# How can they afford it



## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

Three young unemployed Mothers with 8 children between them, went in the pub over the road just before 3pm then fetched the kids from school straight back to the pub and they are still there now nearly 8pm.


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## Guest (Sep 9, 2014)

Happy Paws said:


> Three young unemployed Mothers with 8 children between them, went in the pub over the road just before 3pm then fetched the kids from school straight back to the pub and they are still there now nearly 8pm.


'awaits the arrival of colliebarmy'


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## LDK1 (Oct 1, 2010)

Is this a riddle?


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

Happy Paws said:


> Three young unemployed Mothers with 8 children between them, went in the pub over the road just before 3pm then fetched the kids from school straight back to the pub and they are still there now nearly 8pm.


Are you Michael Caine?


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## rottiepointerhouse (Feb 9, 2014)

Perhaps they are having a meeting? or a darts match or perhaps someone else is paying for the drinks?


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

rottiepointerhouse said:


> Perhaps they are having a meeting? or a darts match or perhaps someone else is paying for the drinks?


Or they are at a family gathering?

The list is endless :yesnod:

If the op is that concerned why not ask them?


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

jon bda said:


> 'awaits the arrival of colliebarmy'


Theyve been saving on the shopping by begging at the local foodbank

it leaves them £80 a week for beer and ****


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

rottiepointerhouse said:


> Perhaps they are having a meeting? or a darts match or perhaps someone else is paying for the drinks?





StormyThai said:


> Or they are at a family gathering?
> 
> The list is endless :yesnod:
> 
> If the op is that concerned why not ask them?


Or dealing drugs :laugh:


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

LDK1 said:


> Is this a riddle?


more like a pi55take


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

Maybe they are in the pub but not paying for anything.

I'm not sure I have ever paid for my own drink.


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

Shoshannah said:


> Maybe they are in the pub but not paying for anything.
> 
> I'm not sure I have ever paid for my own drink.


I would be ashamed to admit that :hand:


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

rona said:


> I would be ashamed to admit that :hand:


some have no shame, as im sure youve seen


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## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

Why do you give a hoot?


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

rottiepointerhouse said:


> Perhaps they are having a meeting? or a darts match or perhaps someone else is paying for the drinks?





StormyThai said:


> Or they are at a family gathering?
> 
> The list is endless :yesnod:
> 
> If the op is that concerned why not ask them?


I totally agree, I can think of loads of reasons they Maybe in the pub. 
They may also be in their having a few drink but I simply do not know enough to even begin making judgements about people I do not know.

I would just like to add, I've been in a pub all day with children for a fund raising function, kids were helping on a cake stall. Adults were Not drinking alcohol and I didn't spend much money, you can still get cordial and water in most pubs. If it bothers you that much I suggest you go and look for yourself.


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

rottiepointerhouse said:


> Perhaps they are having a meeting? or a darts match or perhaps someone else is paying for the drinks?


They are always over there, does make you wonder where they get the money from, just a thought could it be us.


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## Guest (Sep 9, 2014)

Colliebarmy said:


> Theyve been saving on the shopping by begging at the local foodbank
> 
> it leaves them £80 a week for beer and ****












Thank god (am i allowed to mention god?) That you and your middle of the road views are here!


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

Happy Paws.

What sort of pub is it?

How old are the kids?

If the Mums got there just before 3, they can't have been there for long before having to fetch the kids?

Perhaps they were organising a party.

Who knows.

And how do you know all their comings and goings are you in the pub yourself? :ciappa: or sat there with your curtains twitching? :rolleyes5:


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Happy Paws said:


> They are always over there, does make you wonder where they get the money from, just a thought could it be us.


'Always' can be a relative context- I mean, they can't possibly be over there when the pub's shut!

They could have partners who work away & make a reasonable wage? I remember when my OH worked away I was desperately lonely.


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

Lol I didn't think of that! Someone has got a serious case of net rash from curtain twitching


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## Blackcats (Apr 13, 2013)

Some people really like knowing everybody else's business and concentrate really hard on their lives instead of their own.

Some of the attitudes on this forum....I really expect some people to be sitting by their windows, pair of binoculars, pen and paper at the ready nosying at other people and jotting everything down. 

2.00pm - Watching Miss Susan cut that big chocolate cake through her kitchen window.. How dare she buy that. Bet its from asda too. Ha.

3.00 - Miss Susan's children are playing on their bikes again. Wonder how she afforded those. 

4.00 - The retched boyfriend of hers is home. Look at the car he has. Tsk. Tsk. Doesn't matter if it's an old banger that looks like it will fall apart at any time. He's not allowed. I say so.

4.15 - Oohhh people visiting her house. Who are they. Must remember their faces.

5.00 - Miss Susan has just had pizza delivered to her door. I wonder where that money has come from.

But seriously who freaking cares.

Get on with your lives. Nobody is perfect. I always say sort your own lives out first before nosing at others.

Or go down this route.

'I am so outraged at the stranger I have been stalking and spying on and the stranger whose mind I can read who gets in my cab (That's how I know see) that I am going to write a strong letter about this to Mr Cameron.'


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

jon bda said:


> Thank god (*am i allowed to mention god*?) That you and your middle of the road views are here!


Small g, yes, big G, no


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Colliebarmy said:


> Theyve been saving on the shopping by begging at the local foodbank
> 
> it leaves them £80 a week for beer and ****


I know a family that have food bank deliveries then spend £40 a week on a chinese takeway!!


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

I think if the OP is a taxpayer they have every right to wonder WTF is going on if benefit money is being spent in pubs


I cant afford to go out, and ill be out at 5am tomorrow working, not a late finish but I work 6 days a week, if i drink 1 pint a week its as much as i do, and it wont be in pub (cant afford pub prices), I do 12 hours on a saturday, cos im only part time now.....but i have done a 26 hour shift to earn a wage


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

Iheartcats said:


> I know a family that have food bank deliveries then spend £40 a week on a chinese takeway!!


sounds like a plan to me, where do i sign up?


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## Iheartcats (Aug 25, 2011)

Happy Paws said:


> They are always over there, does make you wonder where they get the money from, just a thought could it be us.


I know what you mean. There are some "social housing" home near us and they all have expensive 4x4's, BMW's, fancy motorbikes etc parked outside meanwhile my husband works all the hours under the sun, has to scrimp and save to keep a roof over our heads and meanwhile all the people on benefits get alot for free like new windows and new kitchens!

It does my husbands head right in!


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

Blackcats said:


> Some people really like knowing everybody else's business and concentrate really hard on their lives instead of their own.
> 
> Some of the attitudes on this forum....I really expect some people to be sitting by their windows, pair of binoculars, pen and paper at the ready nosying at other people and jotting everything down.
> 
> ...


That's pretty much the internal dialogue I imagine is running through the head of the one awful neighbour we have :laugh:

He's written stuff down, taken photographs of our house, our car, any visitors' cars & the builders van when we had an extension done a few years back, repeatedly called the police & fire brigade on us until he finally got told he would be charged with wasting police time if he carried on, verbally abused my children & will drive slowly past & stare at me menacingly if I'm ever out with the dogs.

He literally has never spoken to us in the 14 years we've lived here, knows nothing about us, but has pretty much composed an imaginary dossier of our apparent misdemeanors.


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

rona said:


> I would be ashamed to admit that :hand:


Not when you realise the only think I ever drink is water. :lol:


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## Guest (Sep 9, 2014)

Colliebarmy said:


> Small g, yes, big G, no


Big A though yeah?


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## Muze (Nov 30, 2011)

The foodbank does not work like that, you have to get a voucher after having a professional deem you in 'hardship'. You cannot just wander in, show proof of benefits and take what you want. 

And, well single Mum's do rake it in on benefits tbh. 

But equally, did they buy much? I've spent nearly all day in pub waiting for a friend travelling down from Durham, I spent about a fiver all day lol


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## Bellaboo1 (Aug 10, 2011)

jon bda said:


> Thank god (am i allowed to mention god?) That you and your middle of the road views are here!


What the same as your middle of the road views, what's being white and the BNP got to do with the OP's question ?


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

Shoshannah said:


> Not when you realise the only think I ever drink is water. :lol:


Don't you still have to pay for that in pubs, or do you mean you are the driver?


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## CaliDog (Jun 3, 2012)

rona said:


> Don't you still have to pay for that in pubs, or do you mean you are the driver?


nope tap water is free is all the pubs I have ever been in.


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

Colliebarmy said:


> I think if the OP is a taxpayer they have every right to wonder WTF is going on if benefit money is being spent in pubs
> 
> I cant afford to go out, and ill be out at 5am tomorrow working, not a late finish but I work 6 days a week, if i drink 1 pint a week its as much as i do, and it wont be in pub (cant afford pub prices), I do 12 hours on a saturday, cos im only part time now.....but i have done a 26 hour shift to earn a wage


I do tend to agree that TAX payers do have a right to wonder where their contributions are going and that they would like to know its being used wisely by the government.

However it doesnt give people (even TAX payers) the right to randomly start making judgements about people. If they are abusing the system thats for the courts to decide NOT the curtain twitches.
How do we know they even claim benefits? have we seen their bank statements? what that they spent in the pub? did we see the bar tab? we have no evidence of any kind other than someone curtain twitching.
I also work long hours (full time in one job and part time in another,) I pay my fair share of TAX and I dont begrudge it where it is needed. I do agree that it is being abused and the government should address it, it doesnt help accusing random people in the street and speculating about something we all know nothing about.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

simplysardonic said:


> That's pretty much the internal dialogue I imagine is running through the head of the one awful neighbour we have :laugh:
> 
> He's written stuff down, taken photographs of our house, our car, any visitors' cars & the builders van when we had an extension done a few years back, repeatedly called the police & fire brigade on us until he finally got told he would be charged with wasting police time if he carried on, verbally abused my children & will drive slowly past & stare at me menacingly if I'm ever out with the dogs.
> 
> He literally has never spoken to us in the 14 years we've lived here, knows nothing about us, but has pretty much composed an imaginary dossier of our apparent misdemeanors.


I have a neighbour just like this too. She lives up a hill from me and about maybe 0.75miles away( not too sure) She came to introduce herself the weekend we moved in..took an instant dislike to her but was polite...and she told me, she spends her days with binoculars watching everything and said from her bedroom window she could see right into my bedroom window...not sure if its true but thought maybe I will give her something to really look at then.

She is a vile woman...and people like this always end up on their own cos eventually everybody gives up on them.

Local farmer came to introduce himself a week after we moved in..told me what an old witch the neighbour is and to watch my back with her.Seems she has had run ins with most of the people from around here and a lot of the small town down the road...nobody has a kind word for her.

She is known as the witch on the hill. says it all.


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

Happy Paws said:


> Three young unemployed Mothers with 8 children between them, went in the pub over the road just before 3pm then fetched the kids from school straight back to the pub and they are still there now nearly 8pm.


are you sure they are unemployed?? Maybe they all got jobs as barmaids!

I really miss being a nosey neighbour though. I live on a busy road oppisite a park now and there is very little opportunity. Used to live in a cul de sac and it was awesome for spying and general noseyness!


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

rona said:


> Don't you still have to pay for that in pubs, or do you mean you are the driver?


Tap water, man!


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

ClaireLouise said:


> I do tend to agree that TAX payers do have a right to wonder where their contributions are going and that they would like to know its being used wisely by the government.
> 
> However it doesnt give people (even TAX payers) the right to randomly start making judgements about people. If they are abusing the system thats for the courts to decide NOT the curtain twitches.
> How do we know they even claim benefits? have we seen their bank statements? what that they spent in the pub? did we see the bar tab? we have no evidence of any kind other than someone curtain twitching.
> I also work long hours (full time in one job and part time in another,) I pay my fair share of TAX and I dont begrudge it where it is needed. I do agree that it is being abused and the government should address it, it doesnt help accusing random people in the street and speculating about something we all know nothing about.


we can wonder all we like where our money goes but I doubt very much we would ever be told the truth.


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## Aubrie30 (Aug 10, 2014)

What is the world coming to?!! This is outrageous!!! Seriously, I'm so mad!!! How dare those benefit scrounging, barely-out-of-nappies-themselves girls procreate and then take their more than likely illegitimate and illiterate offspring to the PUB on a sunny Tuesday afternoon. They are all going to hell!!!!!!

Or.....

They stopped into the pub to sit in the garden and enjoy the sunshine and have a catch up before going to collect the kids. Then, deciding that seeing that the weather was still good, they went back to the pub so the kids could play in the garden and have a packet of crisps and you should mind your own business.

Are benefits claimants not allowed any little luxuries in life or any fun at all? Should they all sit in dark and dindgy council flats with only pot noodles and Heinz beans to eat so that you can feel they are deserving of your 'hard earned money'? Why is there so little going on in your own life that you have to pay such close attention to the goings on of perfect strangers?

Yours sincerely, 

A young, out of work mother, who claims benefits.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Colliebarmy said:


> I think if the OP is a taxpayer they have every right to wonder WTF is going on if benefit money is being spent in pubs
> 
> I cant afford to go out, and ill be out at 5am tomorrow working, not a late finish but I work 6 days a week, if i drink 1 pint a week its as much as i do, and it wont be in pub (cant afford pub prices), I do 12 hours on a saturday, cos im only part time now.....but i have done a 26 hour shift to earn a wage


Nobody else's business where anybody spends their money...benefit money or not.


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

Maybe they are self centre arrogant Londoners who are lost and are using the pub as a base to plot there way home?


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## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

Aubrie30 said:


> What is the world coming to?!! This is outrageous!!! Seriously, I'm so mad!!! How dare those benefit scrounging, barely-out-of-nappies-themselves girls procreate and then take their more than likely illegitimate and illiterate offspring to the PUB on a sunny Tuesday afternoon. They are all going to hell!!!!!!
> 
> Or.....
> 
> ...


Nope... Pot Noodles and Heinz beans are expensive, Value range please :rolleyes5:


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Megan345 said:


> Nope... Pot Noodles and Heinz beans are expensive, Value range please :rolleyes5:


nope, sorry, doesn't matter how skint I have been...and I have been.lol...its always got to be Heinz beans.lol


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## Aubrie30 (Aug 10, 2014)

lilythepink said:


> nope, sorry, doesn't matter how skint I have been...and I have been.lol...its always got to be Heinz beans.lol


I concur. Tesco own brand beans don't have enough sauce and the tin dries out in the fridge so you can't eat the leftovers for breakfast. It's got to be Heinz.
Tesco value chicken noodles are quite nice though.


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

My mother claims benefits. What she spends it on is none of anyone else's business really. She worked for years, many of them as a single parent.


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

Aubrie30 said:


> I concur. Tesco own brand beans don't have enough sauce and the tin dries out in the fridge so you can't eat the leftovers for breakfast. It's got to be Heinz.
> Tesco value chicken noodles are quite nice though.


I'm afraid I must disagree. I'm quite happy to eat own-brand beans, but for noodles I MUST have Batchelor's Super Noodles.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Aubrie30 said:


> I concur. Tesco own brand beans don't have enough sauce and the tin dries out in the fridge so you can't eat the leftovers for breakfast. It's got to be Heinz.
> Tesco value chicken noodles are quite nice though.


so are the curry ones.lol


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

Shoshannah said:


> My mother claims benefits. What she spends it on is none of anyone else's business really. She worked for years, many of them as a single parent.


So does my mother, and I agree. It isnt anyone elses business.


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## tinaK (Jun 12, 2010)

Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

This thread would make a good comedy sketch . I for one need some tenor ladies!


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## Bellaboo1 (Aug 10, 2011)

cloversmum said:


> Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


Were you having a teddy bears picnic lol


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

cloversmum said:


> Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


hey lady I pay tax and I dont begrudge you a coke down the pub, just so long as it was only the one!


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

gorgeous said:


> This thread would make a good comedy sketch . I for one need some tenor ladies!


Dont pay for Tena products, you can get them on prescription  Quick before someone objects to people claiming them too!


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

ClaireLouise said:


> Dont pay for Tena products, you can get them on prescription  Quick before someone objects to people claiming them too!


I pay for prescriptions! Cheaper to get them from Tesco. Get clubcard points!


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## Megan345 (Aug 8, 2012)

cloversmum said:


> Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


Well you are braver than me!


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## shetlandlover (Dec 6, 2011)

Who's to say their husbands don't have really good jobs? Or that they dont work themselves and are on a day off?

They could be there planning an event, hell maybe even having a get together themselves.


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## tinaK (Jun 12, 2010)

gorgeous said:


> hey lady I pay tax and I dont begrudge you a coke down the pub, just so long as it was only the one!


only one ... and it was to help me to build up my confidence in social situations, before anyone asks what my support worker was doing in a pub with me


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

gorgeous said:


> This thread would make a good comedy sketch . I for one need some *tenor ladies*!












Sorry couldn't resist it!


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## Bellaboo1 (Aug 10, 2011)

cloversmum said:


> Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


And did the bears mind you being in their garden .... !


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

cloversmum said:


> only one ... and it was to help me to build up my confidence in social situations, before anyone asks what my support worker was doing in a pub with me


You dont have to justify yourself to anyone.


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## Guest (Sep 9, 2014)

Megan345 said:


> Well you are braver than me!












Wuss!!!


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## CaliDog (Jun 3, 2012)

Can open ............Worms everywhere


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

CaliDog said:


> Can open ............Worms everywhere


Are they a value can or a brand name ?


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

gorgeous said:


> I pay for prescriptions! Cheaper to get them from Tesco. Get clubcard points!


prescriptions in scotland still free...bet that would change if we got independence...oops, sorry, wrong thread


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

shoshannah said:


> sorry couldn't resist it! :d


lolololololololol!!


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## CaliDog (Jun 3, 2012)

ClaireLouise said:


> Are they a value can or a brand name ?


only the best


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

CaliDog said:


> only the best


hahaha thats brilliant, really made me laugh, sending you rep lol


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## CaliDog (Jun 3, 2012)

ClaireLouise said:


> hahaha thats brilliant, really made me laugh, sending you rep lol


thank you very much


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## Summersky (Aug 11, 2012)

cloversmum said:


> Well my support worker and I often went and sat in a bear garden with a coke in the summer.. and I'm on benefits. Absolutely outrageous of me!


Disgraceful. How could you?!



ClaireLouise said:


> hahaha thats brilliant, really made me laugh, sending you rep lol


Me too! Brilliant.

Re original post - not ours to judge, as long as the parents don't get rolling drunk and the children are well supervised and in bed at a reasonable time.

Perhaps it was a kiddies birthday party?


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## tinaK (Jun 12, 2010)

Summersky said:


> Disgraceful. How could you?!


I know .. shoot me down now


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## northnsouth (Nov 17, 2009)

ClaireLouise said:


> Dont pay for Tena products, you can get them on prescription  Quick before someone objects to people claiming them too!


Actually I don't think you can any more.



CaliDog said:


> Can open ............Worms everywhere





ClaireLouise said:


> Are they a value can or a brand name ?


You beat me to it


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## ClaireLouise (Oct 11, 2009)

northnsouth said:


> Actually I don't think you can any more.
> 
> it


You can if you fit the criteria, I do the assessments as part of my job. And you dont pay for the prescription either its not the type of prescription. We set up orders direct with Tena and they deliver pads. Only for chronic incontinence and no more the 4 pads a day. Which ie a help to people as the larger tena products cost a pound a pad!


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## grumpy goby (Jan 18, 2012)

These sort of threads make me wonder what my neighbours say about us behind our back lol...

My OH works from home so do they assume he is unemployed when they see him out and about midweek?
Do they judge us on what car we drive, or what motorbike he has parked up in the back? Where we shop for food? When we come home late at night? Do they assume benefits are paying for these because they dont see him get up and go out every day for work?


I really dont get curtain twitchers.... really.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

people like that never think the best or good about anybody.


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## Aubrie30 (Aug 10, 2014)

grumpy goby said:


> These sort of threads make me wonder what my neighbours say about us behind our back lol...
> 
> My OH works from home so do they assume he is unemployed when they see him out and about midweek?
> Do they judge us on what car we drive, or what motorbike he has parked up in the back? Where we shop for food? When we come home late at night? Do they assume benefits are paying for these because they dont see him get up and go out every day for work?
> ...


I agree, I know this thread turned out funny but the sentiments in the OP makes me feel abit sad to be honest. A person that sees me out and about with my children regularly might reach the same conclusion about me as the OP did about those women.

I am often on my own with my kids, my husband is a soldier and is away most of the time. We are entitled to benefits because his wage is awful. I'm in my twenties and I have two children aged five and two. I don't work because my children have enough upheaval as it is with their dad coming and going constantly, without me being away from them too. I wonder what judgements the OP would make if she saw me in a pub garden last summer with my friends and kids, trying to waste some time so we didn't have to spend another whole evening by ourselves while our husband's were on tour.

My rather laboured point is, much like GG's situation and my own, that you can never really know what's going on in someone's life and you can't ever know the full extent of their circumstances so it's best not to judge.


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

gorgeous said:


> Happy Paws.
> 
> What sort of pub is it?* just a side street pub*
> 
> ...


 * No you can hear the kids running around a screaming most of the time*



simplysardonic said:


> 'Always' can be a relative context- I mean, they can't possibly be over there when the pub's shut!
> 
> They could have partners who work away & make a reasonable wage? I remember when my OH worked away I was desperately lonely.


 *]they are there most of the time and know they don't have OH's as I know these girls they live just up the road
*


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## Jellypi3 (Jan 3, 2014)

who cares how they can afford it? I pay my taxes, sure it is frustrating when people abuse the system but it's such a small portion compared to the good that the benefits system provides. 

Also, Heinz all the way...


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## Legoloon (Aug 11, 2014)

Jellypi3 said:


> who cares how they can afford it? I pay my taxes, sure it is frustrating when people abuse the system but it's such a small portion compared to the good that the benefits system provides.
> 
> Also, Heinz all the way...


It's also a drop in the ocean compared to the amount of money the big companies owe in tax!


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

Happy Paws said:


> * No you can hear the kids running around a screaming most of the time*
> 
> *]they are there most of the time and know they don't have OH's as I know these girls they live just up the road
> *


And it is your business because...?


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Happy Paws said:


> * No you can hear the kids running around a screaming most of the time*
> 
> *]they are there most of the time and know they don't have OH's as I know these girls they live just up the road
> *


I suppose top and bottom of it is they can do what they like with their time money and kids....just like you are free to walk your dog and do what pleases you.

I had 4 daughters within 4 years and at the time lived on a snotty estate.....neighbours were mostly social climbers and I didn't like them at all. I had comments like....you will never have any money with 4 kids, I had a rottie at the time and 2 cats...one neighbor told me if I wanted to "get on" on the estate, I should get rid of the cats.Someone else said they would never have a dog like that...and my reply to her was."If I had a face like yours, I wouldn't need one either."

My reply to the halfwit who thought they had any right to comment about how many children I did or didn't have was....4 kids are good enough for the Queen so its good enough for me,

I decided it was time to leave cos I didn't want to spend my life surrounded by people who had no life and only cared about what anybody else thought of them.

If these women with the children and the pub are single parents and on benefits...or not, good luck to them. Life is hard enough and if a drink or not in a pub is a happy time, good luck to them. It will soon be winter, dark nights et al...may hay whilst the sun shines.

Would you object to them sitting in a café with a coffee? How much is a cup of coffee? how much is a drink in a pub?


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

Thing is, even if you spend a lot of time thinking about things that annoy you (which you are perfectly entitled to do), it isn't going to change a thing. And in the grand scheme of life, the business of strangers doesn't really affect you, so its best just not to question it and be grateful for the things you do have.

A life on benefits is widely skewed by the media to be glamorous but it's not. I think if the vast majority of people on benefits had the option of earning a realistic living and consequently having a better quality of life, they would. However that is easier said than done, particularly when kids and single parents are involved.


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## finleyjon (Jul 1, 2012)

I'm pretty sure that my neighbours think that my OH and I are on benefits when in reality, we both work from home! I know that our postman certainly did as he kept making comments like 'oh, not in work again?' and 'I'd love your job!' when he'd see me sat on the couch through the window


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

finleyjon said:


> I'm pretty sure that my neighbours think that my OH and I are on benefits when in reality, we both work from home! I know that our postman certainly did as he kept making comments like 'oh, not in work again?' and 'I'd love your job!' when he'd see me satn the couch through the window


God, that would wind me up - judgmental idiot! I do a couple of early starts and the rest lunchtime starts and get the sarcastic "no work today?!" comments sometimes. I dare say people think that when they see me mid-morning ish with the dogs. 

What those lucky folk that work set hours every day don't realize is that the rest of the world doesn't follow their schedule. People work shifts, nights, evenings, weekends. Just people someone does not leave at 8:30am and get back at 5pm, does not mean they don't work!!


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## Legoloon (Aug 11, 2014)

People could assume that I'm on benefits too. Reality is, my husband works. I left work on a voluntary redundancy basis so I could raise my children. We lived on my redundancy payout for a few years. 

Now I'm studying full time so that in the long run my family will be better off and I'll be doing a job I'm passionate about. We still don't claim benefits though. People will make assumptions, but try to remember that you don't know the whole story and you could be very wrong.


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

I am saddened by the OP and by some of the comments on here. 

I'm on benefits, most of it is used for bills etc. Your not allowed to save, even if you were given enough to make that possible, as if you reach a certain amount of money, you are no longer entitled to benefits, I think you are not allowed any more than £14,000 or something like that.

Would you be happy if I made a list of what I spent 'your' money on?


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

I have a common saying in my classroom whenever someone sticks their nose into something that doesn't involve them - "You worry about you!". And the sticky-beaked child is usually one that DOES need to spend more time concentrating on themselves!

Just something that came to mind.....


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## Donut76 (May 15, 2013)

I can sit in the pub all day & spend less than £5 - I only drink Soda water LOL 

I DO work but have had comments off a stranger when out & about as im "not in work" - the fact I dont see my kids or hubby 4 days 1 week (other than the 40min school run) & 2 days the next & then park of the weekend the week after is irrelevant - most people have a blinkered view of working times - I do 3-4pm till 10-11pm - Ive just taken my eldest to school for a 3 day sleep over & wont see her till Saturday  coz im working Friday when she will be coming home - the same happened in July with my youngest - Picked her up from school & took her to her sleep over (brownies) then didnt see her till Monday coz of my shifts & you know what i WISH i was on benefits so that i could see my kids EVERY DAY  i HATE it 

now im not saying i dont get miffed at "some peoples" apparent ummm extravagances for want of a better word while on benefits - neither person working running an expensive car smoking drinking every day to the point of being slightly intoxicated every evening & getting help with kids days out ext (i know most of the ins & outs due to being related) BUT i wouldnt have that life either - BUT its still NON OF MY BUSINESS - unless im actually ASKED for my opinion by the people involved - then i will & have given it


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

Why is it that a criticism of someone who works hard and earns their money then spends it however they please is OK while the smallest comment about those who choose to live without working is jumped on as judgemental? I don't have to sit twitching net curtains to know which of my neighbours drive expensive cars bought with money they earned and which spend their lives in idle contemplation of how to get more from the state.


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## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

Assumptions, assumptions and more assumptions! Their husbands could be loaded for all you know. Do you know these people? I suggest you go find yourself a hobby &#128540;


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

havoc said:


> *Why is it that a criticism of someone who works hard and earns their money then spends it however they please is OK *while the smallest comment about those who choose to live without working is jumped on as judgemental? I don't have to sit twitching net curtains to know which of my neighbours drive expensive cars bought with money they earned and which spend their lives in idle contemplation of how to get more from the state.


I'm confused as to where that is tbh, but FWIW neither is OK, both are judgmental 

Good for you that you do not need to curtain twitch to know about your neighbours lives...personally I don't care enough beyond them being well so have no idea what their financial situation is and neither do I care.
If I felt they were cheating the state then I would report them and then get back to sorting my own life out :sosp:


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## Tails and Trails (Jan 9, 2014)

Colliebarmy said:


> I think if the OP is a taxpayer they have every right to wonder WTF is going on if benefit money is being spent in pubs


i know what you mean.

crosses my mind to every time a BBC or RBS exec is out on the town.


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

havoc said:


> Why is it that a criticism of someone who works hard and earns their money then spends it however they please is OK while the smallest comment about those who choose to live without working is jumped on as judgemental? I don't have to sit twitching net curtains to know which of my neighbours drive expensive cars bought with money they earned and which spend their lives in idle contemplation of how to get more from the state.


Whoa nelly, "those who choose to live without working" - firstly, you have no idea whether a complete stranger is working or not. The only way you can know this is if you know them personally and they have told you.

Secondly, in the case the of mothers, how do you know they are not supported by partners while they raise the children? or is this not allowed?

I really think few able bodied people would CHOOSE not to work.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

StormyThai said:


> I'm confused as to where that is tbh, but FWIW neither is OK, both are judgmental
> 
> *Good for you that you do not need to curtain twitch to know about your neighbours lives*...personally I don't care enough beyond them being well so have no idea what their financial situation is and neither do I care.
> If I felt they were cheating the state then I would report them and then get back to sorting my own life out :sosp:


Most of 'em don't even need to curtain twitch round here, apparently my family & our relatively ordinary lives are so fascinating they are open to discussion & assumptions by all & sundry :laugh: bless 'em, at least they're leaving some other poor bugger alone


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

Down here in London we even have the pensioners going into the pub spending there pension some even have a meal and I have seen them smoking in the pub garden,good on them I say,also we have mums with there kids mums chatting in the garden while the kids bounce on the bouncey castle or play on the swingings,who knows if they are on benefit who cares.


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

simplysardonic said:


> Most of 'em don't even need to curtain twitch round here, apparently my family & our relatively ordinary lives are so fascinating they are open to discussion & assumptions by all & sundry :laugh: bless 'em, at least they're leaving some other poor bugger alone


We have someone living on the street that has captured the imagination of everyone here :lol:

Although most moan about the mess her and the kids leave about, and the fact her million cats crap everywhere which is fair enough because most on the road look after their gardens.

Now apart from the odd one or two (you can probably guess who one of them is lol) comments about benefits, most don't care as it has nothing to do with them :ciappa:


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

> Good for you that you do not need to curtain twitch to know about your neighbours lives...personally I don't care enough beyond them being well so have no idea what their financial situation is and neither do I care


I didn't say I cared, I said I knew. I'm lucky enough to live in a community where neighbours still talk to each other. I consider such social communication an important part of my life and one of the reasons it doesn't need sorting out


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## Jackie99 (Mar 5, 2010)

It's good to know that peoples lives are so perfect in every way that they have the time to watch and judge others. It would be good to have the facts before making assumptions on how others live. Maybe they had been saving for a day out , maybe they were arranging an event there, maybe their husbands work and they are stay at home Mothers, maybe they really do have issues and are on benefits but were treating themselves to a few hours out of the house, there are so many endless explanations. Life on benefits isn't glam as people like to think.


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

havoc said:


> I didn't say I cared, I said I knew. I'm lucky enough to live in a community where neighbours still talk to each other. I consider such social communication an important part of my life and one of the reasons it doesn't need sorting out


Yes, our neighbours also talk to each other...I say hello to mine every morning when I take the dog out. We do not, and have no need to discuss anyone's financial status 

The fact you know, means you care enough to store that information :ciappa:


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

Jackie99 said:


> It's good to know that peoples lives are so perfect in every way that they have the time to watch and judge others.


well, to be fair its just what people do! We always tend to judge others lifestyle choices and compare them to our own. That isnt a bad thing its what you choose to do with your opinions that counts!


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

I used to go to work at 11pm every night and back at 6am the next morning and one of my neighbours was heard to say "she's even got a new car curtesy of our tax never seen her have a job since she moved here":dita:


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

> The fact you know, means you care enough to store that information


Of course I store it. Everyone does. It's how a village works. It's how every old person gets their share of the stuff from the Harvest Festival, how they aren't left alone if they need help, how we know who is available and happy to help out for an afternoon with a bit of gardening or heavy work someone can't manage. It's how those without personal transport don't end up taking three buses to a hospital appointment.


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

havoc said:


> Of course I store it. Everyone does. It's how a village works. It's how every old person gets their share of the stuff from the Harvest Festival, how they aren't left alone if they need help, how we know who is available and happy to help out for an afternoon with a bit of gardening or heavy work someone can't manage. It's how those without personal transport don't end up taking three buses to a hospital appointment.


Oh right...who would have thunk it that knowing which of your neighbours drive expensive cars bought with money they earned and which spend their lives in idle contemplation of how to get more from the state would lead to knowing when someone needs help 

I grew up in a village...we knew a lot about everyone..what they earned was not one of those things we either needed to know or wanted to know


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

It just gets to me that they leave school have a baby straight away get a council house and have never paid anything into the system.

As for pensions we have worked and paid all our dues so surely we are entitled to some pleasure at the end of our lives. We still pay tax on a very small pension and have to watch what we spend all the time. I wish we could spend as much money on a few little luxuries as they do in a pub everyday.

*Am I wrong in my opinions????????*


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## lorilu (Sep 6, 2009)

labradrk said:


> Whoa nelly, "those who choose to live without working" - firstly, you have no idea whether a complete stranger is working or not. The only way you can know this is if you know them personally and they have told you.
> 
> Secondly, in the case the of mothers, how do you know they are not supported by partners while they raise the children? or is this not allowed?
> 
> .


:thumbsup::thumbsup:



> I really think few able bodied people would CHOOSE not to work


I know what you are saying but can't resist responding with:

I would "choose not to work" if I was independently wealthy, haha. However I am grateful that I am ABLE to work, and do not need to live on welfare.


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## lorilu (Sep 6, 2009)

Happy Paws said:


> It just gets to me that they leave school have a baby straight away get a council house and have never paid anything into the system.
> 
> As for pensions we have worked and paid all our dues so surely we are entitled to some pleasure at the end of our lives. We still pay tax on a very small pension and have to watch what we spend all the time. I wish we could spend as much money on a few little luxuries as they do in a pub everyday.
> 
> *Am I wrong in my opinions????????*


You are *entitled *to your opinions. I just find it odd that you spend so much energy comparing your life to other people's lives.

Stop wishing for things that aren't, and try enjoying what you have for example.

Maybe you ought to widen your horizons a little. Read a book instead of looking out the window or something.


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## mrs phas (Apr 6, 2014)

Happy Paws said:


> .
> 
> *Am I wrong in my opinions????????*


Nope, just in your assumptions


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

havoc said:


> Of course I store it. Everyone does. It's how a village works. It's how every old person gets their share of the stuff from the Harvest Festival, how they aren't left alone if they need help, how we know who is available and happy to help out for an afternoon with a bit of gardening or heavy work someone can't manage. It's how those without personal transport don't end up taking three buses to a hospital appointment.


and what do your neighbours think and say about you behind your back?...you live off the earnings from breeding cats?

That's an assumption too.

another one...your house will stink cos you have cats living in it?


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

If people are on benefits its up to them how they spend their money.

If people work, its up to them how they spend their money.

Sad people have nothing better to do than sit and gossip.

Gossip is like Chinese whispers and never ends up with the whole truth.


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

> and what do your neighbours think and say about you behind your back?...


Three of them were in my house last night. The weather was good, we'd all been doing stuff outside, got to talking and ended up round my table over beers. Why would I care what they may say behind my back? As long as the time we spend together is pleasant why worry? If last night was anything to go by it would probably be that I'd failed to have enough beer in the fridge and one of them had to bring a couple with him while we quickly chilled more.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

havoc said:


> Of course I store it. Everyone does. It's how a village works. It's how every old person gets their share of the stuff from the Harvest Festival, how they aren't left alone if they need help, how we know who is available and happy to help out for an afternoon with a bit of gardening or heavy work someone can't manage. It's how those without personal transport don't end up taking three buses to a hospital appointment.


Being concerned & helping the vulnerable in a community isn't the same as catching a glimpse of someone else's life & then fabricating a story around it to share for whatever reason.

For the most part I find the whole living in each others' pockets, in & out of each others' houses, meet for coffee mornings gossipy gossip 'village life' types a little creepy.

I've always been reticent & a bit aloof, never done anyone any harm, we as a family do our bit for the 'good of the community' (but don't crow about it in the parish magazine  ) we keep ourselves to ourselves yet we are singled out by some of these type of people & talked about.

I know this as fact because they are less than diplomatic so things get said in front of their children which then get repeated to my children in school.

Maybe I'm an odd duck in that respect, but I don't necessarily think knowing everyone's business & being on 'pally' terms with everyone is always a good thing.


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

> Being concerned & helping the vulnerable in a community isn't the same as catching a glimpse of someone else's life & then fabricating a story around it to share for whatever reason.


The whole thing is anonymous and hasn't hurt anyone. I can't understand why everyone gets so worked up about it. We don't know the identity of the storyteller or the subjects - or if it even happened.


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## Calvine (Aug 20, 2012)

Muze said:


> The foodbank does not work like that, you have to get a voucher after having a professional deem you in 'hardship'. You cannot just wander in, show proof of benefits and take what you want.
> 
> And, well single Mum's do rake it in on benefits tbh.
> 
> But equally, did they buy much? I've spent nearly all day in pub waiting for a friend travelling down from Durham, I spent about a fiver all day lol


MUZE: I haven't a clue how (or where) foodbanks operate but I'm amazed to hear that they would deliver (as stated by a previous poster). Almost as good as Ocado then?


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## LolaBoo (May 31, 2011)

Their lives let them do what they want you dont know their situations no need to judge anyone


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

simplysardonic said:


> Being concerned & helping the vulnerable in a community isn't the same as catching a glimpse of someone else's life & then fabricating a story around it to share for whatever reason.
> 
> For the most part I find the whole living in each others' pockets, in & out of each others' houses, meet for coffee mornings gossipy gossip 'village life' types a little creepy.
> 
> ...


I grew up in a beautiful little village....complete with plenty village idiots. Gossip was rife.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

single mums do not rake it in on benefits. Children are expensive, clothing and feeding them.

Not all single mums are single cos they got pregnant in order to have free housing and loads of benefits....plenty plenty out there simply cos they got screwed over by an ex partner/husband.

I am sure plenty single mums would choose to work if they had enough support for child care. 

1 of my daughters has twins who are now aged 9. daughter is a chef and works long and hard for her money....she couldn't do this if I didn't help out with free child care for her.She works cos she doesn't want to be on benefits. If she didn't live close by, I couldn't help her out and she would have no choice.


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## astro2011 (Dec 13, 2011)

You seriously dislike anyone with kids I feel. You might find people have paid in and something has happened. I hate how people on benefits is different to the pension lol! You seem to think all your money goes on other people, but when it comes to the pension you paid that yourself.

Seriously get a hobby.


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

lilythepink said:


> single mums do not rake it in on benefits. Children are expensive, clothing and feeding them.
> 
> Not all single mums are single cos they got pregnant in order to have free housing and loads of benefits....plenty plenty out there simply cos they got screwed over by an ex partner/husband.
> 
> ...


Your daughter is one of the one's these silly TV programmes and newspapers would not be interested in, they are only interested in the ones who are in the minority but they like us to think they are the majority,makes good news and gives people something to moan about.Being a chef is the hardest job going and I admire her.xx


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

astro2011 said:


> You seriously dislike anyone with kids I feel. You might find people have paid in and something has happened. I hate how people on benefits is different to the pension lol! You seem to think all your money goes on other people, but when it comes to the pension you paid that yourself.
> 
> Seriously get a hobby.


I have to say and I am one nownot all pensioners have worked all there lives people make me cross when they say that, there have always been people that did'nt work and scrounged so they are getting the biggest benefit of all.


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## sid&kira (Oct 15, 2009)

Do you know they're unemployed? 

You could see me out with my friends and our kids (we dont have as many tho), we're young twenties, one is a photographer, one a carer for an elderly relative and obviously I run Indi-dog. We dont go to work but we still work and earn. My OH works long hours so its rare to see us together so i probably look like a single mum too


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## havoc (Dec 8, 2008)

> You could see me out with my friends and our kids


Any of us could see anyone and form an opinion. It doesn't make a blind bit of difference to either party so why get so hot under the collar? These threads are never about the original subject, they just end up with people being judgemental about those they call judgemental :lol:


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## harley bear (Feb 20, 2010)

Nowt much changes round here! Happy Paws you are still a misrrable old drone.... How do you know their partners are not away fighting for your freedom? Or in bed because they have been working a night shift? Frankly its none of your business! 
Your pension is a benefit, regardless of how many yrs you paid into the system it is the working people who are jow paying for your BENEFIT. 

Look at your own bitter life before you judge others.


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## lostbear (May 29, 2013)

Colliebarmy said:


> Theyve been saving on the shopping by begging at the local foodbank
> 
> it leaves them £80 a week for beer and ****


I love you CB - you never disappoint! :thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

havoc said:


> Any of us could see anyone and form an opinion. It doesn't make a blind bit of difference to either party so why get so hot under the collar? *These threads are never about the original subject*, they just end up with people being judgemental about those they call judgemental :lol:


The same goes for many, many threads, such is the nature of forums


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

lilythepink said:


> Nobody else's business where anybody spends their money...benefit money or not.


ah, its not THEIR money though is it


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

lostbear said:


> I love you CB - you never disappoint! :thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:


get in there.......trouble is telling like it is upsets quite a few....

tough


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

Colliebarmy said:


> ah, its not THEIR money though is it


Just interested to know if you think disability payments and pensions are not their money?


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

Its difficult to deny that generous hand-outs have created a Welfare State where second and third generation families have never had a job in their lives. Part of the new government crack-downs and sanctions have been brought into force because of this very issue. Then we have the issue of immigrants trying to storm ferries in Calais, in the belief that our government provides a life of luxury without having to go to work!

Unfortunately, lots of very genuine claimants get caught in the cross-fire ie the bedroom tax, and those with genuine illness and disability.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Colliebarmy said:


> ah, its not THEIR money though is it


well who do you think it belongs to then?

what would you prefer? going back to Dickensian times where single mums and pregnant women with no man /father to provide for them live on the streets and children starve?

If more absent dads paid what they need to pay then the state wouldn't have to.

I get so tired of hearing about scrounging single mums...takes 2 to make a baby cos it needs 2 lots of money to bring a baby up.

We don't live in a 3rd world country and this is 21st century.


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## suewhite (Oct 31, 2009)

Colliebarmy said:


> ah, its not THEIR money though is it


Blooming heck CB if I gave you £50 it would then be yours to spend,same as people drawing any benefit its theres to spend.


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## Aubrie30 (Aug 10, 2014)

Colliebarmy said:


> ah, its not THEIR money though is it


It is my money and I'll do whatever I want with it


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## catz4m8z (Aug 27, 2008)

rona said:


> Just interested to know if you think disability payments and pensions are not their money?


well, pensions are _yours_ if you have paid income tax same as disability payments but if you havent then its money that you got from the government who in turn got it from people who are paying income tax now!



suewhite said:


> Blooming heck CB if I gave you £50 it would then be yours to spend,same as people drawing any benefit its theres to spend.


Difference is that you can choose to give CB £50...it might annoy you if you couldnt afford a trip to the pub and yet CB could with the £50 you just gave him/her!!

just sayin' is all....


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

grumpy goby said:


> These sort of threads make me wonder what my neighbours say about us behind our back lol...
> 
> My OH works from home so do they assume he is unemployed when they see him out and about midweek?
> Do they judge us on what car we drive, or what motorbike he has parked up in the back? Where we shop for food? When we come home late at night? Do they assume benefits are paying for these because they dont see him get up and go out every day for work?
> ...


I start work at 8am and I'm often still there at 8pm, 10pm, sometimes midnight. I also work some Saturdays. I do NOT receive overtime, ever.

Therefore I am fortunate enough to receive one weekday a week off in lieu. On those days I might go down to Tesco at 11am in my leggings and hoodie. I would not be surprised if many assume I am unemployed; after all, I don't have a child with me.

I couldn't give two hoots though. Like many, I work hard for my living. While there are obvious benefits cheats out there who understandably piss the rest of us off, I don't mind paying into the system.

I pay for income protection, but I still don't know that I won't need the benefits system myself one day.



suewhite said:


> Down here in London we even have the pensioners going into the pub spending there pension some even have a meal and I have seen them smoking in the pub garden,good on them I say,also we have mums with there kids mums chatting in the garden while the kids bounce on the bouncey castle or play on the swingings,who knows if they are on benefit who cares.


Oh, London, don't start that again! :lol:


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

Last time I was in London. There was a dog. A blooming dog I tell ya in a pub! Yes a blooming pub. And this dog sat in her own chair at a table! Her own chair, heaven forbid! And if that isn't bad enough, she had some sausages. Yes her own dinner. A plate of sausages!

Even the flipping dogs are arrogant!


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

The benefits system is there to help anybody out who needs it. There are always going to be people who cheat the system but for the people who need it, its a life saver.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

gorgeous said:


> Last time I was in London. There was a dog. A blooming dog I tell ya in a pub! Yes a blooming pub. And this dog sat in her own chair at a table! Her own chair, heaven forbid! And if that isn't bad enough, she had some sausages. Yes her own dinner. A plate of sausages!
> 
> Even the flipping dogs are arrogant!


oh no...what about the cats?


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

lilythepink said:


> The benefits system is there to help anybody out who needs it. There are always going to be people who cheat the system but for the people who need it, its a life saver.


And for some people, its simply a way of life!


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> And for some people, its simply a way of life!


absolutely...always going to have scroungers and con artists but I there are more genuine claimants out there than cheats.


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

lilythepink said:


> absolutely...always going to have scroungers and con artists but I there are more genuine claimants out there than cheats.


I would beg to differ! Without doubt, there are genuine claimants (including single mothers who, IMO, such be at home with their children), but the system is shot with shirkers and cheats at epidemic proportions. The government is paying out multi billions in benefits.


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## labradrk (Dec 10, 2012)

Shoshannah said:


> I start work at 8am and I'm often still there at 8pm, 10pm, sometimes midnight. I also work some Saturdays. I do NOT receive overtime, ever.
> 
> Therefore I am fortunate enough to receive one weekday a week off in lieu. *On those days I might go down to Tesco at 11am in my leggings and hoodie. *I would not be surprised if many assume I am unemployed; after all, I don't have a child with me.
> 
> ...


Wot, Tescos at 11am in leggings and a hoodie? unemployed chav alert!  I must look even worse at Lidl's in my dirty dog walking clothes - MEGA unemployed chav alert!


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> I would beg to differ! Without doubt, there are genuine claimants (including single mothers who, IMO, such be at home with their children), *but the system is shot with shirkers and cheats at epidemic proportions.* The government is paying out multi billions in benefits.


Do you have proof of this?


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> I would beg to differ! Without doubt, there are genuine claimants (including single mothers who, IMO, such be at home with their children), but the system is shot with shirkers and cheats at epidemic proportions. The government is paying out multi billions in benefits.


so, single mothers should be at home with children...if that's what single mums want, what if they don't want?what if they prefer to work?

and how can that work...single mums at home with kids....no choice but go on benefits.

Single mums don't always plan it that way...without benefits most would be stuck in a bad relationship.

single mums are bringing up our next generation of adults.


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## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

And so are single Dad's , as are 50/50 parents ..... It's not always about the mum ..... Oh hell off on another tangent we go


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

lilythepink said:


> so, single mothers should be at home with children...if that's what single mums want, what if they don't want?what if they prefer to work?
> 
> and how can that work...single mums at home with kids....no choice but go on benefits.
> 
> ...


Simple, if they want, they can go out to work!


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> Simple, if they want, they can go out to work!


but you just said in your opinion single mums should be at home with their children..and I just replied to that.


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

lilythepink said:


> but you just said in your opinion single mums should be at home with their children..and I just replied to that.


You totally missed my point! Regarding benefits there for those who genuinely need it ie single mums ie single mums should not be deemed as scroungers if they choose to spend pre school years at home with their children.


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## Blackcats (Apr 13, 2013)

Yes, I too would like to see proof that most benefit claims are cheats, liars and scroungers.

Or is it, once again, an assumption based on bugger all.


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

Happy Paws, have the 3 Mums and their kids left the pub yet?


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

Blackcats said:


> Yes, I too would like to see proof that most benefit claims are cheats, liars and scroungers.
> 
> Or is it, once again, an assumption based on bugger all.


*Benefit fraud is a serious problem, with benefit thieves stealing millions of pounds from UK taxpayers preventing this money from being used for people in real need.*

Benefit Fraud

Is that plain enough for you!


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## Blackcats (Apr 13, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> *Benefit fraud is a serious problem, with benefit thieves stealing millions of pounds from UK taxpayers preventing this money from being used for people in real need.*
> 
> Benefit Fraud
> 
> Is that plain enough for you!


Nooooo, it's not plain enough for me!!!!!

That link you gave is providing what exactly?

That it is 'supoosedly' a problem and that's all.

Sorry, I don't go by on anything like that.

Still asking for proof to back up your 'assumptions'


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

Ang2 said:


> *Benefit fraud is a serious problem, with benefit thieves stealing millions of pounds from UK taxpayers preventing this money from being used for people in real need.*
> 
> Benefit Fraud
> 
> Is that plain enough for you!


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

Thats like, almost a pie chart...damn!


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

jon bda said:


> Thats like, almost a pie chart...damn!


And do you think Tax Evasion makes benefit fraud insignificant?


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## Polski (Mar 16, 2014)

http://blogs.channel4.com/factcheck/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2013/09/BenefitFraud1609.jpg

Thats the only one I could find right now but losses to fraud are always quoted as far less than the amount UNDER claimed or tax evasion....at the end of the day benefit fraud and tax evasion are the same thing...they both take money out of the economy yet most applaud the likes of Barlow, Moyles and Carr for their crafty manipulation of the system and lets face it half of the well to do have offshore accounts...yeah, taking it off topic so...

I believe the official figure for benefit fraud is that 0.9% of all benefit money is lost to fraud...thats nowhere near "most benefit claimants"


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

Ang2 said:


> And do you think Tax Evasion makes benefit fraud insignificant?


Fraud of anykind needs to be stamped out, but if those figures (i do apologise, it was the first thing i came across) are right...then surely its the Jimmy Carrs of this world and the tax evasion crap we need to be clamping down on first?


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## Polski (Mar 16, 2014)

jon bda said:


> Fraud of anykind needs to be stamped out, but if those figures (i do apologise, it was the first thing i came across) are right...then surely its the Jimmy Carrs of this world and the tax evasion crap we need to be clamping down on first?


Snap!

Deal with the big fish and work down is the way it should be done.


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

jon bda said:


> Fraud of anykind needs to be stamped out, but if those figures (i do apologise, it was the first thing i came across) are right...then surely its the Jimmy Carrs of this world and the tax evasion crap we need to be clamping down on first?


Don't be silly. That would hit most of our MPs, and that wouldn't do now would it?


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## Ang2 (Jun 15, 2012)

jon bda said:


> Fraud of anykind needs to be stamped out, but if those figures (i do apologise, it was the first thing i came across) are right...then surely its the Jimmy Carrs of this world and the tax evasion crap we need to be clamping down on first?


In my opinion, they are both fraud!

Benefit fraud £1.2bn? Tip of the iceberg? Staggering amount, nonetheless!


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

Ang2 said:


> *Benefit fraud is a serious problem, with benefit thieves stealing millions of pounds from UK taxpayers preventing this money from being used for people in real need.*
> 
> Benefit Fraud
> 
> Is that plain enough for you!


So no, you have no proof


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## tincan (Aug 30, 2012)

Who the hell believes any of the Governments statistics ??? .... Hugely fudged to con the populous ............ Who is the fraudster / cheat now .


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

Ang2 said:


> Benefit fraud £1.2bn


Estimated tax evasion £120bn...i really wish there was supposed to be a decimal point in there...


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## MCWillow (Aug 26, 2011)

Ang2 said:


> Can you read? Its pretty self explanatory, linked to a government website. The clues are in the words 'serious problem' benefit thieves' and 'stealing milliions'


It says Leeds are clamping down on benefit fraud....

I read that bit! Do I collect £200 and pass go?


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)




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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

I knew a guy who conned the system for over 20 years. Once his step daughter left home and he could no longer abuse her, he made a remarkable recovery. 
Went to work and bought his council house at a knock down price, sold it at a massive profit and is now wealthy retired to France :cursing:


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## Ceiling Kitty (Mar 7, 2010)

Calm down, kids...


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

closed to read, but I'll tell ya I haven't seen my Grand Daughter for 3 years so your not a priority today!


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## canuckjill (Jun 25, 2008)

re opened, debate as you wish but any more personal arguments and it will be closed again


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## Guest (Sep 10, 2014)

This thread reminds me that some of the most generous, most grateful, and happiest people I have known didnt have two pennies to rub together, lived in abject poverty (and not the kind of poverty we westerners think of when we think of poverty), and still managed to do for others, be kind, and when they did nosey on their neighbors, did it to see how they could help, not hurt.

Funny eh?


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## gorgeous (Jan 14, 2009)

lilythepink said:


> oh no...what about the cats?


I could only take the dog! Lily loves London.


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## DoodlesRule (Jul 7, 2011)

lilythepink said:


> The benefits system is there to help anybody out who needs it. There are always going to be people who cheat the system but for the people who need it, its a life saver.





Ang2 said:


> And for some people, its simply a way of life!


I was a single mother, not by choice either. I was married but when I was pregnant daddy decided he did not want to be a daddy  I worked had no option and other than child benefit never had a bean of anyone, not even maintenance! There really wasn't the benefits available back then.

I am glad I have always been able to work and have my own home and my son has the same work ethic.

However, hand on heart if there had been the current system back then whereby I could have had a council house and receive more in benefits than I would earn going out to work I cannot say I wouldn't have done so. Probably not as my Dad would have had a fit!

I was also fortunate that my parents provided the child care whilst I worked full time. Nursery costs were bad enough back then but they are extortinate now have no idea how anyone affords it.

The bottom line is that single parents on benefits are not committing benefit fraud they are legitimately claiming what the government makes available.


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## lilythepink (Jul 24, 2013)

Daughter with twins left her husband when the twins were 4 cos life was getting unbearable.

She asked if we could help her out for a couple of weeks. She came to stay here and we thought they would sort things out but they didn't.

She stayed for 4 months and didn't work during that time but we supported her.

After 4 months, she found herself a job and a rental house about 8 miles from here. She pays her own rent, not benefits.

She got a solicitors letter from the dad asking for a divorce and also saying he wanted nothing more to do with the twins until they reached 18.

He refused to pay any support so she went to CSA. He has a very good job but he fixed his paperwork so he is shown as on minimum wage and so has to pay less CSA.

CSA is set at £200 a month in total. They cost me more than that.

My daughter is lucky, twins have never gone without, thankfully we have a benefits system in place for other children not so fortunate.


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## simplysardonic (Sep 1, 2009)

MCWillow said:


> It says Leeds are clamping down on benefit fraud....
> 
> I read that bit! *Do I collect £200 and pass go*?


I believe you may have collected that £200 fraudulently :hand:


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## Sophiebee (Jul 9, 2013)

MCWillow said:


> It says Leeds are clamping down on benefit fraud....
> 
> I read that bit!*Do I collect £200 and pass go?*


Just dont spend any of it in the pub.  This thread just makes me sad, surely there are more important things. If you (and this is a general you) care that much about other peoples lives (and have time to monitor their wheareabouts,) then volunteer in the community, find someone truly needy and help them, make a positive difference somewhere, instead of just looking for the negative.


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

I'd just like to add.

1. I don't spend all day looking out of the window, I do have a life.
2. I see them when I take Dillon out the front for toilet breaks as he won't wee in the garden.
3. I can hear the kids screaming nearly all afternoon and early evening.
4. It's not just one day they are outside the pub it's most week days.


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## ForestWomble (May 2, 2013)

Happy Paws said:


> I'd just like to add.
> 
> 1. I don't spend all day looking out of the window, I do have a life.
> 2. I see them when I take Dillon out the front for toilet breaks as he won't wee in the garden.
> ...


Have you ever been in the pub when they are there?

If yes, then fair enough.
If no, how do you know that they do not work there?


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## StormyThai (Sep 11, 2013)

Happy Paws said:


> I'd just like to add.
> 
> 1. I don't spend all day looking out of the window, I do have a life.
> 2. I see them when I take Dillon out the front for toilet breaks as he won't wee in the garden.
> ...


1. Then how do you know they are inside the pub all day?

3. I get kids screaming all the time around here too, doesn't mean the parents are in the pub and it doesn't mean they are the same kids screaming.

4. Being outside the pub does not mean they are spending money, and even if they were what is it to do with anyone but them?


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## Happy Paws2 (Sep 13, 2008)

Animallover26 said:


> *Have you ever been in the pub when they are there? *
> 
> If yes, then fair enough.
> If no, how do you know that they do not work there?


Yes I have been in, but not very often I don't like pubs at the best of times, and it's only 5 houses down on the other side of the road.

And no they don't work there, I know that for a fact as I know the staff there.

And as I've already said, I do know these girls, I chat to them they are taking the kids to school and I'm taking Dillon walk.


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## LinznMilly (Jun 24, 2011)

Haven't read all the replies (got to page 10).

I'm currently on the sick from work. Have been for 3 weeks.

I've been on the sick around this time of year, every year for 3 consecutive years. Always with the same problem - eczema, and/or complications with eczema. It's the only time I've ever been on the sick (touch wood - so far), but every time, I feel like I'm skiving simply because my head's not welded to my pillow. God only knows how people with mental illnesses feel. 

This time, I've had a serious complication with my skin - not just secondary infection - Herpes, of all things. Luckily that's subsiding, but eczema's back with a vengeance after I'd had to temporarily stop the tablets which were fighting to get that under control, to deal with the cold sore virus. I'm on immune-suppressant drugs to get the eczema under control - have been for a few months, and already things seem to be getting worse, if the Herpes is anything to go by, so my medium to long term future as a carer/ or working in general, hangs in the balance at the moment.

No doubt any neighbour who might happen to know that I work, or any of my nastier minded colleagues who might have seen me - would have thought I was skiving if they'd seen me washing the car this afternoon. :001_rolleyes: Going by the opening post of this thread, one can presume the OP would be one of them.

You don't know the facts as to why those women were in the pub with their kids that day. There could be any number of reasons or ways they could afford it. FWIW, I've read CB's thread about the woman at the food bank paying for taxies home, too, and the same applies to him. People who judge me - I really wish _they _would take a walk in my shoes. Judging by the people who have suffered eczema temporarily, or who have skin allergies and who have come back to me to ask how I cope with it day in, day out every damned day of my life, that mile would be half a mile away, and the other half a mile back to me.


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## Polski (Mar 16, 2014)

You have my sympathies with the eczema, I've suffered severe bouts for years (some bouts lasted years!) but I've been fairly (99.9%) clear for the past 13 years now. 

Judgemental people are everywhere...I remember one of the redtop rags running a story on some of the "ridiculous" reasons people are off sick. Acne and eczema were on there and the comments were vile but ignorance is bliss for these fools. Do they really think any GP would write a sick note for a few zits?? Cystic acne is debilitating, mentally and physically. As for eczema I can only assume they think its a bit of a rash...but its far more, from disturbed sleep to blood poisoning and lots in between.


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## rona (Aug 18, 2011)

Sophiebee said:


> Just dont spend any of it in the pub.  This thread just makes me sad, surely there are more important things. If you (and this is a general you) care that much about other peoples lives (and have time to monitor their wheareabouts,) then volunteer in the community, find someone truly needy and help them, make a positive difference somewhere, instead of just looking for the negative.


Bit difficult to become a volunteer if you have had a stroke!!!

Sometimes you just know stuff about others, you don't have to make it up


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## Guest (Sep 11, 2014)

Happy Paws said:


> I'd just like to add.
> 
> 1. I don't spend all day looking out of the window, I do have a life.
> 2. I see them when I take Dillon out the front for toilet breaks as he won't wee in the garden.
> ...


1. Be grateful for having a life that keeps you busy and entertained.
2. Be grateful for your eyesight.
3. Be grateful for your hearing.
4. Be grateful for a mind that works well enough to keep track of days.

Fill up with enough gratefulness and you wont care who is spending money on what


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## Guest (Sep 11, 2014)

rona said:


> Bit difficult to become a volunteer if you have had a stroke!!!


Is it now?

There is a gentleman in one of our therapy groups who has had a stroke, lost mobility on one entire side, had a really rough time of it for a while. He is now back doing visits (that would be volunteer work), with his cane and his wonderful dog, helping others.

A friend of mine recently went through a second battle with cancer. While still doing chemo, having lost all her hair, her strength, tons of weight, still found the strength to deliver meals to shut-ins on her good days.

Its all in what you decide to focus on.


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## MerlinsMum (Aug 2, 2009)

Coming in a bit late here, but I'm on benefits.

I get £60pw carer's allowance for looking after my mum 24/7 plus a bit of income support on top. If I didn't get that Income Support top-up I wouldn't get free prescriptions for my own health issues - and indeed, I had a letter fining me for alleged prescription fraud a few months ago, when my Income Support was held up due to a glitch (not my fault) and I needed a repeat prescription.

I work harder for that benefit income than almost anyone in a paid job - I have a total of 18 hours a week off (out of 168) as Mum can't be left on her own, meaning even when I'm asleep I'm still 'on call'.

I basically work for £1.68 per hour. *Edit* - that should read 60p an hour! (maths fail)

I haven't had more than 6hrs to myself in a 24hr period for over 18 months - if I wanted a "day off" (what's that??) it has to go through the social worker, and the respite place is fully booked up 3 months in advance.

There are no family members or friends I can call on if I really get to breaking point, to give me a day off. I have to grin and bear it.

And yes I DO get cabin fever - a lot, especially in the summer. Or when I am just tired.... so tired... in fact i can't imagine what I would do with a whole 24hrs to myself.


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## northnsouth (Nov 17, 2009)

ClaireLouise said:


> You can if you fit the criteria, I do the assessments as part of my job. And you dont pay for the prescription either its not the type of prescription. We set up orders direct with Tena and they deliver pads. Only for chronic incontinence and no more the 4 pads a day. Which ie a help to people as the larger tena products cost a pound a pad!


IF they fit the criteria..
We have patients who need these products to live a comfortable life, they do not fit the criteria and have to buy them. It is shameful.
Merlins Mum my heart goes out to you. My siblings and I cared for my Mum until she had to go into a home, There is no way on earth any of us could have done that alone..


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