# Our bunny died. Can’t help but blame myself.



## Shantelle (Aug 25, 2019)

Hey everyone. I’m new here. We have, well had  a beautiful bunny named Phoebe. He’s a boy. We thought he was a girl when we got him but later found out he was a boy lol. He is pretty much free roamed, he eats nothing but oxbow and lots and lots of hay and occasional veggies. He was very healthy. Three days ago I noticed he stopped eating and drinking, I was really concerned so my husband and I took him to the vet immediately- the vet told us he had GI and he gave us meds, and critical care to syringe feed him. He also gave Phoebe fluids while at the Vet and xrays to make sure everything was okay. For the past two days we have been syringe feeding, giving pain meds as needed, feeding water, offering food but he still wouldn’t eat on his own. He wouldn’t poo or pee- finally he had diarrhea 3 times, but then was constipated afterwords, we kept syringe feeding, and he suddenly started making squeaks in pain. Sounded like “little bunny screams” I gave him lots of belly massages. We called the vet last night and told them he was squeaking a bit and definitely in pain, she said it was normal from the GI and took keep syringe feeding him and to come in on Monday. We stayed up with him until 6 in the AM, finally got him comfortable and layed down. We woke up 4 hours later, to him limp on the ground, squeaking and he could not get up, it was heart breaking- we wrapped him in a blanket and got in our car immediately- while driving to the ER vet, he was gasping for hair- I was rubbing his head trying my best to calm him down- he started shaking and died in my arms, I was and still am heart broken. We arrived to the vet and the veterinarian told us it was too late to try and revive him because he was getting stiff. We were upset because we called to try and bring him in the night before and they told us that still they wouldn’t have been able to do anything. They were comforting, but still I cannot help and blame myself that he died because we didn’t take him in last night and I can’t help but blame the Vet for telling us to wait it out because it was just his GI symptoms. Please friends, bare with me and help put my mind at ease. I can’t stop crying- my husband is trying to comfort me and tell me it’s okay and nothing could have prevented this, but my mind and heart is going crazy and I feel like a horrible human.
Please be kind.
With love, Shantelle
I will attach a photo of our sweet bun Phoebe. We love and miss him so much.


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## Rachel Bentham (Aug 25, 2019)

Hi Shantelle 
Your bunny was so cute. You must not blame yourself. You really did all you could. Sending big hugs to you xx


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## Lurcherlad (Jan 5, 2013)

Very sorry for your loss


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## Blaise in Surrey (Jun 10, 2014)

So sorry. Please understand that everyone goes through this horrible questioning when a dearly loved animal dies, however simple or complex the circumstances: it’s part of the grieving process. Bunnies are tricky; they can be fine one moment and very un-fine the next.... You did the best you could at the time: let that be enough.


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## kimthecat (Aug 11, 2009)

HI Shantelle, I so sorry to hear this. 

I used to have rabbits and they have such great personalities . It was heartbreaking when one of them died.


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## Shantelle (Aug 25, 2019)

Thank you for all the replies you guys. I’m so heartbroken. I’m so mad at myself that the vet told us not to take him in because him behavior was normal for the illness and to just keep giving him the meds. I keep thinking of the what if’s.


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## Shantelle (Aug 25, 2019)

I feel so much guilt and anxiety tonight. I have so much anxiety. Today is different. It’s like a whole other world. I miss him so much.
I hope he knows how much I love him and that I wish I could have done more
I hate myself tonight


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## ChaosCat (Dec 7, 2017)

Don’t beat yourself up, please! You did all you could. You rang the vet and followed their advice- that’s what you do, that’s what vets are for.
He surely knew he was loved all the time, he was in your arms, he heard your heartbeat.
Very sorry for your loss!


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## Bugsys grandma (Aug 3, 2018)

I'm so so sorry for your loss. 
As @Blaise in Surrey says, bunnies can be very tricky. They can indeed be absolutely fine one minute and go downhill ridiculously quickly. 
You did everything you could for Phoebe, and you were with him, he wasn't alone and that is very important for you and for him. 
He was one lucky bunny, he was clearly very much loved and extremely well cared for and sadly not all bunnies get that, he was one of the lucky ones, he had a good life and lots of love.

The way you are feeling is perfectly natural, it's part of the grieving process. You may not think it now but you will, in time, start to hurt less.

Please feel free to come on here and chat whenever you feel the need to, talking often helps.

I've lost lots of very very much loved animals in my time, dogs, cats, rabbits and it is in my opinion, one of the hardest things. But I'm still here and I'm ok, and you will be too my love, just be kind to yourself. None of what happened was your fault, you did everything you could.
Phoebe, absolutely knows you love him, don't ever doubt that.


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## Veronica Chapman (Dec 28, 2018)

So sorry for your loss Shantelle, your lovely bunny Phoebe is beautiful, hang on to that. You have nothing to be guilty of, life can be very cruel, you and hubby have done your best to save him. 
We do understand the raw pain here. You guys have to be kind to yourselves, let time heal. Keep talking about Phoebe. It helps.
Veronica x


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