# My cat died 5 years ago and I still miss her.



## Raichu (Oct 25, 2016)

I miss her and feel extremely guilty. Lily came into the family when I was 11, and she was 6. 

When I was 17 my parents got divorced and she went to live with my dad, so I did too. But I didn't get on with him so I spent more and more time at my mums. I still went round often to see her when he was at work, and I was desperate to take her back to mum's with me, but mum had two cats of her own and Lily hated other cats. 

After a few years, my dad and his new wife didn't pay her much attention or even let her go upstairs. She loved sleeping on beds and eventually they didn't even let her on the sofas. Whenever I went round to see her, I sat on the floor with my legs out and she got on and nuzzled my face like crazy and would purr endlessly until I had to leave. I spent the whole time telling her I loved her and missed her and I felt she was saying the same. I missed her so much during those days. 

One day my dad phoned me to say she had been put to sleep. We knew she had been getting sick but I'd had no idea how bad it was. If I'd known, I would've stayed at his house every day and had her on the bed with me. They told me his wife had comforted her when she died but I feel so guilty that I wasn't there and I feel she would've wanted me. I didn't even live in the same house and didn't see her nearly as often as I wanted. It makes me so sad that she slept alone and spent a lot of time alone in her final days when I was so desperate to be with her. 

I often wish I'd taken her to live with me at mums, but at the time I was too worried about the other cats. For the whole time we'd had her she's been very antisocial with all other animals and even humans outside the family. At the time I didn't want to stress her out by taking her to a strange home with other cats when she was old and easily stressed. But now I wish I'd done it so I could've been there for her when she died and maybe given her a better end to her life. We had years together and I feel I betrayed her in the end by not staying with her. It's been five years and the bottom line is I miss her terribly and so often I wish I could have one day where she was here with me, just so we could sleep next to each other and I could say goodbye.


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## Colliebarmy (Sep 27, 2012)

we all wish for that 1 extra day to do the things we could have/should have/would have done but it sounds like Lily was cared for and in this world too many furbies never get that.

dont beat yourself up.


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## JerryRosie2014 (Aug 31, 2016)

Hope you're ok xxx I don't think I'll ever stop missing Jerry it's not quite a week yet so obviously very raw but I do think I will feel like you and still miss him even after a long time, I'm always about to chat xxxx


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## Guest (Dec 9, 2016)

My first dog when I was a kid was Bonnie a little black ans white collie, my parents are divorced as well and Bonnie lived with me at my moms house. As my stepfather at the time hated animals Bonnie never got into the house and I used to sneak her into our garage and some nights I even slept with her on a blow up bed in the garage. I hated not being able to bring her inside. When Bonnie was 9months old my stepfather left our back gate open one evening and Bonnie got out and was hit by a council lorry who took her remains with them because she wasnt wearing her collar and tags so I came back from school that day to find out I would never see her again. Now, my ex-stepfather is nolonger in the picture and we have another dog who is a much loved member of the family. W e do everything together and she sleeps in my bed everynight. But I still feel so guilty that I couldnt have gave Bonnie a life like this and I miss her everyday.


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