# Introducing Cats? Help!



## lottiejmoran (Mar 8, 2016)

Hello! This is my first post here 

We have had 2 cats for about 10 years until the younger one sadly passed away due to a disease last year. He was my mother's cat and they adored each other, and my mother still misses him. She wants another cat and it is looking likely we will adopt one soon.

The problem is my other cat. She is about 17 years old (though very spritely - she looks and acts like a kitten still) and is a bit antisocial. She's always been difficult with people and I've never seen her get on with other cats. With our late cat, they kind of ignored each other. They never fought, but she wouldn't like him being near her and would tell him off a lot. I feel that whatever place she had in the house, he would take from her. Since his passing, she has reclaimed a lot of places in the house and has become a much more social, happier cat. She is very vocal now and meows a lot, and will even go to my parents for cuddles which she would never do before. I adore this girl and though I would like another cat, I would hate to see her go back into her shell, especially at the age she is now. It's what's put us off getting another cat for a year, but my mother is still terribly sad without her boy.

I'm wondering what advice you would have for a cat like this, and how we could introduce another cat that she could possibly get on with?

Thanks


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## QOTN (Jan 3, 2014)

It would seem your cat has already answered your question. She has told you she is a much happier cat without having to share her territory and her humans. Some cats are like this and will never be happy living with another cat. It might be kinder to let her enjoy her remaining time without competition.


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## lottiejmoran (Mar 8, 2016)

QOTN said:


> It would seem your cat has already answered your question. She has told you she is a much happier cat without having to share her territory and her humans. Some cats are like this and will never be happy living with another cat. It might be kinder to let her enjoy her remaining time without competition.


Thanks for your response

I would agree, but it is not my decision unfortunately. My mother doesn't particularly like my cat and wants a fussy lap cat. I have defended my cat for quite long but I think we will end up getting another cat anyway. It isn't the best choice, and if I had it my way I wouldn't get another cat, but my parents are in control really.

I just want to know what would be the best way around it, so that she won't be made to be too upset or pushed out if they do decide to get another cat


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## Jackie C (Feb 16, 2016)

It sounds like you've tried this before, but maybe you could approach your mum again and try to explain why getting another cat wouldn't be a good idea. Possibly picking an appropriate time, and starting off with, "We need to talk about the cat."

Other than that, I have no experience in this matter, sorry. x But wishing you luck.


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## lottiejmoran (Mar 8, 2016)

Jackie C said:


> It sounds like you've tried this before, but maybe you could approach your mum again and try to explain why getting another cat wouldn't be a good idea. Possibly picking an appropriate time, and starting off with, "We need to talk about the cat."
> 
> Other than that, I have no experience in this matter, sorry. x But wishing you luck.


It's okay, thank you for your response 

I will probably try again tonight, it's hard for her because she loves cats and she had a very strong bond with her cat, and his life was cut short very suddenly and she still gets emotional about it. She's got her eyes on another cat at the moment already. I would love another cat, I just wouldn't want to upset my girl, or upset the new cat with her antisocialness. I hate seeing my mother so sad, but I would hate to see my girl go into her shell again.


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## Jackie C (Feb 16, 2016)

Have you ever seen "My Cat from Hell"? It's on SKY and other such similar. It's presented by a great guy who is fabulous with cats, and a common problem is introducing new cats. 
This is one of his videos (he has many) on YouTube about introducing cats:




This may help.


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## lottiejmoran (Mar 8, 2016)

Jackie C said:


> Have you ever seen "My Cat from Hell"? It's on SKY and other such similar. It's presented by a great guy who is fabulous with cats, and a common problem is introducing new cats.
> This is one of his videos (he has many) on YouTube about introducing cats:
> 
> 
> ...


I've seen the show a couple of times but wasn't aware of this channel! Thank you so much!


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## moggie14 (Sep 11, 2013)

No definately no more cats. Your 17 year old does not like other felines and deserves to live out her retirement in comfort without the bother of an annoying kitten.


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## lottiejmoran (Mar 8, 2016)

moggie14 said:


> No definately no more cats. Your 17 year old does not like other felines and deserves to live out her retirement in comfort without the bother of an annoying kitten.


Unfortunately, it is not my decision. I tried to talk about it with my mother and she was very upset, she needs a cat to help her get over her last cat. I'm not entirely happy about it, while I'd love to have another cat I love my girl and put her as a priority, but it is not my decision to make. Fortunately, we would be adopting a cat, not a kitten. I just want to know that in this situation how I can make my girl as comfortable and happy as possible, not whether to get a cat or not as I know what the right answer would be and unfortunately that is not the answer that will occur.


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## Jackie C (Feb 16, 2016)

An older cat would be better. Maybe you could get a senior one? It's obviously not the ideal solution, but if your mum is so insistent. How big is your house? Is it possible to do the site-swapping thing that Jackson Galaxy talks about?


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## Ragdollsfriend (Feb 13, 2014)

There's already lots of good information about cat introductions in the other section called Training and Behaviour. Perhaps our lovely moderators can move it there.
@lymorelynn Can you help?


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## MilleD (Feb 15, 2016)

lottiejmoran said:


> Thanks for your response
> 
> I would agree, but it is not my decision unfortunately. My mother doesn't particularly like my cat and wants a fussy lap cat.


I'm not sure you could guarantee any cat you got would be a lap cat though.

I have a rescue that they said liked to sit on your knee, but she only does it very rarely and very much under her own terms.

The another cat I have had from being a tiny kitten who used to bounce all over you now prefers to snooze in an upstairs room away from the activity.

Even if you get one that is fairly sure to have been a fussy lap cat, as soon as you introduce it into a new environment with a new cat, that could all change.


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