# Won't be on for a while..



## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Don't worry, Muttly is fine.

Hope to be back soon.

Take care everyone.


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## jamat (Jun 3, 2015)

hope all is ok


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

Never mind Muttley, I hope you're OK ?


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## Bisbow (Feb 20, 2012)

Whatever your problem I hope you get it sorted soon

Take care of yourself


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks guys possibly a whole life upheaval. Work disciplinary at 4 and home is now unbearable
I just don't know if I have the guts to do it.


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

I'm going to miss you both, come back soon. Hope everything is ok


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

Lots of vibes to give you the strength to do whatever has to be done - and massive hugs.


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## AlexPed2393 (Oct 5, 2016)

Hope everything goes well and that you and Muttly are back soon


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## jamat (Jun 3, 2015)

Big hugs fingers will be crossed all goes well..... whatever happens Muttly will alway be there to give you unconditional love and cuddles 

Keep safe


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Ahhh Muttly hope all goes well and you make decisions that land you in a better position xxx


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## Shikoku (Dec 16, 2013)

Hope everything goes well, take care and I hope to see plenty of Muttly pictures on the forum again soon x


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## Piguinn (Nov 21, 2016)

Take care Muttly, you will be missed. Come back soon!


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## SixStar (Dec 8, 2009)

Take care.


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## Tyton (Mar 9, 2013)

Take care, try and keep calm through the work thing, and come vent on here if needed. Hugs to you and Muttly x


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## LinznMilly (Jun 24, 2011)

Take care, Muttly. You're stronger than you.


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## Westie Mum (Feb 5, 2015)

Oh bless you. I know things haven't be easy. 

Deep breathes. 

Remember you only have one life and you need to live it. For you. In happiness. 

Hugs x x


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## Matrod (Dec 22, 2014)

Take care, I hope everything works out & we see you back here soon x


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## Guest (Mar 17, 2017)

Sorry to hear you're having a tough go of it. Hope things sort themselves out soon.


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

Big hugs to you, hope everything goes OK...hope to hear from you soon.


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## Sled dog hotel (Aug 11, 2010)

Muttly said:


> Don't worry, Muttly is fine.
> 
> Hope to be back soon.
> 
> Take care everyone.


Hope you are OK, and look forward to your return.


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## Lolapop87 (Feb 3, 2017)

Big hugs,take care and hope everything goes ok for you.hope to see you back on here soon x


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

*HUGS* 

I will miss you and all the lovely pictures, hope to see you back again when you are ready. 

I know things have not been easy lately and I remember your posts a little while ago, I hope whatever you decide makes you happy. 

We will be here for you when you are ready. 

Take care of yourself.


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

Oh Muttly I am so so sorry, if you need an ear send me a pm, happy to email/text if you need it, please take care of yourself and come back when you are ready xxx


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

I really hope you are ok, remember there is more to life than work and partnerships.


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Wishing you all the very best and hope you can get everything sorted out.

Life is short - we should make sure we are living it the way that makes us happy 

Take care x


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## Maxine67 (Mar 28, 2016)

Hope you are ok, you're stronger than you think, take care xx


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## kamikaze (Feb 4, 2017)

we will miss you !! Hope all is well!


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## Mum2Heidi (Feb 17, 2010)

I'm sorry to hear this. You will both be missed.
I hope you get things sorted and come back soon
Take care of yourself.


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## PawsOnMe (Nov 1, 2012)

Take care of your self and I hope everything gets sorted out xx


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## Lilylass (Sep 13, 2012)

Look after yourself & hope everything is sorted soon 

We will miss you both .... but will be waiting for you when you're ready / able to come back 

Take care x


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## rottiepointerhouse (Feb 9, 2014)

I do believe things happen for a reason, sometimes one situation arising gives us a little shove to sort out another situation we are not happy with but have been coasting along and not facing up to. Whatever happens your little man will be there for you and we are all here too when you are able to get back on line.


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## Twiggy (Jun 24, 2010)

Muttly said:


> Don't worry, Muttly is fine.
> 
> Hope to be back soon.
> 
> Take care everyone.


So sorry. Hope things improve for you very soon.


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## planete (Jan 21, 2012)

Very sorry to read you are going through a tough time. Hugs and best wishes. xxx


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## chissy 15 (Mar 13, 2013)

So sorry your having a hard time. Do what's right for you however hard it might seem now! (((Hugs)))


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

Hope everything works out OK for you and that you back here soon. Big Hugs.


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## Honeys mum (Jan 11, 2013)

Very sorry to hear this. Hoping everything works out well for you and Muttly, and you find the strength to do whatever you have to do.
You will both be missed, come back when you are ready.

Take care, and remember whatever happens, your lovely Muttly will always be there for you.xx
(((((big hugs for you both.)))))


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## kimthecat (Aug 11, 2009)

Take care and don't be gone too long !


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## Guest (Mar 17, 2017)

Take care. Life is tough but so are you.


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## Sairy (Nov 22, 2016)

Sorry to hear you are going through a tough time. Sending you lots of good vibes and love. Take care and I hope to see you back on here soon.


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## Guest (Mar 17, 2017)

Look after yourself. Hope you are ok. If you need a chat pm me.


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## kitty25 (Mar 11, 2011)

I also believe everything happens for a reason. Hope it all sorts itself out soon. Take care xx


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## Hanwombat (Sep 5, 2013)

Hope to see you both back soon.. x


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## new westie owner (Apr 30, 2010)

Hope it sorts itself out good. Luck


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## Team_Trouble (Apr 11, 2016)

Hugs. I hope you will be ok and back soon


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## AllthingsRodent (Dec 13, 2013)

Sending positive vibes an hope you get things sorted. take care and hope to hear from you soon .


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## KPope (Mar 16, 2016)

Going to miss your posts. Hope your situation gets better.


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## Aahlly (Sep 12, 2014)

I hope things will settle down for you ASAP. I'll be looking out for your return, take care of yourself x


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

Hugs x


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## McKayz86 (Jan 31, 2016)

Hope you're ok x


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## Blitz (Feb 12, 2009)

Come back and have a moan if you need to, good luck with everything


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## icklemunch (May 4, 2015)

Do hope you're ok.

Take care x


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## rockdot (Jul 19, 2016)

I will miss your posts too.
Good luck with everything, hope all works out for the best.


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## MaggiesMom (Oct 13, 2016)

Hope you're OK, here if you need to chat.
Look forward to seeing you and muttly back soon, take care xx


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## cbcdesign (Jul 3, 2014)

Best of luck to you.


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## Mercgirl (Feb 18, 2017)

Sorry to hear you're going through a bad time. I hope everything works out for you.


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## MilleD (Feb 15, 2016)

I hope @Muttly is ok.

I miss your pics of Goldie.


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## Team_Trouble (Apr 11, 2016)

Thinking of you both x


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

KatieandOliver said:


> Thinking of you both x


Me too. Hope everything is getting sorted out and you are both fine


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

Guys, I am quite worried about @Muttly. She hasn't been around since she started this thread, I have pm'd her she wont have seen it.

Did anyone ever meet up with her for a walk or was that someone else? I don't want to invade her privacy but if she has been in touch with anyone through Facebook or other social media it would be reassuring to know she is ok.


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

Yes, there are many of us who are very concerned. Any reassurance or reports would be greatly appreciated.


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## winterrose (Dec 30, 2016)

Same here, hope she is OK.


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## rottiepointerhouse (Feb 9, 2014)

JoanneF said:


> Guys, I am quite worried about @Muttly. She hasn't been around since she started this thread, I have pm'd her she wont have seen it.
> 
> Did anyone ever meet up with her for a walk or was that someone else? I don't want to invade her privacy but if she has been in touch with anyone through Facebook or other social media it would be reassuring to know she is ok.


If she has access to her emails she might have seen a PM. I'm sure she will be very touched by how many people are concerned about her.


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

All I know...and that is very little is she used to be here, whilst at work, never at home. So used access to the internet at work...so if there is a problem at work is why she may not be able to come here..

Hopefully she is sorting her life out..and will be back soon enough.


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

lullabydream said:


> All I know...and that is very little is she used to be here, whilst at work, never at home. So used access to the internet at work...so if there is a problem at work is why she may not be able to come here..
> 
> Hopefully she is sorting her life out..and will be back soon enough.


Yes I think she only ever had internet access at work, I too hope she is ok as I miss my Muttley updates, I hope she is ok and happy.


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

lullabydream said:


> All I know...and that is very little is she used to be here, whilst at work, never at home. So used access to the internet at work...so if there is a problem at work is why she may not be able to come here..
> 
> Hopefully she is sorting her life out..and will be back soon enough.


Good point.


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

When I saw this in the 'new posts' bit I got hopeful thinking @Muttly had posted. 
I too think of her and hope she and Muttly are OK.


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## mrs phas (Apr 6, 2014)

Ive only just caught this for some reason and its answered a couple of queries I had re Muttly and her disappearance
I do hope everything is ok for her and she will, or someone close to her will, post something soon


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## Sairy (Nov 22, 2016)

I miss Muttly too  I did PM her when she first said she wasn't going to be on for a while, but never heard back. I hope she is OK.


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## Nettles (Mar 24, 2011)

Hopefully all that has been getting her down lately will be sorted soon and she'll be back with a happy update for us all.. and some pics of the gorgeous Muttly of course! It's not the same without her.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Hi guys. I really am missing you all loads. 
I was able to log in quickly and was really overwhelmed by the messages of concern and support I've received.

I'm sorry i have worried some of you, things are all coming to a head right now and I'm going through an awful time.
I hope by the end of the month that everything will be ok and I'll be back here daily.
My amazing little Muttly has been there for me all the way and i could not do this without him. He makes me smile with his gorgeous happy face every day and he has also developed a skill of calming my OH when he can see he is getting too worked up! Clever boy

Anyway soon things will be very different for both of us, i just had to be sure before i made that move. 
I can't believe it's been 2 months! These horrible things just consume your life.

Thanks again everyone for the support and sorry to worry you

Love you guys! X


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## mrs phas (Apr 6, 2014)

thanks for the update, I do hope things continue in a positive way to your destination 
sharon x


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## Mirandashell (Jan 10, 2017)




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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

Thank you for updating. 

Good Boy Muttly for being such a big support. 

Thinking of you and hope that things get better for you very soon.

Look forward to seeing you back  *hugs from me and licks and waggy tail from Bungo*


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

So good to hear from you. Love, hugs and licks xxx


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Here's a Muttly pic of him looking very grown up!


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## Mirandashell (Jan 10, 2017)

Oh, he's looking fit!


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## mrs phas (Apr 6, 2014)

you look perfect for cuddling and supporting Mutley, well done for doing your job so well :Kiss


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## LinznMilly (Jun 24, 2011)

Glad to hear from you, @Muttly , although sorry things are still rough. Take care.


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## kimthecat (Aug 11, 2009)

Its good to hear from you . Muttly looks scrumptious.


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## PawsOnMe (Nov 1, 2012)

Thanks for the update, sorry to hear you're going through a hard time, I hope things go the way you want them to and well done Muttly for being such a good help. Hope to see you both back soon xx


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Glad to ar you and Muttly are OK and hope you get sorted soon!


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

I'm sorry you are still having an awful time, I hope things get resolved you for and good on Mutters for looking after after you, you are missed please don't stay away too long.


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## Sairy (Nov 22, 2016)

Thanks for the update - I was thinking about you the other day. Hope everything gets sorted soon. Glad Muttly is looking after you xx


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

Hope things get better soon. Hugs x


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## steveshanks (Feb 19, 2015)

Hope you get everything sorted and get yourself happy soon, give Muttly a hug from me too


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## MaggiesMom (Oct 13, 2016)

Great to hear from you! Hope things seen in the up & you're ok, look forward to another update. Hugs to Mutley too x


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## Matrod (Dec 22, 2014)

Thanks for updating us, we've missed you & looking forward to seeing you back when you're good & ready. What a good boy Mutley is looking after you x


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

I haven't been on for ages. I know things weren't easy for you while I still here. I hope things work out the best for YOU and you do what you need to do, things will be hard at first but I hope it's a start to a happier life for you x Chin up buttercup, only way to go when you hit rock bottom is up x Good luck x


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## fernlady (Feb 27, 2013)

@Muttly we're all here for you when you come back, big hugs x


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

Meezey said:


> I haven't been on for ages. I know things weren't easy for you while I still here. I hope things work out the best for YOU and you do what you need to do, things will be hard at first but I hope it's a start to a happier life for you x Chin up buttercup, only way to go when you hit rock bottom is up x Good luck x


Meezy should know ...Nobody likes you anyway lol I was so happy to see you back though....What does that say about me?

To Muttly.....The most important thing in the world is you.If others love you and ride along with you that is great but people come and go.You need to always take care of you.


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## Siskin (Nov 13, 2012)

Good to get an update and that you and Muttly are ok. Hope everything works out ok, see you soon


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## SixStar (Dec 8, 2009)

I'm sorry to hear things are still so rough. Thinking of you and looking forward to 'seeing' you back here full time soon. Look after yourself.


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## MollySmith (May 7, 2012)

Take care Muttly and stay safe lovely


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## leashedForLife (Nov 1, 2009)

.
very glad to see the update, altho it's still rough times - I hope to see U back soon, @Muttly , & what a good sturdy prop Ur boy has been. 
Well done, pup!
.
.


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## Nettles (Mar 24, 2011)

So sorry to hear things are still tough  Thinking of you and hoping things improve soon. Sending hugs for you and Muttly xo


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

I'm just glad to hear you are mainly ok. Take care x


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks so much guys.
You might see me popping on and off when i can. Tbh your support message s really help at the mo.

Trying to stay strong is hard and fall back to the easy option where everyone else is happy except me.
Trying not to fail.
X


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

You do what's right for you Muttly, what makes you happy is important...

Hugs to you

xxxx


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## foxiesummer (Feb 4, 2009)

Haste ye back.


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

lullabydream said:


> You do what's right for you Muttly, what makes you happy is important...
> 
> Hugs to you
> 
> xxxx


Agree. Doing something that pleases someone else but makes you unhappy long term is no way to live your life and ultimately makes everyone unhappy. Be strong and brave and follow your heart.


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Muttly said:


> Thanks so much guys.
> You might see me popping on and off when i can. Tbh your support message s really help at the mo.
> 
> Trying to stay strong is hard and fall back to the easy option where everyone else is happy except me.
> ...


Nope, no, nadda you're definitely not going to do that. Stay strong Mrs x


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## Mum2Heidi (Feb 17, 2010)

I think of you often. Miss your posts and little man.
Take good care of yourself,stay strong and determined.
You only have one life so make sure you do what's best for you.


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## Magyarmum (Apr 27, 2015)

We've missed you Muttly and hope it won't be long before you're back. 

Hugs from us all in Hungary XXXX


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

The bravest and scariest thing you could ever do is stand on your own two feet and proudly say it is my time.It is my time to be happy and shed myself of all the things that make me unhappy.It is my time to shed myself of all the things that drag me down.It is my time to treat my self with respect and dignity and make myself happy when no one else around me will.

When this is done you will come out the other side with a whole new outlook on life and be free.

Some might say this is selfish but this is the one thing that needs to happen for anyone to be happy in their own life.If you are not happy in your own life you will never be happy in someone elses


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Rott lover said:


> The bravest and scariest thing you could ever do is stand on your own two feet and proudly say it is my time.It is my time to be happy and shed myself of all the things that make me unhappy.It is my time to shed myself of all the things that drag me down.It is my time to treat my self with respect and dignity and make myself happy when no one else around me will.
> 
> When this is done you will come out the other side with a whole new outlook on life and be free.
> 
> Some might say this is selfish but this is the one thing that needs to happen for anyone to be happy in their own life.If you are not happy in your own life you will never be happy in someone elses


I worry so much about this decision being selfish. Been told i should be happy with what i have.

I just feel at this point in life i need to be on my own (as far a humans are concerned) and go for what i want to do with my life.
I can never do what i want to staying here and have been told i show many signs of depression right now.


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

Muttly said:


> I worry so much about this decision being selfish. Been told i should be happy with what i have.
> 
> I just feel at this point in life i need to be on my own (as far a humans are concerned) and go for what i want to do with my life.
> I can never do what i want to staying here and have been told i show many signs of depression right now.


If this decision is to make yourself better and no one is supporting it then they are the ones being selfish and dont deserve you.Who is saying your depressed ?all the same ones trying to depress you?Rise up and make your path that makes you happy


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

You are stuck in a rutt of life and need to escape it.I know it is scary but you have to listen to what your heart says.When you are in a successful relationship the people around you should be supportive of what ever you want to do.I have supported my wife even if i thought she was crazy and vise versa.If she does tell me no it is for good reason but she fallows the no up with logical reasons and makes me see the sense i didnt first see.If you have no support then there is no reason to stay and in my opinion you should move on and you will be much better off in the long run.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Just a pic of Muttly being more his usual self lol
Playing with some stray sheep wool


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks RL. I know that makes sense. So hard though.


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Muttly said:


> Thanks RL. I know that makes sense. So hard though.


You have lots of people here who will support you


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## Gemmaa (Jul 19, 2009)

Muttly said:


> I worry so much about this decision being selfish. *Been told i should be happy with what i have.*


Balls to that! 
It's your life and you have to do what's right for *you.
*
We're all rooting for you 
x


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

Muttly said:


> I worry so much about this decision being selfish. Been told i should be happy with what i have.


No one can tell you what makes you happy. Only you can decide that. Go with what feels right for you not with what people who may have vested interests in your decision say is right. If the two coincide then then that's great but if not follow your own instincts. It takes courage and strength to take your own path but believe in your self that you are capable of doing what's best for you.

I know it's scary making a change, and the path ahead may not be easy but staying where you are because it is easier will likely lead to regret and missed opportunities later. Hugs x


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

I am on your side with this as are many many other people and i know i dont have a clue as to what you are going through or what is happening but i do know that no matter what you deserve to be happy.That doesnt go for just you that goes for every one.I was stuck in a situation where i was being dragged down by another person and it was affecting my mental health and the relationships with the other people around me that i really did care about and them about me.It took a lot to just up and walk away and i was left with a lot of whys and what ifs and if i had done this or that.It took me a long time to get over it but it really did make a huge difference for the better.


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

I think it's all to easy to take the road of least resistance but this will only lead to unhappiness for you, you can't quash your happiness and wellbeing for others around you and they will never truly be happy if you are having to sacrifice yourself for them. I love Muttley attacking the wool, please tell me he was making little 'grrr' noise too as that would just be perfect


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## The Wild Bunch (Jul 16, 2014)

@Muttly been there, done that. Stayed in a toxic relationship because "I wouldn't find anyone better" eventually I found the courage to leave, saw my GP and got the correct help and tons of support from my family. Fast forward 10 years and I have an amazing husband, two wonderful kids and an (almost) perfect life. Self preservation has to kick in sometimes sweetheart and you have to do what is right for you (and muttly) big hugs x


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Muttly said:


> I worry so much about this decision being selfish. Been told i should be happy with what i have.
> 
> I just feel at this point in life i need to be on my own (as far a humans are concerned) and go for what i want to do with my life.
> I can never do what i want to staying here and have been told i show many signs of depression right now.


This is your answer, read it often. Hugs x


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## benfalkner11 (May 5, 2017)

I hope Muttly is fine now.


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## Aahlly (Sep 12, 2014)

Muttly said:


> I worry so much about this decision being selfish. Been told i should be happy with what i have.
> 
> I just feel at this point in life i need to be on my own (as far a humans are concerned) and go for what i want to do with my life.
> I can never do what i want to staying here and have been told i show many signs of depression right now.


It's so good to see you back here, even if only briefly.

There are times in life when we have to be selfish. You'll know in your heart what the right thing for you is and if that means that other people are unhappy with your decision then sadly, that's life sometimes. We cannot live our lives to please other people. That's unhealthy and toxic and if it is making you ill then you know that it is not the right thing for you to be doing. The right thing to do can be the hardest thing to do and it can be difficult to take that step forward, but in the long run, this rough time will be a small price to pay for a happier, healthier life which you deserve.

People telling you that you should be happy with what you have is a manipulation and just not true. There's no "should" in this situation. You need to do what's right for _you_, not what other people tell you is right.

We're all rooting for you here and looking forward to having you back full time when things settle down. Thinking of you x


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## winterrose (Dec 30, 2016)

Just remember to stay strong. You won't fall - we're all here for you, and we will always be here when you need us. Even if only briefly, I'm happy that you returned and can't wait for you to come back.
Whatever happens, you can get through this. 
Big hugs. X


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## applecrumlin (Mar 8, 2015)

My niece has a tattoo that reads,
"Your life is your own. 
Rise up and live it."

Remember always to treat yourself with the respect and care that you show Goldie, and you won't go far wrong. You've told us on here that you took him out of a very compromised life, and you can improve things for yourself too.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Meezey said:


> You have lots of people here who will support you


Thanks Meezey and it's good to see you back


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

MontyMaude said:


> I think it's all to easy to take the road of least resistance but this will only lead to unhappiness for you, you can't quash your happiness and wellbeing for others around you and they will never truly be happy if you are having to sacrifice yourself for them. I love Muttley attacking the wool, please tell me he was making little 'grrr' noise too as that would just be perfect


Yes he was lol
This little love makes such a huge difference to my life and i am sure he is the reason i haven't broken down and given up.


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

You need to treat yourself and stand up for yourself and your happiness and wellbeing like you do for Muttley, plus he lucky to have such a caring Mum as you looking out for him.


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

Remember

You are stronger then you think. 

However tempting it is don't choose the easy route, you have so many people willing you to take the leap, it will result in a happier you and you deserve that. 

And you have Muttly and us by your side, we won't let you fall. 

*HUGS*


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks guys. I must admit one of my biggest worries is earning enough money to pay for a house for me and Muttly, but at the same time without leaving him all day as i know he will stress at least to start with.
I have ideas and plans for what i can do, it's just hoping and praying and being lucky it falls into place!


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## Mum2Heidi (Feb 17, 2010)

I have "liked" just about everyone's post. So much good advice which says all I ever could.
As for earning enough money, house, leaving Muttly etc. Take one step at a time and don't pile the hurdles up in front of you. I know it's easier said than done but you will conquer each one as they come along. Small steps. Imagine you have blinkers and can only see "now". 
There is a wonderful life waiting for you around the corner. Believe it and go get it ! 
You and Muttley deserve it.


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Muttly said:


> Thanks guys. I must admit one of my biggest worries is earning enough money to pay for a house for me and Muttly, but at the same time without leaving him all day as i know he will stress at least to start with.
> I have ideas and plans for what i can do, it's just hoping and praying and being lucky it falls into place!


He'll cope, he'll adapt, he'll be just fine. Do not stay unhappy to make your dog happy darling, please. Just get on with things and I promise you Muttly wont be half as bothered as you are or think he will be.
I know its hard, I did it. Its the hardest thing ever, but then one day its the best thing ever.


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## applecrumlin (Mar 8, 2015)

Don't forget that Muttly is a confident and secure little trooper now, he'll cope far better if you do have to leave him now, than when you first met him.

About two years ago, a friend wondered if I would look after her dog if anything happened to her. I replied that because of working full time and living alone, I wouldn't have gone out looking for a dog, but that particular one ticked all my boxes and if he needed a home, I'd MAKE it work. That got me thinking, and it wasn't long before I got Monkey (who by the way is Muttly's double.....from certain angles!)

The point is, we all have faith that YOU can make things work the way that they need to, to meet yours and Muttly's needs.


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

As the old saying goes... how do you eat an elephant.... one bite at a time (only imaginary elephants were eaten in this scenario)

Don't feel you have to figure out everything at once. Muttley will be fine and as others have said don't take the easy route just because the way forward seems overwhelming. Remember just one bite at a time


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## leashedForLife (Nov 1, 2009)

kittih said,

_As the old saying goes, *how do you eat an elephant?... one bite at a time* (only imaginary elephants were eaten in this scenario)
..._
_____________________________
.
.
How do U eat a pound of grapes? ... One after another.  [actual grapes were eaten in this scenario.] 
.
.
.


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## kittih (Jan 19, 2014)

leashedForLife said:


> kittih said,
> 
> _As the old saying goes, *how do you eat an elephant?... one bite at a time* (only imaginary elephants were eaten in this scenario)
> ..._
> ...


Haha. You are very restrained. I can fit more than one grape in my mouth at a time. 

OK Muttley just eat one mouthful of elephant and a grape to follow at a time. The moral of the story is don't try and eat a bunch of elephants or a herd of grapes in one go. And I hope that silliness has cheered you up a little


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Haha you did make me smile.
Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Muttly said:


> Haha you did make me smile.
> Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
> We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


And actually, that is ok. It takes strength to admit "this doesn't work" it takes epic strength to do something about it. In the long run EVERYONE is happier, which is what you need to hold on to.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Muttly said:


> Haha you did make me smile.
> Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
> We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


No, you aren't. You have tried & that's something.

No one person can be the buttress for other people all their lives, it destroys you.

We're all here for you, take care xx


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Lexiedhb said:


> He'll cope, he'll adapt, he'll be just fine. Do not stay unhappy to make your dog happy darling, please. Just get on with things and I promise you Muttly wont be half as bothered as you are or think he will be.
> I know its hard, I did it. Its the hardest thing ever, but then one day its the best thing ever.


Tbh from all that you have shared in the past, I suspect if he could talk Muttly would be shouting "GET YOUR COAT MUM, WE'RE LEAVING!"


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Muttly said:


> Haha you did make me smile.
> Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
> We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


Why be miserable together, when you might all be happy apart?


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## Gemmaa (Jul 19, 2009)

.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks for sharing that Gemma. Kinda makes me think as of course I'm not related to oh or his kid, so no tie like a relative.
I genuinely do want him to find happiness with someone who wants all that and the kid etc. . 
What i will never do again is try something I'm not happy about, because the moment i agreed to his kid living here was my biggest mistake and it's like I'm being punished for trying to be a good person and not leave when he needed me. Now it so much worse as we are 5 years on and i still cant make it work. But apparently i haven't tried.
It's break time and it's either me that breaks or the family breaks up.


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## Charity (Apr 17, 2013)

Have only just read this thread right through and am sorry @Muttly you are going through so much. I've had a couple of very low points in my life which have been so unbearable at the time but I've found that no matter how awful things get, they do come to an end and the sun comes out again though it may not seem so at the moment.


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## Bisbow (Feb 20, 2012)

I so sorry you are having a bad time
Try to do what makes you happy, it is your life and you deserve to be happy

I have missed seeing the lovely Muttlly pics, he is such a lovely fellow and I am pleased he is helping you out

Take great care of yourself and him and hope you will be back soon, a happier and more content person


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## MontyMaude (Feb 23, 2012)

Muttly said:


> Thanks for sharing that Gemma. Kinda makes me think as of course I'm not related to oh or his kid, so no tie like a relative.
> I genuinely do want him to find happiness with someone who wants all that and the kid etc. .
> What i will never do again is try something I'm not happy about, because the moment i agreed to his kid living here was my biggest mistake and it's like I'm being punished for trying to be a good person and not leave when he needed me. Now it so much worse as we are 5 years on and i still cant make it work. But apparently i haven't tried.
> It's break time and it's either me that breaks or the family breaks up.


You have tried for 5 years to make it work, and that is more than most would, it's not what you wanted but you have tried, and you OH should be grateful and understanding that you have tried when it's not something you wanted or asked for, and guilt tripping you into staying is incredibly unfair on both you and his daughter.


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## Blaise in Surrey (Jun 10, 2014)

Don't tend to say much on this thread, as I don't know you, and there can be such a thing as too much advice  I had a similar situation almost twenty years ago, with the added complication of being in fear for my life.... Making the break, even when I couldn't see the future, was the best thing I have ever done. 

One day at a time....


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## MiffyMoo (Sep 15, 2015)

I'm so proud of you for finally looking out for yourself. It's a dreadful, heartbreaking decision to make, but once you and Muttly are on your own, you'll feel such a huge weight lifted off you


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## Bob Ford (Apr 17, 2017)

Wow I know I'm a lucky guy but until I read your situation Muttely I didn't realise just how lucky I have I guess my life partner for almost 35yrs we still hold hands, kiss & hug in public so that's why I feel so lucky, I have depression & my wife is & has been my rock. I guess my point is there is someone that is right for you & you will be right for them. Relationships have to be worked at but there's also the saying "flogging a dead horse" I wish you all the strength you need to find that happy place you so deserve do what you need to do for your own sanity. Sending big hugs from me & licks from Pickle.


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## MollySmith (May 7, 2012)

Muttly said:


> Haha you did make me smile.
> Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
> We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


We spoke a while ago about challenges and I don't think you can be a failure if you have tried. You gave it what you could and someone has to be the person with the balls to say I'm leaving or I'm going to do 'this'. It takes so much courage.

You're bound to be worried about Muttly and how he'll manage. I put off leaving my ex for too long and doing so can affect confidence and illuminate worries that can be solved. Dogs do cope and there are so many resources, you never know you may end up near a PF'er who can help out or we can recommend a resource. Those things have a habit of falling into place.

Take care lovely


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## Meezey (Jan 29, 2013)

Muttly said:


> Haha you did make me smile.
> Another awful night and tbh what is giving me more of a push is seeing my OH so sad and i cant continue to stay where everyone is sad.
> We are clearly a failed attempt at a family.


Hey no one failed, don't think like that. Life is a fecker and sometimes things don't work, for what ever reason they don't, nothing failed, it just wasn't right. You can't fail putting a round peg in a square hole because it was never meant to fit.

Life is way way to short to be anything but happy. X


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## Bob Ford (Apr 17, 2017)

•Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak; sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go. ~Author Unknown​Seems appropriate!


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## Rott lover (Jan 2, 2015)

its been a few days i hope everything is ok


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## westie~ma (Mar 16, 2009)

Thinking of you Lovely x


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## MaggiesMom (Oct 13, 2016)

I think you've done more than most hun, time to focus on you.

My dance teacher once told me 'The come back is greater than the setback'. So true. Big hugs xx


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Hi guys, sorry it's been ages again. I'm still there, but just holding onto a thread. There are ups and downs, but more downs.
So I expect everyone is a bit bored of this, sorry.

So on the upside me and Muttly went to Dogfest Knebworth last weekend 
We had a great time and got loooads of treats lol. It was such a lovely day out just me, my mum and dad and our dogs. I really needed it. There are some pics somewhere.


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## MilleD (Feb 15, 2016)

I'm not bored of it.

Glad to hear you are ok, even if it's only just.

Sounds like you had a lovely day out. Here's hoping there are lots more to come x


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

Yes, good to hear from you. Hang in there, update us when you can and give young Muttly a big hug from me and Timber. And virtual hugs to you too ((()))


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## Honeys mum (Jan 11, 2013)

Glad to hear you and Muttly are O.K., and that you had a lovely weekend out.

Hope evrything goes well for you.Take care.x


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Thanks guys 
Here's a couple of pics. It's been stupidly hot and Muttly did not like it.








We have been spending time at our favourite lake where he loves to retrieve sticks and then snuffle in the sand, the result is this:








and a nice one of Muttly and my parents Goldens 








For some reason Muttly is doing a Fruitbat impression


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## SixStar (Dec 8, 2009)

We were at Dogfest on Saturday too, would have loved to said hello and got a cuddle with Muttly. Maybe you saw my two bears? They spent the majority of the day wallowing in the little bone shaped paddling pools with my husband (he wasn't doing any wallowing you'll be pleased to hear!) whilst I done the shopping.

Glad you're doing ok. Stay strong.


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## MiffyMoo (Sep 15, 2015)

Muttly said:


> Hi guys, sorry it's been ages again. I'm still there, but just holding onto a thread. There are ups and downs, but more downs.
> So I expect everyone is a bit bored of this, sorry.
> 
> So on the upside me and Muttly went to Dogfest Knebworth last weekend
> We had a great time and got loooads of treats lol. It was such a lovely day out just me, my mum and dad and our dogs. I really needed it. There are some pics somewhere.


You're baaack! Don't worry, you're not boring us; we care about you guys a lot, so are more than happy to be your sounding board and remote support system


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

SixStar said:


> We were at Dogfest on Saturday too, would have loved to said hello and got a cuddle with Muttly. Maybe you saw my two bears? They spent the majority of the day wallowing in the little bone shaped paddling pools with my husband (he wasn't doing any wallowing you'll be pleased to hear!) whilst I done the shopping.
> 
> Glad you're doing ok. Stay strong.


Oh bugger, what a shame I didn't think to come on here first. I would have loved to have said hello and had big bear cuddles. I do recall a few Newfies there, one was very tall in particular and I pointed him out to my Mum. 
Oh the pools were a god send. Although I also kept Muttly cool by sticking him in the buckets too lol. He just stood there like Ahhhh, cooling his paws.


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## mrs phas (Apr 6, 2014)

Muttly said:


> So on the upside me and Muttly went to Dogfest Knebworth last weekend
> We had a great time and got loooads of treats lol. It was such a lovely day out just me, my mum and dad and our dogs. I really needed it. There are some pics somewhere.


Glad you all had a good day
nothing like a bit of company and sunshine to create a few smiles, even in the darkest of times xx


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## Sairy (Nov 22, 2016)

Lovely to hear from you. Hope things get better soon xxx


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

Good to hear from you and see Muttly pictures 

Hang in there.


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## Kimmikins (Apr 9, 2016)

Good to hear from you! I bet Dogfest was amazing, I would've loved to take Scrumpy but it has been much too hot for him lately and he can't cope with it. Did you buy far too many things?

Hang in there, we're all cheering you on xx


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## shirleystarr (Mar 22, 2009)

Just seen this thread I am sorry you are going through a rough time and hope things work out for you and the lovely boy I never get tired of looking at pictures of him


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## Matrod (Dec 22, 2014)

Lovely to hear from you & see pics of the handsome boy  xx


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## SixStar (Dec 8, 2009)

Muttly said:


> Oh bugger, what a shame I didn't think to come on here first. I would have loved to have said hello and had big bear cuddles. I do recall a few Newfies there, one was very tall in particular and I pointed him out to my Mum.
> Oh the pools were a god send. Although I also kept Muttly cool by sticking him in the buckets too lol. He just stood there like Ahhhh, cooling his paws.


Maybe next year eh 

Very tall Newfie could have been Oz  He's well over breed standard and not as heavy in bone & coat as most.

Harvey (Bernese) pranced back to the car with a giant stuffed pink octopus in his mouth. He slobbered on it so I felt obliged to buy it, then he insisted on carrying it.

I didn't spot Muttly, feel certain I would have recognised him - but then it was so busy!


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## fernlady (Feb 27, 2013)

Good to hear from you @Muttly x


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## leashedForLife (Nov 1, 2009)

.
.
Miss U, lovey - nice to hear from U, & Muttly looks champ. // Don't worry about boring us, heavens! - just say hi when U can, & we're thinking of ya.
hugs & pats,
- terry
.
.
.


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## Team_Trouble (Apr 11, 2016)

Love,y to hear from you and see the gorgeous Muttly pics. He is looking super handsome :Happy keep on going xxxxxx


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## Lexiedhb (Jun 9, 2011)

Hey muttly's mum. How's it going? Are you making progress? 
It's great to just take some time out for you, recharge and relax.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

SixStar said:


> Maybe next year eh
> 
> Very tall Newfie could have been Oz  He's well over breed standard and not as heavy in bone & coat as most.
> 
> ...


Yeah you would have known if you had seen Muttly, he's pretty unique and he has an orange harness  But then he's also very small to spot in crowds.
Aw I would say that was Oz then, it was a nice slim newfie and his coat wasn't as heavy yeah, gorgeous. how funny, he was the one I pointed out! 
Oh bless Harvey! very sweet.

They mentioned next year being in the South West, which is near my parents. I;m thinking of going both days as I didn;t get to do everything this year or last!


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Lexiedhb said:


> Hey muttly's mum. How's it going? Are you making progress?
> It's great to just take some time out for you, recharge and relax.


I'm doing ok and not really, so up and down. I am still trying to find that courage 
DogFest was a great escape, but made going home all that worse.....


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

Muttly said:


> I'm doing ok and not really, so up and down. I am still trying to find that courage
> DogFest was a great escape, but made going home all that worse.....


Sorry things aren't great. Just look after you and Muttly. And the fear of something is often worse than facing the thing itself.


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## new westie owner (Apr 30, 2010)

Nice to hear from you muttly looks well and your parents goldens are beautiful


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

Muttly said:


> I'm doing ok and not really, so up and down. I am still trying to find that courage
> DogFest was a great escape, but made going home all that worse.....


Maybe you need to remember how going home feels and use that to give you the courage for the next step.

We are all here for you and Bungo sends you licks and a hug from me.


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Piccies


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## Bisbow (Feb 20, 2012)

That dog has such a lovely little face and looks like he knows all there is to know


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## PawsOnMe (Nov 1, 2012)

Aww lovely photos, he's such a cutie pie :Happy

Sorry to hear things are still tough for you, take care of yourself x


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## MaggiesMom (Oct 13, 2016)

Hey! lovely to hear from you, we were at dogfest on the saturday too! It was a fab day, we were knackered by about 2.30pm though! We got right to the front of the dog walk with Noel and he called Maggie pretty!
Shame I didn't spot you but I guess I wasn't looking lol.
Hope you're ok, good to see you checking in xx


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

MaggiesMom said:


> Hey! lovely to hear from you, we were at dogfest on the saturday too! It was a fab day, we were knackered by about 2.30pm though! We got right to the front of the dog walk with Noel and he called Maggie pretty!
> Shame I didn't spot you but I guess I wasn't looking lol.
> Hope you're ok, good to see you checking in xx


No way! Oh it would have been good to meet you and for Muttly and Maggie to meet!


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

Bisbow said:


> That dog has such a lovely little face and looks like he knows all there is to know


Aww, I love that description


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## Muttly (Oct 1, 2014)

We have signed up for Agility 
A week Tuesday (as next Tues is my birthday), that's tiddler night so we have to go on that day.

I can't wait!!!!


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## DaisyBluebell (Apr 14, 2017)

Muttly said:


> We have signed up for Agility
> A week Tuesday (as next Tues is my birthday), that's tiddler night so we have to go on that day.
> 
> I can't wait!!!!


Brilliant, it will sure keep you both fit  Have a very happy birthday.


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