

when you are on your death bed and someone asks, did you have a good life what will your reply be? yes it was great I trolled forums


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

redroses2106 said:


> well then stop spending your life trolling forums and go do something!
> 
> when you are on your death bed and someone asks, did you have a good life what will your reply be? yes it was great I trolled forums


I'm not trolling

Oh and I have been out, been out in the sun, it's gone for the time being though and we have things we are waiting on being delivered

I only went out yesterday, not like I've sat in for weeks


----------



## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

cinnamontoast said:


> In case anyone missed it. Funny how the talk is of muscling up and ooh, the 'Am I overreacting' thread is all about a muscly girl. Let's not pretend that there are lots of different people posting about the same thing with the same user name by mere chance


The subject has been raised before, about Tink posting all these threads on other forums, and how she's an attention seeking troll. Thread got closed, surprisingly enough rrr:


----------



## CatsDomino (Oct 10, 2012)

Why would he call you 'epic'? 

Perhaps in scope?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

CatsDomino said:


> Why would he call you 'epic'?
> 
> Perhaps in scope?


----------



## CatsDomino (Oct 10, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


>


I've read enough of your threads (both here and elsewhere) to know when you're trolling - need we remember the fishnets incident when you posted images of yourself in them and a Newcastle FC shirt?!

What next?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

CatsDomino said:


> I've read enough of your threads (both here and elsewhere) to know when you're trolling - need we remember the fishnets incident when you posted images of yourself in them and a Newcastle FC shirt?!
> 
> What next?


If you think I'm trolling then run along to another thread


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

My OH wants me to have a boob job coz he says I'm ugly do you think I'm over reacting that I smacked him in the face with my fist?


----------



## button50 (Apr 16, 2012)

Meezey said:


> My OH wants me to have a boob job coz he says I'm ugly do you think I'm over reacting that I smacked him in the face with my fist?


Sounds EPIC!!!


----------



## CatsDomino (Oct 10, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> If you think I'm trolling then run along to another thread


I can't run - I have a problem with my knees. Like you. Only you can deadlift the weight of a small car.


----------



## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

posted twice ......


----------



## polishrose (Oct 26, 2011)

And in the* same thread*(elsewhere) ask for advice how to bump up calories and say you want to lose weight....is it just me that doesn't understand that at all?


----------



## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

Maybe I should start a thread about how ive been sociophobic since 1999 and have left the house less than 15 times in all those years (bar walking the dogs when I know people arent around) and can go weeks without seeing a single soul or days without actually talking to someone that doesnt have four legs and woofs 

But .... I make the most out of what I have and what I can do and appreciate highly what others do for me , and I rarely allow myself a pity party online so I doubt my thread would garner this much attention  

You should appreciate what and who you have while it or he/she is around , no-one likes a misery guts


----------



## Nonnie (Apr 15, 2009)




----------



## welshjet (Mar 31, 2011)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Wow that is a massive difference, did she get anything done about it?


Nope she hasnt, she just accepted it and got on with her life, she is very happyvand confident with her body as is


----------



## cinnamontoast (Oct 24, 2010)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> I'm on about the POF site, that is not me


I.e. all the other profiles are?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

CatsDomino said:


> I can't run - I have a problem with my knees. Like you. Only you can deadlift the weight of a small car.


Lol no I can't

I USED to be able to


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

Love what happens when you start putting username into Google


----------



## dougal22 (Jun 18, 2010)

shetlandlover said:


> Really low self-esteem but posts pics like this on a forum.


Jesus Mary and Joseph 

*cross oneself*

I'll be having fecking nightmares after seeing that.

.


----------



## polishrose (Oct 26, 2011)

Google is wonderful...maybe you took too much testosterone tink and that's what made you want to be less feminine?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

welshjet said:


> Nope she hasnt, she just accepted it and got on with her life, she is very happyvand confident with her body as is


Good for her (that's meant none sarcastically btw)



cinnamontoast said:


> I.e. all the other profiles are?


Men's health, student room etc yes


----------



## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

God we're not doing all this google stalking crap are we again? What's the excuse for such behaviour this time?


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

polishrose said:


> Google is wonderful...maybe you took too much testosterone tink and that's what made you want to be less feminine?


I haven't taken any


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Phoolf said:


> God we're not doing all this google stalking crap are we again? What's the excuse for such behaviour this time?


Because they are a bunch of bullies who like trying to humiliate people

And they claim I'm the one that has to get on with life!


----------



## paddyjulie (May 9, 2009)

dougal22 said:


> Jesus Mary and Joseph
> 
> *cross oneself*
> 
> ...


I agree the Newcastle top is a bit much


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

paddyjulie said:


> I agree the Newcastle top is a bit much


:laugh:

......


----------



## Guest (Jul 24, 2013)

Phoolf said:


> God we're not doing all this google stalking crap are we again? What's the excuse for such behaviour this time?


No one seriously has that amount of time on their hands, really..

I'd love to entertain myself for hours on end, sadly I can't, I'll be old and decrepit by the time I'd finished


----------



## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Because they are a bunch of bullies who like trying to humiliate people
> 
> And they claim I'm the one that has to get on with life!


I'm neither here nor there with you tink to be honest, but I can't stand bullies, and for all the people screaming that you love attention well...they must need their heads (or IQs) testing because that's all they're giving you.

GC really is very odd at times.


----------



## sskmick (Feb 4, 2008)

tinktinktinkerbell said:


> Earlier I showed my boyfriend a topic and it had this pic in it
> 
> http://www.girlswithmuscle.com/images/full/303703794.jpg
> 
> ...


I'd worry about OH if he found muscle bound women attractive. Some can look "fit" but others can look like hulks - absolutely gross to me, that goes for the men too. Its as though they don't know when to stop.

I prefer my veins to run on the inside not outside. So tbh even if I wanted to pump up my muscles I wouldn't and if any partner of mine expected me to then that would be the end of the relationship.

If I am honest I doubt very much he was making any comparison he was just voicing his thoughts on a picture.

Get yourself an adult fantasy catalogue, choose something that suits your mood and surprise him


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Phoolf said:


> I'm neither here nor there with you tink to be honest, but I can't stand bullies, and for all the people screaming that you love attention well...they must need their heads (or IQs) testing because that's all they're giving you.
> 
> GC really is very odd at times.


FFS so google is now bullying? Must remember that when I use it to research a customer...


----------



## welshjet (Mar 31, 2011)

:lol: I can remember when I did a saucy pose for my OH, I think I downed about 3 bottles of vino verde 

And no pics :nonod:


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

welshjet said:


> :lol: I can remember when I did a saucy pose for my OH, I think I downed about 3 bottles og pvino verde
> 
> And no pics :nonod:


I'd say google your own name just to make sure there are no pictures, but seemingly googling is bulling....


----------



## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

Meezey said:


> FFS so google is now bullying? Must remember that when I use it to research a customer...


When you research a customer do you and 100 mates start laughing at them on the internet where they can see it? Is this how adults behave? Seems rather like you should have left these kind of tactics in the playground at school, or perhaps you've been watching Mean Girls one time too many.


----------



## jenniferx (Jan 23, 2009)

polishrose said:


> When was that pic taken then?





tinktinktinkerbell said:


> About 5-6 years ago could have been longer ago





shetlandlover said:


> Well it was posted on moneysavingexpert in 2010.





tinktinktinkerbell said:


> So?
> 
> Doesn't mean it was taken then


It was taken in 2006. The exif data from the picture gives the date as August 14th 2006.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Phoolf said:


> I'm neither here nor there with you tink to be honest, but I can't stand bullies, and for all the people screaming that you love attention well...they must need their heads (or IQs) testing because that's all they're giving you.
> 
> GC really is very odd at times.


Yes exactly! They moan (after having a go at me for moaning) that I'm attention seeking, yet here they are replying!

If I genuinely thought someone was an attention seeker I would read their topic once and not even enter it again

Of course they will come out with some crap about it being "difficult" to ignore me (even though there's a ignore feature)


----------



## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

43 pages!!! Oh my lord!


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Phoolf said:


> When you research a customer do you and 100 mates start laughing at them on the internet where they can see it? Is this how adults behave? Seems rather like you should have left these kind of tactics in the playground at school, or perhaps you've been watching Mean Girls one time too many.


Ummm if you read, I haven't really commented on the thread, and I also asked why Tink opened herself up for such ridicule, I do feel sorry for her, and to have 1000's upon 1000's of threads in the same such manner all over the internet, does concern me, if someone seems to get pleasure of of it, and keep doing it over and over and over again, hardly think you can start throwing accusation around about people being bullies.....

Oh and I think I only addressed a comment to Tink ONCE... Big time bullying that...


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

jenniferx said:


> It was taken in 2006. The exif data from the picture gives the date as August 14th 2006.


Thank you

So 7 years ago then

Yeah there's no way I would take pics like that now


----------



## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

Meezey said:


> Ummm if you read, I haven't really commented on the thread, and I also asked why Tink opened herself up for such ridicule, I do feel sorry for her, and to have 1000's upon 1000's of threads in the same such manner all over the internet, does concern me, if someone seems to get pleasure of of it, and keep doing it over and over and over again, hardly think you can start throwing accusation around about people being bullies.....


I don't really give two hoots if you've been commenting on this thread at all, I've no desire to read much of it considering it's full of people being nasty and belligerent to one member and one member alone (or do I have it wrong), does this seem fair? I was making a general comment about the tone and level of this thread, you saw fit to try and contradict it somehow (still don't see your point tbh) and hence I replied to you. Accusations of bullying? If the shoe fits.

The odd thing is you're all up in arms if a young girl kills herself because of internet bullying, and yet many of you are complicit in it.


----------



## tinktinktinkerbell (Nov 15, 2008)

Meezey said:


> Ummm if you read, I haven't really commented on the thread, and I also asked why Tink opened herself up for such ridicule, I do feel sorry for her, and to have 1000's upon 1000's of threads in the same such manner all over the internet, does concern me, if someone seems to get pleasure of of it, and keep doing it over and over and over again, hardly think you can start throwing accusation around about people being bullies.....
> 
> Oh and I think I only addressed a comment to Tink ONCE... Big time bullying that...


You've made a few bitchy comments


----------



## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Phoolf said:


> I don't really give two hoots if you've been commenting on this thread at all, I've no desire to read much of it considering it's full of people being nasty and belligerent to one member and one member alone (or do I have it wrong), does this seem fair? I was making a general comment about the tone and level of this thread, you saw fit to try and contradict it somehow (still don't see your point tbh) and hence I replied to you. Accusations of bullying? If the shoe fits.
> 
> The odd thing is you're all up in arms if a young girl kills herself because of internet bullying, and yet many of you are complicit in it.


That's the point though, you haven't read it but can still sling accusations around.... I was the one who posted about google first. So hence why I "saw fit to contradict it" being a bully for using google...

The shoe doesn't fit, hence me seeing fit to contradict it.


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## Phoolf (Jun 13, 2012)

Just as a last comment before I head off to bed. You might all think it's a giggle to sit there and laugh at someone behind a computer screen, but deep down what does it say about you? I mean really. Doesn't something in your head kick in at a certain point and say 'actually no, this is a bit wrong now, this is a human being, and regardless of whether he/she winds me up or lies I'm actually a decent person and nice so why am I doing this?' Oh right, joining in with the crowd. It's easier to have a laugh when all your mates join it, it makes you feel like it's not your responsibility if someone is upset...after all...everyone else is doing it, right? 

I hope you're very happy but honestly some of you ought to be ashamed of yourselves, and many of you have lost quite a lot of respect imo.


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## lymorelynn (Oct 4, 2008)

I really think this has gone on for long enough. 
I have just a couple of comments:
If you don't want to know the answer, don't ask the question.
and it's a little late in this to be calling it bullying when the OP has responded to most of the comments without any problem.


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