# Anti-social kitten



## JuliaToff (May 13, 2012)

Hiya, I need all the tips and tricks for the following problem. I got Toffee on Friday night out of a litter of 8kittens, him being the first one to leave his mommy and brothers. He was born on the 10th of March, so he's 9 weeks today. When I brought him home, I left the pet carrier's door open, so he can come out and explore at his own wish. He found his way to the litter box, so I was very impressed. Now, the problem is he's been meowing non-stop since, day and night, every minute, every hour, although when I speak to him, he stops meowing and looks at me like I'm some kind of creature. He sleeps in his pet carrier (I took the cover off, so he will have more space), not in the cat bed that I provided for him. He does not want to be touched or being near us, whatever we do. I don't know whether I should let him get used to us gradually or being insistent. I'm happy that he plays, eats, drinks kitten milk, goes toilet etc, but I'm not sure about him being anti-social. Please help! Thanks.


P.S. If there's already a thread with the same problem, can an admin move my message there? Thank you.


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## lymorelynn (Oct 4, 2008)

He's still only a baby and needs to adjust to being on his own.He is meowing because he is missing his mum and siblings. You could give him a small teddy to cuddle up to.
Don't force him to come to you, just be in the same room with him and talk quietly to him. Try an interactive toy like a wand or fishing rod type to get him used to playing with you Dangler Pole Cat Toys at zooplus


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## JuliaToff (May 13, 2012)

Thanks for your quick reply. I was thinking it might be missing his mommy. However, I think he feels like home, because he sleeps good, plays and jumps around, it's just when the playing/sleeping ends that he starts meowing, when he probably realises he's still not with his mommy. I hope that the nights when I could actually sleep will come back soon  and of course, he will feel secure and happy in his new home.


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## chillminx (Nov 22, 2010)

Hi 

You need to give your kitten lots more time to settle in and adjust. He has just been through the most enormous change in his short little life -- leaving his mom and his siblings, and going to a strange environment with strange people. He is probably frightened and missing his mom. That's why he is crying.  He will take time to get over what has happened to him.

Take things slowly and gently. Confine him to one room with his litter tray, water, food, toys etc. Give him some places to hide (e.g. cardboard boxes) so he doesn't feel so exposed. Go in and spend some time with him, for say an hour at a time several times a day. Talk to him, play with him. Toys like toys wands are useful as you don;t need to get close to him. 
By playing with him you will distract him from missing his mom & siblings, and will also be laying down the foundations of the future bond between you and him. 

Patience is of the essence. He will come to you when he is ready. Do not force the pace, as he may feel threatened and get more scared. 

It is very good he is using the litter tray, eating, drinking etc. It shows his mom taught him well. 

Leave him to sleep in the pet carrier for now, if he wants. It will do no harm and there may be some residual scents there of his old home, his mom and his siblings to comfort him.


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## delca1 (Oct 29, 2011)

Imagine how it must feel, one minute everything is happy and safe then you are whisked away out of the only place you have known and find yourself somewhere new and scary. Your Mum and brothers and sisters have vanished. Crying doesn't bring them back.

Patience and loads of love is the best bet 
And maybe a hotwater bottle wrapped in a blanket for warmth and comfort.


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## Kyria (Oct 29, 2011)

Hi there, ive got a new kitten too, he is now 10 weeks old, he crys alot too, sometimes its because he is hungry, and sometimes I think it is because he wants attention. we have had him nearly two weeks now and he isnt crying quite so much now. I think he knows now we love him as he does jump up on us for a cuddle especially when he is tired. Your kitten will do the same too just give it time. I got this play tunnel for him from Amazon he loves it as he can play and hide in there too if he just wants to have some private time. He also loves to play with interactive toys like the one someone suggested from Zooplus, its a great way to bond with kittie.


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## JuliaToff (May 13, 2012)

Thanks, guys. He's got a few toys, but he seems to be enjoying the newspaper and the extension lead (which is unplugged) better. Kyria, was your kitten unsociable at the beginning as well? I have 3 cats in my mom's house, but I can't remember any of them being like this. At least, Phillippe, the youngest amongst the 3 others, was sleeping in my hair the first night I brought him home, so that's why I was quite concerned about Toffee. About having him locked in a room, I don't see how is that going to help, as he does not leave the living room. There's plenty of spaces he can hide into in the living room: behind the sofa, under the armchair, behind the TV etc. and he seems quite happy with this. But thanks for your reply


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## delca1 (Oct 29, 2011)

Hmm, playing with newspaper is not such a good plan. My youngest cat loves it she can flick open a folded paper, then hide under it for ambushing us and then shreds it. Completely. Funny when she was tiny, not so good now she's 2 and gets to the paper before we have read it 

Actually its a cheap way of keeping her amused for hours!


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## Kyria (Oct 29, 2011)

JuliaToff said:


> Thanks, guys. He's got a few toys, but he seems to be enjoying the newspaper and the extension lead (which is unplugged) better. Kyria, was your kitten unsociable at the beginning as well? I have 3 cats in my mom's house, but I can't remember any of them being like this. At least, Phillippe, the youngest amongst the 3 others, was sleeping in my hair the first night I brought him home, so that's why I was quite concerned about Toffee. About having him locked in a room, I don't see how is that going to help, as he does not leave the living room. There's plenty of spaces he can hide into in the living room: behind the sofa, under the armchair, behind the TV etc. and he seems quite happy with this. But thanks for your reply


Hi Julia, I cant really say little Nemo was unsociable, as he would come over to us and purr but he was one of the last to leave the litter as there was only him and another kitten left all his brothers and sisters had gone days earlier so maybe he didnt find it quite so hard leaving his family when we got him. Im sure things will be fine with little toffee and as he gets to know you more he will become alot more bold and confident.


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## JuliaToff (May 13, 2012)

Hehe, thanks 

After posting here earlier, I gave him a good stroke, he started purring, but then became too anxious, so I let him do his own things. That should make him feel safe, right? :smilewinkgrin:


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## Kyria (Oct 29, 2011)

Yes it will, I think the key here is just doing things slowly slowly with him to make him feel secure. Kittens are so gorgeous but hard work too. I feel like ive got a new baby in the house again.


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## Lunabuma (Dec 12, 2011)

My Luna and Ziggy hid in a cupboard for 2 - 3 days before they ventured out and built their confidence up! They were 5 months old at the time so your very young kitten may take a couple of weeks. 

It may help to have a blanket from the breeder's home that smells of mum / brothers and sisters. Other than that, you just need to give it plenty of time and patience to settle.


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## JuliaToff (May 13, 2012)

Thanks again for all your messages. I must say that we're almost friends now. He comes to me every now and then and starts smelling my hands  Also, last night, he slept like a baby, until the sun rose, when he came next to my bed and started meowing (Wake up, new mooooommyyyy meoooow meoooowut. I am a bit concerned as he's going to be home alone today for about 8 hours. I left him both dry and wet food, milk and water (although he doesn't drink any water, he likes hitting it with his paws, so a bit of entertainment while I'm not there). I hope he'll be ok hmy:hmy:


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