# Grieving horse



## slw (May 3, 2011)

Hi, I usually post in the cat section on here.
We sadly lost one of our horses to colic today. He was nearly 30. His life long companion is the same age and is calling and pacing everywhere looking for his friend. What has happened is upsetting enough, but watching our other horse looking for his friend is heartbreaking.
Is there anything we can do to help?! He is obviously getting extra fuss and I thought about putting both feed bowls out at meal times with half his feed in each.
Thank you for reading.


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## Rafa (Jun 18, 2012)

So sorry to hear you lost your old boy today. It's truly heartbreaking.

I had a similar situation a year ago.

I had a gelding, Paddy, and my Sister has a gelding, Jimmy, both were then 26 and had been together for twenty years.

I lost Paddy, very suddenly, also to colic and Jim was absolutely lost without him. To make matters worse, Paddy was always a dominant gelding and Jim always bottom in the pecking order. Paddy had always protected Jimmy in the field and Jimmy obviously felt very unsafe without him.

Sadly, there is little you can do. Only time will help, though we did find that allowing Jim to become attached to another horse, with whom he felt safe, helped.

I do feel for you. Dealing with the shock and grief of losing your beloved horse so suddenly is bad enough, but seeing his companion searching for him is awful.

Your boy will adjust in time and all you can really do for now is spend as much time with him as you can.


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## slw (May 3, 2011)

Thank you for your reply Rafa. 

I’m sorry to hear of your loss last year. 

Although Red had Cushings, he has never had colic before in his life. I had given them some carrot tops just before this happened ( they have them from time to time) and so I’ve been wondering and worrying if these caused it, but the vet said not. It’s an awful feeling to think it could have contributed. 

They eat hedges and nettles, but it’s the fact I gave the carrot tops not long before his symptoms started. 

Did you have more horses besides Paddy and Jim? We just had the 2, and our remaining horse, Ken, has always been the dominant one. I think getting a companion for him would stress him. It’s difficult to know what to do. He seems okay one minute, then he’s on a mission pacing round the fields looking for Red and calling. 

He was there when Red died and was very calm and quiet. He saw his body until it was taken away, so we thought this may help with him knowing what has happened. 

I just hate to think of him being out there on his own and feeling lonely!


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## Teddy-dog (Nov 2, 2017)

So sorry to hear about your loss  how heart breaking 

i would consider getting your remaining horse a friend. If he is by himself now he will be grieving and also missing horsey company. They are herd animals so do do better in company. Perhaps you could reach out to some local rescues and adopt one on full loan? Then if it doesn’t work out you have some back up. You can do introductions over a fence line to be sure they will get on ok.


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## Rafa (Jun 18, 2012)

I gave Paddy carrots every day of his life. He did not ail a thing until the day he died. Please be assured that what you fed your boy did not cause his death.

Thirty is a wonderful age and to have two get to that age is an absolute testament to how well you have cared for them.

We had Paddy and Jim on a livery yard, so there were other horses. As you know, horses are not solitary creatures, so I do believe your boy needs a companion.

Maybe contact your local sanctuary to see if they have an old boy?

Whereabouts are you?


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## slw (May 3, 2011)

Thank you, Teddy dog and Rafa. 

We are in between Derbyshire and Leicestershire and near to Nottingham. I believe there is a horse sanctuary in Nottingham. I will discuss this with my family and it may be worth contacting a sanctuary to have a chat with them about it. 

We can keep horses apart by shutting a gate inbetween the fields, so that was useful advice, thank you. 

It all seems like a bad dream at the moment! 

Thank you for replying and your advice.


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## Ringypie (Aug 15, 2012)

Just wanted to say I’m so so sorry for your loss. Please don’t blame yourself at all, your horse had reached a grand old age and that alone is testament to your love and care.
An elderly mare on my yard passed away from colic a few years ago, never been a colicky sort, just come in from the field and was tied up while she was being changed into her pyjamas. Her field mate was devastated at first but over about a week she gradually came to terms with it - but it was heartbreaking to watch. It’s still early days, hopefully your boy settle soon.


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## slw (May 3, 2011)

Thank you, Ringypie. 

Ken called a lot overnight, but has been acting quite normal today. I’ve not heard him call since about 7am. 

I know a lady in a nearby village that had lots of ponies and is now down to just one senior mare, so I’m going to try and see her to ask how her mare coped with being on her own. We are going to see how Ken gets on for now before rushing into anything.


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## Stallion (Dec 4, 2020)

Had that happen last year had to put down my moms mare and one of my mares Cheyenne that was her best bud grieved for a few months, other horses didnt seam to help sometimes the best thing is lots of hugs and kisses and attention.


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## slw (May 3, 2011)

Thank you for your advice Stallion. 
It’s been a few months now and we didn’t end up getting another horse for a few reasons. Ken seemed okay very quickly after losing Red, in fact he seems more calm and friendly! He has always been the dominant one and wouldn’t come over for fuss or attention, in fact he could be quite ratty! But, he’s a changed horse and enjoys a fuss. 
He seems quite content, though it seems strange seeing just one horse in the field.


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## Stallion (Dec 4, 2020)

Your welcome! and im glad to hear hes doing well and for the change in temperment!


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