# My dog bit my child



## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

I am desperately needing advice, we are all so distraught about this. We have a gorgeous cocker girl who is almost 2. She is crazy, a bit unpredictable. We also have another dog who is a dream. Anyway over the time we have had her she had bit my husband, but me even though she was sitting cuddling me, she has bit my then 5yo 2-3 times, she has bit my 10yo, and she has bit my 12 yo. When she has done this she has been sleeping and the kids have went up to her and she’s just snapped at them. We have said to the kids that if she bites one more time she will have to go. Well tonight she bit my 12yo, she was sleeping next to me and my daughter was kissing her, I’ve told her time and time again don’t go up to her she might bite but she knows best, the dog lifted her head looked at my daughter and snapped twice, she has a cut under her eye and on the opposite cheek, she was bleeding. I’m devastated, I know what we should do but I’m just wanting reassurance that we are making the right decision. We lost our old dog last year and I’m still devastated over losing him and now this has happened, please can anyone help! Thank you.


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

@O2.0 @Rafa you can probably answer better than me.. I honestly cannot answer this one


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## Ochre (May 27, 2019)

So you know your dog snaps when she get woken up suddenly from sleeping, but yet you let your 12 year old child put her face next to your dog and kiss her when she is asleep?


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

Ochre said:


> So you know your dog snaps when she get woken up suddenly from sleeping, but yet you let your 12 year old child put her face next to your dog and kiss her when she is asleep?


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

I have told my daughter time and time again, she is 12 going on 21 so please I’m not looking for lectures on parenting, I am absolutely devastated.


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## Rafa (Jun 18, 2012)

Has your bitch only ever snapped when she's been woken from sleep?


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

That must have been a horrible shock for you and your daughter. Has she had the wounds treated and cleaned?


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

Rafa said:


> Has your bitch only ever snapped when she's been woken from sleep?


Yes she has. She is terrible for eating socks and my husband went to take it from her and she snapped at him, she also did this to me, trying to bite our hands. This was at the start of the year. The time she snapped at my face she was on my knee and I was stroking our other dog and she turned and snapped. She has snapped at my son when she was lying in her bed but awake.


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

SusieRainbow said:


> That must have been a horrible shock for you and your daughter. Has she had the wounds treated and cleaned?





SusieRainbow said:


> That must have been a horrible shock for you and your daughter. Has she had the wounds treated and cleaned?


Yes we cleaned her up. My daughter is so upset and is blaming herself.


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## Cleo38 (Jan 22, 2010)

I don't understand why you have let this continue. You know your dog will snap, you know your children are not heeding your warning (& in fairness they are children so cannot always think before they act) but you have still let this continue.

IMO you need some help from a behaviourist but in the mean time (if you decide to keep your dog) you need to give her somewhere safe to sleep where the children can't annoy her. Lots of people train their dogs to enjoy being in a crate & will prevent any biting.

It also sounds as if your dog is resource guarding so this is where a behaviourist could help you understand & mange this behaviour. If you let us know where you are then maybe someone could recommend one nearby.

Personally I would not be letting the dog up on to the sofa at all atm & getting her used to a crate asap to prevent any further occurrences.


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## JoanneF (Feb 1, 2016)

A few things (in no particular order) come to mind.

There is a reason for the saying 'let sleeping dogs lie'. If your children can't be trusted to understand she mustn't be disturbed, maybe get a pen, use baby gates across the doors or crate train your dog - by crate train, I mean do it slowly, don't shut the door until she is happy in the crate. These are other threads on this. Your priority is to keep the children safe from your dog and that means keeping your dog safe from your children.



Linda81 said:


> She is terrible for eating socks and my husband went to take it from her and she snapped at him, she also did this to me, trying to bite our hands.


Spaniels are known for resource guarding so taking something from her makes her want to keep it all the more. That could be food, socks, a comfy space, you - anything. Always have something special, something better, to swap or to lure her off the sofa. Please read the thread at the top of this category about resource guarding. But - the fact she snapped and didn't fully bite is a good sign, she at least showed some inhibition.

You have mentioned rehoming her. You will have problems rehoming a dog with a bite history. You said she has snapped before and this time, bitten. Dogs give a series of signals that they are unhappy, but unfortunately most people don't recognise them because they can be quite subtle. To begin with there is often wide eyes, lip licking and yawning. There is also muscular tension in the body. Then the ones we sometimes do see - growl, snarl, nip then bite. If the early signals are not seen (or, in the dog's view, ignored) he won't bother with them because us stupid humans pay no attention anyway; so he may go straight to the bite. So it's important never to ignore the early signals. As a friend says, she would rather be told verbally to sod off than be smacked in the face with no apparent warning.

I agree with the others who have said professional help is a must. Your insurance may cover it . If you say what part of the country you are in, someone may have a recommendation.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Some really good advice has been given, definitely get in touch with a behaviourist.

A really good book you might like to read on resource guarding behaviour Mine! by Jean Donaldson.

I also think you need to work on teaching your children about body language to look out for when dogs are uncomfortable, & that dogs aren't playthings for them to cuddle whenever they please.


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## O2.0 (May 23, 2018)

Linda81 said:


> I am desperately needing advice, we are all so distraught about this. We have a gorgeous cocker girl who is almost 2. She is crazy, a bit unpredictable. We also have another dog who is a dream. Anyway over the time we have had her she had bit my husband, but me even though she was sitting cuddling me, she has bit my then 5yo 2-3 times, she has bit my 10yo, and she has bit my 12 yo. When she has done this she has been sleeping and the kids have went up to her and she's just snapped at them. We have said to the kids that if she bites one more time she will have to go. Well tonight she bit my 12yo, she was sleeping next to me and my daughter was kissing her, I've told her time and time again don't go up to her she might bite but she knows best, the dog lifted her head looked at my daughter and snapped twice, she has a cut under her eye and on the opposite cheek, she was bleeding. I'm devastated, I know what we should do but I'm just wanting reassurance that we are making the right decision. We lost our old dog last year and I'm still devastated over losing him and now this has happened, please can anyone help! Thank you.


I'm so sorry you're going through this. 
I have to say, I too am having trouble understanding how your children have been able to repeatedly disturb the dog while she's sleeping. A one-time occurrence, maybe twice, but now you know, this dog bites when disturbed when sleeping, how on earth have the children managed to get to the dog repeatedly?

One thing we do know about dogs who bite, is that without appropriate and effective intervention, dogs who bite will do so again with less provocation and more damage every time. Each time your dog bites she is getting 'practice' in biting and the damage she does each time will escalate. You have already seen this, she has escalated from snapping to making contact, to drawing blood. The next time will be worse. You have to prevent these situations where you know the dog will bite. That is YOUR responsibility. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but my goodness, how many times does the dog have to tell you she doesn't like something for you to stop allowing it to happen?

Your dog is not unpredictable, she is very predictable. She will bite if disturbed when sleeping. It sounds like there is some resource guarding going on too. Again, very predictable behavior. 
While the biting is predictable, and there are ways to responsibly rehome a dog with this sort of bite history, you will struggle to find a responsible, legitimate rescue who will take her. You can not in good conscience rehome her yourself. There needs to be a professional involvement in the way of a credentialed behaviorist. A thorough vet check would not go amiss either.

I know you're thinking about rehoming her but if you choose not to, this is actually very fixable behavior. One, the dog doesn't get to sleep on the sofa any more. If she has a crate, that is her sleeping spot from now on. And of course the children are to not disturb her in her crate.

Good luck to you, I hope this ends up working out for all involved.


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## Calvine (Aug 20, 2012)

Linda81 said:


> she will have to go.


Not sure if this means rehome or if it's a euphemism for euthanise.


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## Sarah H (Jan 18, 2014)

I think O2.0 has hit the nail on the head. She's learned that snapping is the only way to get you to listen to her, and your kids still aren't heeding her warnings, things will only escalate and you could have a very serious incident. Get her a thorough vet check - ears, eyes, teeth, glands, joints, even a blood test. Then make sure she has a safe space to sleep where she will never be disturbed - a crate with a cover is best. Don't let her on the sofa and don't try to take things off her without swapping for something better - she needs to see it as a good deal for her. Spaniels have a tendency towards resource guarding whether that's objects, food, attention, or space, you need professional help for this before it becomes even more serious. It isn't easy to rehome a dog with a bite history, even if it's RG based because the dog has learned to use a high level of aggression to be heard, and it's hard for them to unlearn that.


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## Blitz (Feb 12, 2009)

I would not consider keeping her. Your children are not safe to have around a dog and the poor dog is going to pay the price. You cannot rehome her so there is only one answer I am afraid. I think you probably know this from what you have said.


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

Calvine said:


> Not sure if this means rehome or if it's a euphemism for euthanise.


I did think the same thing


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

JoanneF said:


> A few things (in no particular order) come to mind.
> 
> There is a reason for the saying 'let sleeping dogs lie'. If your children can't be trusted to understand she mustn't be disturbed, maybe get a pen, use baby gates across the doors or crate train your dog - by crate train, I mean do it slowly, don't shut the door until she is happy in the crate. These are other threads on this. Your priority is to keep the children safe from your dog and that means keeping your dog safe from your children.
> 
> ...


Thank you for your kind reply, we just can't take the chance she will do this again and in my heart of hearts I know she will. I have been in touch with a charity who are going to take her and hopefully find the right home for her. We are all distraught but we have to do the right thing for her and the kids.


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

Blitz said:


> I would not consider keeping her. Your children are not safe to have around a dog and the poor dog is going to pay the price. You cannot rehome her so there is only one answer I am afraid. I think you probably know this from what you have said.


Thank you for your reply, we have made the decision not to keep her.


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## Blitz (Feb 12, 2009)

Linda81 said:


> Thank you for your reply, we have made the decision not to keep her.


But you are going to let a charity have her who will possibly rehome her where she can bite someone. Or more likely they will fail and she will be one of these dogs that will be advertised in a few years as so sad that she has been in kennels for years and she really is not happy so can someone take her. Sorry, but I think you need to be responsible here and have her put to sleep, sad though it is. She is your responsibility so you need to make sure she does not suffer.


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## O2.0 (May 23, 2018)

Linda81 said:


> Thank you for your kind reply, we just can't take the chance she will do this again and in my heart of hearts I know she will. I have been in touch with a charity who are going to take her and hopefully find the right home for her. We are all distraught but we have to do the right thing for her and the kids.


Is the charity fully aware of her bite history. How many bites, the damage done? 
Are they going to rehabilitate her and rehome her, or is she going to a 'sanctuary' type situation (kennels) indefinitely? 
If they are going to rehabilitate, what are their methods? How are they going to go about re-training her?

If you chose to give her up to a charity, please ask a lot of questions and go about it with your eyes wide open.


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

Blitz said:


> But you are going to let a charity have her who will possibly rehome her where she can bite someone. Or more likely they will fail and she will be one of these dogs that will be advertised in a few years as so sad that she has been in kennels for years and she really is not happy so can someone take her. Sorry, but I think you need to be responsible here and have her put to sleep, sad though it is. She is your responsibility so you need to make sure she does not suffer.


What is wrong with you people!!!! I know what has happened is my responsibility, I know what becomes her future is my responsibility!!! How many times do I have to tell my children never ever go up to a dogs face especially when they are sleeping. I'm exhausted telling them over and over again that she will bite you. My daughter is going about with a black eye and 2 marks on her face but still sat on the floor and cuddling her, and is distraught and angry with us that she has to go. I would never give up on a dog, she is a beautiful sweet girl but just has this streak in her that we cannot control. She has never shown aggression to anyone or anything outside the house. She was the family dog, a dog for the kids to play with and they do, they love her and she does them. I just wanted someone to tell me what I already knew I should do. I spent all morning crying on the phone, explaining the situation but no where had space except this one charity that are going to foster her until a home can be found. I would never go on a forum and kick a person while they are down, silly me for thinking this was an advice forum not a virtual bashing. To those that have gave me good advice thank you.


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## SusieRainbow (Jan 21, 2013)

Linda, you *have *had advice, good advice. These topics on the forum are very upsetting for us all, we feel passionately about dog and child safety.
*Why* are you allowing your daughter, injured only yesterday, cuddle a confused dog with a serious bite history ?? You have said yourself that she has bitten with very little warning ( as in warning perceived by you and your children )
You have been told that each bite will be worse as her anxiety escalates.
You have had your mistakes pointed out , is that what you interpret as bashing ?
You have not been bashed, just advised in strong terms , but do not seem to be heeding the advice.


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

SusieRainbow said:


> Linda, you *have *had advice, good advice. These topics on the forum are very upsetting for us all on the forum, we feel passionately about dog and child safety.
> *Why* are you allowing your daughter, injured only yesterday, cuddle a confused dog with a serious bite history ?? You have said yourself that she has bitten with very little warning ( as in warning perceived by you and your children )
> You have been told that each bite will be worse as her anxiety escalates.
> You have not been bashed, just advised in strong terms , but do not seem to be heeding the advice.


My daughter is 12 at high school, I was in the kitchen where the dog was locked up and I turned round to find my daughter on the floor how did I possibly allow this???? I told her not to do that what else can I do, the dog is locked away and actually doesn't know why. I guess the right thing is take her to the vet tonight and get her put to sleep, is that it?? I've spoke in depth to 2 people from cocker rescue and Sunday is the earliest day that she can take her!!! They are fully aware the biting is when she's near me. I don't know how else to take the advice, we are removing our dog from our home. Honestly.


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## lullabydream (Jun 25, 2013)

Linda81 said:


> I just wanted someone to tell me what I already knew I should do.


Am sorry you are feeling hurt, but this isn't how dog forums or any forums work. You ask a question and you get answers. Some answers are not easy to read. They won't be all singing and dancing and agreements all the time. That doesn't even happen between people are use the forum regularly. This is why forum have moderators.

You have actually got good advice, you have had it explained to you how a responsible person should move on. It might not be what you want to hear but good solid advice


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## O2.0 (May 23, 2018)

Linda81 said:


> but just has this streak in her that we cannot control.


But you can!! All you have to do is not bother her when she's sleeping!

Thought I do fully agree that your daughter should not be cuddling her after already sustaining a bite doing exactly that. Dogs don't like cuddles like we think they do.

I'm sorry you feel attacked, I know this has got to be a terribly stressful and upsetting time, but surely you can see that this is like having a conversation of "I keep burning myself on the stove" and the response is "don't touch the stove when it's hot." 
From this end it seems so simple, so yes, it is confusing/frustrating on this end too.


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## Cleo38 (Jan 22, 2010)

Linda81 said:


> What is wrong with you people!!!! I know what has happened is my responsibility, I know what becomes her future is my responsibility!!! How many times do I have to tell my children never ever go up to a dogs face especially when they are sleeping. I'm exhausted telling them over and over again that she will bite you. My daughter is going about with a black eye and 2 marks on her face but still sat on the floor and cuddling her, and is distraught and angry with us that she has to go. I would never give up on a dog, she is a beautiful sweet girl but just has this streak in her that we cannot control. She has never shown aggression to anyone or anything outside the house. She was the family dog, a dog for the kids to play with and they do, they love her and she does them. I just wanted someone to tell me what I already knew I should do. I spent all morning crying on the phone, explaining the situation but no where had space except this one charity that are going to foster her until a home can be found. I would never go on a forum and kick a person while they are down, silly me for thinking this was an advice forum not a virtual bashing. To those that have gave me good advice thank you.


But you know that you telling them hasn't worked so why let it continue. You are the adult, you know the consequences for the dog so you (& your husband) should have taken steps to prevent this happening, It is unfair on your children & the poor dog to have let this continue. Your dog has told you time & time again yet you didn't listen to her.

Take some responsibility & recognise that you failed to manage this correctly. If you are going to rehome her then at least let the rescue know what has happened so they can work on this behaviour & inform any potential new owners of this


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## Calvine (Aug 20, 2012)

What has happened is bad enough, but if the dog were to bite a child who was visiting/playing with your daughter, it would be even worse. I do think tho' that if my son at the age of 12 had been bitten in the face by one of our dogs, he'd have been sure to give them a wide berth (for a while, anyway).


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## Linda81 (Nov 7, 2019)

Cleo38 said:


> But you know that you telling them hasn't worked so why let it continue. You are the adult, you know the consequences for the dog so you (& your husband) should have taken steps to prevent this happening, It is unfair on your children & the poor dog to have let this continue. Your dog has told you time & time again yet you didn't listen to her.
> 
> Take some responsibility & recognise that you failed to manage this correctly. If you are going to rehome her then at least let the rescue know what has happened so they can work on this behaviour & inform any potential new owners of this


I have spoke in depth about every single part of the entire situation with the rehoming charity!! I can't change the past, and this is why I feel attacked, my god if I could change the whole situation I wouldn't be asking what to do on here. My daughter isn't bothered that she has been biting and I am mad. I can't change what has happened.


Calvine said:


> What has happened is bad enough, but if the dog were to bite a child who was visiting/playing with your daughter, it would be even worse. I do think tho' that if my son at the age of 12 had been bitten in the face by one of our dogs, he'd have been sure to give them a wide berth (for a while, anyway).





Calvine said:


> What has happened is bad enough, but if the dog were to bite a child who was visiting/playing with your daughter, it would be even worse. I do think tho' that if my son at the age of 12 had been bitten in the face by one of our dogs, he'd have been sure to give them a wide berth (for a while, anyway).


I just don't know how I can get through to her to be honest, I am mad that she thinks that this is ok.


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## Calvine (Aug 20, 2012)

Linda81 said:


> I am mad that she thinks that this is ok.


It's amazing that she still trusts and loves the dog so much; it's very sad.


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## lorilu (Sep 6, 2009)

.


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## O2.0 (May 23, 2018)

*sigh* the child is no more being a 'brat' than the dog is. And the child doesn't deserve to be blamed for the dog losing her home any more than the dog should be. Adults are the responsible parties here.

@Linda81 it's not up to your child to listen to you. YOU take charge of the situation. If the child won't leave the dog alone, you remove the dog or the child or both. Done. 
You don't leave them there cuddling waiting for the next bite to happen. It's not fair on either of them.


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