# How do you deal with it?



## Garp (May 31, 2008)

Our fantastic little Indy, our loved family member, we had to make that choice and have her taken from us, how the hell do you deal with that? how can you take someone you loved so dearly to that place knowing that she will never come home with you again? WHY only 9 years old, suddenly taken to ill to carry on WHY

We cry but will never forget her, she was our light our joy but no more here with us in body but always in heart.

Indy we miss you and always love you.


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## carol (Nov 2, 2007)

sorry about your loss
its very hard decide whats best, but its for the best for the dog thats the main thing and you will always have her in your hearts


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## tashi (Dec 5, 2007)

So sorry to hear of your loss it is sad when they go to 'Rainbow Bridge' never an easy thing to say goodbye and they are never on this earth long enough!!!

Rest assured she is in a lovely place now and is running free with all the other animals that have been taken for us far too early.

Your sadness comes through in your post just think on the good times and there must have been lots of those, focus on those and keep those memories close.

RIP little Indy run free at the Bridge


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## andyjakeydan (Apr 27, 2008)

i wish i could tell you how to deal with it but i can't.......you have to hope that one day you'll be with her again........i'm still torn to shreds inside a month after i had to have my boy put down.....she'll live forever in your hearts...


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## jeanie (Nov 11, 2007)

Im so very sorry , i wish i could help take your pain away, she will always be in your heart, i really feel for you and family after going through it myself, bless her, play happy at rainbow bridge.


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## sskmick (Feb 4, 2008)

I am really sorry for your loss. She was a beautiful little girl.

Sue


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## Guest (May 31, 2008)

I dont deal with this sort of things...I am crying my eyes out....


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## sskmick (Feb 4, 2008)

Garp said:


> Our fantastic little Indy, our loved family member, we had to make that choice and have her taken from us, how the hell do you deal with that? how can you take someone you loved so dearly to that place knowing that she will never come home with you again? WHY only 9 years old, suddenly taken to ill to carry on WHY
> 
> We cry but will never forget her, she was our light our joy but no more here with us in body but always in heart.
> 
> Indy we miss you and always love you.


I so want to give you an answer but I can't we all deal with it differently. "How do I deal with it." I wear my feelings on my cuff, ball my eyes out, talk, and talk about him (I've mainly had males). At first I beat myself up inside, what if..., why didn't I..., should I have... etc etc.

Whilst life goes on it isn't a closed chapter in your life she will become a fond memory, and you will remember the happy times but that takes time and believe me there will still be times in the future when you will have moments of upset.

Sue


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## Smudgeypants (Mar 21, 2008)

sorry for your loss,,,


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## Debbie (Nov 10, 2007)

R.I.P Indy

So sorry for your loss


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## catzndogz (Mar 12, 2008)

so sorry for the loss of your beautiful little girl Indy. it's never easy to make that decision i had to make it this time last year with my dog lady. i think of her everyday and shed a tear each time. i think of all the good times that we had togther. i know that now she will be running freely over rainbow bridge.
i know Indy will be with you all the time. hugs being sent to you and your family. RIP ....... Indy


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## Siamese Kelly (Jan 6, 2008)

Oh Garp-so sorry your heart is broken she was a beautiful looking lady and your right she is with you always


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## Garp (May 31, 2008)

Thank you all so much for your kind words.
The hardest thing we had to do was clear away her bed and toys, we could not throw them away so we boxed them up and store them, silly I know but we just could not bring ourselves to dispose of them.

We miss the tail wag when we come home and the way she run up the hall when the post comes, we miss a lot but will never forget.

Thank you again.
Vince & Tina


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## Tom_1 (Jun 2, 2008)

I know what you mean about the bed and toys, my dog was put down on Sunday and there is still his stuff all around.
The way I'm thinking is that wherever he is now I'm sure he has got all his favourite things with him all the time, your dog will be the same and will be having fun wherever she is.

I hope you can feel better about your loss soon and just remember the good times.


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## grooveman (Jun 4, 2008)

I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I could offer some helpful advice but it is just one of those things that will heal over time. I dearly love my two mutts and have always had strong bonds to all my "kids" and it is the most painful and heart wrenching thing in the world to have to part with them. 
The only bad thing about dogs is that they dont live long enough.


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## mybaby (May 29, 2008)

Debbie said:


> R.I.P Indy
> 
> So sorry for your loss


"A loss is regretful...a memory eternal" author unknown.
I wrote a poem whilst I was in destruction mode,after losing an animal who had become my best friend.It is too long to place here,but if you want to e-mail me,at [email protected] I will send it to you.It may help.


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## Mese (Jun 5, 2008)

Im sorry for your loss hun    

We lost our beloved Buddy in April , I still cry cos I miss him so much , its hard without him ... but now I think of him and sometimes I dont cry , most times I do , but it helps to know that he's happier at the bridge and I will see him again 

Just give it time sweetie , the pain will ease *hugs*


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## cav (May 23, 2008)

sorry for your loss


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## silly gilly (Apr 7, 2008)

So sorry for your loss, its the last kind thing you can do for them when you have no options which you obviously didnt. You have to go through the grieving process, its a measure of how much you loved her and I know in time you will be able to think of her and smile for the pleasure you shared. Thinking of you.


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## prowebd (Jun 17, 2008)

They become too special, they become too much a part of our lives, and for us they became our babies - and losing them became a huge, huge pain. We try to reassure ourselves that we gave them a good and long life and that they only left us when we could do no more for them - however we constantly question 'could we have done more?' We try to take solice from what we gave them, but we also query should we have done more - we will never know, however we pray that one day we will meet again at rainbow bridge and be reunited. Until we meet again - Minty, Minstrel & Sukie - we love you.


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## binxycat (Mar 15, 2008)

What a lovely little lady, bless her
Take care


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## Methical (Jul 11, 2008)

I apologise now that i will not be stating how sorry i am for your loss ect ect as the subject of your post is "How do you deal with it?" Therefore my reply will attempt to give you some insight in how I deal with such things.

I have not owned a dog before i now have a 1 Year old black Lab called Daisy with any luck my time of 'coming to terms' with her death is far away.

I am not however talking to you from inexperience. In my life i have had 4 cats, 2 hamsters, about 9 fish (but they count as 1 pet collectively i say), 1 snake, 2 ducks and a Sugar Glider (look 'em up on youtube). None of the above our in this world today so I have had experience with death of a loved pet.

Id like to think i am quite a sensitive person and as a result the death of the first few beloved animals hit me really hard, almost on par with the death of a human family member....almost. After the first few times i decided it was certainly time to come up with some way of dulling the pain.

So my advice to you is this. Look at the purchase of your pet differently. I have got Daisy with the strong view that I have bought a dog to make my life more enjoyable. I have not bought Daisy to make it better, i have bought a DOG. This is not to say i will pay her less love and attention as it seems especially with dogs the more love and attention you put in, the better dog you get out. But this is not like a child, everything you do must be selfish, you feed her not so that she will not be hungry but so that you may walk her, you train her not so that she will lead a stable life but so that YOU will enjoy your time with her (or 'it' if you can bring yourself to that level).

This may seem somewhat cold-hearted and to some extent it is but i must stress that there is NO DIFFERENCE in the way you treat your dog, merely the motivation behind it. You still grow to love your pet but when its time here comes to an end, your pain is somewhat dissolved by the thought of simply replacing her/him. Rather than "oh my god im never going to find one like Daisy again" No, you wont, but you never wanted Daisy, you wanted a dog, and there are LOTS of those about.

I hoped this helped and even if you dont agree with any of my statements i hope you find comfort in the fact that with enough careful and critical thought the human mind may be trained to handle even the more painful stimuli.

Please do not hesitate to private message me with any further questions.

*DO* however hesitate to private message me your critisisms of this post, that is what 'reply to thread' is for. It works for me and it eliminates the months of mourning after loosing a loved pet.


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## warmglo (Feb 25, 2008)

God Bless her - she's gorgeous. There are a lot of people here who know exactly what that pain is like - myself included. I lost my Tag just two weeks ago and even now the tears are flowing (can anyone explain why it actually physically hurts so much?). I am trying very hard to put all thoughts of why he had to die out of my mind, I don't want those nightmares for the rest of my life. Instead I tell myself that I was there for him. I soothed away his fear. I relieved him of his pain, and he fell asleep peacefully in my arms. He didn't know he would never wake up. He just fell asleep. Just over a week later I adopted another dog. It's a long story that I won't bore you with, but I needed a lively mutt around me, and he needed a home. It is an excellent distraction, and I already love this little guy. That's how I am dealing with it. Oh, and I got blind drunk, blubbered forcefully, smashed a few plates etc, but I dont remember that bit...

((((Big Hug))))


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## prowebd (Jun 17, 2008)

You are so right - it hurts like hell, not just weeks later but months later. Unlike our Methical friend that would choose us to compartmentalise the loss of an animal friend as just another event in life - those of us with a preponderance for compassion see it as a painful experience.

In fact I see it as the loss of a companion in my life - my baby shared so many of my life experiencies with me that I really do hurt that she can no longer share with my life - almost to the extent that my life is worthless without her.

Be selfshish my methical friend - watch the rest of us enjoy compassion, nature, life, and sharing our planet with a rich environment of animal life that we may never fully appreciate.

Do not hurt when you, as we, loose a special companion - do not cry, remain strong, do not show any compassion, die alone.

My Best Regards


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## snowey (Apr 18, 2008)

Im sorry for your loss.
Having been there - I know the pain and how you feel. What if we had done this or did that sooner. You still hear them and feel them near. 
Months pass, and like a bolt out of the blue - something reminds you of them - but you remember the good times. 

To me - my dogs are daughters and sons, and loved the same as the kids.


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## DiamondHooves (Mar 19, 2008)

im so sorry for your loss i hope in time thing will fill better for you


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## surrvivor (Jul 22, 2008)

it's never easy - esp when the decision to put them down is in our hands.
I've had a friend, who's dog (a 2-mth old havanese) was so ill - she started having seizure every few hours uncontrollably , in a state of coma - she asked me, "is it cruel to put them down?"

I was hurt, but i gathered my strength n I asked her, "Seizure is a tormenting experience. Would you rather him in pain, or you'd rather he sleep peacefully?"

Girl Girl was euthanized later... and we had our shares of tears together.
It was not easy, but with a friend's help - somehow things seem shared - and not so much of a burden.


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## prowebd (Jun 17, 2008)

Maybe sharing our loss helps a little; maybe understanding that others also hold similar regard to the loss of our dear pets also helps a little; but maybe all it is -is shedding our tears together. I for one still shed my tears five and half months after losing my darling baby girl - my life companion of almost nineteen years - the most beautiful tortie feline with a great independant attitude - and I do not deny that I was firmly 'under the dew claw' Quite simply I love her and I miss her so much.


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## Guest (Jul 26, 2008)

You want the honest truth? Basically you don't , you never deal with it, they are snatched away from you and you never forget them, vistit rainbow bridge, and cry your eyes out, she's worth every tear you shread and more besides. Try and bear comfort in the knowledge that she is waiting at RB for you.

I am so sorry to hear of your loss - my thoughts are with you
regards
sue


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## NamaraPets (Jul 20, 2008)

Losing a pet can be more emotional than losing a parent.

They give their love unconditional and after many years of such devotion they are taken from us. Yet we are not permitted the same luxury of grief as with a family member in our society.

We have no big funeral, no family and friends bringing baking around, no time off work to grieve.

Your should allow yourself time to grieve. You should also make a memorial and celebrate your memories. And you should take comfort in knowing she has been set free from her pain.

But there is no simple cure for your pain


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