# Help, My Kitten Dosn't Like Me :(



## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

hey all

i bought a bengal kitten (not pure) 3 weeks ago
for the first two weeks it stayed at my girlfriends as my house wasnt ready for it and i had to go away for one of the weekends.

for the last week it has been at mine, but it just dosnt seem to like me
if i pick her up and put her on my lap, she will just jump off and sit on my girlfriends lap instead

she wont sleep with me at night, instead she cuddles up to my girlfriend.
the only thing she will do with me is play, but still again only if im the only one willing to play with her

i do all the looking after her and she dosnt even like me, its quite frustrating tbh

any advice would be much appreciated

thanks
richy


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## NicoleW (Aug 28, 2010)

How old was the kitten when you got her?

Think about it from her point.

She got taken away from her mum and put into this other house, she bonded with the person there and started to settle when she got taken to another house and now she's scared, the one thing in the new place that is still the same is your girlfriend which is probably why she's sticking with her.

Don't force her onto your knee/lap, let her explore, let her become comfortable with you and then she'll start trusting you and will let you pet her


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## ChinaBlue (Feb 3, 2008)

Good advice above. Persevere - don't try to rush her, does she enjoy being groomed - use a soft brush and perhaps when she is a little quieter, just falling asleep, just brush her gently around the faces (particularly around the whiskers). Carry on playing with her and feeding her. To a large extent she has only been with you a week - and building any bond usually takes some time. I do think it is only right and proper that you post a photo of your kitten


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## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

Roxie was 9 weeks when i got her, she is 12 weeks now

yeah i get what you guys are saying
and thanks for the advice
i shall let her come to me then


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

Was it her mum or dad that was Bengal


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## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

gloworm*mushroom said:


> Was it her mum or dad that was Bengal


her mom was full bengal
her dad was 3/4 bengal (one of his parents was full and the other was half)


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

Are you sure? I mean, she's black  lol


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## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

gloworm*mushroom said:


> Are you sure? I mean, she's black  lol


im sure, what does her color have to do with it?


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

Well, most Bengals have strong distinct tabby markings:

google image bengal - Google Search

I know black isnt an accepted Bengal colour, although they do occasionally occur... The brown is dominant though so it is unlikely to get a black Bengal from the Bengal parentage you describe.

I hope you didnt pay a pedigree price  What did mum/dad look like?


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## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

gloworm*mushroom said:


> Well, most Bengals have strong distinct tabby markings:
> 
> google image bengal - Google Search
> 
> ...


she is black with marble markings and these markings are coming through more and more

no i payed £150 for her


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## NicoleW (Aug 28, 2010)

My kittens were like this, had bengal type brown markings under black fur that came out very well in the sun

They were just moggies and not purebred, I think you got hoodwinked.

PLUS any breeder of pedigrees or almost pedigrees SHOULD keep kittens until they are 12 weeks


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

NicoleW said:


> PLUS any breeder of pedigrees or almost pedigrees *or any cat* SHOULD keep kittens until they are 12 weeks


Bolding my addition


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## Golgotha_tramp (Feb 27, 2011)

NicoleW said:


> My kittens were like this, had bengal type brown markings under black fur that came out very well in the sun
> 
> They were just moggies and not purebred,


Mitzi has striped markings in a reddish brown under her black....£50 CPL mog.


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

Many black cats show tabby markings through, I believe all cats are tabby, just some show it and some don't, and the black cats often show it when younger for some reason and often end up matt black later on, sometimes not


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## Richochet (Sep 24, 2011)

yeah all the other kittens where kept with the breeder until 12 weeks
but the breeder felt it was okay for us to take her at 9 weeks, but take her back to the breeder at 12 weeks for her final injections

money isnt a problem for me, so im not that bothered that she cost £150 and she wasnt pure bred

i wanted a bengal not for its color but for its wild look, and she fits that very well

so overall im pleased with what i got for the price

i joined this site to get advice, not to have you all put her down with your oppinions


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## gloworm*mushroom (Mar 4, 2011)

All we want is for people to get what they want  If you are happy with her, thats great, but sadly I doubt she is even part Bengal.

Bengal breeders, proper ones, sell their kitten for £350+. I know she isnt pure, but, thats a dangerous path to tread as you might pay over the odds for a black moggy 

These people sound like people just breeding their pets for the sake of it, not actual breeders.


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## Golgotha_tramp (Feb 27, 2011)

I thinks she's gorgeous so I'm not putting her down.

caller her a black mog isn't insulting to me, but temperament and health are all that matters to me in an animal not a breed name.

Like G*M said, people are only trying to help people not pay over the odds for cats that are not what breeders say they are.


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## broccoli (Jul 1, 2011)

the first 2 replies had very good advice

as the kitten bonded with your GF, could she lend you some things that have her scent - sofa blanket maybe? or unwashed clothes ( not being rude -cats are very scent orientated) to help the transition


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## lisa2210 (Jul 15, 2008)

Cats can be very contrary, so the more she realises that you want her to cuddle you, the less likely she is to play ball. I agree with all the above advice, be there, cuddle her if she wants you to, play with her, feed her and hopefully she will thaw. The worst thing you can do is try and force the issue. Good luck.


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## sarahecp (Aug 22, 2011)

Hi Richy, welcome to PF and congrats on your little kitty 

She is very cute, what's here name?

I was going to mention what broccoli said  and just give the little one some time and she'll get used to you and start to bond.


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## Taylor85 (Oct 20, 2011)

Hi!

Personally, i think there are 2 issues here. One is that she was 9 weeks when she left her mum, so those vital last 3 weeks till she was 12 weeks WILL have played some role into her clinginess with your gf. 3 weeks isnt long at all to us humans in relation to a lifetime, but for a cat 3 weeks is a VERY long time, and imo, vital to their wellbeing. No cat whatsoever should leave their mum before 12 weeks, no matter what the breeder/owner says. Theyre not vets, not big experts on how cats feel etc.
The second is, she was taken from her mum straight to yourgirlfriends. She is now familiar with your gf's place and your gf's scent. Young animals of any kind, even humans, are very impressionable at such a young age, and like whats familiar to them. Give her time. It may take a long while for her to become fully comfortable. Treats, toys, some of your gfs clothes, bedding etc to plant around the house and help her feel comfortable will help. Also plug ina feliway diffuser. They are worth their weight in gold! HTH x


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## marleyboo (Oct 24, 2011)

i have the same issue.... my partner doesnt even like cats.... we got our cat and guess what shes follows him everywhere , lays on him meows for him!(safe to say hes now smitten with our kitten :thumbup

i dont mind though aslong as my princess is happy she can do what she likes... i get her to me sometimes with a little treat and brush her fur. she now sleeps on my side of the bed, a little bit of gentle persuasion...i agree i wouldnt lift her on your knee(i belive cats are very much like ladies...and that would irritate me if somebody constantly was craving my affection) play cool and soon your kitty will be like putty in your hands :thumbup:


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## waggy Tailz (Sep 14, 2011)

Richochet said:


> yeah all the other kittens where kept with the breeder until 12 weeks
> but the breeder felt it was okay for us to take her at 9 weeks, but take her back to the breeder at 12 weeks for her final injections
> 
> money isnt a problem for me, so im not that bothered that she cost £150 and she wasnt pure bred
> ...


I think she looks great whatever breed she is! My cat noddy, I feed him, Play with him, clean up after him, worry about him when he is out!, brush him, and he still goes and sits on my partners lap not mine! haha 
He does sit and cuddle me, but only if my partner is out, otherwise he is not interested in me lol


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